Heat of the Flame
by BlackWiltedRose
Summary: FINISHED! He was the leader, proud and stern. I was a rich orphan looking for my place in the world. Both on the brink of destruction, our hearts led us in to each others arms. But ignorance threatened to tare us apart.He was my savior and I was the flame
1. Prologue

I have decided to fix and add of few things to the prologue. Because after re-reading it I found a few mistakes and things that I wanted to change. Like for instance in my authors not I wrote dew instead of do. Lol, I don't know how that happened. Well I hope that you enjoy it. For those of you who are just beginning to read this. Don't judge me to harshly this is my first Newsies fic. Don't think I'm being conceded when I say this, but I love reviews. I just like to know what people think and there opinions that's all, but I mean who doesn't. Well review and let me know what you think. Thanks

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the people or places from the Newsies. I wish I did, but I don't. I do however own everything and everyone that you don't recognize.

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Prologue

Sometimes there are things in life that not even the most well educated scholars of our time would be able to decipher. Like why murder's roam free on the streets of every city and every town, killing at will and yet there still remains no retribution for there actions. But every second innocent children will die of disease or be left alone to survive in the harsh world that we created for them. Where is the compassion that we once had, where is the sympathy and guilt?

It has been buried beneath the cruel harshness of reality. Beaten down to nothing more than a tiny spot in the back of our hearts that hold onto everything good that had once been there. I don't know about you. But in the world I live in, as quickly as you learn to speak, you learn to take in what happiness you can and shield your eyes from everything that you do not wish to see.

Those who are born privileged, are lucky. They live in large extravagant houses and wear expensive clothing. There children will never know the disappointment of being denied anything. But nor will they ever have the satisfaction of earning a living for themselves. It is people like that, that make life worse for the majority of the underprivileged society that is New York City.

I cannot tell you why society is the way that it is. For I do not rightly know myself. In my eyes everything happens for a reason. You just live your life from day to day, waiting to see what fate has in store for you. As far as I am concerned my life is like a story book, once a chapter is over I flip the page and begin anew.

Every new day there awaits new challenges and new experiences. Some are good and others, well not so good. But I take them as they come. I hold on to nothing because there is nothing worth losing my faith. It is all that I have to keep me moving on.

Because you see, the story of my life may be just a tad bit different than your average tale. For I have had the chance to see the world like very few people have had the chance to. I have felt the joy and the hardships that come from both sides of society. I have walked the path of the average women and I am all the better for it. But I have also had to face the brutal truth of reality and the loneliness that comes from being stuck in the middle of war that will never end.

I do not deny that my life was hard, sometimes harder than most. There were times when I just wanted to throw my hands in the air and succumb to my grief. For I had been so battered and broken that I couldn't even recognize the person that I had once been. But if I had the chance to go back in time and do everything differently…I wouldn't change a thing.

The main part of my story began just as any other…

I had grown up in a rather large house in the outskirts of Manhattan. My father was a well renowned judge at the courthouse in town and made a respectable amount of money. So for sixteen years of my life I had been given nothing but the best. In the minds of everyone who spoke of my name, I was nothing but a spoiled, selfish young women who took savior in my fathers money. But what they didn't know was that money was the farthest thing from my savior. They were rather steel bars that trapped me in the cage that was my life. All I wanted was to break free from the insufferable chains that society had placed upon my wrists.

When I was seventeen my mother thought it best to send me to a finishing school in the heart of town, where they took young girls and turned them into women. In my heart I knew that I was every bit of a woman that my mother was not. But in her eyes I needed polishing, the icing to top the cake that she had been shaping for years. All I wanted was someone to look at me and appreciate everything I gave to there world. Not to tell me that I wasn't good enough.

Up until that day I had never literally lifted a finger for anything that I needed. But somehow I felt as if I had been working my entire existence, fighting a battle that I would never win. So in a desperate attempt to gain my mothers approval I did not decline the offer to attend this finishing school. Where I would be _polished_ into the perfect women, wife and daughter that they had always wanted me to be. In return, it would throw me head first into a rush of emotions that I wasn't sure I was ready to face just yet.

A new chapter of my life was beginning and it would start a downfall of events that would change my world forever. It would beat on the blockade that I had placed around my very soul, shielding my vulnerable heart from the pain of reality. But nothing would have prepared me for what was about to occur.

My father had always told me to never let the heat of the flame get to close or it would burn me. So I promised my heart that I would refrain from getting emotionally attached to anything or anyone. But little did I know that I would find the fire in the heart of a young man who was the farthest thing from normal and the biggest challenge I would have to overcome in order to finally, truly be finished.


	2. Trapped

* I have decided to go back and try to fix most of the mistakes I made with past and present tense stuff. Because really the story is the narrator telling the tale of something that happened in her life. I was writing like she was talking about what was happening right now. So I had to go back and fix it. Thanks to some of my wonderful reviewers. There are probably still mistakes with spelling and stuff. But I hope this makes the chapter better for my new readers. Luv ya all* 

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Chapter One

For three weeks now I have been attending St. Brutus's Finishing School for Young Women and my mind has already begun to relapse. I would lock myself in my study scribbling furiously in my diary of ways to escape the insufferable cruelty that was this school. My mother had always told me that I was a frighteningly stubborn child who wouldn't know decency had it smacked me upon the head. But I say she is a dull twit who could be satisfied just by merely having an existence as the stepping stone for my fathers business. For she is the epitome of what a women should be. 

I have always felt a twinge of sympathy for my mother really, having been raised as she had. For her parents where not nearly as lenient on her as she has been with me. In a way I could not blame her for what she has no control over. It was not her fault that in the eyes of men, women are to do no more than to just sit and look pretty. 

Well they had to excuse me if they thought that I would allow myself to be tied down like some wild bore. My life was not a game for them to play. I wanted something more than to just sit at home and take care of the children. I mean don't get me wrong, I would love to one day have a family, but I do not wish to be consumed by it. Of course that was the whole purpose of a finishing school and I know it.

Every day my shirt must to be cleaned, ironed and pressed. My hair must to be brushed at least twenty times and placed significantly up into a ponytail. I will then make my way down to breakfast where multiple girls just like myself where sitting awaiting there meals. While we begin eating carefully, a short lanky women with gray hair will walk in between the tables and correct our posture. Her name is Mrs. Jenkins and she is the etiquette coordinator at the school. 

"Ms. Hathway, have I not told you to first place the napkin onto your lap. Once the napkin is off the table it does not go back onto the table until you are completely finished with your meal." A young girl with wheat blonde hair nervously picked the napkin back up off the table and place it with shacking hands onto her lap. She must have been no older than myself or perhaps a year younger. But the older women did not move from her position as she lingered over the girls shoulder intently, as if waiting for a reply. "Well are you finished?" the women asked prudently after a moment of uneasy silence.

"No," the young girl spoke meekly. I could see that she was nervous, as she begun wringing the napkin in her hands.

"I think you are," Mrs. Jenkins snapped her fingers and a waitress named Krista came by. She looked down rather sympathetically at the child before hesitantly picked up her plate and carrying it away to the kitchen. The young girl whom I had found out to be named Julia, was forced to remain seated and watch as the others ate there meals. In the correct fashion, of course, that we had been taught. 

I wanted to stand up and scream out the injustice in what had just occurred. But there was no use. For they did not tolerate misbehavior at St. Brutus's nor was a lady aloud to raise her voice in the halls. I wanted nothing more than to have given Julia my food if I had been permitted, for I had rather lost my appetite. But that surely would not be morally fit in the eyes of Ms. Jenkins. I placed my napkin onto my plate and the waitress came to remove it. 

After breakfast we had an hour of leisure time to ourselves were we where aloud to wonder about, but never leave the boundaries of the school. I looked around and located Julia who was sitting alone on a bench beside the dance hall. She was reading a book quietly.

Most of the girls in this school came from proper families, as I myself had done. Yet not all of them were so lucky as I, to have been given a heart that wasn't made entirely out of stone. Every once in awhile you would be careful to stumble upon a decent person but most girls loved being rich and all the power that came along with it. So when one girl was reprimanded for there actions, that somehow exiled her from the rest of the students.

I found this to be rather ruthless and unfair so I made my way over to where Julia was sitting. Many of the ladies in the park stopped to stare at me as I passed. Shaking there heads in disapproval. I ignored there incoherent messages and pretended as if they did not exist. Once I reached the bench Julia looked up startled.

"Hello, my name is Hanna Grimmuald," I said and gave her my best smile. She took me in with regard and gently smiled in return. I could tell by the dark circles under her eyes and the blotchy redness of her cheeks, that she had be crying.

"My name is Julia Hathway." She responded quickly as if ashamed. I knew her name of course, her father was a judge also, yet not nearly as well respectable as my own.

A group of older girls walked by and stuck up there nose's as they whispered improper comments in our direction. I could tell that Julia was about to fall apart again so I took her hand in mine. "Let's take a walk." 

She stood with me and we began strolling in the opposite direction of the ladies. Soon we reached the black iron gates that signified the end of the school property. We stood at the entrance and looked through the bars out into the streets of the city. All day I had been unable to shake the uneasy feeling that had been uprising in my stomach. For the school was so very large yet somehow I still felt as if I remained trapped in a prison. I would give anything to be back home in my house. Sitting at the window in my room watching the birds who had built there nest on the ledge outside. 

On the busy street it seemed like an entirely different world. Normal ordinary people bustled around heading for work or to finish a bit of shopping. They were free to do as they wished. They had the opportunity to leave and go wherever they desired. It filled my heart with envy to see how most of the people had only a penny in there pocket and yet somehow looked at life as if it were glorious. But here I was, practically at the top of the ladder and yet all I wanted was to be just like everyone else. To walk on the ground with the rest of the world beside me.

"This may sound foolish. But have you ever wished you were somewhere else?" I asked still starring out the bars. People walked by as if we did not exist.

"It is not a foolish question at all, Hanna. Yes, I myself have dreamed of being elsewhere." She sighed. "Everyday we do the same thing over and over, it becomes a rather dull task after awhile." I turned to Julia and smiled. She smiled in return and I knew just then, that I had made a friend in a cruel world where friends were hard to come by.

"It is as if our lives our out of our hands. Everyday the decisions that comes upon us are made by someone else. I feel like I'm a puppet on a string, performing for others amusement." Julia just nodded in response.

"Just once I wish I could make a decision of my own. Be spontaneous and have fun." Julia looked longingly out onto the sidewalk where three girls were jumping rope. I looked farther out and across the street to where there stood a little restaurant called Tibby's. My stomach began to make a rumbling sound and I realized just how hungry I was.

"Then why don't we?" I asked and Julia looked up confused. "Lets sneak out and go across to that little restaurant over there. I heard of a break in the fence out back, were the older girls sneak out some nights." 

"Are you insane?" Julia asked shocked that I would even suggest such a thing. 

"Oh don't be so modest. Are you not hungry?" She thought for a few moments and then nodded her head. "Come on then, it will only be for one day. We will be back before anyone even realizes we have gone." I took her hand and pulled her along the fence. Once we reached the back I easily slid through a tiny gap between the fence and the wall, Julia followed.

I held my skirt up high as we crossed the street. Julia was looking behind her as we went, making sure that no one saw us. Most of the girls at the school were on the opposite side of the lawn, so I figured we would be ok. Not paying attention to where I was walking I almost ran into a little boy as he came out of the front door of the restaurant. He tipped his hat to me and I smiled down at him. Julia who was a nervous wreck, quickly opened the door and I followed her inside. To my surprise we were greeted by the curious eyes of about thirty young men. All of whom stood up as we entered and tipped there hats in the same fashion as the young boy had done.

I just smiled sweetly and ushered Julia over to a bar where we sat down on two empty stools, ignoring the rather improper comments from the boys behind us. The owner, an older man of about sixty, came over and took our orders. Once he had gone I turned to Julia and we began to talk quietly about school. It took about ten min's before our food arrived and I began to eat furiously. Not caring about manors or etiquette. Yet it took me no longer that two minutes into my meal to notice the young man sitting beside me, who had been starring at me none stop the entire time. 

I turned to him and smirked innocently. "Well, are you going to tell me your name Sir. or just sit there and stare at me." He looked rather shocked that I was addressing him. Most likely because girl's in my position didn't normally even acknowledge lowly street boys such as himself. 

He put his hands up to his chest and looked around, half expecting some person of higher class to be standing behind him. "Well…are you?" I asked. By then we had gained the attention of most of the boys in the room. They too were surprised that I was speaking to there friend. 

Another boy with dark blonde hair walked over and patted the kid on the shoulders, then turned to me. "This here ma'am is Racetrack. He'd tell you so himself, although I think you scared the voice outta um'." I suppressed a laugh as the dark haired boy in front of me turned a shade of red.

I remember thinking about how strange a name Racetrack was, but I would soon find out that they were just nicknames. For Tibby's Restaurant was the local hangout for Newsies, or the news boys. Of course they didn't always eat meals there, considering that most of them were homeless kids who made a living off of selling papers. They just hung around having meetings and discussing the daily events.

"Well its nice to meet you." I said sweetly. Julia who looked somewhat nervous beside me, began fidgeting with the menu. I knew that she didn't like to be the center of attention. 

I turned and became deep in conversation with the boy named Racetrack. He was a sweet kid and once he got more comfortable, was actually rather entertaining. Soon we were joined by three others, Mush, Crutchy and a kid they called Cowboy. His real name was Jack and I could tell by the way they followed his commands, that he was the leader of there group. 

Julia had begun to enjoy herself and even though she would never admit it became rather taken with Mush. But soon a loud bell ringing brought us back to the present. I looked up startled at the time and grabbed Julia's arm.

"Well we have to get back to school, it was nice talking to you gentlemen." I said and we walked to the door. I could hear someone in the background saying, "did you hear that boys, she called us gentlemen." 

I turned back around to face the group of kids, who were no older than myself. "Maybe we will stop by tomorrow. See ya around Race." I smiled sweetly at my new friend and laughed as he blushed again. Even as I listened to Julia's weak protests as we made our way back to the school I knew that I would return the next day, if I had the chance.


	3. Confrontations

*And here is yet another chapter to my story. I hope you all are enjoying it. I would like to say my thank you's to all who have read my story so far. I know it is going a little slow, but it will pick up soon, I promise. Well here is what some of you have been waiting for. Spot is indeed in this chapter. I will be saying my thank you's at the end. So if you reviewed it'll be there. Now I guess I will shut up and let you get on with the story. Continue to read and review, it lets me know that I'm not writing this for nothing .*

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Newsies characters. Although I wish that I did *grin* I do however own Julia and Hanna. Also all of the other miscellaneous characters that will be popping up throughout the story. Thanks!

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Chapter Two

I don't know whether I was doing it for myself, or just to spite my parents, but I was trying to get out of that school any chance that I could. Either way I planned on going back to Tibby's again today, with or without the help of Julia. We sat there for three excruciating hours the night before in my bunk room, discussing the different options that we had. 

Julia thought of it as too dangerous. It was fun for one day but to do it again would just be ludicrous. I tried explaining it to her, how it was my escape, a sign that I could take control of my own life. I knew that she wanted to go back as much as I did, I could see it in her deep blue eyes. But somewhere Julia's mind was telling her heart that there was something wrong.

Eventually I convinced my uncertain friend that it was alright and that there would be no chance of us getting caught. Of course, I did not know that for sure but nothing had happened the day before, so my courage was a slight bit stronger than it would have been. Yet that morning at breakfast, I found myself stopping and reconsidering it. 

If we did get caught, surely we would be sent home to our parents. I did not care, of course. But even the thought of what would happen to Julia made me uneasy. Unlike myself, this was her life. Julia planned on growing up and marrying a proper gentlemen. She wanted children and to do nothing more than raise them in the best home that she possibly could. I would not lead her down a road that she did not wish to take. So I promised myself that this would our last excursion. I may be brave enough to risk everything I had for one day of freedom, but I would not risk the livelihood of my friend.

We sat together at breakfast that morning and decided that for a precaution we would take matching shawls, so we could easily hide our faces if necessary. But there would be no need, for the perfect escape route has already been executed. The heads of the school houses planned a group tea session in the lobby this evening. Whoever wished to come was welcome. So of course that had means that every girl in the school will attend in order to make a good impression on the headmistress.

"This is absurd," Julia said to me as I drug her across the street to Tibbys. We had on one our best dresses. Julia's made of white silk with lace and velvet trim. We did this specifically to make it seem to the dorm warden that we where planning on having tea with the others. 

But it did not occur to me at first that we would be slightly over dressed for the occasion. So I felt rather out of place when we walked into the restaurant and all of the scruffy boys sat gawking at us. 

I really did not think of myself as a beautiful women. For I was the only one who knew of all my flaws. But when I had my golden blonde hair fixed up into soft curls and a nice dress on that flattered my figure, the guys seemed to drop like flies at my doorstep. It had confused me and I wasn't sure if I enjoyed the attention or not. Of course guys had liked me before. But some of the more high class kids, found me rather rambunctious and smart, but a little too eccentric for there tastes. They did not wish for me to tarnish there flawless reputations. So for me, the thought of getting such an enormous reaction at once, made me dizzy. 

I turned my gaze over to Julia who seemed to be rather shaken, but pleased all the same. The light in her eyes could not be dimmed as a group of boys fawned over her every move. I had always told her that she was very beautiful in her own way. Not drop dead gorgeous, but a natural beauty. Yet she never believed a word I said. I smiled, knowing that now maybe she would see that there were a billion guys in the world and not all of them cared if she ate with the correct fork at dinner.

I started to become rather claustrophobic within the crowd of testosterone driven young men and moved to a booth in the far corner of the room. To my surprise Racetrack and Mush were there playing a game of cards. "Hiya doll face," Racetrack said and I laughed. He moved over in order to let me sit down. I was thankful that I received no comments from either of the two, only a slightly appraising glance from Racetrack. Because in the last few minutes I had come to the conclusion that I did not enjoy all of the attention. Besides I think Julia needed the appraisal more than myself.

"How are you?" I asked the boys. Feeling a bit of sympathy for them, seeing that they were practically wearing the same clothes that they had on the day before. I began to wonder if they even had a second pair.

"Hey, could ya pass the budda," I was startled as a little kid popped up next to my head. But I reached over and handed him the stick of butter that was sitting on the table by my hand. Then as quickly as he had come, he was gone.

"Where as good as were gunna get," Racetrack responded to my question. I nodded my head. Just then Jack appeared through the mob of boys and sat down next to Mush. He didn't say anything but just starred at me. 

"So what was ya name anyway?" Jack asked finally breaking the silence. 

"It's Hanna Grimmuald," I said and watched as the boys stopped playing and Racetrack spit his drink all over his cards.

"Ya name is Grimmuald?" He asked and I nodded.

"Your fadda's the judge…" Jack said trying to make sure he had heard me correctly.

"Yes," I said more softly this time. I could not see why my father always had to be brought up in every conversation that I had. Personally that would be one good perk about getting married, I would be able to change my name.

"and you are here talkin to us?" Mush asked shocked, as if I had committed some kind of horrific crime.

" I don't see why my _father _would have anything to do with who I speak to." I think they heard the ruthlessness in my voice when I said this, because they did not speak of it again.

After the tension of our conversation wore off, Mush and Race decided to teach me how to gamble. It was a rather interesting experience, although I lost a bit of money myself. I was actually concentrating so hard on my cards that I didn't even notice someone walk up to the booth beside us. It wasn't until he spoke that his presence was made known.

"Well, Well, if I had know you boys had such good lookin lady friends, I woulda stopped by Manhattan more often." Said the new kid with dark hair. He wore red suspenders and had a gold tipped cane at his side. I looked up and my blue eyes connected with his green ones, for a fleeting moment before I turned away. 

"Full house boys," I said as I spread my hand out onto the table. I could hear Race swear and Mush groan as I took the money out of the center of the table. 

"Hey Spot, how's things been up in your place ?" Jack asked as I watched them spit in there hands and then shake. 

"Slow, very slow. Me boys are gettin restless. Hardly makin a living as it is, but we get by. Although I see ya must be movin up, hangin with the big boys now. Ay, Jackyboy." The kid named Spot looked down at me and smirked rather unpleasantly. He reached out a hand in greeting. "Me names Spot," I hesitantly shook his hand. I got an uneasy feeling in my stomach when our arms touched.

"He's from…" Mush began but I put up a hand to stop him.

"Let me guess," I said. I turned and looked at Spot more closely. "I'm very good at these kind of things. Now lets see…From your rough accent and scruffy misdemeanor. You must be from _Brooklyn._" I replied mimicking his accent and the boys laughed. 

I had known a young girl from Brooklyn once. She had been staying in our house for a few days as a favor to her father. So in return to the favor, she stole my mothers favorite diamond necklace and got away with it. I did not like this Spot Conlon any more than I liked Brooklyn itself.

"As a madda a fact, I am," Spot said as he stood up straight, hooking his thumbs behind his suspenders. Then he leaned forward and whispered rather seductively into my ear. "You should stop by sometime, sweetheart. Gotta nice view of the riva." Jack snorted into his drink and I could feel Racetrack tense up beside me. I tilted my head and looked up into the fierce eyes of my contender. While starring I could not help but notice the many attractive features that he possessed. But that weakness was quickly hidden away.

Spot was more on the shorter side, around the same height as myself. At first sight he would seem harmless but his fierce persona and deep glare made him rather intimidating to most. I also knew by his conceded tone of voice that he had not been turned down very often by many other women. So it would come as quite a shock to everyone, when I smiled and said "I'm just fine here thanks."

It was exactly as I thought. I looked over at Racetrack and he seemed rather relieved that I had declined Spots offer. Not that I would have been able to except in the first place. What would I tell my parents. "Sorry mamma, papa but I'm leaving school and going to Brooklyn with some hoodlum that I met in a restaurant." Things like that just were not done. Besides I knew that Spots offer was for more than just a tour of his neighborhood. He was bad news and I wanted nothing more to do with him. 

But when I turned my gaze back onto Spot, he looked rather shocked. It seemed like hours sitting there starring back at him. I could see the ongoing battle he was fighting with himself. I confused Spot and it gave me ever bit of the satisfaction that I needed. But his confusion soon turned to anger and I had cringed at the coldness in his voice when he spoke. 

"Suit ya self, dollface. Your type aint welcome in my territory anyway. Even if ya were, ya wouldn't be able to handle Brooklyn. Besides your to high class for us. Makes me mouth taste all funny to even think of it." Spot replied spitting on the ground in front of me. I put a hand on Racetracks chest to prevent him from attacking Spot. I clutched my fists as I felt the anger boiling up inside me. I mean who did this kid think he was? The smile that was on my face only moments before, was gone. I glared up at Spot with every ounce of hate that I possessed.

Before Racetrack could stop me, I stood up quickly and became, nose to nose with Spot. I could feel his warm breath on my face and it made me a little uneasy. "Oh don't worry Spotty, I'm rather pleased you find me so distasteful. It makes it alot easier on myself. Considering I could find a better companion in a dog!" I screamed, my voice dripping with venom. Before he could answer I wiped around facing the boys at the table, who starred back at me open mouthed. "I'll see you around Race," I said before I shoved passed Spot and walked out the door.

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So here are my thank you's from the Prologue and Chapter One:

Splashey: I am really glad you like my character. I am trying to make her as fun/risky as I can. But not so much that I loose sight of reality. Considering that back in those days, women really didn't have many rights. I want it made clear that Hanna was practically breaking rules, acting the way that she did. So to keep in touch with the times of the story I have to put a limit on her persona. But its hard since I live in 2004. I am just so glad you are enjoying my story and please review this chapter and let me know what you think.

Bookey Elliot: Thank you for giving me advice on my story. I am open to any advice that could be given since this in my first Newsies fan fiction story. But like one of my other reviewers informed me. There were cars in that time, they just were very, very rare and only owned by the extremely wealthy. Which fits into my story, so I decided not to go back and change it. But like I said before, thanks for the advice and I'm glad you enjoy it.

StupidChocolateGirl: Thank you! I can't say it enough, how much my readers opinions mean to me. It makes me happy to know that there are people out there who enjoy my writing. 

Raeghann: I am so happy that you read my story, considering I adore your work so much. Thanks for letting me know that there were cars in that time. I wasn't sure if there was. I haven't really written anything that has to do with history before. So its hard to keep all the facts straight. Well here is the next chapter. If you can, let me know what you think. 

MorningDew: Thank you so much. I still can't get used to taking complements because I don't see myself as that great of a writer. So it means a lot when people enjoy my work. I know that it isn't that original of a plot, but it will be different, I promise. I already have the next few chapters written and things change. So I hope that you keep reading.


	4. Punishment

*Here is chapter 3. I really enjoyed writing this, it's a big turning point in the story. I'm glad I had already written this though because I'm so sick right now that its hard to even type. I also want to apologize for all of the previous and future spelling/grammar/tense mistakes that I will make in this story. I type so fast that I make a lot of mistakes and when I read over it I miss allot of them. Please keep reading, and tell me what you think*

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from Newsies. Although I wish I did. I do however own everyone else that you never heard of before.

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Chapter Three 

It was Sunday and two days had passed since that offal occurrence in the restaurant. I have tried to keep myself busy at school, but somehow my mind kept sweeping back to those cold blue eyes. The pure power and arrogance that radiated off of Spot Conlon sent shivers down my spine. He was a born leader, any who looked upon him could tell. Proud and strong, those who followed him did it not because of fear but more out of intimidation and blatant respect.

I could feel the anger once again rising in my chest at the mere thought of him. Spot was everything I had been taught to stay away from. I was trained to marry only the best. Men who had parents and proper educations, men who would go somewhere in life. Not a boy who had been raised on the streets of Brooklyn and sold newspapers for a living. But that was beside the point.

"Oh, Hanna! Are you alright? I have never in all my years, known someone as crude and vulgar as that boy!" Julia had said when she followed me back to school that day. I just nodded my head as rage prevented me to speak my mind. 

As I look back now shame washes over me when I think of how I had behaved. My mother would have died of shock had she seen me screaming at that boy. A waste of there money is was. Considering this school was here to teach me manors and how precisely to act in such circumstances. 

I did not know what had come over me. Between Spots improper comments and that conceded smirk of his, I had lost all sense of decency. When you are raised in a well-to do society, men wouldn't dare raise there voice to a lady. Let alone show such disgrace as to spit at there feet. But I had not been dealing with men, they where poor orphan boys, hoodlums. Kids who have spent there entire lives scrounging for food because people like my parents, are to selfish to share.

Deep down I knew that all of my anger was not coming from his atrocious display towards me, but more from the fact that I understood why Spot Conlon had every right to despise me. I was the prodigy of resentment that flowed through his veins. In his eyes I cared nothing for the hardships he nor his friends had to face everyday. Why should he show me respect when I have shown him none? 

I hated myself for being so gullible and letting my ignorance get in the way of my judgment. I took advantage of the fact that the Manhattan newsies were much more forgiving. Making me forget that they were not the only victims of pure selfishness. All throughout New York there were kids living on the street. Not all of them would except me as a decent women, for some of them have never known one. 

I laid there on my back, starring up at the stone ceiling of my room. The sun has barely risen in the sky and the candle on my bedside table had flickered out only moments before. I let my mind carry me away, trying to clean the wound in my soul that was left from Spots harsh words. It wasn't until a soft nock on the large oak door, brought me back to reality.

"Who is it?" I asked politely, my voice slightly groggy from sleep. I stood up and walked over to my dresser where I had took out a light cotton robe. I threw it quickly over my nightgown and tied it around my waste.

"It is Mrs. Umberg, may I please come in?" spoke of voice, soft and stern. I quickly ran over and opened the door. Mrs. Umberg is the head of house for the first year students and I wondered why she was standing at my doorway so early in the morning.

"Of course," I said moving to the side as she floated gracefully into the room. Her dark brown hair was tied up into a rather complicated design and was adorned by a hat that matched the deep blue embroidery on her dress. She looked around the room and then smiled at me softly. I smiled awkwardly in return. 

"You have one of the nicer rooms, Hanna." Mrs. Umberg said as a far away daze came over he eyes. "I remember the room I had been placed in my first year at this school. It smelled of rotten cabbage and moldy wood." I laughed slightly, not sure as to whether it was appropriate or not. I did not wish to sound anxious but I knew she did not come here merely to discuss my living quarters.

"May I ask why you have come to call upon me?" I could not help it. My curiosity was getting the better of me.

"Oh yes," Mrs. Umberg said and her eyes seemed to sadden. Suddenly a cold sweat came over me. Something was wrong, I just knew it. She paused for a few moments and then spoke hastily. "Just get dressed child, you will be meeting with the headmistress. I will return in four minutes time." She spoke no more and quickly walked out the door, shutting it behind her.

The first thing that came to my mind was that someone had caught me and Julia sneaking out. But then I realized that if it were true, we would have gotten in trouble ages ago. Whoever had seen us surely would not have waited two days to tell. Yet if it was not because of that, then what could possible be important enough to alert the headmistress.

I did not have much time to think about it, for I had to get ready quickly. I took out a dress made of violet twill and cream colored flannel, that was adorned with heavy lace. It was a dress my mother gave me as a gift before I came to school. I twisted my hair into soft curls and pulled it back with a purple silk ribbon. As soon as I was finished tying the bow, Mrs. Umberg returned. 

She did not speak and I followed her down the dreary hallways and up many flights of stairs, until we finally reached a hallway with red carpet. On the walls hung pictures of old headmistress from many years before, since the school had been founded. All of them looked just as stern and prudent as the current one. At the end of the hallway there was a large oak door that I know leads into the office, even though I have never been in there myself.

Mrs. Umberg opened the door and I noticed that her hands were trembling as she did so. Inside was one of the most extravagant rooms I had ever seen. With deep blue carpet and velvet tapestries, that matched the chairs which sat in front of a large wooden desk. 

Sitting behind the desk, with her hands folded, was a very old women. But even with her somewhat fragile exterior, there was an aura about her that commanded obedience. Her gray hair was in a tight bun on the back of her head and her lips pressed into a frown. 

"You must be Hanna Grimmuald," the old women stated confidently. Looking me over with what seemed to me as pity.

"Yes, headmistress." I replied shakily as I curtsied in the proper fashion. Of course, my mothers lessons haven't completely gone to vain. I know of how to speak, walk and talk like the best of them. But I remained worlds apart in spirit. 

"Sit down child, I am afraid we have some rather distressing news." Even though I guessed that something was wrong, her words frightened me more than anything I have felt before.

I walked over and took a seat in one of the chairs. Only then did I notice the police officer who sat in the chair to my right. _What was a police officer doing here?_ I wondered confused. Surely he couldn't be here to arrest me. Even though fear consumed my very being, I forced myself to speak. 

"What is it? What is wrong?" I asked and the police officer looked away solemnly shaking his head. I turned to Mrs. Umberg who did the same. By now the silence was killing me more than the fear of what had happened. Suddenly the headmistress spoke, but her voice was low and I had to strain to listen.

"There was a fire," she said and I remained confused. "It was your home Hanna. It had burned down during the night." Even though it was distressful news a wave a relief washed over me. 

"Oh, it is alright. We have a summer house in Virginia, we could live there until my father finds another suitable house in New York." I spoke confidently now. It was as if a huge weight has be lifted from my shoulders. My father has been saving up money for years, we were planning on moving to a larger house anyway. But as I saw the headmistress and the cop exchange saddened looks, I knew that it wasn't all. "What is it? Why will you not speak to me? Something is wrong, I wish to know what it is!" My voice was rising now, as the anger took control. I could hear Mrs. Umberg sobbing behind me and then a painful reality hit. Even as I listened to the Headmistress speak, she seemed to be a mile away.

"It was your parents…they were inside the house…it was to late to save them before the roof collapsed." My mind went into a blank. All I could feel was my heart pounding in my chest and the soft puff of air as I breathed. Surely this was some kind of joke, or maybe a punishment. I felt like I had accidentally drank to much wine at a party. Dizzy and sick to my stomach, I got to my feet. 

Sweat was pouring down my face and I grabbed the chair to steady myself. My whole body was shaking uncontrollably now. The cop stood up to help me. But I stepped away quickly, knocking over a lamp. 

"You must calm yourself, Hanna." I heard the headmistress speak softly. But I didn't want to hear her voice anymore. I didn't want to hear anything. All I wanted was to wake up in my own bed and find that it was all a dream. But it wasn't a dream, it was my worst nightmare. 

I could not help but feel as if I was watching the scene from somewhere else. As I saw myself running out the door, down the many flights of stairs and out onto the front lawn of the school. I could hear the heavy footsteps of the cop behind me, but I wouldn't stop. I dashed behind the building and through the crack in the fence. I didn't know where I was going to go, but as long as it was anywhere but there.

I pushed past people on the street and could hear there angry comments as they yelled after me. But I didn't stop, I wouldn't stop until I was far away from that school. Muddy water splattered the bottom of my dress as my feet stomped into puddles. The ribbon in my hair had long blown out and my curls were left in tangles. Soon I could feel the pain in my chest, as every breath I took felt like daggers. But I wouldn't stop, I just kept running. 

I ran around a corner and then _Smack_, I crashed head first into what felt like a brick wall. But when I looked up groggily, I was shocked to see that it was Mush that I had ran into. He seemed equally as shocked to see me. Especially in the pitiful state that I was in. I watched as he knelt down in front of me, sitting the papers beside him.

"Are you alright?" I heard him speak kindly. I noticed something different in his voice this time and when I looked down at the newspaper, I figured out what it was. Mush knew what had happened, all the newsies did. I turned away in shame and climbed to my feet. Shaking away the hand he offered to help.

"No," I spoke softly shaking my head. Somehow seeing the picture of my house in flames, made everything seem all the more real.

My head was spinning and I started to wobble on my feet. Mush stepped closer but I backed away. I didn't need his help. This was my punishment for disobeying my parents. I had put them to shame and now they would never come back. All because I had wanted freedom from a life I had taken advantage of. I guess it was true what they say. That you never know how much you love something until its gone.

I heard footsteps behind me and turned around quickly to see Racetrack. He stopped when he saw me and pain filled his eyes. I continued to stare at him, but soon everything started to get fuzzy. I saw him fading into darkness and the ground came up to meet me excruciatingly fast. When I felt strong arms wrap around my waist and lift me into the air, I lost complete conciseness altogether.

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Thank you's:

Ash: I'm glad you like my story. I know, I am horrible (and I repeat, horrible) at spelling and grammar. Also with past and present tense stuff. Once I get an idea for a chapter I write it so fast that I make a lot of mistakes. I know that bothers a lot of people and I apologize. I wish I could say that there won't be any more mistakes, but that won't ever happen. So I'm sorry but I hope you still will enjoy my story.

Splashey: Yep trust me, there will be a lot more rivalry to come. I didn't want to write a story where Spot and Hanna get along right at the beginning, because I wanted to stress the difference in there personalities and lives. Plus it wouldn't be as interesting if there wasn't a little bit of a conflict. Of course she learned to gamble. I love Race's character and there will be a lot more of him in the story. But I am not going to reveal any secrets. So I'll keep my mouth shut for now. Keep reading and I hope you enjoy the next few chapters as much as you have been.

Coin: Thanks for the compliment. Don't worry, I am trying to make my story as original as possible. Even if the plot has been used multiple times before. I hope you continue to read and like I told my other reviewers I am sorry for all of the spelling, grammer and mistakes that I make with tenses. I have always had problems with those things. 

Raeghann: Thanks for the offer. If I have any questions I will be sure to ask you. I'm glad you like the way I characterized Spot. It gets hard sometimes writing the story and still trying to keep him in character at the same time. I hope you liked this chapter. It took me a little bit to write this, because I knew where I wanted to take the story but how to start it was confusing me. 

Emotions: You don't understand how happy I am that you decided to read my story and that you enjoyed it. It means a lot to me when someone tells me something like that. Thanks for the compliment, I really appreciate it. Well I hope you liked this chapter also. Let me know what you think!

Luv 

Leila3


	5. Nickname

*Hey everyone, just so you know. It was taking me a little while because I had wen't over the last few chapters and corrected a few things. So that my new readers don't see all my mistakes. But anyway, here is the next chapter. I hope you like it and remember I love to know what you think. So remember to review, your opinions mean a lot to me. Also just so you know. For the next chapter or two (mainly next chapter) if Hanna seems a little bit emotional, remember its because her parents just died. I can't just have her parents die and she act like nothings wrong. Besides it helps bring her together with the boys. Well go ahead and read, remember to review!!!*

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the settings or characters from the newsies. Although I wish I did *grin*. Anyway everything else that you don't recognize it my own. 

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Chapter Four

I found myself waking up the next day in an unfamiliar room. I was wrapped up in a rough wool blanket and could feel the metal springs jab into my back from the old mattress. My head ached profusely and the muscles in my legs throbbed painfully every time that I moved. 

I sat up quickly and looked around. Lying at the foot of the bed was Mush, his head was in his arms and he was sleeping soundly. In a chair to the right was Race, who by the looks of it, had been laying in a rather awkward position with his feet hanging off to the side. While I sat starring down at the boys relaxing figures, I began to recall every bit of the day before and choked back a sob. I wouldn't cry, I would be strong for myself. I knew that if I broke down now, there would have be no returning. 

"Ay, she's awake!" I heard someone yell from the left. I cringed at the loudness of there voice. My head felt as if someone was pounding on it with a hammer. I looked over and standing in the doorway was a small dark skinned boy. I remembered him from that day at the restaurant. 

"Whatta ya tryin ta do Boots, give her a heart attack," Jack said as he appeared in the doorway. 

"Sorry," the kid replied quietly. 

This was all to much for me to handle. I groaned and laid back down on the pillow. But Boots had obviously awoken the others. Because I closed my eyes for a moment and when I opened them Mush was towering above me, looking down. His curly brown hair stuck up in odd places and there were dark circles under his eyes. I could tell just by looking at him that he hadn't gotten much sleep the night before.

"Ya scared me half ta death, ya know. Just passing out on the street like dat." Mush commented but there was a hint of sympathy in his voice. I smiled up at him apologetically to say I was sorry. But I think that it resembled more of a cringe than anything. I returned to a sitting position once more as the dizziness resided. 

Racetrack by then was awake and alert. He too looked as if he hadn't gotten much sleep. I turned to him and asked "Where am I?" 

Race cleared his throat and then answered. "Your at da Newsies Lodging House. We didn't know were else to take ya." I nodded my head in understanding. So this was where they all lived.

"We know it aint up to your standards and everything. But were not used to having people like yourself here. Just us most of da time." Jack said. If it had been a day like any other, that comment would have angered me. But somehow petty little comments like that didn't bother me anymore.

"I don't really think I have too many standards Jack…well at least not anymore." The situation had become rather uncomfortable and it was getting worse by the minute.

"Well I talked to Kloppman and he says ya can stay till ya find ya'self another place to go. As long as ya don't cause any problems. Some of da boys, dey pitched in to pay your first weeks rent. But unless ya gots money stored somewhere you may be sellin papes with the rest of us." Jack finished and starred down at me like an over affirmative older brother. I nodded my head to signify that I understood and he then turned to walk away.

"Thanks," I replied and Jack stopped for a moment before leaving.

Mush had taken a seat down at the end of the bed by my feet and Racetrack joined him. "Is Jack always so serious?" I asked them.

"Sometimes, only when he gots lots of things ta think about. Besides he probably feels kinda uncomfortable. Since we aint never really had a girl around here before." Race replied. 

"So ya gunna stay or not?" Mush broke in and asked. I laughed to myself, he did always seem to have a way of removing the tension in a conversation. 

"Well, I may have to return to school. At least to get my belongings. They will no longer allow me to attend my classes of course. Since my parents…since the school will no longer be receiving any payment." Oh what a pity, I thought to myself, looking down at my hands. "But yeah Mush, I guess I will be staying. At least until I find out what the city is going to do with me."

"Good, cuz, you see. Me and Race, we already talked to the boys. They promise to leave ya alone." I laughed, but it felt rather strange. Because there wasno feeling in it. I think the boys must have noticed it to, because they shifted uncomfortably in there seats. 

"Yeah and if they don't. Just let us know and we'll soak em for ya," Racetrack said. I hadn't exactly understood what that meant. But I got the hint when Race pounded his fist into his hand. 

"Thanks," I said once more. 

"But…if ya do end up stayin. There are a few rules you gotta follow." Mush said and I listened intently. "At night ya gotta stay in your room. We can't have ya roaming around while we are sleepin. Not that we don't trust ya, its just that we don't know you all dat well." 

"I understand," I said and he continued.

"Second, you will hafta wait in the morning to use the bathroom. Cuz as much as we like ya and all. I don't think some of the boys would want you walkin in on us when we are changin." I nodded my head once more to signify that I agreed with the rules. 

"That's fair enough. But I have some conditions of my own." 

"Well what are they?" Race asked.

"I don't want anyone to just walk in here whenever they feel like it. Nock first and wait till I tell you that its ok to come in. Second, I want it made perfectly clear. That I will not tolerate any boys sleep walking and _accidentally_ winding up in my room. Because as much as I trust you two…I don't trust them." Mush and Race grinned widely at my comment but then nodded. I held out my hand to each of them. "Agreed?"

"Agreed," they responded in unison.

After we shook hands Mush said goodbye and left. He was going to try and make an early start that day. All that remained was me and Racetrack. I turned to him. "Why are guys doing this for me?" I asked confused. 

"I don't rightly know," He replied truthfully. I looked down at my hands, feeling rather dejected. Race paused for a moment and then continued. "But I think its cuz we know you's a good girl. Trust me when I tell ya, see… Jack, he don't take in nobody. We survive cuz we look out for ourselves and eachotha. But you ain't like da others. You treat us wit respect an that's more en I can say for da rest of um." 

It felt like a slap in the face as I listened to his words about me treating them with respect. If Race had only known the thoughts that had been running through my head the first day I met them. I hadn't seen them as normal people, just lowly street boys who were worth nothing more than a good time.

"Race…I don't deserve your respect." I stated about ready to cry. "I'm no different than the rest of them. I don't deserve it." I tried to stand up off the bed but Race grabbed my arm forcefully.

"You are different," He said. But I refused to listen. I know that I was acting irrational. My mind was overrun with emotion and it was become increasingly harder to remain calm. 

I just stood there and shook my head frantically as I gave up trying to get free. "No, I'm not. Race you don't understand. I hate my life! I hate everything about it. The people, the places, even the sounds. But most of all, I hate myself. I hate the way they made me into something that I'm not. I have been fighting my entire existence just to remain myself, but they corrupted me anyway." By then I had begun pacing the room. Race didn't say anything, he just sat and listened, for that I was grateful. Besides I don't think he wanted to jump into the middle of a battle I was having with myself. 

I finally stopped pacing and turned to him. "I know that I don't have any right to be complaining to you. I mean look at your life. To you, my life must look like heaven. But I'll tell you this Race, its hard on both sides of the track."

He just nodded his head in agreement. I knew that Race probably thought I was insane, but he just listened anyway. "I realize now, that you and me, were not really all that different. For instance, everybody looks down on you because your…um…" I thought about how I could explain this without insulting him.

"Poor," Racetrack replied and then smirked.

"Yeah well, lets just say underprivileged. But you see… high class people, they don't care how you got there. They just look at your way of life and decide that it somehow brands you as lower than themselves. Because their up there sitting all high and mighty in there large extravagant houses while you remain here having to fight everyday just to survive."

Race took out a cigar from his pocket and leaned up against the bed post. "That's true…" he said nodding.

" But I would rather have a hard life…than no life at all. When your rich Race, every day you have someone breathing down your neck, telling you that everything your doing is wrong. Your friends, teachers and parents," I paused for a moment. But then I got my composure back. If I could just make him understand, there would be some purpose to my meaningless rambling. 

"The moment you are brought into this world they begin to drill into your brain how to walk, talk and eat, properly. They try to shape you into the perfect human being. You try to fight to remain and individual, but you don't want to disappoint those who care for you. So you give up and eventually…" I picked up a stick off the table and twirled it around in my fingers. "They _Break _you." I snapped the stick over my knee and threw the pieces into the corner. "And you become just another part of the crowd."

"But you aint just anotha part of da crowd. Like I said before…" Race stood up straight and walked over to me. He had put his hands on my shoulders and forced me to sit down in a chair. "Look dollface, Ya different than them. Because you gave us the time a day. Do ya think any of dem woulda. Take ya friend for example, she practically fainted when ya started talkin ta me at Tibbys. But you didn't care. That didn't stop ya, because your different." I just sat there and took in everything that Racetrack had just said. He was right of course and in my mind I knew it. But I know it would be a matter of time before I made my heart believe. I looked up at Race and gave him a real genuine smile. 

All of a sudden Jack appeared in the doorway to the room, "So dollface, ya up to sellin papes wit us today." I looked over at him and Jack raised a questioning eyebrow. Then I looked back at Racetrack who seemed to be slightly anxious, as he continued to puff on his cigar.

"Oh, alright!" I gave up and threw my hands in the air. I still felt as if I was about to fall apart. But I knew that sitting in a room, wallowing in my own self pity, would do me no good. I think some people may find me to be cold and unfeeling but I was far from it. Outside I was as hard as a rock, but inside my heart was slowly breaking.

I think the reason that I have been able to act so calmly, may be due to the fact that I have spent four weeks apart from my parents. I haven't seen them or spoken to them because the school didn't permit visiting hours for the first years. It may have been because the full force of what really happened, hasn't hit me yet. Right then, it just felt like my parents were still back at home and I was just waiting until the end of the month before I could see them again.

Race reached out a helping hand and I took it gratefully. He pulled me to my feet and I walked with him out of what seemed to be a back room and into one of a significantly larger size. The walls were lined with multiple bunk beds and clothes laid sprawled around on the dull wooden floor. Most of the beds were empty but here and there boys were sitting around, smoking and gambling. When we walked into the room, they all looked up. A kid who was about two inches taller than myself and had a patch over his right eye, walked up to us. I remember hearing someone call him Kid Blink.

"Hey Race, feel like spotting me a two-bit? Lost of bet to Skittery last night, so I aint got no money for papes taday." I looked over at Race who put a hand under his chin and thought about it for a moment. Then he reached into his back pocket and flipped a coin into Blinks hand. 

"Dis is the last time I'm lendin any of ya chumps money. Ya hear!" All of the boys nodded with wide grins on there faces. From the looks of it, this had not been the first time they had heard this threat before. 

Blink was about to leave when he turned to me and tipped his hat. "How ya doin doll face?" he asked.

"Fine thanks," I replied casually. Then a young boy around four years old ran up to me, holding out a piece of paper.

"Dolly, Dolly, Do ya know how ta write? I need ta send a letta to me mudda, but none of da boys will write it for me. So dey said I should ask you." I helped the little boy named Jumper, write the letter to his mother. Then returned to Racetracks side. 

"Do none of these kids know my name?" I asked him quietly. He just shook his head and then laughed. 

"Well I guess ya got yourself a nickname. Welcome to da club." Race patted me on the back and then walked down the stairs.

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Emotions: Thank you so much, I am glad you enjoy my writing style. It's means a lot to me when you compliment me on my writing. But then I go back and re-read the story and I find all these mistakes. It's because I am really critical of myself. Yeah I was trying to make this chapter sad, so that you could sort of picture how she was feeling. I don't know what I would do if I lost my parents either. I can't say it enough, thank you again for your compliments.

CiCi: thanks bunches for the compliment. I am glad you are enjoying my story. I was so happy when I found out people really appreciate my work, that I was like jumping around my house singing. I guess I answered your question about whether they were going to take Hanna to the lodging house. I figured that it was a good way to get her more involved with the newsies.

NadaZimri: Thanks *hugs* I love getting good reviews. It helps to keep me motivated to write. When I don't get reviews I start to slack off. But Yes, I too love good angst stories. I mean I cant help putting in a little bit of drama. There would be no feeling in it if I didn't. Here is my update. I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as you had the other ones.

Splashey: Urgh! I hate it when ff.net says that it is experiencing heavy traffic. That does that to me all the time. But I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. Its good that you felt bad for Hanna, because that means that I did my job at making it sad. Sometimes I'm not very good at creating a very depressing moment. But I hope that I did alright. Anyway here is the next chapter. I hope that you enjoyed it.

Elvenrarehunter: Well I'm glad that I have one more person that likes the story. I hope you liked this chapter as much as you had the other ones. I feel bad if I disappoint people. Even though this chapter was just to get her more equated with the boys. I hope you continue reading and let me know what you think.

Coin: Yes, I love drama. Wouldn't be a good story if there wasn't a little bit of feeling in it. Hope you liked the new chapter, review and let me know.

Patch530: Well here is the next chapter. What did you think? There wasn't a fight in this chapter with Spot and Hanna, but don't worry I have a couple things planned out. Not next chapter but soon, I promise. 

Bookey Elliot: It's ok about the whole car thing. You were just trying to help and I really appreciate that. I'm not very good with historical stuff, one of my other reviewers told me about that. But I'm glad you liked the next few chapters and I hope you liked this one as well. Review whenever you can and let me know what you think.

Thanks once again, *hugs*

Leila3 


	6. Break Down

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*Here is my next chapter. This is kind of an emotional chapter. It took me awhile to write it and I know that there are some spelling mistakes, but I tried. I hope you enjoy this chapter it was hard to write. I am just so happy that I am getting such a big response out of my readers. Keep reviewing and I hope to hear from you soon.*

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

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Chapter Five

The day was cold and dreary, which was a perfect comparison to my mood at the time. There wasn't a sign of the sun to be seen anywhere in the eastern sky and I shivered as I walked down the street with Jack by my side. He was carrying a stack of papers in his left arm and held a cigarette up to his mouth with the right. Racetrack was stalking behind us hollering out the headlines to the people. He normally sold his papers alone but today he would make an exception. I actually found it to be a very interesting business, selling papers and a hard one at that.

Yet the hardest part for me came when I had to start blocking out the voices of the other newsies on the streets as they screamed "Fatal Fire Kills Two Unsuspecting Citizens." Jack and Racetrack tried to keep me occupied most of the time and I was grateful. But soon my feet began to burn with lack of rest and a soft rain started to fall making my ears numb from the cold. 

It wasn't until the sun started setting, that I really began to feel exhausted. Jack had long been through with selling his papers and Race had just gotten rid of his last one. So we were on our way back to the Lodging House when the rain began to pour down hard.

"Come on, we only gots anudda block ta go," Jack yelled back to me. It was hard to hear his voice as the wind carried it away through the rooftops. By now the clouds had completely covered up the sun and an early night had befallen us. I could barely see Racetrack walking only a few feet in the distance and yelled for him to slow down, but my voice wasn't strong enough to be heard.

So every time there was a flash of lighting I followed the outline of there retreating figures. Yet each time they seemed to get farther and farther away. Until I couldn't see them at all. I knew that the Lodging House was near by, so I continued to walk forward a little faster. It wasn't until I came upon a park where the road split into three different directions, that fear hit me hard. I was lost. So in a desperate attempt not to panic I decided to look down each road individually and see if anything familiar stood out. 

I had never in all my life felt as horrible as I did now. The water was soaking through my shoes and my dress looked brown instead of purple from the mud. But I wouldn't give up hope. I had walked over to the road on the right and squinted my eyes to see. There was a bright flash of lighting which alit the buildings around me but nothing looked familiar. So I stumbled over to the left road and repeated the same procedure. My heart filled with joy as I located Tibby's dinner in the distance. But it only served to remind me that the lodging house wasn't in that direction. So with only one more road to check, I turned around quickly as a flash of lighting hit. 

My heart stopped for a moment and the breath caught in my lungs, as I stood looking up at an extremely large creature towering above me. It wasn't until I heard it neigh that I realized it was a horse. Screaming loudly, I fell backwards into the mud. I barely had time to roll out of the way when one of its hooves landed hard on my shoulder. I cried out in pain and tried to move but I seemed to be temporarily paralyzed with fear.

I knew in my mind that no normal person would ever be out walking the streets in this weather. So it came as quite a surprise to me when two strong hands grabbed my forearms and pulled me backwards. A sharp jab of pain pulsated throughout my entire right side and tears started falling from my eyes. Another flash of lighting hit and I could see that on the road in front of me, there was a man driving a horse and carriage.

"Get outta my way ya cruddy street rats," The old man hollered at us as he hit the horse hard with the reins and continued on his way. 

I didn't know what was worse. The stinging sensation from the wound in my shoulder or the pain from dejection that had just began to overwhelm my entire being. I was stuck on the streets, dirty, lost and completely alone. How could so much happen to a person, in so short a time?

Wait, but I wasn't alone. Someone had pulled me out of the way of that horse. I turned around urgently to see my savior but they had vanished. The rain continued to fall and I refused to look at my shoulder, afraid of what I would see. My mind remained on the face of that old man and how he had driven away without a seconds glance, not even to see if I was alright. 

I looked around and could see people inside buildings taking shelter from the rain. Those who saw me looked down through the glass repulsively. They didn't know it but I had once been a part of there crowd. But I was lost to them now. This was the new me, the old me had died in that fire along with my parents.

The wind began to blow and I just sat in the middle of the muddy street in a slight stupor. I didn't care if another carriage came, I didn't care about anything anymore. My skin became pale and cold. I knew that if I didn't get out of the rain I would soon get hypothermia. But my muscles refused to move. Actually I think a part of me wanted to die at that moment, just to stop the suffering.

I could feel the warm liquid running down my right arm and chest, soaking through my dress. I tried to move my fingers but all I got was a numbing sensation and a jab of pain. Another gust of wind came and a soggy, wet newspaper blew onto the street in front of me. I looked down sorrowfully and starring up at me was the New York World. The cover page was adorned with the black and white photograph of my house on the night that it burned to the ground. 

What right did they have? How could they just go around announcing it to the whole city like it was some kind of spectacle? People die everyday and no one cares about them. But when its someone of high class the story gets posted on the front page of every tabloid from here to Harlem.

A fit of rage took hold of me and I slammed my fist down hard into the ground. I didn't deserve this…no one did. Yet as I saw the handsome picture of my father starring up at me, I couldn't help telling myself that my parents were somehow to blame for this whole ordeal. They had been there my entire life, telling me what to do and how to live. Yet now when I needed them the most they had to go and leave me forever. What made them think that I could possible handle living my life without them? What made them think that I was strong enough?

My salty tears were mixed with rain as I clutched the crinkled newspaper in my left hand. The fact that I had begun to blame my parents for there own deaths, made me sick to my stomach. I knew that the situation I was in, was my own fault and no one else's. For the longest time I had wanted freedom from a life that billions of kids would have given up everything for. Now here I was, free to do as I wished and all I wanted was to be back in the arms of my mother. 

I was so occupied with my own mournful thoughts that I didn't even realize I had begun to weep openly. Two minutes had passed and I had lost complete feeling in my right arm. Each raindrop felt like an ice cold sowing needle that was pricking me all over my body. I must have been a pitiful sight to see, sobbing hysterically in the middle of the muddy street, bruised and beaten in more ways than one. When a few boys came up and surrounded me. I wasn't afraid, but I still felt a hint of relief when a familiar voice spoke. It was Racetrack. 

I couldn't look up, nor could I halt the tears that fell freely down my pale cheeks as he walked slowly over to my side. It was as if I could feel his presence as he knelt down beside me. I shivered as his warm hand touch mine own. Race gently pried opened my fingers and took the newspaper out of my clutches. I tilted my head and looked up at him. 

"Are you alright?" he asked and even through the darkness I could see the worry and concern on his face. I shook my head no as even more tears welled up in my eyes. I could hear the boys around us whispering and wondered what they thought of me now. 

I knew that Race wanted to talk to me, but this was not the place nor the time. So instead he reached out a hand, offering me his assistance. Forgetting about my injury I tried to move my right arm and screamed loudly. Finally realizing that I was hurt, Race yelled to another kid, who quickly hurried over. 

I recognized the curly haired boy immediately, it was Mush and he looked even more concerned than Race did. Mush didn't speak but instead he put an arm around my back and hauled me to my feet. I steadied myself for a moment, as the dizziness went away. But as I tried to stand on my own, I quickly realized that I practically had no control over my own legs and found myself falling to the ground once more. Mush put his arms under my legs and lifted me into the air. I leaned my head against his chest and mumbled slowly. "We have to stop meeting like this!"

That was the last thing that anyone said until we made it back to the Lodging House. Race held the door open for Mush to carry me inside. Sitting around in the entrance way was fourteen of the boys who had been, by the looks of it, drying off after a hard days work. They starred up bewildered at us when we arrived. I seen Jack rush over and surprisingly he looked concerned. 

"Is she alright?" he asked and Race shrugged his shoulders. 

"Well she took a bad beatin from dat horse. Lucky I came along or it woulda trampled her ta death." This came from a loud cocky voice from the corner. The air caught in my lungs as I looked sideways to see Spot sitting next to Boots at a wooden table. I think I must have looked pretty bad because he didn't meet my eyes.

I felt about ready to pass out. The fact that it had been Spot Conlon who had saved me, only added to my confusion. Mush set me down carefully but still supported me with one arm.

"I don't…" chocking on my words, I continued. "I didn't need your help!" I said forcefully to the Brooklyn leader. That crude smirk that I hated appeared on his lips and I prepared myself for his arrogant response. But it never came, after a long pause he spoke.

"Sure Doll, whateva ya say." 

I don't know why but his lack of a reply seemed to let me down slightly. I was in dire need of something or someone to take my frustrations out on and this had seemed like the perfect opportunity. I would have loved to scream at Spot and to tell him just what I really thought of him. But no, he had to go and show is human side. How could I be angry at someone who did nothing to me? 

Yet the worst part was, I think Spot knew my intentions all along. For the next few days he would refrain from starting a confrontation with me, no matter how tedious the task, because that was exactly what I wanted and Spot couldn't let me get the better of him.

A strong gust of ice cold wind was carried in from the still open doorway as papers on the desk blew off onto the floor and I shivered slightly. My legs began to feel weak again and a wave of nausea washed over me. I let go of Mush and clutched my stomach tightly with my left arm. The boys backed away quickly, afraid that I would get sick. I remained in a hunched over position for at least five minute, until it passed. I stood up and wobbled backwards into the front desk. 

I couldn't figure out what was happening to me. I felt as if I was falling apart by the seams. It had only been two days before when everything in my life had been under complete control, whether by my own hand or someone else's. But now everything was shattering into a thousand pieces, including myself and I didn't know what to do to stop it. 

I let my legs give in and I slid down into a sitting position with my back against the cool hard wood. I started to breath heavy and my lungs began to burn. The mud was still dripping uncomfortably down my legs and the pain in my shoulder was unbearable. I started shivering again and this time it was hard to stop. 

"Her lips are turning blue," I heard a young voice say, but I didn't look up. Instead I laid down on my side. I didn't care about how dirty the floor was or what the others thought. My insides felt like they were slowly being torn apart and I closed my eyes trying to keep the tears from escaping. "What is she doing?" 

"Do ya think she's sleepin?" I heard Mush ask.

"Nah! She mighta passed out like she did before." All the boys began to talk at once. I wanted to open my mouth and tell them to be quiet, but I found myself incapable of doing so.

"Someone needs ta run and get the doc," I heard Jack state. A wave of relief washed over me. At least there was one kid here who knew of what they were doing.

I did not protest when I felt someone lift me into the air and carry me up the stairs. Although whomever it had been, accidentally smacked my wounded shoulder off of something hard. When I cried out, he tensed up and became more cautious.

I was in so much pain that it was hard to even think straight. I was still shivering as someone laid me down in a bed and pulled the covers up overtop of my limp body. I hated not being able to move or to speak. It was as if I was trapped inside the confinements of my mind unable to wake up from this horrific nightmare.

The muscles in my stomach began to constrict painfully and it was becoming continuously more difficult to breath. Even though I felt like I was freezing on the inside, I could feel the cold sweat pouring down my forehead. Oh, how I wished the doctor would get here soon. I didn't know how much longer I could last before I would give in and let the darkness consume me.

I felt a warm hand brush the hair out of my face and place a wet towel on my forehead. But the ache in my stomach was getting worse and every few moments a sharp jab of pain would pulsate throughout my entire body making me jerk forward. Finally the doctor arrived.

I could hear someone talking, but it became muffled and I couldn't comprehend what they were saying. After a few minutes had passed by and the discussion died down. I felt two pairs of hands grip both my arms. I tried to struggle but there was no use. Before I knew it a needle jabbed into my left arm. 

I cried out but it seemed to be no use anymore. Nothing I could do would stop the pain as it fought to take control. I felt someone remove the towel and place there hand upon my forehead. Whatever the doctor had given me in the needle, began to ease the pain slightly. 

Then I felt a hand being placed on my right shoulder where the wound from the horse was. Whomever it could be, pressed down gently on the gash and I screamed loudly. Why wouldn't they just leave me alone? I needed help and they were hurting me. Where was Race and Mush? Why wouldn't they stop this? I started crying harder. I had to get out of there, I had to get away. 

The hand on my shoulder continued to press down and hot tears rolled down my cheeks. _Please god, make the pain stop. _The tension in my lungs had only begun to multiply with each breath that I took. I knew that in my heart I didn't have the strength to keep fighting and soon my breathing would stop all together.

With the last bit of strength that I had, I forced my eyes open. Everything was blurry but I could just make out an old man standing by my bed side. It must have been the doctor. I turned my head the other way and Race was kneeling on the floor beside me. I reached out my left hand to grab his own. 

"P…please help…m..me" He grabbed my hand. Race only tightened his grip as I screamed once more and jerked forward. My entire body began to violently shake and I couldn't stop it. The old man put both hands on my shoulders and held me down firmly. I tried to hold on to what was left of my scrambled sanity. But it was no use, it would have no avail and I succumbed to the darkness that lingered forever over me.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Thanks to:

NadaZimri- I'm glad you enjoyed it. Yeah I know, I don't know how I would act if I had lost practically my entire life in one night. I guess your right about the bathroom thing. She isn't aloud to leave the room when everyone is sleeping.*cringe* that would suck not to be able to go to the bathroom. But she will just have to wait until the morning.

Coin- Thanks! I didn't want the part where she is complaining about being rich, to be to drawn out. So I'm glad that you thought it was well written. I know there are a lot of mistakes in that chapter. But I'm trying. I don't think I will ever be able to get out all of the mistakes. Well keep reading and thanks again.

Padfootismyhero- Thank you so much! Wow, I've never had such an ecstatic reviewer before and it makes me so happy. I swear you made my day when I read your review. I was in computer class at school and my friends asked me what was so great. Lol Well I hope you continue reading.

Emotions- If I do create another character in my story, I would love to use you. I'll let you know later on. But thanks again!!!

Splashey- I feel like thanks is all that I say, But I can't ever say it enough. I am glad that you like Hanna's nickname, I just thought that it fit. Considering that the Newsies didn't really know her name and most of them just called her dollface. So I figured "hey, why doesn't that just be her nickname." Yeah, Mush and Race are going to be like family to her throughout the story. Well I hope you enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think. 

Morning Dew- Well I'm very glad your back. No, I have never seen Mona Lisa Smile, although I really wanted to. I got all of that etiquette stuff, because I had to learn it in my cooking class at school. I hope you enjoyed the other chapters and this one as well.

Chris- Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it. Hanna wasn't left with nothing, I just haven't got to that part just yet. In the next chapter she finds out what her parents left her. 

Elvenrarehunter- Thanks again and I hope you continue reading. 

Lena-jade: Thanks, I'm glad you find my story interesting. Yeah I know I messed up with the numbers. I already went back over my story and corrected them. I just haven't reposted the chapters yet. Oh and there is a love triangle coming up…but not with who you think. There will be a new character coming into the story soon.

Luv ya lots,

Leila3


	7. Fate

Hey everyone, here is the next chapter. This one is kinda long and it took me awhile to write. I was going to post it sooner, but I wanted to get part of the next chapter written before I did. I like to have a few of the chapters written ahead, so that I can update soon and don't keep my reviewers waiting that long. The next chapter will be posted next Monday, so you know to expect it. I will be working on getting a few more chapters finished. Thanks so much for all of your reviews! Also I should apologies for all of the spelling mistakes ahead of time. Oh and I am going to be changing my penname to Crimson. Because that is the nickname all of my friends call me.

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

****

Chapter Six

I don't know how long I have been asleep, waking in and out of consciousness but each time I awoke there was someone different watching over me. Race and Mush were there often and Jack had stopped in a few times. I still didn't have the strength to speak but I gradually began to regain more feeling in my limbs as each day passed.

Finally after a week of bed rest, I opened my eyes and looked around. It must have been just after sunrise because the warm light shining through the window reflected a dusty red glow on the walls. I didn't know how long I laid there just starring at the ceiling of my room, thankful that I had the chance to look at it once more. For awhile during the last few days, I had gotten the feeling that I wasn't ever going to wake up.

The window on the far right wall of the room was open and the pleasant aroma of newly fallen rain floated through the air. But it was mingled with the pungent odor of cheap tobacco and musty stale cigars. I smiled softly to myself, thinking of the boys who slept soundly on the opposite side of the wooden door. I think you learn to look at the sweeter side of life after something threatens to take it away forever.

Doctor Standford informed me staunchly, that I had sustained a fractured collar bone from where the horse had kicked me. I also had a slight case of hypothermia which developed into severe pneumonia. My skin still remained pale and cold. Dr. Standford told me that for the next few days I would encounter some minor headaches due to loss of blood. If I had sat in the rain any longer that night, I may have died. Isn't that a scary thought?

After he left, I sat up and my back cracked painfully due to lack of movement. My right shoulder was wrapped up in a white sling. But most of the pain in the rest of my arm had been reduced to nothing and I was able to move my fingers once more. It took me a few minutes to rise out of bed, but eventually I managed a standing position. It felt good just to be up and able to stretch my limber body, to walk around again.

My dress had been removed and was nowhere to be seen. I was now clothed in a long white nightgown. For a few moments I wondered who had changed me, but then it passed quickly from my mind. I began to take a few steps and shivered each time my bare feet touched the cold wooden floor. But when I reached the door to the room, movement in the far left corner made me stop in my tracks.

"And where exactly do ya think your going?" said the very voice that made the hair on the back of my neck stand on end. The one thing that had haunted my dreams many nights while I had been ill. Of course I knew that it would not have had the same effect on me, had it not belonged to Spot Conlon himself. The one boy whom I detested most out of any man that I have ever known.

I turned around quickly and glared at my intruder. "What are you doing here?" I snapped curtly. But Spot seemed to be meekly effected by my response.

"Why, watchin' over you of course," he said with fake innocence.

"Well thanks, but I'm well now. So you can do me the favor of leaving." I knew that I was being harsh. But his disrespectful behavior towards me at Tibby's still boiled in my mind.

"Look Doll, Ya don't need ta get all snippy. It ain't like I'm here cuz I wanna be. I'm doin' it as a fava to Jack." He acted as if that had made it any better of an excuse. "Besides is dis how ya treat the man who saved ya life? Or did ya forget dat part?" Spot got up out of the chair and walked staunchly over to me. I backed away quickly into the wall. There was something about him that scared me. It wasn't a physical intimidation, more like an unwanted feeling that he erupted in the pit of my stomach.

"Look, Spot, or whatever your name is. Do not get me wrong. I'm very grateful for your help that night with the horse. But if you think that I am going to bow down at your feet like all the other girls that you have ever known. Then I'm very sorry but you are highly mistaken. I have more respect for myself than that." Spot looked at me with those piercing blue eyes that made my knees go weak and raised an eyebrow questioningly. Underneath his intense glare I felt my strength beginning to waver but I held strong. "So if you're looking for appreciation then I'd be glad to give it. But if your expecting something else, then I suggest you leave me be. Because you won't find anything here."

It felt as if I had spoken that statement all in one breath and once I finished, I breathed a deep sigh of relief. After the echo of my voice died down, we were left with nothing but an empty silence. Spot just stood there starring at me as if I had been something from another world. Once again I could see the battle blazing in his eyes. I knew that he had been trying to decipher whether or not to retaliate with one of his arrogant responses. Or just to say what he truly felt.

At that moment I knew everything that Spot Conlon was about, just by looking into his eyes. Because it was the same sad, diminishing shadow that I saw every time that I looked into the mirror. But unlike me, Spot had given up long ago trying to fight it.

"Look Doll, I gots lots of things ta do. An' don't worry, you ain't one of dem. I told ya before; dis is only as a fava to Cowboy, nothin' more. I swear, ya think dat every guy in New York luvs ya. Well ya're wrong." Spot said in retaliation to my accusations.

"Ha, you have room to talk! You're so conceited that it makes me sick to my stomach. You walk around here like you're the king of New York. When really all you are is a pompous, arrogant, jerk, who feels the need to get his way just by scaring people." Spot looked taken aback by my bold remarks and I knew right away that I had made a big mistake. Soon I saw the confusion in his eyes disappear and watched as it was replaced by pure outright anger.

"I don't know who ya think ya talkin' to like dat. But if I were you, I'd watch what I say. Havin' a smart mouth on da streets ain't a very attractive quality for a girl such as yaself. You may end up getting hurt, or worse killed. But ya know what? I wouldn't feel in the least bit sorry for ya. I think ya deserve to go down just like ya parents did." After he finished screaming in my face, a deadly silence fell over the room once more. Neither one of us could believe that he had just said that. My eyes filled with tears and Spot looked apologetically at me. But I was still in a state of shock. How could someone be so cold and heartless?

"I'm sorry," Spot replied as he reached a hand out to me. I could tell it had been forced by the crease in his jaw line as he clenched his teeth in aggravation. But I backed away quickly into a corner.

"Just leave me alone!" I screamed.

"I didn't mean what I said bout ya parents, ya just made me so angry." For a fleeting moment I saw pity flash in his eyes and that's when I lost all respect for him. I must have looked like a scared dog, cowering into a corner and I was ready to attack.

"You know what? Everyone else may be afraid of you, Spot Conlon. But I'm not! I see right through the mask that you hid behind and all you are is a pathetic excuse for a human being." I walked over to the door and opened it up. A few boys, who were awake, stared at us amused. I turned around and glared back at Spot. "Get out!"

He didn't say anything but just walked past me and out into the other room. Just then he turned around and went to speak.

"Doll I…" But Spot didn't get the chance to finish before I slammed the door hard in his face.

I listened to his footsteps fade and could here the faint mumble of swearing as he walked away. I slid down into a sitting position and wrapped my arms tightly around my knees. A single tear slid down my pale cheek, but I wiped it away quickly. I would not have a repeat of the night after my parents died. From now on, things would be different. I wanted my pride back. I wanted to be the person who didn't need to rely on the pity of others to survive.

I took a deep breath and got to my feet only moments before Racetrack comes storming into the room.

"Are you alright? What did he do to ya? I heard you two yellin' at eachotha and then Spot comes storming out of here swearin' like all hell." Race put his hands on my shoulders and looked at me concerned. The door to the room was left open and I could see a few of the boys looking in on us.

"I'm fine; he didn't do anything to me." I replied honestly. But Racetrack looked as if he didn't believe a word I said. "We just had a disagreement that's all."

"Yeah Race, ya shoulda heard her. I ain't never seen anyone tell Spot Conlon off like dat, not ever." Boots said as he walked over and patted me on the shoulder. "Ya shoulda heard some of da stuff she said ta him. I'm surprised she's still standin'." I blushed slightly and then shrugged it off as if it was no big deal.

"Your right Boots, she is lucky." Race turned to me. "Look doll ya gotta watch what ya say to him. Spot ain't as nice as da rest of us." He spoke sternly but I could still see the laughter hidden in his eyes.

I didn't want to argue with Race so I just nodded my head. "Alright," that seemed to satisfy his worry for the moment.

"So how ya feelin'?" Mush asked, he had been standing in the doorway laughing hysterically for around five minutes.

"Actually, I'm feeling rather hungry. How long have I been sick?" I asked looking back at Racetrack.

"For around a week." He responded and I almost had a heart attack.

"For a week! I have to get back to the school! They probably think I'm dead or something," The boys were hesitant to let me go, saying that I needed more rest before I went outside once more. But I assured them that I was fine. Jack's current girlfriend, Sara, lent me one of her dresses and I thanked her graciously, promising to return it once I came back.

Racetrack showed me the directions back to St. Brutus's, but he refused to go inside. "Its outta my league," he replied. "But I'll wait for ya out here."

There I was, standing before a part of my past that I would have rather left hidden forever. The black bars that separated me from the rest of my life shimmered in the sunlight. I walked slowly up to the gate and pressed gently upon it. Without an effort, it swung open with a creak of the hinges.

I felt rather self-conscious as I walked through the now empty hallways of the school, wearing nothing but a brown and white handmaidens dress. I only passed by a few of my old teachers and they walked on without even noticing my presence. I knew that they probably mistook me for one of the servants. Most of the young girls were in the main hall for lunch so I would have the pleasure of not being noticed.

Up the stairs I walked, until finally I reached the red carpeted hallway. On my solemn walk to the large brown doors that lie at the end, the eyes of the headmistresses seemed to be judging me as I passed. With my hands trembling, I gently opened the door.

The current headmistress looked up quickly and starred at me with a strange expression on her face. One that lacked neither surprise nor anger. "I have been expecting you," she said.

"I am sorry that it took me so long to return. I fell ill and was delayed," I replied and she looked at me with dull interest.

"I do not wish to hear excuses. Come and sit down, we must discuss what is to happen to you," the headmistress motioned for me to sit in the same chair that I had sat in the day she told me that my parents had died.

"Yes ma'am," I replied and did as I was told.

"Now, onto your parents will," At the mention of a will, I leaned forward slightly in my chair. My entire life depended on the thin slip of paper she held in her hand. "As you know, your parents were graced with a rather large sum of money and being their child it is only fair that you receive half of it," I took me a few moments to understand what she had just said.

"Why only half? Who shall receive the other share of the money?" I asked confused slightly. I knew of no other relatives that were alive at the time.

"Why, your brother of course! You did not think that your parents would leave everything to you. Such a selfish child," The headmistress shook her head.

"But you are mistaken, I have no brother. I am the only child," I stated confidently.

"You do not know?" she asked me with blatant shock in her voice. "Your father had a son to a previous marriage. Before he met your mother of course," I stared at her unable to speak. How could my parents not have told me something of this importance? Did my father think that he could spend his entire life, hiding the fact that he had bore another child to someone other than my own mother?

"No, I had not been informed of this," I said blankly.

"Yes, well this is not the time to discuss family issues. As I have already stated, your parents left you half of there earnings. Which as of now, adds up to be approximately 24,000 dollars." I choked on those words.

"24,000 dollars?" I repeated the words as if they were foreign to my mouth.

"But there is one stipulation." the headmistress replied and I gave her my full attention. "They have put the money into an account, that you will not be allowed to open until the age of twenty-one, unless before then, you find a suitable husband. Then on your wedding day, you shall be free to disperse the money as you wish," I felt as if a hammer had been pounded into my stomach. I was still only seventeen, what was I suppose to do until my twenty first birthday? Leave it to my parents to try and persuade me to marry, even on their death bed.

"Surely there is another way for me to retrieve the money. How and where will I live until then?" I asked as I stood up and began pacing the room.

"Well it is only proper that your parent's estate and all its belongings be given to the eldest son. So if your brother does not agree to take you in. Then I am afraid you will be sent to an orphanage." I wanted to break down in tears, but I held strong.

"I do not even know my brother, why would he take me in? I would just be one more mouth for him to feed."

"I will not deny that the chance of him taking you under his care are very slim, Hanna. But there is still a chance," The headmistress replied.

"What if I were to tell you that I have found a suitable place where I would be allowed to live?" I asked, wondering if the city would even allow me to live on my own.

"Where exactly is this place?"

"I would be living in the Newsies Lodging House. The boarder has agreed to let me stay there until I am able to make other accommodations," The headmistress looked slightly appalled. Everyone knew that a lodging house was the home of all the orphans and runaways that sold newspapers because they didn't have any other choice. In her society it was something so disgraceful that I don't even think she could comprehend how I could ask such a thing.

"Surely you do not wish to live in such a place!" The headmistress stated.

"Of course I do not wish it! But what other choice do I have?" I asked.

She stared into my eyes for a few moments before she nodded her head in agreement.

"Yes, you are right! There isn't much of a choice now is there. It is sad thing to see something like this happen to someone such as yourself. We had such high hopes for you." It hurt me as her words sunk in. It crushed my spirit into tiny pieces, to know that everyone was giving up on me already.

"May I go and retrieve my belongings?" I asked solemnly.

She nodded her head redundantly as I turned on my heels to go. I walked swiftly out the door without another word. All I could think of was how my parents could do something like this. Of course, when they had written the Will, surely they didn't consider dying at such a young age. But they should have been a little bit more considerate of my circumstances. How did they think that I would survive without anything to support me? Our house would be going to the older brother, whom they had neglected to inform me that I had. All of my money is locked up in a safe at the bank and it will remain there until my 21st birthday. Which unfortunately does not occur until 4 years from now.

After walking up the last flight of stairs and down the dreary hallways, I finally made it to my room. Or what had previously been my room. With a turn of the door knob I walked inside. For weeks I had looked upon this place as a prison. But now as I scanned longingly over my belongings, it occurred to me that this was all that remained of my previous existence.

I reluctantly packed everything that I had into my brown travel bag and what I could not stuff inside, I carried in my hands. Sighing, I took one last look over everything and then shut the door.

Outside Racetrack was waiting for me patiently. As I walked past the gate, I dropped one of my bags and a picture of my mom fell out. The frame shattered onto the dirty ground. Race ran up, kneeling down he picked up the picture carefully.

"Is this your mother?" he asked. I nodded my head as I looked down at her carefully. Even though I had never admitted it, I resembled her in so many ways. Her hair was golden blonde and unlike my own, was shoulder length and straight. Her eyes were deep green and sparkling, as she smiled up at me.

"Her name was Elizabeth," I replied as I took the picture from his hands. He just nodded his head and didn't respond.

We didn't talk again for two blocks as he led me back to the lodging house. Finally Racetrack asked what had been nagging at him since I come out of the school. "So, how did it go?"

I looked at him sadly, "I don't want to talk about it right now, if that's alright."

"Sure Hanna, but you'll havta talk about it sometime." Race said. It was strange to hear him call me by my real name. For some reason, I didn't feel as if I fit that name anymore.

"I know Race and I will. But I just need some time, that's all," he smiled softly once more as we reached the door to the Lodging House. I sat my stuff down on the ground at my feet and looked up at the building that loomed before me.

Right then I knew that my old life was over and a new one was just beginning. As far as I was concerned, Hanna Grimmuald was dead. Fate had decided to lead me down a different path than it had first intended. Or maybe this was what it had in store all along. Either way I know my path will be hard, but possibly one day I will find peace with it and move on. Maybe one day, but I knew that today was not that day.

****

Thanks to:

Padfootismyhero-I am glad that you liked that chapter. It was so hard for me to write. I wanted to make sure that I didn't get to confusing with details, because I tend to do that sometimes. No she wasn't paralyzed although it did seem like that. Here is your update and I hope you liked this chapter as much as you liked the others.

Coin- Of course I had to have Mush in the chapter, he is one of my favorite characters. I'm glad you liked the part were all of the people from her past were looking down on her. I tried to make it show that she was no longer part of that group and show how money can separate a society. Keep reviewing and let me know what you think of this chapter.

Bookey Elliot- Here is my next chapter. Sorry for all of the spelling mistakes I made when I reviewed your story. Lol I type fast and mess up a lot. Well I hope you update your story soon, I really do enjoy it.

CiCi- Thanks for the compliment, it means a lot to me. I try to put as much description into a story so that it makes it more realistic to the reader. Don't worry I have some plans for Spot and Hanna. There is still a lot ahead of them. So you will just have to wait and see. Even I don't know exactly how this story may end. But I have a good idea.

NadaZimri-Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed this chapter. Her name is Hanna. Lol don't worry I am very bad at remembering names myself. Well I hope that you liked this chapter and let me know what you think. I look forward to your reviews.

Splashey- You are exactly right! This is only the beginning and there is lots more drama to come. This story is crazy, it just seems to write itself. I sit down without a clue as to what I'm going to write and then I end up with an entire chapter. I swear its like the stuff just pops into my head. Anyway, Here is the next chapter. I have been trying to add a little Spot hugs, in here every once in awhile. Because he is a main part of the plot. I love Race, he is like one a my favorite characters. So of course I am going to have him in the story. I just love your reviews, they make me so happy! Hope to hear from you soon,

Luv ya lots,

Leila3


	8. Invitations

Hey everyone, it's me, Leila3. I changed my penname to BlackWiltedRose. I was getting bored with the last one. My next chapter will be posted next Saturday. This chapter is very long. I knew where I wanted to take the story line but I just couldn't seem to get there, other things just kept popping up in my head. I hope you enjoy it. I am so happy that you all like it. Yes, I know I have said that more than a hundred times before. But its true. Anyway, keep reviewing and I'll keep updating as soon as possible. This may very well be the first story that I actually finish. But that wont be for awhile. Anyway, I'll shut up and let you get on to reading. **PS. I am so, so sorry if there are spelling mistakes. I had to post this today, so I didn't have a lot of time to go over it. Thanks!**

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

****

Chapter Seven

After I had finally finished unpacking. I sat myself down on the old wooden chair in the corner of my new room. I felt more at home after everything had been placed in its proper positions. I folded up my clothes and put them neatly into the dresser that Mush was kind enough to bring me. All of my expensive designer dresses would remain there for sometime because there would be no use for them now. I would not be attending anymore evening tea sessions or extravagant dinner parties. I was a commoner and I wouldn't have the heart to walk around dressed so elaborate when all my new friends were practically in rags.

There was a soft knock on the door and I opened it up to find Jack and the rest of the boys, standing there starring at me. "Here," he said as he held out a piece of bread. "Ya should be hungry by now."

"Thanks," I replied smiling as I took it out of his hands. I tried not to act famished as I bit off a small piece from the corner.

"We need da talk," Jack torpidly stated. It didn't really surprise me considering I knew it was coming. Really, I had hoped I could just seclude myself from the world like I wished. But in a building with around thirty young men, I think it was rather impossible.

"I know," I replied. Sighing deeply as I flopped down onto my bed.

Jack walked over and pulled up the chair to sit across from me. The rest of the boys including Spot, who decided to stay in Manhattan for a few days, filed in after him. They stood around the room starring receptively. I felt as if I was back in one of my father's court rooms, but this time I was the one being judged.

"So, what's going on? Ya stayin' here or what?" Jack asked. I looked around nervously and Race caught my eyes. He winked at me to say that everything was alright and I turned back to Jack feeling slightly less uneasy.

"Yeah I guess I will be staying." Jack nodded his head and then continued.

"Is this permanent or just until ya can find somewhere else ta stay?" At this question I looked down at my hands.

"I can't afford to live anywhere else," I heard a few of the boys murmur apprehensively to themselves.

"What do ya mean ya can't afford it? Ya parents are rich!" A brown haired boy spat out ruthlessly. I stood up and turned to him angrily.

"They were…My parents were rich! But there not here anymore if you haven't noticed by now." Jack walked up and put a hand on my shoulder. He led me back to sit down on the bed.

"Stay outta dis," he pointed to the brown haired boy, who shut up quickly. Then Jack turned his attention back to me. "But Flasher brings up a good point. How could ya parents of had so much money and yet they left ya with nothing?" I take it that Flasher was the arrogant young man standing beside Skittery.

I just sat there glaring at him for a few minutes before I came to the conclusion that it was best just to tell them and get it over with. As I started to talk, I found that it had become continuously harder not to look over at Spot, who remained motionless by the window.   
"They didn't exactly leave me with nothing. But it just so happens that I have a half brother out there somewhere that my parents forgot to inform me about. Being the eldest son, he was given my house along with everything in it. Also since I am no longer the only child, our parents money was split evenly down the middle. But my parents decided that my share of the money would be placed into a savings bond that I won't wont be aloud to retain until my 21st birthday or unless I get married before then." Deciding that in order to prevent myself from looking over at Spot, I would just stare down at my hands. I jumped as I heard his voice above the silence.

"How much money?" He asked, I looked over and he stared at me continuously without blinking.

"What?" I asked, unable to believe that he would ask such a question.

"How much money?" Spot repeated the question.

"I don't see why it matters," I replied continuing to stare back at him.

"Just answer da question," he said blankly. I looked deep into his blue eyes and tried to find out what he was thinking at the moment, but he had somehow found away to put up a wall.

"As of now I have 24,000 dollars in the bank," Some of the boys gasped. I knew that most of them had never known that kind of money before. But Spot just continued starring at me.

The tension in the air was building as we continued to have our battle of wits. "So ya don't know this brotha of yours?" Jack asked, trying to keep me and Spot from having any more conflicts.

It took a great deal of effort but eventually I pried my eyes from Spots and looked over at Jack. "No, I have never met him before. I don't even know his name." I replied. After I finished my sentence there was a short pause. Finally Jack spoke.

"Well, ya can stay as long as ya like." he replied nodding his head as he came to a conclusion. Then he stood up to leave.

"Wait! Jack, how can ya let her stay? She ain't no newsie!" Flasher stated angrily before Mush smacked him up beside the back of the head.

"Because what I say goes, got dat Flasha and ya best learn it too. Because if ya don't ya may just find yaself livin' out on da streets like before. She ain't no newsies, not yet at least and she may have a lot of money in da bank, but as of now she ain't got nothin'. I'll trust Doll here, just like I trusted you. So until she proves me utterwise she's stayin." Flasher glared daggers at Jack and then shoved his way out the door, knowing not to challenge his authority.

"Look Jack, I don't want to cause any problems. I'll just stay in the orphana…" But I didn't get a chance to finish because he put up a hand to stop me.

"Other than Flasha, do any of you boys have a problem wit her stayin here?" Jack turned and asked the rest of the newsies. To my surprise they all shook there heads and said no. Jack turned back to me. "See there aint no problem. Just rememba to stick by da rules and you'll be fine."

"Alright," I said giving in. I knew that there was no use in arguing with Jack. Once he made up his mind, it was set in stone.

"The headline was good yesterday, so me and da boys are going to Tibby's to celebrate lata, you should join us." Jack offered with surprising politeness. I took up his offer and they told me to be ready in an hour.

Satisfied that they had been given an answer the boys departed from my room. But the last to leave was Spot who decided to take his time. On the way past me he stopped.

"Ya know, your lucky dat Jack had taken such a likin' to ya. Because not everyone would be so kind." His voice was harsh but there was a sense of calmness in the air about him that made me uneasy. I knew now what he was thinking, for Spot understood that he had me right were he wanted me. Because now I didn't know whether I was actually afraid of Spot or more so afraid of what might happen if I chose to give in to my curiosity.

"And your lucky Spot, that I'm in such a good mood or else I might consider embarrassing you in front of all of your friends again." His red lips curved into that malicious grin of his, that I had come to despise. I knew that Spot Conlon was the most devious, cunning, leader of a brutal pack of miscreants and to cross him would mean big trouble. But somehow I couldn't stop myself from testing his patients any chance that I could.

I hated Spot with passion so deep it could be cut with a knife and yet I still felt somehow connected to him. For he was not the only one who hid behind a mask. Maybe it was sympathy I felt, or maybe something more. But I don't think it was the sun shining brightly through the open window that was making my body feel so warm.

I knew he felt the heat too, because Spot took a step closer and then another, until he was starring directly into my blazing green eyes. It was a challenge, he wanted me to break. I could see it hidden in those pools of blue. He wanted me to feel as vulnerable and as weak as I had made him feel this morning.

Spot remained so close that I could actually see the tiny specks of yellow and green that lay hidden in his eyes. My brain was telling me to push him away, to step back and regain control. But I think there was something else that held me firmly to the ground. I couldn't feel myself moving forward, but somehow we continued to get closer and closer. I had to make him stop; I wasn't ready for what he would bring into my life.

Spots face was only centimeters away from my own, when I realized what he was doing. I closed my eyes tightly and whispered, "Please leave."

I continued to tell myself that this was just another one of Spots pathetic mind games, a mischievous plot to prove that I was just like _any other_ _girl_. But the shock and confusion that gleamed in his eyes for a fleeting moment made me question my decision. "Smart choice," he whispered in my ear. Then walked around me and out the door.

I didn't move from my location, as I starred solemnly at the floor for a few moments trying to gather my broken emotions. How could it be that every time he walks into a room, I feel as if I loose complete control of my life?

"Ya like him, don't ya?" came a familiar voice from behind me. I whipped around quickly and saw Race leaning against the door frame smirking.

"What! Of course I don't." I said offensively.

"Come on Doll, I'd like ta think dat we are friends. Ya can tell me if ya do, wouldn't be a surprise though. Most girls fall for Spot, always have. Dunno why though." Race walked over to the bed and took a seat.

"You are my friend Race and you would be the first one I would inform if the situation ever occurred. But I'll tell you this now, that what I feel for Spot Conlon is the farthest thing from _like, _rather _loath._ For I detest that boy more than anyone I have ever known. I would think that my actions towards him would prove likewise. But obviously I have been giving the wrong impression." Racetrack continued to stare at me as though he was judging on whether or not to believe me. Finally he came to a decision and nodded his head understandingly.

"Alright Doll, whateva ya say. But I'm warnin' ya now, its risky business getting' involved wit someone like him. I've known 'em for years and his reputation with women ain't exactly da best." I walked over and sat down in the chair facing Race.

"Well I'll keep that in mind if ever the opportunity arises. But as for now there is nothing going on between me and Spot Conlon and if I have anything to say about it, there never will be." I fixed my long brown skirt and slouched back slightly in my chair.

"Just be careful, dats all I'm sayin," Race retorted in a brotherly manner, as he stood up to leave.

"I will," Standing up myself; I patted him on the back. "No need to worry, Race. I've got a good head on my shoulders. I know bad news when I see it." He smiled and then walked out the door, shutting it behind him.

"Get dressed, we'll meet ya downstairs. The boys said dat they would stay out so ya could use da bathroom and clean up sum." Race yelled as I heard his footsteps retreating down the old wooden staircase in the other room.

I took off my brown dress and hung it over the arm of the chair. I was wearing nothing but my undergarments as of cold chill blew in from the open window and I shivered slightly. I rummaged through my dresser and found a casual skirt and blouse to wear. Once I had changed into my clothes I walked out of the bedroom door and into the bunkroom. It was temporarily empty, as I made my way across the floor and into the somewhat open bathroom area. There were multiple sinks lining the walls with small mirrors that hung above them. The room was disgustingly filthy, with dirty rags and half empty bottles of shaving cream lying around.

Yet there was something that seemed out of place. At the very end of the row of sinks lining the left wall closest to the stalls. There was one sink in particular that stood out from the rest. It was sparkling clean and sitting on a small shelf below the mirror was a beautiful bouquet of flowers.

I smiled to myself, as I picked up the bouquet of daisies. It just made me feel so wonderful to know that the boys were trying hard to make me feel as comfortable as possible. I laid the flowers back down and picked up a wash cloth that was hanging over the side. Wetting it, I quickly washed off my face and arms. It felt as if there had been a layer of filth that collected on my skin over the last week. When I looked back into the mirror, I once again saw the girl that I used to be. Except I had lost the shine in my eyes.

Once I finished cleaning up a bit, washing off and fixing my hair into a simple braid on the back of my head, I used the bathroom and then made my way downstairs. I felt better than I had in many days and my joy must have shown on my face. When the rest of the boys saw me they smiled and Race walked up patting me on the back.

"Now there's the girl we know! Welcome back Dollface!" He said and I shoved his arm playfully with my good hand. "Come on, were suppose to be meetin' Spot and some of his boys at Tibby's in ten minutes. If we don't hurry we'll be late and it aint good ta keep em' waitin."

"Well he could use a little bit a patience," I grumbled.

"What did ya say back der Dollface?" Jack asked as we walked out of the Lodging House.

"Oh nothing, just that I can hardly contain my excitement," I replied with blatant sarcasm in my voice. Racetrack grinned widely beside me and most of the boys laughed. But some of them looked over at me apprehensively, worried that I may become the cause of a future war with Brooklyn.

It didn't take us long to get to Tibby's and I had begun to feel as if I had made a bad decision upon agreeing to join them. I needed to get out, to breath some fresh air. But the mere thought of being surrounded by a group of young men who didn't know the first thing about the word _courtesy_, made my stomach churn. Let alone being forced to befriend Spot, whom I would have rather seen jump off the Brooklyn Bridge.

The boys in Spots gang were just as rough and as fierce as I had predicted them to be. All wielding the same sense of rash hostility towards the world, as there leader. Even as I stood in-between Mush and Jack, the degrading stares that I received from our new arrivals made me want to cower under one of the tables.

I fidgeted uncomfortably and looked backwards longingly towards the door. I think Racetrack saw me because he pulled me off to the side. "Just stay wit us," he retorted and I nodded my head obediently.

I grabbed Race's hand and he pulled me through the large crowed. I pretended as if I couldn't hear the boys saying, "Is dat da girl?" or "So she's da one?" I didn't even want to think of the horrific things Spot had said to his boys about me when he left.

We reached a large booth in the far corner of the restaurant were Jack, Spot and some blonde haired boy that I didn't know, were sitting. Jack moved over and I took a seat in-between him and Race. Spot averted eye contact with me and just mumbled a soft hello, in greeting. I was shocked not to hear some smart remark coming from his mouth. I came to the conclusion that he too, just wanted to make it out of this rather uncomfortable situation with as little confrontation as possible

I sat there starring out the window, as I looked across the street at the school were I had once attended. After a few moments passed I had successfully blocked out any outside conversations. It wasn't until I heard my name called that I came back to reality.

"Dolly ya payin' attention?" Race asked. I looked around the table and everyone was starring at me. Other than Spot who was fiddling with his suspenders.

"Oh, yeah sorry," I replied.

"So ya commin' to the party or what?" Jack asked.

"What party?" I asked confused.   
"Spot is having a party for da newsies at the Brooklyn Lodging House two days from now. They said ya could come if ya want." Race replied rather hesitantly. I could tell by the tone of his voice that he didn't really recommend me going. I looked over at Spot, who looked at me for a brief moment and then started fixing his slingshot.

I don't know why but the fact that Spot Conlon was practically ignoring my presence, infuriate me to no end. What right did he have to be upset at me? I didn't want this any more than he did. I knew just by the hostile glares that I was receiving from his boys that Spot didn't want me at this party. Because I would be nothing but a further hindrance to his overly large ego which had been slightly damaged after our unnecessary little argument that morning.

After taking into complete consideration of that fact that I would be an unwelcome guest, there was nothing else that I could do but…"Of course I'll come."

Spot looked up quickly and I could see the intense glare of annoyance blazing in his eyes. I didn't retaliate with harsh words, but rather a soft smile. It scared me slightly to know that when I crossed the Brooklyn Bridge I would no longer be in the safe confinements of Manhattan. I would be in his territory, alone and vulnerable to anything that he would throw my way. Of course I wouldn't literally be alone, for I'd be in the company of the Jack, Racetrack and the rest of Manhattan Newsboys. But even they were no match for the full force of Brooklyn.

We sat there for another hour and the boys talked about all the new developments in the Newsie world. The played in a ruthless game of poker, which Racetrack won and talked nonchalantly about there latest conquests in the complicated world of romance. Watching this, I was reminded of a small group of school girls gossiping about there recent heartaches and secret crushes.

After our small get together had come to a conclusion, Mush offered to take me on a tour of the city. It was funny how little you could know about a place, when you live there your entire life. Even though I felt exhausted, I didn't want to go back to being stuck in the tiny room that was my new home.

We had begun walking down a narrow street, which was lined with jewelry booths and fruit carts. The road was made of gray cobblestone, which was much easier to accommodate than most of the dirt roads around town. Horse drawn carriage cars made there way through the crowded pathways, as people parted to make way.

I looked around in a slight stupor, amazed at how little I had experience in my seventeen years of life. I felt like a new born child when it first makes its way into the world. Completely oblivious and ignorant to anything and everyone around me.

"Ya really are enjoyin' this aren't ya?" Mush asked laughing at the dazed expression of joy that was apparent on my face. To him it was nothing more than people going on with there everyday lives, but to me it was something spectacular.

My mother had never approved of me walking around town, at least not _this_ part of town. I had been told that I was to only go specifically were I needed to be. Also I had been taught that I was to only associate with those of my social class. Other civilians were not worth my time or patience. I wonder what my mother would say, had she been here to see me now.

After we walked around for a few hours I looked up at the sky as the sun began to set. "Come on, I think its best if we start making our way back to the Lodging House. It's getting dark."

Mush agreed and we picked up something to eat for dinner. On the way back we had to go past the school. Sitting outside of its black iron gates was a large brown carriage. Inside there sat a very proper looking couple. The woman had wheat blonde hair and a shallow, thin face. She was dressed very elegantly in a long flowing, white and blue gown. The man sitting beside her looked twice her age and very prudent. He had gray hair that he was unable to conceal from beneath his dark black top hat.

Suddenly the gates to the school opened wide and out walked a very familiar looking young women. When she had gotten close enough for me to see her face. I could hardly contain my excitement. "Julia!" I said loudly. She must have heard because she turned around quickly. Upon seeing me, she ran over to my side.

"Hanna, Oh! I've heard what has happened! What a dreadful state of affairs! Are you alright? You gave me quite a fright. I woke up one morning and they told me you had gone." She wrapped her arms tightly around me. But when I squirmed uncomfortably, she noticed my injured shoulder. Julia cried out. "What has happened?"

"I am fine. No need to fret. I just had an unfortunate accident with a horse. But I was well taken care of." I turned and smiled at Mush. With a quick motion of my hand I beckoned him to come forward. "I do not know if you remember Mush, from our little outing at the restaurant." I said this very low. For I did not wish for her parents to hear.

"Of course! It is a pleasure to see you again!" Julia said rather enthusiastically. But then she covered it up quickly. I smiled softly as I watched both of my friends blush furiously.

"I have been staying in the company of Mush here and the rest of the newsies. All of whom are so very kind to me." I replied.

"Yes, you must tell me all about it. When shall you be returning to school? It's not the same without you." Julia commented.

"I'm sorry to say, but I will no longer be attending St. Brutus's, or any school for that matter. I am living with the Newsies now. There was a complication with my parents Will, and I was left with nothing." Julia looked shocked beyond recall.

"Oh Hanna, how offal!" She said looking at me with pity. Unable to bear the humiliation that I was once again receiving, I averted my eyes to the ground. Julia began to speak again but she was interrupted.

"Julia dear, we don't have much time." It was her mother who spoke, as she climbed gracefully out of the carriage and made her way over.

"Mamma, this is Hanna Grimmuald." Julia replied, pointing to me. I felt a knot in my stomach as her mother looked upon me with nothing more than discussed.

I knew that it was due to the fact that I was the child of the one man who had kept her husband from becoming the top judge at the courthouse. As long as my father was around, Julia's dad would always remain second best. But now that my father was permanently out of the picture, I was no longer a threat to her family.

"Yes, well we have to go. It was a pleasure meeting you, I'm sure." Her mother replied ruthlessly as she took Julia's hand and pulled her back to the carriage.

"Goodbye," she whispered looking at me apologetically.

Mush took my arm and made me start walking once more. But I could still hear Julia's mother scolding her from behind. "I do not understand why you feel the need to converse with such people. Have I taught you nothing?"

"But Mamma, her parents just…" Julia said.

"Yes, I know. Such a tragic thing. But that does not mean that you must lower yourself to her level. I do not want you to see that girl ever again, Julia. Do I make myself clear?" Her mother had her hands on her hips and was looking down at her, as if she was an untrained puppy.

"Yes, Ma'am!" Julia snapped. She turned around quickly and then climbed up into the carriage, taking a seat beside her father.

I continued walking and Mush looked over at me as I quickly wiped a tear from my cheek. Neither one of us spoke until we reached the front door of the Lodging House. Before he could walk inside I put a hand on his arm. Mush stopped and looked at me.

"I'm sorry," I whispered sorrowfully.

"For what?" He asked confused.

"I'm sorry that I used to be like that. I'm sorry for how I had treated you." I don't know why but I needed to apologies. I needed to know that he would forgive me.

"Look Doll, you never treated any of us like dat. You are different than them." Mush said redundantly.

"Yeah, that's what everyone keeps telling me. But I just don't see it." I said exasperated.

"That's because ya need ta look a little closer," Mush said as he pulled me into a hug. "Now lets get ya inside. You have a big day ahead of ya tomorrow."

****

Thank you to:

Padfootismyhero-Nope Spot isn't her brother. Her brother hasn't come into the story yet. Yeah it was fun to write the part where Hanna and Spot were fighting. His character is just a blast to make stuff up about. Its like at times you just want to choke him, but you can't exactly hate him either because he is just so cute! Lol Anyway write back and let me know what ya think.

Coin- Hey thanks so much for offering to be my beta reader. It means a lot to me. I sure could use the help. Email me soon, let me know what you think of this chapter. I know that there are so many mistakes…but I had to post in today. Because I am going on vacation tomorrow.

LenaJade- Yeah this story is filled with a lot of angst and there will probably be more. Not as much though. Anyway, sorry but I can't exactly tell you who the love triangle will be with. Because I like to keep people wondering. But I can say that Spot will definitely be part of it. Well let me know what you thought of this chapter.

Ershey- YEAH!! I have a new reviewer. Well if your reading this let me know what you thought of the rest of the story. I hope that you liked it as much as you liked the prologue. That's ok if you're a late reviewer I am just happy that someone else likes my story.

NadaZimri- Of course I had to make her tell off Spot. It wouldn't be any fun if she didn't. I know exactly what you mean. I do secretly love him lol. I did change my name as you can see and the stories are still here. I was going to put my name as Crimson, but I decided on BlackWiltedRose instead. Hanna's older brother will be coming into the story soon. We will just have to wait and see how that turns out. Thanks and I hope to hear from you soon.

Splashey- lol That's funny, I used to take Spanish. But now I take Italian. Your reviews make me very happy to read. I am so glad that you liked that chapter. Yeah I know, Spot confuses me sometimes too when I'm writing him. I think its just because no matter how angry he makes you, you can't stay mad at him for long. So I make him mean and then show his nice side.

Emotions- Yeah I felt really depressed when I was writing that chapter. Well as you can see, she is ok. I hope that you enjoyed these last few chapters and I'll be waiting to hear what you think.

Luv ya lots,

Leila3


	9. New occupations

Hey everyone here is chapter eight. I just got back from my trip and I am updating just like I promised. I hope that you like this chapter, it was a little difficult for me to write. Because it wasn't as exciting as my last chapters, but just as good I hope. Its not as depressing. Anyway I will have chapter nine up next Saturday (I am updating every Saturday from now on.) Keep reviewing and let me know what you think. Also if you can read my short fic that I just posted called Growing Young. It's a one shot so I want to get as many people to read it as possible. Because its my first songfic and short story. Well keep reading and I hope to hear from you soon!

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

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Chapter Eight

__

Bang, Bang! I woke up the next day with a startlingly loud pounding sound coming from my bedroom door. "Dolly, you awake yet?" Racetrack hollered from the opposite side.

Moaning, I rolled over in my bed, pulling the covers up overtop of my head. For a few moments it was silent and then the pounding began again. I pulled the covers back down and then reluctantly climbed out of the confinements of my deep slumber. "I'm up Race, could you stop with that horrific pounding. Before you give me a migraine," I yelled loudly as I made my way over to the door. I opened it up and Race was standing there fully clothed, ready for a hard days work. "Why are you making such a racket?"

I rubbed the sleeplessness out of my eyes and then starred at him sternly. He smirked and then took a puff on his cigar. "Sorry Doll. But since, I ain't aloud ta come in. I needed ta wake ya up somehow." Race replied as he laughed at my ragged appearance. "Didn't get much sleep last night, did ya?"

"Not exactly," I commented as I fixed my nightgown and straightened my hair a little. I felt rather self-conscious as some of the other boys walked by. But they didn't even take notice of my appearance.

"Do ya have a jacket?" Race asked. "Because it's kinda chilly outside today."

"Yeah," I said as I turned around and walked to my dresser.

"Ok, well the boys are done getting changed so you are free to use da bathroom. Oh and if I were you, I wouldn't wear anything fancy. Just something comfortable, if ya got anything like dat," Race stated as he walked out of the room, shutting the door and leaving me in confusion.

I began to wonder where they were planning on taking me today. But I forgot all about it as I looked for the clothes that Race had specified. Deep in the bottom of my dresser I found an old black skirt that came down to my lower thigh and a plain white blouse. I put on a pair of knee high black socks and took out my oldest pair of boots, which were worn in at the bottom. I would have to have Race help me tie them later because it would be rather complicated to tie a shoe with only one hand.

Once I was dressed, I walked out of the bedroom, through the bunk room and into the bathroom. There was one small boy with brown hair still remaining and he smiled at me as I walked in. He finished washing off his face and then left quickly to go with the other boys that were downstairs in the sitting room adjacent to the main entryway.

As I made my way to my sink, I put a note in the back of my mind to recommend that the boys clean up a little, later on. For the whole place was as filthy as a pig sty. Dirty cloths were sprawled around everywhere. Mud was caked onto the floor and sinks. I didn't even want to look at the toilet stalls, because who knows what I might find in there.

I took out the towel that I had used the day before and washed off my face. The cold water woke me up fast. Even though I had tried not to think about my past, I soon began to miss the small privileges of being rich. For instance the benefit of warm water. I desperately needed a full bath to clean off all of the filth that I had collected over the last few days. But I was reluctant to use the metal bin that they called a bathtub. Let alone take off all of my clothes when there was still the chance of one of the boys walking in on me. So I would have to wait for another day.

I looked at my reflection in the mirror and cringed slightly. The rats' nest that I called my hair was piled in a frizzy mess of curls on the top of my head. I decided not to risk brushing it, since it would most likely only make it frizzier. So I ran my fingers underneath the faucet and then gently through my hair. After a few minutes I finally tamed the beast and was mildly satisfied with the outcome.

I left and walked back into my bedroom. I picked up my coat and slung it over my good arm as I made my way down the stairs to meet the boys. By the time I got down there the boys were lounging around in the sitting room, basically doing nothing but waiting. A few of the younger boys were pretending to sword fight with wooden sticks.

When I entered the room, all of the boys looked up. "Girls sure do take a long time ta get ready!" Mush said.

I laughed to myself. "Yeah, well it's not our fault that we actually care about what we look like."

I walked over and sat down on an old red sofa that was torn in multiple spots on the surface. I asked Race and he agreed to help me with my shoe laces. Once I was completely dressed, everyone got ready to go. "Why should we care about what we look like when nobody takes da time to stare at us?" Flasher retorted and most of the boys agreed.

"Why should you only have to look nice for others? Here's a little advice for you. The reason nobody pays attention to you is because most people only show respect to those who respect themselves," Flasher looked at me apprehensively but didn't say a word. "If you don't have any regard for your own well being, then what makes you think that others should? The only reason that I try to look as nice as possible is because it makes me feel better, not because I care what others think." I put my arm in one of my sleeves and then threw the other one over my right shoulder.

"I'm sorry ta break up this little dispute but we gots ta get goin'. The circulation bell should be ringin' any second now." Jack said and he ushered the boys out the door.

I followed the group reluctantly as they made there way over to the distribution center. The sun was faintly visible behind the dark gray clouds and I pulled my coat tighter as a gust of wind blew dry leaves into the street. It didn't take long before we arrived right as the gates opened. There was a large group of more than a hundred kids, standing around, waiting to collect their papers.

The crowd was made up entirely out of young men, but I did notice two rather rough looking teenage girls standing beside a pile of old crates over to my left. I wanted to walk over and ask them how they did it. What some of there tricks were for being a female newsie. But as I studied their behavior I began to think otherwise.

One of the girls had a rather large head of flaming red hair and wore a skirt far to short to be modestly cut. Her companion who had dark blonde hair, dressed a little more conservatively but still remained nothing less than trashy as she let some guy kiss all over her neck.

Watching the disgustingly perverse display in front of me, I decided that it would be best not to disturb them. Yet as I watched the young man slip a few quarters into the blonde's bodice, I knew right away how they survived. The girls used there bodies as an advantage. If they didn't make good money that day selling papers, they would make it somewhere else.

Right then I knew in the back of my mind, that no matter how hard I work I will have little success in the Newsie world. For I could not use my body as a mere object to make money. I'm different than those girls; I have a larger set of values for myself. So I knew that if I did try to pursue this occupation I would just have to create my own way of doing things.

"Hey Doll, dis way," Jack said as he led me up a ramp and to an open window. We had to walk past those girls on the way and the red head glared questioningly at me. I knew that to them it was as if I was invading there territory. This was there world and I didn't belong.

Behind the large window there stood a tall thin old man, with a bowler hat on and a stripped dark blue vest. "How many?" he asked.

Jack slapped a few coins down onto the counter in front of us, "a hundred and twenty papes." he said.

A young boy from the back room came out and handed Jack the papers. Then from behind us came a harsh female voice. "So Kelly, When did ya start payin' for all da new comers' round here?"

We turned around and standing there was the tall red head. She looked me over with resentment and then glared back at Jack. "I don't see where it's really any of your business, Rose." Jack replied with annoyance.

"Of course it's my business," She said briskly. "Now ya gonna introduce me or what?"

Jack turned to me. "Dollface, dis is Rose. Rose dis is Dollface. There now we all knows eachotha. I gots business ta tend to, so if you'd excuse us." Jack grabbed my hand and went to leave but Rose wasn't going anywhere.

"Oh so ya name is Dollface is it?" She said as she circled around me. "Hmm, I don't think da name suits ya." Rose commented as she looked at me pathetically.

"Her name suit's 'er just fine." Racetrack came to my defense. He was getting frustrated I could tell.

"She won't last a day out on da streets. She may have a nice face, but dats all she's got." The dim witted blonde, who was now standing by her side laughed maniacally.

"She's got more than you's got," Said a cocky voice from the center of the crowd. When it parted, I felt as if I was about to faint. Walking towards us was Spot Conlon. His face was neutral and passive. Most of the boys went quiet and we could hear the soft clunk of his cane every now and then. Even though I knew he was in the neighborhood I somehow didn't expect him to show up here.

For a second Rose's face went pale, but then she recovered quickly. "An' what's dat, Spot?"

He walked up to me and I glared at him relentlessly. I think he could see the fear fill my green eyes. For I was terrified to think of what he was going to say. "Well she's got a brain, dat's for sure. An' when she's angry she got's a mouth dat can beat da best of 'em. But she's got one thing that you ain't neva had." Spot paused for a few moments. "A soul," the large group of boys that had gathered around us now began to laugh hysterically as Rose huffed furiously and stormed away.

"Hey Jacky boy!" Spot spoke to Jack once more as they spit and shook hands. Then he turned to me and tipped his hat. "Dollface."

I just couldn't understand this kid. First he is whispering seductive words in my ear, and then he starts insulting me. After that he saves my life, then we were fighting again and now he just stuck up for me when I was being ridiculed. I wish Spot would just make up his mind. It would be a lot easier if I wasn't being torn in two. Trying to decipher whether or not I should hate him.

"Alright well I'd luv ta stay around an' chat, but der are papes ta sell," Race commented. He was now standing beside me and Jack with a large stack of papers under his arm.

"Yeah, ya're right Race. Here Doll, I'm only given ya twenty papes ta sell for now. Since ya don't exactly know what ya doin'," Jack handed me twenty papers and I held them tightly under my left arm.

"I normally sell alone, but I agreed ta take ya unda my wing for now. Till ya get the hang of it. But your neva ta sell alone, got dat. Always stick wit me or Jack." Race said as we began to walk out of the distribution center and into the streets of town.

"I'll keep that in mind." I replied. When Jack and Spot parted ways with us, I turned to Race again. "What just happened with that girl back there? Rose or whatever her name was."

"Oh nuttin', don't worry about her Dollface." Race responded casually, as if it was no big deal.

"Spot must really not like her if he decided to stick up for me, over her," I said laughing.

"Yeah, Spot and Rose used ta be a couple back in the day. But now dey can't stand eachotha. Nobody really knows why. It just happened. I think its cuz dey were too much alike. Ya see. Spot, he don't like having anyone coming and challenging his authority and dats exactly what Rose did," I took in everything Race said with consideration.

"Yet now Rose has her eyes set on Jack. But she ain't never gonna get da chance wit him. Cuz Jack and Sara ain't gonna be breakin' up anytime soon."

I shook my head, "I don't know why they named her Rose. I think that _Thorn_ would have been more suitable," Racetrack shook his head and laughed.

As the day went on the weather only grew colder and with the amazing help of Racetrack I had managed to sell all of my twenty papers. We were walking down the sidewalk past a vaudeville theater when Racetrack stopped me.

"Come wit me," he said as he grabbed my hand and pulled me inside the theater.

"What are we doing?" I asked confused as he drug me up to the ticket booth.

"Ta see a show of course," Race replied staunchly.

"Ok, but why?" He bought the tickets and then pulled me inside.

"Cuz ya need a little fun in ya're life." He stated as we sat down at a table in the front, by the stage.

Race and I talked a little before the lights went slightly dim and the announcer turned on the microphone. "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the star of the Vaudeville stage: Ms. Medda Larkson." From behind the curtains came a beautiful lady with bright red hair wearing a pink dress. She had an amazing voice and seemed to keep all of the young men in the audience entranced as she sang.

After the show was over Race got up and I followed him towards the stage. After the crowed cleared Medda came out from the back. "Racetrack!" She exclaimed as she hugged him like an aunt would her nephew. "It's wonderful to see you again! Where have you and the boys been?"

"Business hasn't been too good lately," was all he needed to say and Medda understood perfectly.

"So who may I ask, is this pretty young lady," she replied smiling brightly at me. I couldn't help but smile in return.

"Oh yeah, Medda dis is Hanna, Hanna dis is Medda Larkson," We both nodded our heads in greeting.

"So are you two dating?" She asked. Racetrack and I looked at each other before breaking out into a fit of laughter.

"No," Racetrack replied after he finally got control of himself. "We are just friends, Medda."

"Yeah, Race and the boys are helping me to become a newsie," I said.

Medda looked down at me surprised, "Surely you are kidding. For a newsie is not exactly the choice profession for a lady such as yourself. Have you not seen the sort of girls that sell on the streets?"

"They're not dat bad," Racetrack said but could barely defend his antics.

"Well I have no choice in the matter. For I need to make money somehow or I will no longer have a place to stay," I replied solemnly.

"I see, but have you not looked other places? Such as the cotton mills or sowing factories?" Medda asked.

"No, I have not. I was going to, but Jack refuses to allow me to live in those conditions." She just nodded her head.

"Jack always was a stubborn boy, but he's smart so I would listen to him." Medda said. "How did you enjoy the show?"

"Oh, yes! It was wonderful. The theater is beautiful." I exclaimed, looking around. When I was younger my mother would only allow me to attend private theaters for the wealthy upper class. So this was my first time attending a show such as this.

"How would you like to work here?" Medda asked. I stared at her shocked. Then I turned to look at Racetrack, who looked just as bewildered as me.

"I…I would love to." I said unable to believe my ears.

"As I had said before, the street is no place for a girl such as yourself. Shame on you Racetrack, you should have known better. But I will start you out at thirty cents an hour, passing out drinks to the customers. Once you show me that you can work hard, we will see about raising your pay." Medda laughed at the joy on my face. "How does that sound dear?" she asked.

I couldn't find the words to say so I just jumped up and hugged her. "Thank you so much!" She patted me on the head.

I left the vaudeville theater happier than I had been in many, many days. I talked to Racetrack and he convinced me that Jack would be ok with the fact that I would still be living in the Lodging house if I paid my rent, even though I wouldn't be a newsie. He said that it was a stroke of luck that led me to that job. We stopped and got a small ice cream to celebrate on the way home. I was so happy about my new employment that Spots party completely slipped my mind. It wouldn't be until tomorrow that things really began to get interesting.

****

Thank you to:

Padfootismyhero-Of course I was going to review your story, it is so good! Here's this chapter, its not one of my favorites but it's just leading up to next chapter which is the party! I can't wait to post that. Well I didn't write it yet, but when I do. I hope that you review. hugs

LenaJade- Sorry for the spelling mistakes. I give up trying to detect them all, lol. So I am going to apologies for future spelling mistakes that will be in every chapter from now until the end. Well I am glad that you enjoyed it at least and I look forward to your reviews.

Coin- Hey, I am still waiting for the beta'd chapters. But that's ok, just email me whenever you can. I hope you liked this chapter, there are a lot of things I want to fix. But I needed to post it. Well review when you can. Hope to hear from you soon.

NadaZimri- Yes I am glad I made you feel lazy, lol. Because I really love your story and you need to update soon!!!! I am just kidding about being glad that I made you feel lazy, but you still need to put up a new chapter. Because I want to know what happens next. Anyway, now that I'm done yelling at you. Pie eater is a cool character. But Spot covers my wall so I can't exactly get over him just yet. I am glad you liked the chapter and review soon.

Splashey- Yeah, I could imagine just how hard it would be to deny him in real life. Lol The chapter about the party is next. I hope you read and find out. Its going to be fun to write. I cant wait to see how everything turns out. But right now I know as much as you do. Because I don't know what's going to happen until I start writing it. Like I said before this story kinda writes itself. Well I hope to hear from you next chapter.

Emotions- Here is chapter eight. Thanks a bunch for your reviews they are always so nice. This chapter wasn't sad, at least I hope not. I don't think it was one of my best chapters but I needed to write it so that It leads of to the next chapter. Which is Spots party. I can't wait to write that, its going to be a lot of fun! Yeah I am trying not to rush into anything, because I need to build up the characters first. If I made Spot and Hanna get together right at the beginning then there really wouldn't be a point to the story. Thanks again. Also I really like your stories, I just haven't had time to review them.

Luv ya lots,

Leila3


	10. The Party

Hey everyone, I am so sorry that I didn't have this chapter posted yesterday. I was forced to go over my aunts house and paint a shed. I got paid for it though so that's a plus. Anyway here is the next chapter it's late at night and I haven't had the chance to go over it, so I know there will be a lot of mistakes. But I hope you enjoy it anyway lol. If you read my story this far you have probably already got used to looking past them. Well keep reviewing and I hope to hear from you soon!

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

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Chapter Nine

I tried to pretend as if I didn't hear Racetrack continuously yelling my name and pounding on my door the next morning. Today was Spots party and I regretted ever offering to go in the first place. If only I had the stamina to push my pride aside and keep my mouth shut for once in my life. If I did I knew that I wouldn't be in half as much of the situations that I was in. Trouble seemed to swarm around me like bee's to honey. If I only had enough strength then I could easily tell Racetrack that I was sick and didn't feel up to the task of attending this party. But I just couldn't give Spot one more reason to ridicule me. I wanted to prove to him that I would be a part of their world whether he wanted me there or not.

Even with my new burst of self confidence I still felt weak and pathetic, as if my entire existence had been for nothing. I knew Spot was probably looking forward to my arrival just so he could find some way to humiliate me. Which made me even less enthusiastic to attend. But I just couldn't let him get the better of me no matter the cost. So I yawned with exhaustion and reluctantly rolled over. Pushing myself up into a sitting position and throwing the covers off of me, I got out of bed. Walking over by my window I looked outside to see what the day was like.

It was still dark but I could just see the sun rising in the distance over the towering buildings beyond. A warm gust of air blew the hair back from my face and I breathed in the fresh sent of the sun flowers that a neighbor was growing on her rooftop. I knew that it was going to be a beautiful day. Too bad I would have to spend it in the company of someone with such an ugly heart.

"Are ya commin' or what?" Racetrack yelled exasperated through the wood. I walked over and opened the door.

"Yeah Race, I'm coming." I smiled at him as he walked inside the room. "What should I wear?"

"If ya really want my opinion. Just something nice. But nuthin' too fancy like ya probably used to wearing. Because ya wanna blend in, not stick out," Racetrack responded.

"Well considering the fact that the majority of the people at this party will be guys, I don't know exactly how well I will be able to fit in," I said laughing. But Racetrack didn't look at all amused. He just shook his head and ran a hand through his dark black hair.

"I have a bad feelin' that this party isn't such a good idea, Doll. Maybe ya shouldn't go," he said.

"It's alright Race. I'm sure everything will be fine. I'll just make sure to keep my mouth shut and find a chair in the corner somewhere so I'll be out of the way," he looked at me apprehensively but finally gave in.

"Just stay by my side, alright? Ya don't know some of the stuff dat happens at Spots parties," I nodded my head obediently. I had never been to a party such as this, but I still had a slight idea of the stuff that goes on.

I rummaged through my dresser and finally found a few dresses that might be suitable for the occasion. "I'm going to try them on, tell me what you think. Go on, turn around," I said twirling my finger in the air. Race looked at me slightly shocked.

"Don't ya want me to leave the room?" he asked.

"It's too complicated. Besides all of the boys are still out there and they would think it strange if you kept walking in and out. So just turn around and don't peak," I stated sternly.

When he turned around I removed my nightgown. I pulled out one of my corsets from the dresser and put it on overtop of my undergarments. Although I had done it many times before I was having trouble connecting the buckles in the back. My mother had just bought this one for me a few months ago. It was a new design sent straight from Paris. In order to make it easier the corset tied in the front and then had six metal buckles in the back so that you wouldn't have to re-lace it every time you put it on. Normally I would have had my maid help me get dressed in the morning but I didn't have that luxury any more.

"Race, I know this is strange but could you help me buckle this corset?" I asked quietly. I didn't exactly feel comfortable with him being in the room while I was changing, let alone seeing me in my undergarments. But what other choice did I have.

I crossed my arms over my chest and felt the heat flush to my face as he turned around. My neckline dipped slightly lower than I felt was appropriate and even though Race was like a brother, he was still a guy. I could tell that he was just as nervous as I for his face I think was even redder than my own.

Race was staring at the wall behind my head and was fidgeting with his hands. I shifted my weight uncomfortably from one foot to another until finally I realized how stupid we were acting. "This is pathetic! We are acting as if I have no clothes on at all," I said and started laughing.

Race began laughing to, "Yeah I guess ya're right."

"Here," I replied as I turned around in order for him to buckle the corset. With my right collar bone still broken I was feeling rather helpless at the moment. I wished there was just one thing I could do on my own.

Once he was finished with the last buckle I turned around and pulled the first dress on overtop of my head. "How could ya breathe in dat thing?" he asked referring to the corset.

"With a lot of practice it becomes quite easy," I replied.

The first dress was rather simple. It had quarter length sleeves that frilled out at the end and was made out of blue and yellow silk. The neck line was squared off and laced up in the front. The skirt of the dress flowed down and brushed the floor.

"Dat one is nice," Race replied. "I think it's perfect," I nodded my head and decided with a look in the mirror that there would be no need for me to try on the others. It fit me perfectly and I looked very nice. But there was nothing about it that would attract any unwanted attention. Well at least not as much as I would have, had I dressed as I would for one of the parties that I was used to attending.

"Yes, I think you are right," I said happily and then I sighed, "It feels good to look like a lady again," I exclaimed.

"Ya always looked like a lady to us," Racetrack replied and I smiled at him.

"Thanks Race," I said walking over and hugging him. I then walked over to the chair and sat down. "But it's just not the same. I am trying to get used to this life…I really am. It's just so hard for me."

"Nobody ever said it was gonna be easy," Race replied as I put on my slippers.

"I know, but you just don't understand what I'm going through. You were raised on the streets Race so you know how to survive. You are used to people treating you like you don't exist. But I grew up in a home were anything I wanted, I got. Every second there were people showering me with compliments and telling me that I was the best. Every girl envied me because of my wealth. I actually believe that the only person in the world who didn't love me, was myself," I replied solemnly as I tried to fix my hair in the mirror.

"I neva thought I would be sayin' this ta someone like you. But I actually feel sorry for ya," Race said sitting down on my bed.

"Please don't. The last thing I need is the pity of another person," I replied. "I'm trying Race; I really am. It's just hard going from having everything in life to having nothing. I know that the boys probably think that I'm just some pathetic, spoiled, little rich girl."

"Nah, we know you's tryin'. Besides I don't think its ya're helplessness that we need ta worry about. Its dat mouth of yours," I laughed slightly and nodded my head.

"Yes, well maybe if certain people would learn some manners. Then there would be no need for me to cause any problems," Even though I said "certain people" Race knew that I was referring to Spot Conlon.

"Yeah well I doubt dat's ever gonna happen," Race replied staunchly as I followed him out the bedroom door. As we reached the stairs Jack came walking out of the washroom drying his hair with a towel.

"Are ya sure ya wanna go, Dollface? 'Cause no one would blame ya if ya backed out. We know you and Spot ain't exactly on _speakin' terms_," I glared at him as if he had just insulted me.

"I have never backed out of anything in my life, Jack Kelly. Nor will I start now. I said I was going to this party and I am sticking by my word. No matter how excruciating this experience will be," Jack knew that my decision was unable to be swayed and so he did not speak one more word of protest. "Besides Spot Conlon is the least of my worries," When I spoke these words I felt the strength in my heart, but it came out weak and feeble.

"Well, we gots ta get going," Racetrack said as we walked down the stairs and out the front door into the bath of warm sunlight.

The streets were packed with people going about there daily lives. All around us was the soft hum of the common society. On our way through the market buyer's yelled out bids trying to get a good bargain while the merchants sold their products for more than half its worth. They talked back and forth, as if in a country auction, until finally the price was beaten down into something that made both sides happy.

smiled softly at a little boy jumping into a mud puddle on the street that was left over from the previous rainy days. I watched the joy in his eyes that came from such a simple sense of happiness and I laughed at the stricken look on his mothers face when she pulled him away as the mud covered the legs of his britches.

Finally we reached the Brooklyn Bridge and I gazed at it in wonder. I had only been to Brooklyn twice when I was but a small child and I had little remembrance of its brilliant structure. I looked over the side once as we were crossing and it only served to ignite my rather large fear of heights. I just grabbed Racetracks arm tightly until we safely reached the opposite side of the bridge.

The moment we stepped onto Brooklyn soil it was as if a barrier was automatically placed up around me. I walked the streets in between Jack and Racetrack, making sure to look calm and controlled. Even though my heart was pounding hard in my chest and sweat glistened on my forehead, I held my chin high. I found out that the Brooklyn Lodging House was only a street away from the bridge and was located on the shores of the river.

"Rememba to stay wit me," Racetrack said as we stepped onto the dock. I nodded my head but didn't say a word. I would never admit it but I was terrified of the night that lay before me.

There were a few boys hanging around outside the lodging house on the dock smoking cigarettes and talking. They yelled comments to Jack who replied coolly in an authoritative voice. It was the tone that he used when he wanted to prove to everyone that he was in charge.

When we opened the door and walked inside there was a large spacious room with old fishing nets hanging on the walls. Tables were spread out around and sitting at them were multiple boys gambling and fooling around. Like I had thought, the majority of the crowd was men. But I noticed a small group of raunchy looking females prowling around. Not to my surprise Rose was among them.

She caught my eyes and smirked maliciously as Racetracks earlier comment entered my mind. _I think they broke up because they were just too much alike. _Rose's eyes flashed dangerously in my direction and I shivered slightly as Spots face appeared in my mind.

I was sticking so close to Racetrack that I knew some of the boys must have thought that we were a couple. But at the moment I really didn't care. I knew Race didn't care either because it was a way to keep me safe. If the boys thought that I was his girl that meant that I wasn't free game and they wouldn't mess with me as much.

We followed Jack over to a table in the corner where to my dismay sat Spot and a few of his cronies. He had on those same red suspenders and held on tightly to that gold tipped cane. Everything about Spot irritated me for some unknown reason. I held hatred towards him so deep that you would have thought that it had built up over many long years. When really I had only known him for a week and a half.

I did seem to notice that when he was angry his eyes were like ice that could freeze your insides. But when he seemed to be happy they burned with a hidden flame. He acts as if he hates the world and yet he thrives on being a leader over others. As if it gives him something worth living for. He isn't a leader like Jack who truly cares about the boys he looks after. Spot takes care of Brooklyn because that makes him the best at something. He merely does it so that he can be labeled a somebody, rather than nobody.

"Hey, Jack…Race, glad ya could make it," Spot said as he took the cigar out of his mouth and dealt his two new companions into the game. "So Doll, ya made it," he said casually to me.

"Yeah I guess I did," I replied as Race pulled up a chair beside him at the table and I sat down.

The game seemed to take go on forever. Eventually I decided to get up and stretch a little. As I walked around I noticed a boy in the far corner of the room sitting alone at a table. In his tan hands he held a small brown book. His face was deep in concentration and his dark blonde hair fell into his face slightly as he craned his neck to read. I decided that he looked the least hostile out of all the kids so I walked over to introduce myself.

The boy didn't look up until a soft shadow fell upon the words he was reading. When our eyes met I smiled sweetly. "Do you mind if I join you?" I asked.

He stared at me for a few minutes looking me over and then smiled in return. "Not at all," he replied.

"I'm sorry to bother you it's just that I came here with my friends Race and Jack but their in the middle of a game and I haven't had the chance to talk to anyone for hours," when I said this the boy just shrugged his shoulders.

"It ain't no problem," He replied moving his chair over and pulling up another one so I could sit down. "Now what's ya're name anyway?" He asked.

"It's Hanna, but the boys call me Dollface or Doll for short," I said and the boy smirked.

"Me names John West or Booker," he said, "But pardon me Doll, ya don't exactly seem to be the type to be hangin' out wit dis type a crowd."

"Well your right Mr. West. But that's a rather long story," I replied.

"We gots time and by the looks of dat game; da night is still young," John replied motioning over to Spot and his buddies.

"Yes, I do not doubt that. But my past is something that I do not wish to venture into at the moment if you don't mind," I said coolly, crossing my arms over my chest and leaning back in the chair.

"Don't go getting all agitated I was only wonderin'," John laughed.

"Yes, well if I do say so you don't exactly fit in yourself, sitting over here all alone. I don't think that I've seen you talk to one other person the entire night," He laughed at my observations.

"Yeah da boys know not ta disturb me when I'm readin'. Dat is how I got my nickname. But ya're right, I don't exactly enjoy these get tagethers that Spot holds annually. The same thing happens every time. All da newsies meet here where they smoke and gamble all night. Then they bring out da beer and deys don't go home until all da moneys gone or somebody passes out."

Of course John had been correct and we ended up talking long into the night. He told me all about the novels he had read and then he listened intently as I spoke of the library I had been to as a child that held over 1000 books. When I was in the middle of a heated discussion trying to persuade John that there was significance to romance stories, I got an uneasiness that someone was watching me. When I looked up I saw Spot staring at me from across the room.

As I sat there staring at him in return it was like everything else seemed to fade away. I could hear John's voice as if in the distance but that was fading to. My skin was becoming warm and my mouth dry. Once again that same feeling was rising in my stomach. But I neither welcomed these feelings nor did I wish to feel them anymore. But as I went to tear my eyes away I found it rather difficult. Eventually John brought me out of my daze.

"Doll, are ya listening?" he asked.

I turned my head quickly and starred at the boy sitting next to me. Hoping that he didn't notice who I had been staring at. "I'm sorry John it's just that I'm so tired. I feel as if I am unable to keep my eyes open any longer."

To my surprise he just laughed. "Don't worry I know how ya feel."

"Thanks," I said then I stood up, "I'm going to go look for something to drink, then I'm going to try and convince Racetrack to leave. It was nice meeting you," I replied.

"Same here," John said and I turned to leave. But he grabbed my good arm to stop me. "Do ya think we could meet again sometime?" he asked.

"Of course we can. You should stop by Manhattan one day. Because I really doubt I will be returning to Brooklyn any time soon," He nodded his head and then picked up his book to continue reading.

I carefully made my way around the room trying to find anything to drink. But all I located was half empty bottles of beer. I decided that it would just be best to go find Race and head home. I turned around and ended up running straight into somebody's chest. When I realized who it was I jumped backwards in surprise.

"So Doll how'd ya like me party?" Spot said as he leaned one arm on an empty table.

"It was very umm…interesting," I replied nonchalantly. Then I went to walk around him but he stood up straight and blocked my way.

"Ya know, you're kinda cute," Spot said as he reached up a hand to brush my cheek and staggered a little bit forward. He was close enough that I could smell the sent of cheep booze and tobacco on his breath.

"You're drunk," I replied as I backed up a little. A cold chill went throughout my entire body as I became slightly afraid. Over the years I have had many bad experiences with men and alcohol. I quickly looked over at the table where Race and Jack were both sitting but there backs were to me.

"I'm only a little drunk," Spot said smirking.

"I'm leaving," I stated and then went to walk around him but he blocked my way once more.

"Ya know, your one of da few goils who have ever turned me down," he said as his words slurred slightly. Then he began walking closer to me. I continued to back up until I ran into the wall and Spot didn't stop until his mouth was next to my ear. "And I don't like being turned down," he whispered dangerously.

I quickly went to slide to my right but he slammed his hand against the wall preventing me from moving. I tried again on the left but he did the same thing. I looked around the room trying to see if anyone would help me but we were now in an alcove that was slightly secluded from the rest of the room. "Spot, you're drunk you don't know what you're doing," I said my voice quivering.

"I know exactly what I'm doing," He replied and the next thing I knew his mouth was on my own. I could taste the alcohol as Spot pressed me hard against the wall. A single tear slid down my pale cheek as I metal object jabbed into my back. I tried to get away but he wouldn't let me go but eventually I managed to push him back slightly. Before I knew what I was doing I backhanded him hard across the face. Even though it was with my left hand Spot staggered backwards into the table. My knuckles were stinging as small welts appeared on my skin.

It didn't take long before Spot regained his composure. Then he grabbed my left wrist and pinned me hard against the wall. But he didn't try and kiss me this time. "Please, just leave me alone," I said as more tears slid down my cheeks.

"Your lucky dat you's a goil or else I woulda soaked ya by now," He said as his blue eyes bore holes into me. I could feel the brusies forming on my wrists as his grip only tightened. "Ya don't belong here," Spot said venomously as he shoved me back against the wall and let my wrist go.

Without saying a word I quickly pushed my way past him. I could see Rose in the corner of the room and if I wasn't mistaken she had a smile on her face. I practically ran up to the Race and Jack. "I want leave," I said forcefully.

"Doll, what happened?" Race asked. To my relief I could tell that he hadn't been drinking.

"I want to leave now," I said again. Race stood up and nodded his head.

He turned to Jack who was looking at me concerned. "I'm taking Doll back to da Lodging House."

"Alright Race," Jack said sitting his cards down. "But I think I'll be stayin' here tonight, I'm in no condition ta be goin' anywhere," Jack replied.

Race said goodbye to a few of the other boys before he put his hand gently on my back and led me out the door. To my relief he didn't speak to me the entire way home. Even if he would have I don't think I was in any mood to talk. That's why Race was such a good friend because he knows when to just leave things be.

In my heart I knew that tomorrow Spot would regret what he had done and possibly even apologize if that was within his limits. Because that is how he works. He makes you furious at him and then he does something to make up for it the next day. But I just kept repeating the scene over and over in my mind and yet I still couldn't believe what had just happened. I don't know if I would ever be able to look at him the same way again. My hands were shaking and the tears on my face had dried when we finally reached the doors to the Lodging House.

****

Thank you to:

Reaghann- I am so happy to hear from you again. Don't worry I understand about being busy. I have been so busy lately too that I am surprised that I had this chapter written this early. I somehow squeezed in time. I know what you mean about the whole thing with her wearing a skirt that comes down to her knees. But when I looked up a bunch of pictures from that time period, in one of the pictures with two girl newsies they were both wearing skirts that came down to there knees. So that's where I got that outfit from. I don't know if its correct or not I'm just going by the picture. Well I hope you enjoyed this chapter, review whenever you can and let me know what you think.

Padfootismyhero-Hey! I think you are a great writer to! Well I answered your question about Rose. She was in this chapter but not a lot. You will be seeing her a lot more throughout the story. Yes, I love Spot so much. But I felt bad because I had to make him a little evil in this chapter. But things will get better. I wasn't as happy with this chapter. I have been feeling like I've been slacking off, I don't know. But I hope you enjoyed it. Hope to hear from you soon!

LenaJade- Sorry for the spelling mistakes. I give up trying to detect them all, lol. So I am going to apologies for future spelling mistakes that will be in every chapter from now until the end. Well I am glad that you enjoyed it at least and I look forward to your reviews.

NadaZimri- Yes I do love your story! You shouldn't have self esteem issues because you are a good writer. But I do know what you mean. Personally I think I suck at writing, especially with all of my spelling and grammar mistakes. That's why I'm so happy that there are people like you who like my story. Nope, sorry you can't trade wall's with me. It took me forever to get all of those pictures of Spot. But if I could copy it I would send you one, lol. Yet somehow I don't think its possible. Review and let me know what you thought.

Splashey- I just love your reviews! They are always so positive and make me happy. But yeah Rose is a hoe, she will be in the story a lot more. Yeah I know Spot was so sweet when he stuck up for her, that's why I felt bad about making him mean in this chapter. But you know how he is, one second he's nice the next he's not. Who knows! Anyway I hope you liked this chapter. I had more planned for it but I couldn't make it that long. Well review when you can.

Coin- Yes, I like Medda too. But I don't know how well I will be able to write her character because I don't know much about her. So I hope that I do a good job. Thanks a bunch for beta'ing my chapters. I am so busy that I haven't had a chance to post them yet, but I will. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Let me know if you can beta this one too. I will have to start sending them to you before I post them. Its just that I have been getting a little behind in writing.

Luv ya lots,

BlackWiltedRose


	11. On the Job

Here is chapter 10! I can't believe I have actually gotten this far. When I started this I didn't even think I was going to get past three chapters at the most. But I hope you enjoy this one. It isn't my greatest but I still enjoyed writing is. Chapter 11 will be posted next weekend. Keep reviewing and let me know what you think.

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

****

Chapter Ten

As I laid there that night I thought about many things from my past. I brought back the painful memories of my parents and the times we spent together when I was a child. I remembered my house and the garden my father had built me in the backyard by the pond. I could smell the fresh sent of the newly washed linens on my four poster bed and see the faces of all the people who had once been apart of my life.

Then I looked upon the present day and shuddered as reality washed over me with the fierceness of a tidal wave. I was drowning in the sorrows of my life feeling completely helpless and unbearably alone. There seemed to be no escape as each day a new troublesome circumstance was weighted down upon me.

Every time I closed my eyes to sleep I would see Spots face. His voice lingered in my ears and the bruise on my wrist ached ever so often. He haunted my every move and my every step. There was no escaping his presence. I knew I would get no rest that long and dreary night so I snuck out my window and made my way up to the rooftop. I would not be heard because most of the boys had not returned from Brooklyn and those who had were to drunk to care.

To my surprise I found Racetrack sitting with his feet dangling over the edge of the building. He turned around and looked at me questioningly. We stood there staring at each other for a few minutes before he smiled weakly. "Ya shouldn't be up here; da roof is a dangerous place."

"Neither should you but here we are," I replied and walked over beside him. There was as short pause but it wasn't an uncomfortable silence. Finally Racetrack spoke.

"I come up here every so often when I want ta think," he said looking up at the sky. "It's a nice night."

I tilted my head upwards and watched the stars shimmering in the dark black oblivion. I felt as if I could get lost in it forever just float away from the troubles and sorrows of life. But unfortunately I faced the fate of every human to remain bound to the cold, hard earth. To wait until my time has come when I will be buried beneath its deep rich soil to rot away for the rest of eternity. Lately I had found myself wondering if I should just end it now and meet my fate earlier than was planned. But something deep within my heart was holding me back.

"Race," I asked as I tore my eyes away and looked at my friend. "What was your life like?"

He looked at me for a few minutes and then motioned for me to sit down beside him. I did as he asked and then waited expectantly. Racetrack took a deep breath and then sighed. "There isn't much ta tell. Me parents died when I was seven years old and I've been living here ever since."

"What were your parents like?" I asked with sincerity.

A slight glaze appeared over his eyes as he stared out across the skyline. "I don't remember much about dem. Just that I used ta go to da horseracing track wit me fatha a lot. He was da one who taught me how ta gamble," Race laughed as he looked back on this fond memory. "Dey were respectable people. Not wealthy like your parents but well known around da town. Me mudda…she used ta cook for da local church. Every Sunday she would make me get all dressed up to go sit in some room where an old man stood and talked about god for an hour. She was a beautiful person and was always helping people. I don't think I ever met anyone like her. Actually ya remind me of her sometimes," Race replied and I smiled.

"They sound like they were wonderful people," I said and he nodded.

"Now tell me about your parents," Racetrack stated. "It helps ta remember dem sometimes." I still didn't feel up to talking about them but somehow I found myself pouring my heart out to him.

"It's just…that there isn't much to talk about, because really I don't think I knew them all that well. I don't have any fond memories with them like your parents… only because of them," I said sadly.

"Yes, but I'd still like to hear about dem," Race replied.

"Well my father was always working or at a business related function. The only time I had the chance to see him was at dinner every night when we would all sit around and discuss my future prospects. Sometimes I would see complete strangers on the street more often than I would see my own father. My mother was a very high maintenance women who loved to shop. It was simple for her of course because all she did was stay at home and run the household. As for me I was free to do as I wished most of the time except for an hour out of each day which was reserved for me and my mother to talk about my life. If I shall need a new wardrobe or who's house I would be having tea over that night. It sounds selfish but it was as if their entire world revolved around me. I couldn't even ask my father how his day had gone without being scolded for talking more than I should," I sighed and looked over at Race.

"Was ya life really dat bad?" Racetrack asked.

"Sometimes yes, sometimes no. I was rich of course which meant that I never had to want for anything. I had clean clothing to change into every morning and a full stomach every night. So in that aspect I was fairly well off. But to be rich means to be alone. Because everyone is so consumed by there own problems and greed that they don't have the time to care about others. I had no friends to confide in or parents that I was permitted to talk to. I was raised that only the strong survive. Which meant that if I was falling apart and couldn't hold onto my position in society there would be no one there to help me back on my feet. It just meant that another girl would come along who was stronger or in my case, more rich and beautiful who would take my place."

"You were right. I mean my life was hard but I wouldn't be payin' ta trade lives with you either." Race said sincerely. I laughed and patted him on the back as I got to my feet.

I rolled my shoulder around in a circular motion to try and shack out the stiffness that I had acquired during the night. "Well the sun is rising which means that I must go get ready. I am starting my first day working for Medda," Race just nodded his head.

"Alright, I'll be stayin' up here for a little. If ya need anything just let me know," I kissed him on the cheek quickly and went back into my room.

It didn't take long before I was yelling up for Racetrack to help me. "Thanks again Race," I replied laughing as he was helping to tie my shoelaces once more. "I don't know what I would do without you."

"You would probably be walkin' around without any corset on and untied shoelaces." I laughed again as I threw a shawl over my shoulders. "But ya don't need ta go humbling me all da time."

"Don't worry I won't," I said sarcastically and Race pretended as if he was offended, with a mock expression of humiliation on his face. He huffed, "Fine den I'll just leave ya to walk to Medda's all alone and I hope ya get kidnapped."

I laughed again and shoved his shoulder. "Oh Race; I was just kidding around with you. You're the best friend a girl could have."

"Now dat's more like it! Let's get goin' because ya don't wanna be late for ya first day on da job."

We decided to walk out the fire escape so that we wouldn't disturb any of the boys who didn't have to wake up for another hour and a half. The day was cool and quiet as we made our way to the theater. I wondered in my mind what my job would be like and how well I would do. I really had never worked before so I didn't exactly know what I was capable of doing. I just hoped that I would be kept very busy so that I wouldn't have the time to think about the night before.

A soft pain throbbed in my wrist as I looked down at the purple and black bruise. When I looked up I noticed Race staring at it with a look of concern on his face. Finally he asked the question that I had been waiting for. "Doll, what happened yesterday?"

"It was nothing," I said trying to act serious but I knew that Race could see through me.

"It was Spot wasn't it?" He asked but it was a question that he already knew the answer to.

"Like I said before, it was nothing. We just had another one of our stupid arguments. I don't even remember what it was about," I replied in fake sincerity.

"Look at ya wrist! How could ya say dat it's nuthin'?" Race said forcefully.

"It was an accident," I spoke in reply. "It was just me being clumsy."

But Race just laughed. "An' how did ya hurt it then?"

This is where he caught me. "I…umm… I," but I couldn't think of any possible excuse that would be efficient enough for him to believe. So I just gave up and looked at the ground.

"Ya can't keep protecting him Doll," Race said as he put his arm around my shoulder.

But I shoved it off angrily. "I'm not protecting Spot Conlon. Besides I doubt he needs protecting from anybody. I just don't feel like making a big deal out of something so small and inconvenient. We had a disagreement, that's all. The same as we have since the first day we met each other. He was just drunk yesterday so things got a little out of hand. But it wasn't that bad I was just a little worked up, that's all," Race gave me that same disbelieving look but let it go.

"Alright but just do me a favor and stay away from him from now on. Spot's dangerous when he's angry and I've neva seen any goil make him as angry as you do." Race said shaking his head but there was a small smile placed on his face.

When we made it to the doors of the theater Racetrack said goodbye. He told me that he would be back at 10:00 to see how my day went and to walk me home. I thanked him again and went inside. I entered the old wooden doors and made my way into a beautiful lobby with red carpets and tapestries. It looked the same as it had two days ago when I had first come here with Race.

I walked up the rather large staircase and into the actual stage area. There were a few people scurrying around setting up tables and chairs. Other's were sweeping the floors and cleaning out the trash cans. On the stage there was a funny looking man in red suspenders playing a harpsichord. I looked around and spotted a thin, frizzy haired brunette girl with a rather pleasant persona. I walked over to her and tapped her on the shoulder. She turned to me and smiled politely.

"Excuse me, but I am suppose to be starting as a waitress today. Could you tell me were I should go because I don't know who I am supposed to talk to," the girl's smile just widened.

"Oh! Of course, you must be Hanna. My name is Olivia I am a waitress here also. Medda told us all about you. Here, come this way. She will be glad to know that you've shown up," The girl's voice was slightly higher pitched than my own and her eyes were a dark hazel. She wore a light brown dress with a white apron tied around her waist.

I tried not to stare but this had been the first time I have spoken to a girl my own age in many days. Except for Rose, although I wouldn't exactly call that a conversation. I followed Olivia up a few stairs onto the stage and then behind the curtains.

In the back of the theater there were many people walking around. Some in costumes that I found rather strange but I just kept my mouth shut. Finally we made it to a door in the back of the building and Olivia ushered me inside. There was Medda walking around the room in a bright pink dress. When she saw me she smiled brightly. "You came!"

"Of course, but I don't know exactly how much help I will be," I said honestly. Medda just laughed and put her arm around my shoulders.

"Don't worry dear. If you do your best I'm sure you'll be fine. But since your arm is injured I don't think it would be wise to start you off carrying drinks. So you will begin my taking the orders and bringing them back here to Olivia who will carry them out to the customers." I just nodded my head nervously.

"I will try my hardest," I replied.

"That's all I ask of my employees. Come dear, don't be so afraid. You may find that there will be many more uses for you around here," I smiled graciously as I followed her out the door.

Medda left and Olivia showed me were the kitchen was located. She also introduced me to a few very interesting people all of whom were most kind to me. The first show was to start in an hour so I helped as much as possible around the theater in order to get things set up.

"Here, now put this on," Olivia handed me a brown dress much like her own except that the apron I wore was a dark emerald green.

My hands began to shake as I heard the sound of people filing into there seats and the soft sound of music playing. Depressing thoughts began running through my head of failing and disappointing yet another person who had risked giving me a chance to succeed at something. Of continuing on with the life that I had been so willing to leave behind.

"Come on we must get going," Olivia replied as she ushered me through the wooden doors.

I had found that all of my fears disappeared as I made my way through the massive crowd. With a fake smile on my face and laughter in my voice. It felt as if I was back at my house hosting a rather large dinner party.

"Would you gentleman care for a drink?" I asked sweetly to the first table of men that I had been ordered to serve.

"Well sweetheart as a matter of fact we do," said an old man with shoulder length gray hair and a long beard. "You must be new."

"It just so happens I am," I responded brightly.

"Well we hope ta be seeing more of your sweet face around here," I tried not to blush as I thanked him and went to find Olivia. But for the rest of the day I had a smile on my face more genuine than it had been in many days._ Maybe I would be able to do this after all._

The hours flew by and soon the last act was on the stage. I had only one more table to serve before it was time for me to leave. I was tired and my feet were aching but when I saw the familiar faces sitting at the table in the corner, I laughed loudly.

Staring up at me was Racetrack, Mush, Jack and Kid Blink. Walking over I leaned up against the wall casually. "How may I help you gentleman," I asked.

"Ya see were lookin' for dis goil. She's about my height, blonde hair, kinda sassy. Have ya seen here around?" Race asked.

"Nope sorry can't say I have, but I'll go and check for you." I replied sarcastically as turned around to leave but Race grabbed my hand.

"In dat case I guess you'll just have ta do." he said pulling me backwards.

"And what exactly are you planning on doing with me?" I asked leading into his little joke.

"Well ya know we could go back to my place," He raised his eye brows and nodded his head towards the door. I started laughing and shoved him playfully.

"Enough…now hold on a minute while I go tell Medda that I'm leaving." The boys were still laughing when I returned.

"So how was ya first day on da job?" Mush asked.

"It was good actually," I replied joyfully as we walked down the street.

I was so happy that I started singing a song. The boys stared at me strangely and asked if I was all right. But I was more than alright because I had finally found an escape from the pain of my life. I had been so consumed with work that Spot Conlon had completely slipped my mind. I guess that it was exactly what I needed to rekindle my hope that there still remained even the slightest bit of happiness in the world.

****

Thank you to:

Padfootismyhero-I swear, your reviews make me so happy. I am very glad you enjoyed the last chapter. I was afraid that I rushed it to much but I guess not. That's funny that you were going to have a scene like that in your new story. I know that this chapter wasn't that good but I still hope you enjoyed it. It was sort of like a filler chapter. Thanks again and I hope to hear from you soon.

Coin- You finally get me the beta'd chapters, which by the way you did a great job and now I haven't had the time to post them. Don't worry I will get them up soon. It's just that I barely have time to even post the new chapters. Review and let me know what you think of this chapter. Yeah If I was Hanna I would have beat the crap out of him like you said. But I decided it would be best to leave that out of the story. Oh and you will be seeing a lot more of Booker later on.

NadaZimri- Yeah I know…I just had to have Race be like a brother figure to Hanna. Because he is just such a fun character to write and it just kinda turned out that way. I felt bad about making Spot drunk in that chapter. Its just that I had to make Hanna hate him somehow. But don't worry she wont hate him forever. I know this chapter wasn't as good as the other one's I just had to have a kind of filler chapter. To get her started working at the theater. I hope it wasn't to bad, review and tell me what you think.

Splashey- That's ok that you didn't have time to review. Like I said to everyone else. I have been so busy lately also. I have finals for school and my teachers have been working me to death. I barely had enough time to write the chapters. Let alone read other fan fiction stores. Well I hope you like this chapter and don't worry there will be more Spot to come. Hanna won't stay mad at him forever. Keep reviewing and I'll keep updating for you.

Emotions- Yes, I was rather disappointed in Spot myself. But I had to write it not matter how upset it made me. Lol I hope you like this chapter. Oh and its ok that you haven't had the time to review before. I understand completely. I have been so busy with school and everything that its hard to get the chapters written.

Luv ya lots,

BlackWiltedRose


	12. Realizations

YEAH! I am at chapter 11. This one was very fun to write. Its when Spot starts to really come into the picture. Because I know that there really hasn't been much of him in the story. I just wanted to build up my character before I starting really getting into the story line. Now I can start to have the real fun. I hope you keep reading and remember to review!

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

Chapter Eleven

Four days passed by and soon going to work became just another part of my daily routine. I was making a decent amount of money at the Boudville theater and I had the opportunity to meet many interesting people. Medda said I was a natural and would have no problem taking on a more permanent position once my arm had healed completely. Me and Olivia had become good friends and I began to look forward to our lighthearted conversations. Yet what made me the most ecstatic was the simple pleasure and pure satisfaction of knowing that I was surviving on my own. With the deepest determination I had managed to make a complete transformation into someone that I could be proud of.

But as I became more independent I found that I had begun secluding myself from all of my friends. After Spots party I didn't feel up to facing the rest of the boys in the Lodging House. Many different rumors begun being passed around about me and Spot. Some were completely harmless and others made me cringe to even think of such things. By now everyone had seen the bruises on my wrist and instead of asking me what had really happened they came up with there own conclusions. Even though I knew that whenever someone said something disgraceful Race and Mush would set them straight, it still didn't prevent me from having the uncomfortable notion of knowing that people were talking behind my back.

So I just stopped communicating with everyone all together. The only people I spoke with were Race, Jack, Mush and Kid Blink. Some days they would still stop by work to see a show and visit me. But many morning's I just snuck out by myself not wanting to deal with all of the conflicts, only to be lectured by Jack when I returned on why its dangerous for me to be walking alone on the streets. I knew he was right of course but for some reason I didn't care.

Spot stopped by the Lodging House of few days before and I knew he was looking for me. But I had managed to sneak out my bedroom window and run up onto the roof. I had done the same thing when he had returned to talk to Jack earlier this morning. The boys knew that I didn't want to speak with him so they wouldn't mention where I was. Even though Racetrack knew that I hid up on the roof. So it surprised me when Spot appeared over my left shoulder as I was sitting on the old smoke stack to the right of the dried up garden reading a book. I screamed and jumped off the pile of burnt red bricks.

"What are you doing here?" I practically yelled at Spot. I looked over at Race who was standing by the fire escape and he shrugged his shoulders guiltily.

"I have my ways," Spot said casually as he hooked his thumbs behind his red suspenders and slouched slightly making him look rather intimidating yet refrained. As if he had these types of confrontations every day.

"Well if you'll excuse me I have things to do," I replied staunchly as I walked around him and took a step towards the stairs. But Spot grabbed my arm to stop me. I panicked slightly as I pulled my arm away quickly. "Don't touch me!" I yelled and I seen Race take a step forward. But Spot put up a hand to stop him.

"Cool it Race, I aint gunna hurt er'. I just wanna talk dats all." Race stopped moving forward and relaxed a bit but he still seemed rather unnerved. But even though Spot was talking to Race he was starring directly at me the whole time. I wanted to pull away, to turn around and leave but his eyes held me captive. They were icy blue today with a slight bit of grey and I noticed the tiny sliver of yellow that adorned the center.

My hands were shaking once more and that rather queasy feeling in my stomach returned. I deeply despised myself for becoming so weak in his presence. It's just being around someone so full of chorizema and self confidence intimidated me. As we stood there starring at each other I began to wonder what was really going on in his head. I wondered if the fearless Newsie was really as self-centered as he appeared. Or if he had little things about himself that he secretly hated. Was there really a heart behind the many layers of fire and ice that was his soul?

"There is nothing that you have to say that I would wish to hear," I snapped angrily. As my brain felt one thing and my mouth said another.

"Look Doll, just give me a chance to apologize." Spot said and it might have just been in my head but he sounded a little bit desperate.

"Why should I?" I asked as I began feeling the anger slowly overpowering the strange warmth boiling in my chest.

"Because it's da only time you'll ever hear it. I never apologize," Spot said snidely crossing his arms over his chest and leaning up against a wall.

"Then why break your record on the account of me?"

"Because I was wrong," Spot said reluctantly. I think I saw Race's mouth fall open slightly as a look of pure shock washed over his face. Then it was replaced with a rather entertaining smirk.

"Well that's a first…did you hear that Race? The all powerful Spot Conlon actually admitted he was wrong. Isn't that something?" I said sarcastically my voice full of triumph.

"Don't tempt me goily or I might just take dat back." Spot replied walking closer to me. "Now will ya talk to me or what?" He asked impatiently.

I thought about it for a moment and then decided that it wouldn't hurt to hear his pathetic excuse. I mean Jack is friends with him so that means he must have some decency or maybe it was just because they understood each other. I didn't know. But I hesitantly walked over to Racetrack and said "Could you go downstairs for a minute. I guess I'll listen to what he's got to say." Then I leaned forward a little and whispered. "Do me a favor though and don't leave my room incase I need to yell down for you." Race nodded his head and left.

Then I turned around to Spot who still stood starring at me with unblinking eyes. "Are you really dat afraid of me?" he asked sounding a little more restrained than he normally was.

"I'm not afraid of you, I just don't trust you." I replied walking over and returning to my seat on the smoke stack.

"Well I guess ya have every right ta be angry," Spot quickly looked down at my wrist which I hesitantly placed behind my back and then up into my eyes once more. "I didn't mean ta hurt ya Doll. I just kinda lost control."

I looked back at the boy standing in front of me and all of a sudden he didn't look so threatening anymore. He wasn't the arrogant king of Brooklyn or the self-centered leader I had fought with before. Spot was just a young man who was trying to have retribution for his actions. I had expected this confrontation and literally planned out of all the stuff that I would say to him. But somehow the anger wasn't there anymore, the force behind my hateful comments no longer existed. So I could not bring myself to say what I had felt for many days. Instead I lashed out angrily.

"Your right! I do have every reason to hate you for what you put me through. For every hurtful despicable thing you've said to me and all of the problems you've caused. I just want to throw your apology back in your face and tell you to leave. But I can't do that!" I yelled agitatedly.

"Why can't you?" Spot asked as he held a strange expression on his face that I couldn't read.

"I just cant," I said looking solemnly down at the ground. I ran my hands through my thick blonde curls and shook my head. " I…I just don't know!"

"Ya don't know what?" he asked pushing me into an answer.

"Why that no matter what you do and how angry you make me. I can't hate you!" I replied as I looked once more up into his eyes. Then I watched as he became rather ill at ease and he seemed slightly confused. I don't think he expected that response, actually I think he was waiting for me to yell and scream. But not for me to tell him that I wasn't upset.

Yet I was just as disturbed as himself. For all of a sudden realization washed over me. In the last few moments I had finally found the answers to all of the questions that had been plaguing my mind. I finally excepted the fact that there was something about Spot that attracted me to him. I think it was because he was so very different than myself. I think I looked at him as a new horizon or a difficult challenge to overcome.

I knew that I didn't hate Spot but in a way I was afraid of him. I was scared of what he was physically capable of doing to me. But most of all I was afraid of the strange feelings that I had when he was around. I knew in mind that there could never be anything between us and that it was most likely just a strange infatuation. But somehow I realized that I could no longer lie to my heart.

Spot began pacing back and forth pulling at his sling shot. With his eye narrowed and his head bowed slightly. I watched him for a moment and then he stopped in front of me. "Well its up to you, whether or not ya wanna forgive me."

"I'll have to think about it." I replied casually. I didn't want to give in so soon and act as if I didn't have any self-respect whatsoever.

Then Spot started fiddling with his suspenders again which I found to be a rather annoying habit of his. But to my surprise, he looked actually nervous about something. Then he spoke. "How bout' I make it up ta ya. I'll take ya out ta dinner sometime. A day when da headline is good and I make a decent amount of money sellin papes."

I sat there for a moment thinking it over. I remembered everything that Race had warned me about and I knew that Spot was a smooth talker. But he looked so vulnerable standing there asking me out to dinner. I knew that it must have took a lot of strength for him to apologize to me. So I guess that deserved a little recognition. "I don't know…"

"I really aint dat bad of a guy," Spot replied. "Ya could even ask me friends."  
"Wow, you actually have friends?" I said sarcastically.

He just smirked and replied "Yeah I got friends."

"Well as I said before. I do not know. I will have to wait and see just how well we can get along. Ask me again in a few days and you will have your answer." I stood up and walked around Spot. "Now it is almost time for me to go to work. So I will talk with you again another time."

"You…working? Now it's my turn to be surprised." I just laughed and made my way downstairs.

Race was sitting by the window when I came down and I nodded that everything was all right. He just shook his head and stood up off the chair. "I'm tellin ya Doll, you don't want anything to do wit him."

"I figured you were listening to our conversation." I smiled. "Do trust me Race. I know the type of person Spot is and I won't have any more contact with him than is necessary. But what else was I supposed to do? It had been the first time he had treated me decently since the day we met. You asked me to stop upsetting Spot and I plan on doing so. But if it means actually being civilized with him then that's the steps I will be forced to take."

Race just shrugged his shoulders and pulled out a cigar from his back pocket. He lit it casually and placed it in his mouth. With a puff of smoke he replied "I'm just trying to warn ya."

"I know and I am taking your warnings very seriously. But there is nothing else for me to do." I took one quick look into the mirror and then made my way out the bedroom door into the bunkroom. Boots walked by and tipped his hat in greeting but didn't speak a word. Some of the other boys felt just as uncomfortable around me as I did around them. Most of the newsies just ignored me whenever possible. I think they thought that I was more hassle than was worth it.

After I washed up a little bit and went to the bathroom, I walked downstairs and began getting ready to leave. But before I could walk out the door Kloppman came out and stopped me. I turned around to the old man and smiled. "I did remember to pay you this week, didn't I?"

"Oh yes, yes you did. A letter came for you this mornin." he handed me a crisp white envelope and then walked back into his office. Race came up next to me and starred at the letter just as confused as I was.

"Who's it from?" he asked questioningly.

"I don't know," I said as I turned it over and broke the seal. Inside was a rather proper looking letter written on a very expensive stationary. It read:

Dear Hanna,

My name is Ronald Grimmuald and as I have just been informed it seems that you and I are of the same kin. I know that this must have came as quiet a shock to you when you first heard this bit of information. But I assure you that I was in the same state of affairs. Even though I had never truly known my father I share every bit of sympathy with you on his tragic death.

As you know I have fortunately inherited our fathers estate which you have lived on for many years and surely must be fond of. Do not feel discouraged, for me and my wife Lydia intend to change very little on the property and keep all of the hired help. So if you ever come to visit, which I hope that you shall, you may think of it as the same home that you have know only with new caretakers.

To see that we speak the truth, the lady of the house and I would like to invite you to dinner three days from now. If you do not wish to attend then we shall not be offended. For you must be grieving severely from your losses. But I greatly wish to meet you and talk about matters concerning our father. I hope to see you soon.

Sincerely,

Ronald Grimmuald.

By the end of the letter my hands were shaking and the flat piece of paper was now creased. So this was the brother that I have heard nothing about and from what he had written he knew nothing of my existence either. I was slightly relieved that he didn't seem like a crude tyrant as I had been dreading. But even his kindness was looked past as I bit back the anger and jealously boiling in my stomach.

He was right, I had grown up in that house. Even though it had been only a summer home I had spent many nights there as a child. What right did he have to just come and take over? Him and this wife of his! Then he had the audacity to call her the Lady of the House.

All I could think of was how she would be sleeping in my mothers bed and sitting in the same chair that my mother had sat in at dinner. Eating off of my mothers good china and welcoming guests into the home that my mother had worked so hard to make comfortable. It was my parents house and it would remain my parents house for as long as it stood on its foundation.

"I'm not going," I said as I crinkled the letter up and threw it on the floor. 

"Who was it from," Race asked concerned seeing the saddened expression on my face.

"It was from my brother." I replied as I tightened the sling on my arm with a little more force than was necessary.

"What did he want?"

"To invite me to dinner at _his_ new home." I spat out venomously. I began pacing around looking for my shawl before I lost control and slammed my hand hard against the wall. Then I turned to Racetrack. "What right does he have to call it his house. It was my parents house…my house. He didn't even know my father."

My sudden outburst caught the attention of a few newsies who starred at me like I was insane. Race walked over and put a reassuring hand on my shoulder. "I know its not fair Doll. But its how things work."

"Ha! And then he expects me to sit and have a conversation with him when I can't even stand to hear his name. I not going to have dinner with him. Because I will never wish to look upon that house as long as someone other than my parents are living in it." I replied stubbornly.

"Couldn't ya give him a chance," Race asked cautiously as if he expected me to lash out any second.

"Why should I?" I screamed. " Just because I had the misfortune of being born a women, he has the right to come and take everything I have ever know. Not only did I lose my parents and my home, but I lost my dignity as well. This man…this stranger stole my life from beneath me. What respect should I show him. He has his money, his house and his wonderful life. But he still needs the satisfaction of showing me what I no longer have!" Spot came down stairs wondering what all of the commotion was about and stood at the bottom of the stairs.

"What are ya yellin about Dollface?" he asked. But I was in no mood to talk. They wouldn't understand even if I sat there an explained it to them. They had to be me to know the logic behind my vengefulness. Also considering the fact that they are men and wouldn't know what it felt like to deal with the restrictions that I women had in society.

"Nothing!" I said as I turned around and walked out the door slamming it behind me.

As I made my way to meet Olivia on the corner by the bakery. I tried as hard as possible to erase the thought of my brother from my mind. But no matter how hard I tried I couldn't escape it. I sighed as I saw my friend standing in her work dress waiting for me. She didn't say anything as we went on our way. Just by the look on my face Olivia knew that I was in a foul mood and wouldn't wish to talk. When we walked into the theater and I saw everyone rushing around frantically I knew it was going to be a very long day.

  
Thank you to:

Bess3- A new reviewer! I am so happy! I haven't had many new reviewers in awhile. I am very happy that you are enjoying my story. Yeah I am really trying to make Hanna as realistic as possible. Well as real as you can make a fictional character. Don't worry things will begin to heat up with spot and Hanna. I hope you liked this chapter and I hope to hear from you again soon.

Padfootismyhero- I'm glad you enjoyed that chapter. I hope you like this chapter as much as you have like the rest of them. You better update your story soon before I have to hunt you down myself and force you to write. Lol just kidding but you really do need to update. I love your story so much.

Coin- Thank you again! I can't say it enough, how much you helping me means. If I didn't have you checking my stuff over the chapters wouldn't be half as good as they are. I am glad you liked that saying in the chapter, it just kinda popped up in my head while I was writing. I literally don't plan out anything that is going to happen in the chapter it just writers itself basically. I hope you liked this chapter also and if you could, check it whenever you can.

NadaZimri- I am so glad you like that chapter. I was surprised that people thought it was that good because I didn't. But that's just me, lol. Yeah…I had to make Hanna have a female friend it would be crazy being surrounded by all guys. So I brought in Olivia for some reassurance. Yeah, Spot was bad in the last chapter but he is trying to make it up to her. I guess we will just have to wait and see what happens. Since I don't have the next chapter written I am just about as clueless as you are.

Splashey- Hey! Yeah I hate final's so much. I still have some left to do, my school likes to split them up. Like have so many classes one week and then the rest the next week. I can't wait till I get out of school but I still have another week left. Anyway, I am surprised at the reaction I got to that chapter, I thought it was one of my worse ones. But I am so happy that you liked it, it makes me feel better. I liked writing this chapter a lot and I hope you liked reading it to, let me know what you think!

Emotions- Yeah I like happy chapters too, sorry that I had to make this one a little more depressing lol. Finally when things started to look up it goes back downhill again. But that's just how things happened. Anyway let me know what you thought of this chapter even though it wasn't as happy. And we both will have to wait and see how things turn out with Spot and Hanna. Because I'm just as clueless as you are.

Lena-Jade- Hey! Welcome back! Lol its ok that you didn't have time to review. I am just glad you enjoyed it. Here is the next chapter, I hope you liked this one too. Let me know what you think whenever you get the chance. Anyway…onto your question about Race and Hanna. You see at first I thought that was how it was going to turn out. That Race would like Hanna but she liked Spot and so on. But then I kinda had this other idea for later on in the story and I decided that it wouldn't work. So I am keeping Race as just like a brother figure and best friend. But there is another guy that will cause some problems. He had a small part in the chapter about Spots party.

Shortstack and Fishface- Wow, I am so happy that you actually decided to read my story. Because I think you write such wonderful stories yourself. Yeah I know that there are a lot of spelling and grammar mistakes. I am very bad at that kind of stuff and don't worry I don't take it personally. I'm glad you think I'm doing a good job with my OC. Because I was trying really hard to make her as real as possible. Also I just had to make Race the brother figure in the story because like you said, he is just a sweetie. I decided to pick that type of persona for Spot because if you didn't hate him at least a little bit then there wouldn't be any fun to the story. Oh and if I do ever need a cameo I will be sure to let you know.

Luv ya lots,

BlackWiltedRose


	13. Confused

Hello everyone! Today is a happy day, because today is my Birthday! Please if you like my story then review. It would make my birthday just to see everyone who likes my story to tell me what they think. You are all so very kind and I hope I continue to do this story justice. LUV YA ALL!

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

Chapter Twelve

As I had predicted it was a long and tiresome day. The crowd was busier than usual. Due to a new twin sister act that Medda had just hired. My feet were aching profoundly and by the end of the night my shoulder was throbbing painfully. Although I was ecstatic that I had acquired almost ten dollars in profit.

I made sure to pay Kloppman when I made it back to the lodging house that night. He congratulated me on my exceedingly profitable occupation. I smiled and thanked him graciously before I made my way up to my room. Most of the newsies were sleeping or sitting around doing nothing. A few of them looked up when I walked into the bunk room but by now they had become accustomed to my late arrivals. Recently I had been offering to stay late and help clean up around the theater for an extra dollar. Any bit of money would be a blessing to me.

I walked into my small room and flopped down onto my metal spring mattress, sighing as I threw the covers over my body. I didn't even bother to get undressed because my eyelids were becoming heavy and my breathing shallow. So I had a few minutes to recall my day before I fell into a welcomed slumber.

The sun was shining brightly in my eyes and for a moment I thought that I was back in my house once more. But when I opened them and saw the same dirty wood ceiling I remembered where I was. I sat up with a groan of protest and fixed the sling on my shoulder as I counted down the day until I would be able to take it off.

I stood up and removed the work dress that I had fallen asleep in. It was Sunday and I had the day off because there were no shows tonight. I didn't really know what I would do with myself. The thought of having no work was strangely welcoming. So I smiled softly and stretched my arms in the air. After I had changed into a blue skirt and white blouse, I fixed my hair and then left. Race was laying out on his bunk with an unlit cigar in his mouth. He was counting a stack of money in his hands that I knew he must have acquired from a lucky night of gambling.

"Hey Race, why are you not out selling paper?" I asked as I took a seat on the bunk next to him. He held out the wad of dollar bills in front of him proudly.

"I made all of the money I need yesterday at da track," Race smirked gleefully. I was reminded of a little boy at Christmas time when he first sees the presents under the tree.

"So, since you aren't doing anything. Do you wan't to spend the day with me? I haven't anything better to do." I asked looking over at him hopefully. Ever since I started working I hadn't really had time to do much with my friends. Especially Racetrack who I was rather fond of.

"Well if ya don't have anything better to do." He said laughing and I shoved him playfully on the arm. "I'd luv ta spend the day wit you Dollface. But I have ta make a quick stop in Brooklyn first. Jack needs me ta give Spot a message."   
I sighed and then nodded my head, "Ok, then I'll go with you."

" I dunno Doll, rememba what happened last time ya went to Brooklyn." Race spoke with a brotherly authority.

"Yes, I remember perfectly. But as you know, Spot and I have worked out most of our differences. We have agreed on mutual terms." I replied and then nodded my head as if to say that it was the end of the discussion.

Even though Spot Conlon was rather annoying, I was in a good mood and could handle anything he threw at me. But I just happened to forget to mention to Race that Spot had asked me to dinner. Because I knew that he would not approve and not want me to go. I hated lying to Race but I knew that he would not understand my feelings, it was something I would have to work out for myself.

So I waited while Racetrack got dressed and then we left. It didn't take as long to make it to Brooklyn as it had the night of the party. Or maybe it was just because I was daydreaming most of the time. Thinking about everything that had happened. No matter how hard I tried I could not come up with a positive solution to the situation with my brother. There was a small part of me saying that I should go and meet him at least. No matter how tormenting it would be to my heart.

Finally we crossed the Brooklyn bridge and made our way into Spots territory. There were a few boys wondering around on the docks, starring at me uncomfortably as we walked to the Lodging House. But most of them were out selling the morning papes. I moved closer to Racetrack as we entered the old fishing shack where the newsies slept. When we walked through the door of the shabby old building it was completely empty inside except for a sandy haired boy sitting in a corner reading a book. Automatically I recognized who he was.

"Hey Booker!" I said as I stalked over and flopped down into the chair beside him. He looked up startled but then smiled when he saw it was me.

"Well I never expected to see your face around here again," John replied as he sat his book down on the table. "So who's ya friend?" I looked up and realized he was talking about Race.

"Oh sorry," I said as I stood up and grabbed his arm, pulling him closer. "This is Racetrack." Both boy's looked at each other for a moment and then shook hands. "And Race, this is Booker. I met him at the party the other night."

"Yeah I seen ya around," Race replied.

"So what brings you to Brooklyn," Booker asked curiously. I knew he was wondering how after that night at the party, I would even step foot across the bridge. But that was only because he didn't know that me and Spot were back on speaking terms.

"I need da talk to Spot. Is he around anywhere?" Race asked Booker. "Jack wanted me to give him a message."

"Yeah he's up in his office talking to Rose." Booker replied casually as he pointed up the stairs to a brown wooden door. "Should be leaving soon though. He said he could afford ta skip the morning papes, but he still needs to sell da afternoon edition." Race nodded and then joined us at the table.

"Why is Rose here?" Racetrack asked. I wondered the same thing considering that Rose was a Manhattan newsie and most of them refused to enter another's territory. The only reason I was here was because I was with Race. Race and Spot were friends so that gave him free rain to go where he wished.

"I don't know, she stops by every once in awhile to talk to Spot. I can't figure out what they would have ta say to each other but after she leaves he's always in a foul mood." Booker replied just as Spots door slammed open and out walked my red headed enemy.

"JUST STAY AWAY FROM HERE!" Spot yelled and I cringed once more at the coldness in his voice. There were so many different sides to Spot and this was the one that I feared the most.

"MY PLEASURE!" Rose screamed back at him with the same amount of anguish and harsh hostility. She stomped down the stairs and walked across the floor. When she saw me she stopped and glared menacingly. "What are you doing here?"

I stood up to my full height which was about two inches taller than herself and glared back. "Personally I don't see how its any of your business." She just huffed and shoved past me. Booker was laughing to the right and I turned to him "What is so funny!"

He stopped laughing and didn't answer. But his eyes were shining and he had a huge grin on his face. Race was also starring at the whole scene rather amusingly then he got back to his priorities. " How ya doin Spot?"

"I wouldn't even ask." Spot said as he tried to regain his composure. I found it to be rather rude but Race didn't take it seriously. I guess it was because he had known Spot for so long, that his angry outbursts were normal.

"I know dis probably aint a good time. But I got's a message from Jack." Race said. Spot's brow's were creased and his eyes blazing as he looked at Racetrack. "It's something that I think ya outta hear."

"Well den, let's hear it." Spot said. "I aint got's all day."

"We need da talk somewhere else. Jack said that it's not something for everyone ta know." Spot sighed and then nodded his head.

He turned around and started walking back up the stairs to his office. Racetrack turned to me. "Stay here with Booker. Don't go wondering about." I nodded my head, feeling much like a little kid.

A few minutes after Race and Spot disappeared through the bedroom door I turned and looked at Booker. But to my surprise he was already starring at me. I could feel my hands start to shake and tiny beads of sweat trickle down my forehead. For in his eyes I saw something that scared me. It wasn't the intense power that lingered in Spots every movement or the crazy joy that I saw every time Race looked at me. What I saw in Booker's eyes was nothing more than pure admiration and it frightened me.

"Let's take a walk," Booker said cheerfully as he stood up and took my hand in his own. I hesitated for a moment but followed.

He led me out of the Lodging House and into the sweet warmth of the day. I could tell by the location of the sun in the sky that it was around noon. We stood there for a few moments without saying a word. I just wrested my arms on the wood railing and began starring down at my reflection in the deep blue water below.

"So, tell me how you ended up as a newsie." I asked suddenly becoming rather curious about the boy standing next to me who was practically a stranger.

"Well, lets see…My father was in the U.S. army. Everyone who knew him used to say he was a great guy, brave. I wouldn't know because my mother was still pregnant with me when she got the news that he was killed overseas. She went into labor no more than two day's after his funeral." He sighed and then looked up at the sky. "My mother she was weak and it was a difficult pregnancy. She didn't make it in the end. The doctors said that there was nothing they could do."

I placed a hand over my mouth, "Oh John, I am so sorry."

He just put up a hand to stop me and continued on with his story. "Since both of my parents were dead my mother's sister Ruth had to take up the responsibility of raising me. She was a wealthy widow who lived rather decently in a large manor in Pennsylvania. But after two years of being alone she met a rich lawyer from New York. That's how I ended up in the city. We moved here on my third birthday." I placed a hand on his shoulder comfortingly. I knew that this must have been hard for him to speak of. "While I was growing up I had nothing but the best of everything. When I turned nine Ruth decided to send me to a high class academy in Philadelphia. There I managed to get myself into a lot of trouble. Always starting fights and never keeping my grades up to satisfactory levels. Finally the Headmaster decided to send me home. My aunt was furious with me. After a long discussion with my new uncle, she came to the conclusion that I was more trouble than I was worth and put me up for adoption. Of course I wasn't going to stay in that horrid place for long. That's how I met Spot and the rest of the newsies."

"Oh yes, Spot…how did I know he was going to pop up somewhere." I replied sarcastically and Booker just laughed.

"He's really not as harsh as he seems. Spot just knows what he wants and expects nothing but the best from everyone around him. He's a good leader and a good friend. But I could tell that you and him don't exactly see eye to eye on certain things." Booker said smirking in my direction.

"Try everything," I said laughing and then looked back down at the water. "I just can't seem to understand him." I sighed and twirled one of my golden curls around my index finger.

"Do you want to understand him?" Booker asked curiously and I was taken aback. I looked over at him and he was starring at me intently waiting for an answer.

"I don't know," I said truthfully. "He drives me insane sometimes…ok most of the time. But then he can be so sweet and kind that it makes it so hard to hate him. He has asked me to give him a chance but I don't know."

"Would you ever give me a chance?" Booker asked and I smiled sweetly as I turned to stare at him.

"I already am," he returned my smiled graciously and then fiddled nervously with his hands.

Even though he looked away I continued to stare at him curiously. I was beating up my mind trying to get it to figure out just what its priorities were. Because I had finally come to the conclusion that there was definitely some attraction that I had with Spot. A deep an internal feeling that warmed my very soul. But with Spot came many complicated and other curious emotions that I wasn't sure I wanted to deal with.

Yet standing here before me was a rather handsome young man who adored me in every way. He was sweet and charming, everything that I had been raised to love. He was intelligent and shared basically everything in common with me, including the losses that I have suffered. But when I starred into his eyes there was nothing in my heart. When I starred into Spot's eyes I felt as if I was drowning in them and unable to pull away.

I suddenly grew angry with myself for becoming so confused. Why when I started sorting out the situation with Spot another boy had to come along and throw everything out of order. I didn't know whether I should ignore Booker's apparent attraction for me and follow my heart. Or whether I should take the easier way out and agree to give Booker a chance. Either way someone was going to get hurt and in the end I knew it would be me.

Thank you to:

Bess3- Hey, I am glad to hear from you again. I love having new reviewers and you are so nice to me. I am so happy you liked the last chapter, I hope you liked this one too even though I think it was a bit rushed. Let me know what you think. Don't worry there will be more to come with Spot also you I will be getting into more about her brother. I just like building up a backround before I start digging into the main story line. To make you feel like you are sort of connected with the characters. Well review soon and let me know what you thought of this chapter.

Padfootismyhero- Hey! I am so happy I started talking to you. Sorry I haven't emailed you in awhile. I have been really busy. I am surprised I ended up getting this chapter posted. Yeah Hanna's brother is extremely stuck up and like my other reviewer said "Pompous". That's how I planned him to be. Sorry if this chapter was a little bad, I just wrote it like in the past hour. I hope you liked it though and review. Also email me when you get the chance.

NadaZimri- Yeah I know her brother is a bit pompous, but that's exactly how I want him to be. You'll start to see more of him later on in the story. You will also start to see many sides to Hanna throughout the story. Because this is the time when she starts becoming confused about herself and disoriented. I am glad you like the chapter and I hope to hear from you soon.

Splashey- I did enjoy writing the part with Spot and Hanna. It was fun! I can't go into detail about the rumors, let's just say they were inappropriate. Because the boys think there is more going on with her and Spot than there really is. Yeah I hope to start getting more into the plot. Anyway I hope you enjoyed this chapter. It isn't as long as I would have liked it to be but I'm happy it turned out ok.

Emotions- Hey! Yeah, sorry for all of the ranting. If I ever get carried away just slap me and tell me to snap out of it. Lol Sometimes I just feel like I am my character (if that sounds strange) and I get worked up over certain situations. So I won't shut up, until I prove my point. But I think I'm ok for now. Yeah I am happy Spot apologized to, but now Hanna is confused. Hmm…I wonder what is going to happen now.

Lena-Jade- Sorry about the spelling mistakes I always get "your" and "you're" mixed up. I am a horrible speller. So I know that there were most likely a lot of mistakes in this chapter considering I wrote it in an hour. But I hope you enjoyed it. I just wanted to make sure I had something to post. Also as you can tell, John West is the boy who will stir things up a bit.

Luv ya lots,

BlackWiltedRose


	14. Drowning

Sorry it took me so long to update. I was out all weekend long. This chapter isn't one of my best's but I still enjoyed it. I couldn't come up with anything to write for it so I decided to use this as the time to bring in one of my evil characters. Well I hope you enjoy it.

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

Chapter thirteen

Me and Booker sat out on the dock for what seemed like hours before some of the newsies started returning from the morning sale. They starred at me strangely and I began to feel rather uncomfortable and wished I was back in the Lodging House with Racetrack and Spot. I just acted calm as we made our way back to the building. But before we reached the end of the dock I heard a snarling voice from behind me.

"Well, what do we have here?"

I turned around quickly and was starring at the chest of a kid about four inches taller than myself. He had dark black hair and hazel eyes that were boring holes into me. I never thought I would meet someone who scared me more than Spot did, but this kid topped the ladder. He had brown pants on and a blue checkered shirt that was two times to small. Feeling extremely frightened I backed up into another boy who was standing behind me.

"Aren't you a pretty little thing," Said the scary boy to his right as he began walking closer to me.

"Leave her alone, Blade!" Booker said sternly to the bigger kid, stepping in front of me. I thought it was very brave of John considering he was no match for the other boys.

"Why? Is she your girlfriend?"

"No," Booker replied but still remained standing between me and the kid.

"Well in that case, move out of the way." Blade said and with great ease shoved Booker off to the side. He grabbed my arms tightly and pulled me closer to him. His hands were digging into the bruises left from the night of the party and his breath smelled like rotten milk. I turned my head away when he began to talk and crinkled my nose in discussed.

"Your that girl Spots always complaining about," he said and a few of the boys nodded there heads. "Ya know, it's a bad idea to be walking around here all alone. Ya might just get hurt."

But I heard footsteps behind me and Blades grip loosened slightly. "She aint alone," It was Racetrack. Yet I was sad to see that Spot wasn't with him.

"So Race, I see this little goil here is one of your friends." He said nastily into my ear as he stood behind me.

"Yeah, so leave her alone!" Race replied and I seen the flash in his eyes that rarely appeared. Only when he was pushed to a certain limit.

"Oh yeah Higgins? Well what are ya gunna do to stop me?" Blade asked as he pulled me over closer to the edge of the dock.

"Just let her go Blade," Race said stepping closer to us. "I'm not gunna fight ya over dis. She ain't done nothing to ya."

"Well alright." Blade said as he let me go. But my blood began to run cold as I felt his hands on my back. " As you wish," Then I screamed as he shoved me forward and I fell off the side of the dock. I watched as the cold water engulfed me. Since my mouth was opened when I screamed I didn't have time to take a breath. But the thing that scared me the most was that I never learned how to swim. I kicked my feet and swung my arms frantically as I starred at the air above me. But no matter how hard I tried I couldn't get there.

My head broke the surface once for a second and I tried to breath in but the corset I was wearing was making it difficult. I could hear Race scream down my name but I couldn't respond. I guess Spot had come out of the lodging house to see what all of the commotion was about and arrived just in time to see Blade knock me into the river.

I began choking on the water that was filling my lungs and my head felt like it was caving in from the pressure. Soon I became extremely tired and couldn't kick anymore. So I just floated there for a few moments before someone jumped in and pulled me to the surface. I was only slightly conscious as he laid me on the dock. Yet I still had enough strength to roll over and I began coughing up river water. I had never been so happy to breath in all of my seventeen years.

When I rolled back over onto my back Racetrack was starring down into my eyes as he kneeled beside me. "Are you alright?" he asked urgently as he helped me sit up.

I couldn't talk just yet so I nodded my head. I glared up at Blade who was standing above me dripping in water. He had obviously been the one forced to jump in and save me. Then I looked over at Spot who was pacing back and forth, clenching his fist's.

Then he stopped and turned to Blade. His voice was dangerously low as he battled to control his anger. " Are you out of your mind?"

"No," was all he said.

"Ya just don't go snatchin up any person that walks around here and do what ya wan't ta them. Doll didn't do nuttin to deserve dat. Ya coulda killed er' or sumthin. Can't ya ever just think?" Spots eyes were ice cold and sent shivers down my spine as he starred daggers at the large boy in front of him. Even though he was far larger in size, Blade backed off slightly. He wouldn't dare stand up to Spot with the rest of the Brooklyn newsies around.

"What do ya care? Ya don't even like her." Blade retorted angrily.

" I care dat you think it's your right to say who is aloud to be here and who isn't. Hanna was here with Racetrack on important business from Manhattan and I don't appreciate you treatin my guest's like trash. So next time ya feel like exerting your frustrations on someone I suggest ya talk to me about it first. Got dat!" Blade clenched his teeth together tightly and kept his mouth shut as he nodded his head in agreement. I knew it must have killed him to keep quiet. But it was in his best interest if he did. "Now go somewhere and I don't wanna see ya around here till dark."

Blade turned his head and starred down at me. I starred back with a hidden rage boiling in my stomach. Then he turned around and walked into the streets of Brooklyn. Spot looked at him as he departed and then turned to me. To my surprise he reached out his hand to help me up. A warm feeling of contentment and gratitude lingered in my very skin as our hands touched and I got to my feet. "Thanks," I mumbled quietly because my lungs still burned from lack of air.

"Sorry about him. Blade isn't the most friendly of characters." Spot said as he shook his head and laughed. His eyes were less cold as he starred at me. The anger was gone and he was back to being plain old Spot.

"It's fine," I choked out. I shivered and wrapped my arms around my chest as the wind began to blow cold air up from the banks of the river.

"I think its best if we get back ta Manhattan. Before Jack sends out some boys ta come lookin for us. He expected us back an hours ago." Racetrack said and he put his hand on my back and led me forward.

Spot nodded his head, "Yeah I guess ya right. Tell Jackyboy we need ta get togetha sometime to discuss certain things. Oh and Dollface, da next time ya stop by I'll make sure dat your treated decently. We all aint as bad as ya think."

I just shrugged my shoulders, "That's if there is a next time."

Some of the boys around us just laughed and shook there heads. "Aw, come on. Ya can't let Blade scare ya off."

"I'm not scared of him! Is that what you think?" I asked as I looked around and a few boys nodded.

"I just don't feel like dealing with a bunch of self-centered arrogant fools who think its funny to throw me in a freezing cold river whenever they feel like it!" I yelled angrily. "Ever since I stepped foot into this god forsaken neighborhood there has been nothing but trouble for me."

"The only thing I'm afraid of is the fact that if it wasn't Blade, it would have been any one of you." All of the boys stopped smiling and starred at me. "Because you think the same exact way as he does. That I'm just some hoity toity rich girl who doesn't know the first thing about living on the streets. Well you know what! YOUR RIGHT! But at least I have the satisfaction to say that I tried. I can be proud to know that I gave you people a chance, that I gave this life a chance. Now can any of you say the same thing?" I looked around and all of the young men just starred at the ground but no one answered.

"Yeah, that's what I thought. So there's your answer Spot. The day I come back, is the day they learn some manners. Which by the looks of it, is never going to happen!" With that I turned around and stormed out of Brooklyn. Leaving the newsies disoriented and confused, but thinking about what I had said.

We made it back to the lodging house around a half an hour later. Race tried to talk to me the entire way but I ignored him. "I don't want to talk about it," was all I would say.

But when we were a block from my temporary home, Racetrack grabbed my left wrist to stop me. "Would ya just hold on a second?"   
I turned and starred at him questioningly. "Why can't you just leave it alone?" I said. Race just shook his head and gave me the same stern look that I always receive from Jack.

"Because ya gotta know that ya can't keep doing that. Its not good ta upset Spot all da time. Especially now when he aint in da best of moods." Race replied as he let my wrist go.

"Do you think I care what Spot thinks, what any of them think!" Race just laughed.

" I know ya don't care what he thinks. But you have to work on keeping ya mouth shut every once in awhile." I frowned and lowered my head to the ground. When I looked back up at him my green eyes were brimming with tears.

"I can't keep living like this Race. I can't keep pretending like everything is fine when its not. I tried, I really did but no matter how much I keep my mouth shut trouble seems to find me anyway. Because its not me, its everyone else's close-minded opinions of what my life is like that brought me to this point. I can do what you want. Keep my mouth shut and never speak again but ya know what? I can't change the world Race." When I said this a single tear slid down my cheek but I wiped it away quickly. Yet that was all that came because I no longer had any tears to cry or received any satisfaction from it. I turned around and walked into the building that no longer looked comfortable to me. These were the moments when I missed my parents the most.

I walked up the wooden stairs and into the bunk room with Race not far behind. All of the boys starred at my soaking wet appearance and some of them laughed but most of them just starred. I think it was the far away daze in my eyes that disturbed them the most. I wasn't angry or upset, I was just lost. All of the happiness in my eyes seemed to have disappeared and was replaced with hopelessness. I walked past them and into my room. Shutting the door quietly behind me. I took off my wet clothes and changed into something more comfortable. Then I sat down on the edge of my bed and starred out my window. For hours I sat there until finally I became to tired and laid down to sleep.

Thank you to:

Padfootismyhero- Hey! I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. I know this one wasn't that good but I had to write something for it. So it was kinda just like a filler chapter. But I did bring in an important character. I can't exactly tell you who Hanna is going to end up with. Then there wouldn't be any fun in reading it if you already know how it's going to end. I hope to hear from you soon. Thanks for being a constant reviewer.

NadaZimri- Hey, that's so cool that your birthday is so close to mine. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Lol yeah if only all of us had two guys who adored us. Wouldn't the world be so perfect. Well considering that would only happen in my dreams I think I will stick to just writing about it in a story. Well I hope to hear from you soon.

Splashey- Hey, its ok that you didn't review till later, really. I don't expect everyone to review every single chapter. Although that would make me extremely happy. Well I'm glad you liked this chapter. Yeah I like Bookers character also. He's like the complete opposite of Spot. That's why I put him in there. Like Spots wild and sort of dangerous. Booker is calm and reserved. Which one she will choose in the end, I do not know. Ok well I do, but I'm not gunna tell you. You will just have to read and see.

Lena-Jade- I'm glad you liked the chapter and I hope you enjoy this one also.

Luv ya lots,

BlackWiltedRose


	15. A Surprise

Hey everyone, I do apologize for the last chapter. I know it wasn't very good. I was having a writer's block. Well I hope that you enjoy this chapter, because I enjoyed writing it. I also apologize for all of the spelling and grammar mistakes you will find in this chapter. My spell check doesn't work very well and I am horrible at correcting stuff myself. Please review and let me know what you think. I feel like I am losing my reviewers.

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

Chapter Fourteen

I decided to wake up early the next day so I could leave before the others awoke. I yawned and got to my feet. The springs in the mattress groaned under my weight and I shivered as me bare feet touched the cold wooden floor. But to my surprise, when I went to walk to the bedroom door I tripped over something on the floor and toppled to the ground. Whatever I had stepped on made a loud groaning noise and rolled over. I screamed loudly and backed up into the door when I realized it was Spot

"What are you doing in my room!" I yelled loudly. But he covered up my mouth so the sound was muted.

"Keep it down, are ya tryin ta wake up da rest of da house," He said quietly.

After he removed his hand from my mouth I got to my feet and straightened out my nightdress. "If I have to I will."

Spot mocked my actions and got to his feet as well. But no matter how hard I tried I couldn't seem to understand what he was doing in my room at 5:00 in the morning. He should be in Brooklyn getting ready to go sell papers.

For a few moments he just stared at me and I began to feel uncomfortable standing there in nothing but my nightgown. I wrapped my arms firmly across my chest and turned around to find something more appropriate to put on overtop. But only to further my annoyance Spot seemed rather at ease considering the circumstances.

"Sorry if I scared ya Dollface. I snuck in through your window last night. I wanted ta talk to ya before ya left for work and I know ya like ta sneak out before everyone else is awake." He walked over and stretched out casually on my bed.

I just stood there and stared at him in strange fascination. I just couldn't understand why Spot was still so persistent on pestering me. Why hadn't he just given up by now. I must have shown him a million times that I wasn't interested in anything he wanted to give me. But then again, I began to wonder whether or not he could tell that my hostile actions towards him were not as sincere as they should have been.

"I'm not in the mood to talk to you." I replied sternly as I walked over to the dresser and slipped on a robe. "Besides I have to get ready for work like you said."

Feeling like this was enough of our little conversation I walked over to the bedroom door. But before I could open it Spot got up off the bed, walked over quickly and put his hand up to hold it closed. "I'm not leaving until this is settled." He said looking into my eyes as I glared at him.

"Oh, so now your holding me against my will." Spot just smirked. I sighed and gave up pulling the door open. "Come now, this really isn't the proper time to discuss something like this."

"Dis is the perfect time." Spot said lowering his voice as we heard footsteps on the other side of the door.

"Please just…" My voice was shaking and I sounded rather frightened. But he put up a hand to stop me from continuing.

"We can't keep doin this." Spot said as he leaned his weight upon the door so I couldn't pull it open. Once more giving up, I let go of my grip on the handle.

"Doing what?" I asked innocently, pretending as if I knew nothing of what he was about to say. I kept my voice steady as I prepared myself for his response.

"Pretending like there's nothing going on between us."

As I looked up into his icy blue eyes my skin became cold and my hands started to shake. I looked away and stared intently upon the ground. "I…I don't know what your talking about." He stood up straight and as an automatic reflex I tried to open the door but he pushed it closed once more.

" So your not even in the slightest bit attracted to me?" Spot asked bluntly. I hated how he loved playing with my emotions. Taking advantage of my uneasiness, he took a step closer as to test my patience. I laughed to myself. There I was once again backed up into a corner by the same boy that has been bothering me for two weeks now. But this time I didn't seem so afraid.

I stood up straight and met his gaze. "Now really I don't think that this is entirely approp…." But my voice trailed off as his face was inches from my own. When our lips met I was sure that sparks must have ignited in my soul. My heart was pounding in my chest and I was thinking of nothing more than how good he smelled. I didn't push away because somehow it felt perfect as I found myself sinking into his arms.

It was unlike anything I could have possible imagined. I found it amazing that right before my eyes I saw Spots rough exterior disappear and he became surprisingly gentle. The kiss was soft and intimate. But in my opinion it was nothing more than simply perfect. I knew now that there was no more covering it up or hiding my secret. I was his since the day I met him.

When we finally broke apart I could do nothing but stand there breathless. Although I was happy to see that I wasn't the only one who was left in a daze. Spot just stood there and stared at me with satisfaction glowing in his eyes. I think I must have opened and closed my mouth more than four times before I finally gave up speaking.

Before I knew it we were in each other's arms once more. We didn't break apart until I heard that familiar nock on the door and it was pushed open, smacking us both in the side of our arms. Spot and I quickly slammed it shut again. If they knew that he was in my room, I could be in a lot of trouble.

"One moment Race, I'm still getting changed." I said shortly and I hoped that he didn't hear the change in my voice.

"Alright, but hurry up or ya gunna be late." I didn't let the door go until I could hear his footsteps going in the opposite direction. I felt horrible lying to Race but he just wouldn't understand. Well not yet at least.

I turned to Spot and found him staring at me. I smirked at him and then walked over to my dresser. "What?" I asked amused.

"Oh nothing," was all he said. I was about to pull out my work dress but Spot stopped me as he wrapped his arms around my waist from behind and pulled me away. "How about dat date I promised ya?"

"How about it?" I asked curiously. I could tell by the look in his eyes that he was planning something mischievous.

"Spend the day wit me," Spot said shortly as he let my waist go.

I turned around and stared at him authoritatively. "I have work today and so do you."

"We can skip it for one day. Just come wit me please." He asked.

"And what exactly am I suppose to tell Medda. She needs me there." I said in response to his question. I wanted desperately to follow the answer my heart was giving me but my brain kept telling me to be reasonable. I have a new life now and with that comes certain responsibilities that I can't just throw away because of one boy.

"Just tell her you're sick or you're hurt. I mean come on Doll you're intelligent, come up with something." Spot said as he gave me a pouting look. I once again found myself falling helplessly into those eyes. How could I tell him no when he was looking so vulnerable.

I sighed and threw my arm in the air. "Oh alright! Just go outside while I get changed." Spot did as he was told and climbed back out of the window and sat down on the fire escape.

I walked back over the my dresser and reluctantly folded back up my work dress. The I pulled out a light blue button up blouse and a long white skirt. I ran my fingers through my curly nest of golden blonde locks and then tied it back with a white ribbon. I walked over to the window and leaned out.

" I have to go out and show the boys that I'm still here. Whatever you do, don't let any of them see you. I could be in a lot of trouble if they knew that you were in my room." I asked, my eyes pleading with him to agree. I knew how stubborn he was and how he didn't like taking orders.

But to my surprise Spot just nodded his head. I smiled at him and went back into my room. I opened my bedroom door and walked out into the bunkroom. Most of the boys were still sleeping and Race looked up at me. Since the boys had finally gotten used to a girl being around they loosened up slightly on some of the rules. So I was now aloud to use the washroom as long as no one was changing.

"Hey Race," I said happily walking over and sitting down on the bunk beside him.

He looked up and smirked at me surprised. "Your rather cheerful dis mornin."

I just nodded my head. "Well I just figured that there's no use in hating the world all the time." Race just looked at me and shrugged his shoulders.

"Whateva ya say Dollface." He replied laughing. Then he shook his head. "Your crazy, ya know that."  
"Of course but you know you wouldn't love me any other way." I replied as I walked into the washroom and cleaned up a bit. When I returned I said goodbye to Racetrack and walked into my room. I went over and looked out the window. Spot was still sitting there and he stared over his shoulder at me impatiently.

"Are ya done yet?"

"Yeah I'm done." I replied. Spot stood up and helped me out the window. I looked behind me to make sure none of the boys could see. Then we quickly climbed down the fire escape and ran until we were a block from the Lodging House. "So where exactly are you taking me on this date?"

"Wherever ya wanna go," Spot said. We walked down the street contemplating on where we should go when I saw Skittery standing on the corner. Spot quickly shoved me into an alley so he wouldn't see us.

"There is one problem." I said my heart pounding in my chest as I prayed that Skittery didn't see us. "No matter where we go, we have to make sure that no one we know is there." I said.

Spot ran a hand through his brown hair as he thought about our complication. Then he turned to me. "Come ta Brooklyn." He said.

"What?" I asked confused.

"There is no one ya know in Brooklyn. So if anyone saw us togetha then dey wouldn't care."

I shook my head no. I thought I had made it perfectly clear that I hated Brooklyn with a passion. But then realization dawned upon me. Spot _was_ Brooklyn and to be with him would mean I would have to be a part of his world. No matter how afraid I was. "I can't Spot. Not after how I acted yesterday."

Spot just looked at me confused and then laughed. "You're afraid ta come back because ya yelled a little bit yesterday? Half of da boys probably don't even rememba what ya were talkin about in da first place. Besides the fact that ya had every reason ta be angry."

Why did he always have to be right? Even though I knew Spot had a point I was still reluctant to give in and once again return to his beloved neighborhood. But he had such a desperate look on his face that I couldn't say no. "Ok, I'll give it one more chance."

Spot looked so happy that I couldn't help but smile brightly at him. I just hoped that I would still be this happy by the end of the day. Yet somehow as I walked at his side I knew that today would be different. I didn't know how but I just knew that as long as I was with Spot then nothing (or nobody) could touch me.

Thank you to:

NadaZimri- Hey, thanks a bunch for being such a constant reviewer. It makes me happy to know that there are some people who really do like my story. I know it has been getting kinda boring lately but I had to bring in some new characters first before I could really get into the story line. But as you can tell, I'm getting there. But now that I have all the characters that I need I can really start having fun writing it. I know that this chapter wasn't very long. But if I continued it, it would be like nine pages.

C.M. Higgins- Thank you so much. I am really glad you enjoy my story. I didn't think that the last chapter was one of my best though. But I was having a sort of writers block. But as you can tell I have gotten over it. I am happy because now I am getting into the good stuff. I agree with you that Hanna shouldn't keep yelling at Spot. But as you can tell in this chapter…she didn't do much yelling. I hope you enjoyed it and please review this chapter and let me know what you thought of it.

Lena-Jade- Yeah I know that the last chapter was bad. I rushed while writing it because I had to get it posted before I left to go somewhere. I also know that there are a bunch of spelling mistakes. I can't apologize enough for how bad I am at that. Especially with what you pointed out. I know there are a lot of spelling mistakes in this chapter also. But hopefully I will be getting some help with that soon. Anyway as you can tell in this chapter, Hanna is giving him a chance. I know she was being hard on Spot before but it was only because she was afraid to fall for him. So she was trying to push him away. I hope you enjoyed this chapter even though its kind of short. I had to stop it there because if I continued on it would be like more than nine pages long.

Raeghann- It's ok that you haven't reviewed. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I went though the same thing a couple of weeks ago. But onto something less depressing. I know the story has been going a little slow lately, it was just because I was having a sort of writers block. But I didn't want to wait until it was gone before I posted again because if I stopped writing then I would have trouble starting again. So I just continued to write until I got out of it. So don't worry I know where I am taking the story. I have to apologize once more for all of the spelling and grammar mistakes that I have. I am really bad at that. I know there are probably a lot of problems in this chapter as well because I kind of rushed through this. I did have someone who was correcting stuff for me. But I haven't heard from her in awhile. So I would love to have your help. Especially since I think you are such a great writer. Well I hope to hear from you soon.

Luv ya lots,

BlackWiltedRose


	16. The First Date

****

Hey everyone: Here is the next chapter. Sorry but I don't have the comments to my reviewers at the end of the chapter this time. Because I had to post this fast because I wont be here for the next few days. I apologize for all of the spelling mistakes. I hope you enjoy it.

Chapter Fifteen

The weather was nice as we walked down the streets of Manhattan. The sun began to rise higher in the sky and the temperature grew slightly warmer. Spot and I walked most of the way in silence. But it wasn't an uncomfortable silence just time for us to think. Besides the fact that we wanted to remain aware of the people around us so that we didn't get caught.

I did have a hint of guilt wallowing in the pit of my stomach but the sheer urge to be spontaneous was overpowering it. Never in my life had I ever had the free will to go where I pleased or to be courageous and have fun. Besides the fact that I had been working to the bone since the moment I started my job at the theater and I deserved a little break.

I glanced over at Spot and smiled. It was funny to me how one person could change me in so many different ways. Before that day I had never truly had a boyfriend nor was I ever kissed like I had been back at the Lodging House. Of course I had young men who liked me before but they had never looked at me the way that Spot did. They would stare at me like I was a mere play object but they would handle me like a delicate porcelain doll. Spot had kissed me with such a passion that it made my knees weak and my heart skip a beat.

But I sighed to myself because somehow in the back of my mind I still felt that Spot was dangerous to me. He had the power to make me forget all of my morals and sneak around behind my friends back just by asking. The fact that I was so willing to follow him made me afraid. I knew Spot cared for me but I also knew that he must have cared for all of the other girls he went out with before. Was I being foolish? Was I walking into a situation where nothing awaited me at the end but heartache? Or had he really changed and finally become someone who was actually capable of a true commitment? I frowned as so many questions that I didn't know the answers to ran throughout my mind.

Suddenly I felt someone staring at me and I looked up into those familiar blue eyes. It was strange how they could seem so icy cold but yet they ignited a warmth that burned in my very skin. Spot reached out and took my hand in his own. "Are you alright? Ya look upset about sumthin." I smiled once more at his rough Brooklyn accent.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I was just thinking that's all."

After I finished talking I looked quickly back down at he ground. Because when I stared at Spot I found that my barriers slowly began to crumble and I wanted nothing more than to hold him, to tell him all of my problems and concerns. But somehow I knew that they were questions only time would have the answers to. "What were ya thinkin about?" He asked curiously.

"Life," was all I replied and he nodded. To me Spot didn't look much like the type of boy who sat around thinking about his problems. He was the type to go out and fix them. But who knows… Spot seemed to surprise me more every minute that passed by. Suddenly my mind came out of its daze when we were almost to the bridge. I grew excited when we passed a plump old mad with gray hair, selling red roses.

" I love roses," I exclaimed as I bent down and smelled them. Spot just looked at me amused. I looked up at him and raised an eyebrow curiously. "What?"

"You are unlike any goil that I've ever met, do ya know dat?" Spot said as he grabbed my arm suddenly and pulled me quickly away from the roses. I wondered at his sudden strange behavior but I didn't say anything.

"Is that a bad thing?" I asked and he just laughed.

"I'm not exactly sure yet." He replied looking rather amused at the pouting expression on my face before he leaned over he kissed me.

My lips quirked into a grin before I pulled away. "I know I'm a good kisser Spot but we really have to get into Brooklyn soon." He just laughed and then held his hand up in front of him. In his fist he held a single red rose. "Oh, its beautiful!" I exclaimed. "But you stole it." My smile faded into a disapproving glare.

"Oh, well if you don't want it then," Spot made a move to toss it over the bridge but I snatched it out of his hands.

"I never said I didn't want it." I broke off the stem and put it behind my ear so that I wouldn't have to hold in the entire day.

When we finally made it across the bridge I found myself walking a little closer to Spot than I had been earlier. Even though it was still New York City, I considered Brooklyn a completely different world. In Manhattan everything is constantly moving because it's the center of all the main corporations and businesses. It was always busy and thriving with people. So everyone around you had there own thing to do and they just went about there daily routine just trying to make a living.

Brooklyn on the other hand was different. It was a dreary neighborhood where everyone you walked by was suspicious. The type of place where you should never talk to strangers. The boys who grew up on the streets of Brooklyn were bigger and broader than most. That's because mainly all of the jobs you find around there are based on intense physical labor. Either working down as the docks or in some run down factory. The Brooklyn boys were mean and trusted nobody but themselves. So if they hadn't seen you around before you were trespassing. I had learned that the hard way.

Seeing that I was nervous Spot squeezed my hand tighter and then put his arm around my shoulder. "Let's go back to da Lodging House first so we can eat some breakfast. I don't know about you but I'm starvin." I laughed and nodded my head.

It took us a few minutes to get to the Lodging House and when we walked inside there were a surprising amount of boys standing around getting ready to leave. They stared at me questioningly before they saw that I was with Spot. I heard a few whispers and I knew what some of them must have been thinking. But I tried to put that out of my mind as Spot took my hand and pulled me over to an empty table.

He left me sitting there for a few moments before he returned with two rolls for us to eat. I was amazed at how much my eating habits had changed since I started living with the newsies. The strange thing was, the smaller portions of food were not the problem. Because when your rich they teach you not to eat allot because you need to keep a nice figure and you want to look proper not like a pig. But I was having a problem going from having expensive French cuisines and fine wine, to eating bread and water every day. But at least I learned not to take small things for granted because there are some people who don't have anything at all.

Soon most of the Brooklyn newsies had left for the local distribution center and all that was left was Spot and myself. "Can I ask you something?" I said turning to Spot who had just finished eating.

"Sure Dollface," He replied nonchalantly as he stretched out in his chair.

"Can we get some ice-cream?" I asked feeling a little foolish. Spot just looked at me and smiled. "I mean I have money and everything. It's just that I never had ice-cream before."

"You never had ice-cream?" He asked in shock and I nodded my head, my cheeks turning red in embarrassment.

"My mother never aloud me to have sweets." I replied softly. He just shook his head.

"Were ya ever just free ta do what ya wanted?" Spot asked as he stood up and took my hand in his own.

"Of course!" I said but I didn't sound so convincing. "After I finished my piano lessons everyday at noon, I would have an hour to myself." I was taken aback when Spot just laughed out loud. "What is so funny?"

"Ya call dat free?" He replied still catching his breath from his sudden outburst.

"Yes," I said, my voice tinted with aggravation. I was becoming so angry that I huffed and turned around to walk out the door.

The dock was empty except for a stray dog sniffing at a stack of boxes. "And where exactly do ya think your goin, Doll?" He replied as he followed me with a smirk on his face.

"Away from here," I said and stepped off the dock. But suddenly I heard a loud noise from beside me and I screamed. The dog had knocked over a bunch of crates. This made Spot laugh even harder. I turned around and glared at him. "Your infuriating do you know that?"

"I am not!" He said affronted. "Ya just can't handle da truth."  
"Of course I can!" I yelled throwing my hand in the air. I still had the misfortune of my arm being wrapped up in the sling. But the doctor said that I would have it taken off in a day or two. "You…you just don't know anything about me!"

"And who's fault is dat?" Spot said.

I yelled in aggravation and then turned my back to him. "This obviously isn't going to work. Thank you very much for the food, it was nice while it lasted. Goodbye!" With that I stormed out onto the street and headed for the Brooklyn Bridge. But to my dismay Spot was right behind me.

I walked a few blocks with him following me in silence until we finally reached the bridge. "Are ya done walking yet because I'm getting kinda tired of chasin ya." Spot said exasperatedly as he stalked behind me. I was just as tired as he was but refused to admit it. But I stopped anyway and turned around to glare at him.

"Would you please stop following me." I said. He was smirking until he saw the look on my face.

"Your not really angry at me are ya?" Spot asked sincerely. I was so upset that I just turned around and continued walking. "Wait!" He yelled as he hurried up and got in front of me, blocking my way.

"Move," I said as I quickly walked around him. I was furious and the worst part was that I didn't even know why. I mean what right did Spot have to go barging into my life, trying to tell me who I was. He didn't know anything about me. But I think the part that made me most upset was the simple fact that he was right about everything.

"Ya can't leave," Spot yelled after me as he ran up to my side and grabbed my good arm. "Would ya just stop for a minute." I could hear the desperation in his voice and finally gave into his pleads, stopping at the end of the bridge. " Why do you have to do that?" I said my voice lower and less hostile.

"Do what?" he asked confused.

Spot let go of my arm and hooked his thumbs behind his suspenders as he leaned his back up against the railing. "Why do you always have to be right?" I said as I sighed and stood beside him. Hesitantly looking down at the river below and trying with all my might not to faint from my growing fear of heights.

"I'm not always right. It's just easy ta guess." Spot replied shrugging his shoulders. "I wasn't tryin ta upset ya or anything."

I nodded my head. "I know," and he smiled. Even though I still felt a little defensive I smiled in return.

"Now let's go. We already lost a few hours out of our day." He reached over and took my arm in his own and pulled me, once again, across the bridge.

When we were walking down a deserted road somewhere in the heart of Brooklyn I stopped and looked at Spot. " How did you become a newsie?" I asked. I knew it was a personal question but he didn't seem to mind.

" I neva had parents like you did. I lived in a orphanage till I was about five years old. Den one day I ran inta a kid named Ben. He was da leada of Brooklyn at da time. But he took me to da Lodging House and I've been der' ever since." Spot said as we continued walking down the street.

I felt a hint of guilt and pity rise in my stomach but I let it pass. I knew how much I hated the pity of my friends and so I would not be the one to deal it out to others. But I did feel guilty for the fact that I had been complaining for a few weeks about my horrible life when some boys like Spot, had never known anything else. They had spent every waking hour, living the horrible nightmare that I had only known for a few days.

The conversation became lighthearted after that and we began to discuss different places around New York that we would like to visit someday. We walked by a large bookstore and Spot let me go inside, even though I knew that I didn't have enough money to buy anything. I could tell that he felt out of place and so we left, ending up in a small park by an office building at the end of the street.

We sat on a bench, underneath the shade of a large oak tree and just watched the people walking by. Occasionally making up story's about the strange characters that we happened to come across. Suddenly we realized that we had been sitting there for a couple hours when the church bells rang 4:00. Spot reached out his hand and pulled me to my feet.

"Come on we have one more place to stop." I took his hand and followed him as he lead me out of the park. We were walking for an hour before Spot finally stopped.

"Where are we?" I asked confused, looking around.

"Well ya said ya wanted ice cream," Spot replied as he pulled me into a store. I laughed when I realized it was an ice cream parlor.

I watched as Spot walked up to the older man working behind the counter. "Spot Conlon! I was wondering when I would be seeing you around here again." The man said and then he laid eyes on me. "And who is this lovely lady?"

"Dis is Hanna Grimmuald. Hanna, dis is Mr. Trickle, he owns da joint." I saw a flicker in the mans eyes as he heard my name but then his expression warmed up. He smiled at me and I kindly shook his hand.

"It is a pleasure to me you," I replied.

Spot ordered us two servings of vanilla ice cream. He said that since I had never had it before I should start off with the most bland flavor, in case I didn't like it. But when I took a spoon full and put it in my mouth. I didn't understand how anyone could hate ice cream. It was one of the most delicious things that I had ever tasted.

We decided to take the ice cream with us as we started heading back to the Brooklyn Lodging House. When we finally made it, the sun had already begun to go down over the horizon. Spot and I sat on the edge of the docks with our feet hanging off the edge. A lot of the boys had returned but they didn't say a word to us. I knew that if I was alone they would have had many things to say to me. But since I was in the company of Spot, everything was fine.

Most of the boys just looked over at us and then went back into the building, tired from a hard days work. When the sun had set completely, I took to throwing tiny stones into the water. Still thinking about how strange everything had turned out. Just the other day I had despised Spot Conlon and everything that went with him. Now I was wrapped up in his arms. I looked up at him and sighed. "I'm sorry," I said sincerely.

Spot looked down at me confused. "Sorry for what?" He asked.

"For fighting with you all the time." I replied solemnly. Even though I knew that a lot of the time he had provoked me into arguing. I had started just as much of the arguments in return.

Spot just laughed. "That's what we do. We fight about everything." He said. "But I wouldn't have it any other way."

I smiled and leaned my head against his chest. "Me either," I replied softly.

We sat there like that for a long time until I finally drifted off to sleep. But I wouldn't realize until the morning just how big of a mistake that had been.


	17. The Fight

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Hey everyone, here is chapter sixteen. Wow this is the farthest I have ever gotten on a story and I don't have any signs of stopping anytime soon. I have the ending already planned out but don't worry, there are still quite a bit more chapters left. So keep reviewing and encouraging me to write. I luv ya all.

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

Chapter Sixteen

I woke up the next morning with the sun shining brightly on my face. I rubbed my eyes and opened them slightly, trying to get used to the light. When I could see once more, I looked over at Spot who was still sleeping soundly, propped up against a post. I stared at him longingly and smiled at the way his hair fell into his face. He looked so peaceful when he slept, that I didn't have the heart to wake him up.

But then I remembered something and panic hit me quick. I hadn't told any of the boys in Manhattan where I was going yesterday. They were probably so worried that something had happened to me. I sat up with a jolt and shook Spot awake. He yawned and looked at me. But when he saw the frightened expression on my face, he sat up straight.

"What's wrong Dollface?" He asked, his voice still groggy from sleep.

"Look around you Spot! It's morning," I practically yelled. But not in anger, more out of panic.

"So," Spot said as he shrugged his shoulders. He couldn't seem to understand what the big fuss was all about.

"If you don't remember, I snuck out yesterday! Which means that nobody knows where I am. When I didn't come back to the lodging house they probably thought something happened to me. Knowing them, they were probably out looking for me all night!" I yelled agitatedly. Then I got to my feet as I started pacing back and forth on the dock. Spot just stared at me with that notorious grin on his face. "They are going to kill me!" I said.

"Calm down Doll, a lot of Newsies don't come back some nights. They find otha places ta stay." Spot replied, trying to calm me down. But it didn't work.

"I'm not a Newsie, Spot. It's different with me. I'm a girl and they know that I have no where else to go. If anything, they would have checked with Medda to see if I was still at work." I replied and then groaned as I sat down next to Spot. "Which means, that they also know that I didn't go to work yesterday morning." I put my head in my hands and sighed. "What am I going to do Spot?"

When I looked up at him he looked as if he was genuinely concerned. He placed his arm comfortingly around my shoulders and squeezed gently. "I'll come with ya. So that ya won't have ta deal wit them alone." I smiled at him but then shook my head.

"I would really like that but you can't. That would get me into even more trouble. I already lied to them but for everyone to find out that I ran off with you, would be a little to much for them to handle." I said.

Spot furrowed his brows and then looked at me sternly. "Ya can't keep lying ta them forever." he said and I heard the resentment in his voice. I knew by the look in his eyes that he was upset.

"I will tell them," I said sincerely. But Spot just sighed and got to his feet.

I watched his back as he took a few steps forward. My heart clenched as I thought he was leaving but then he turned around quickly. "No Doll, ya won't." He said.

I shook my head furiously as my eyes brimmed with tears. "I will tell them, I promise. Its just that I…we can't tell them today." I said sadly looking down at my hands.When I looked back up, Spots eyes were so cold that they sent shivers down my spine. But even through his intensely blue gaze I could see the hurt in his eyes and it ripped at my heart. He walked forward and sat down at my side, with his feet hanging off the side of the dock. "I don't know why I'm so upset. I guess it's just because I'm not used ta havin someone be ashamed ta be seen wit me."

When Spot said this I broke down into tears. "NO! That's not it." I said in-between sobs.

Spot just looked at me angrily. "That's exactly what it is!" He yelled and I cringed.

"No, you don't understand. I…I wasn't suppose to like you this much. I'm not ashamed of you Spot! I'm ashamed of myself!" I cried but Spot didn't seem to understand.

"OH, so now your ashamed because ya like me! That makes it a whole lot betta." He yelled as he threw his hands in the air in aggravation. But I just cried harder.

"It's not like that!" I yelled and then whispered "I failed them."

Spot looked confused and rather unnerved by the whole change of topic. "You failed who?" He asked.

"My parents," I said and sobbed into my hands. "All they… all they wanted for me was the best. That's why they sent me to all of those stupid schools. It was to train me to become the perfect wife so that I would eventually marry into a…" But I couldn't continued because I was crying so hard.

"So you would marry into a rich family." Spot said spitefully. I nodded my head and tried to stop the tears but they just kept coming."

"None of this was suppose to happen. It wasn't what they wanted…" I said crying. But to my surprise Spot put his arm around my shoulders and I leaned my head against his shoulder.

The he tilted my chin so that I was staring into his bright blue eyes. "But what do you want?" he asked.

I paused for a moment and thought about his question. "I…I want my parents back and I want everything to be ok again." Spot squeezed my shoulder gently. "I want to be back in my house, sleeping in my own bed. I just want my old life back." I cried.

"So ya want ta go back ta how everything used ta be?" Spot said as his brow furrowed. He looked concerned about something and I knew what he was thinking.

I scooted closer to him and looked once more into his eyes. "But there seems to be a problem with what I want." I said sadly.

"Why?" Spot asked.

"Because I also want you." I said and before he could answer I kissed him furiously. Spot was shocked at first but then quickly got over it.

We sat there on the dock kissing, until we finally broke apart for air. Spot sat there smirking at me. "What was that all about?" He asked.

I just laughed and said. "I don't know. I guess I just got caught up in the moment." I smiled at him and then leaned my head on his shoulder again. "I don't want to fight anymore." I whispered and I truly meant it.

I could feel the movement of his chest when he laughed. "Alright Doll," was all he said.

We said there for a few more minutes before I got up and wiped my face. "I think we better be heading for Manhattan." Spot agreed and got to his feet as well. He put his arm around my waist and we headed for the bridge.

I remember thinking how wonderful it felt just to be in his arms. When I was with him I felt safe. I never thought that I would ever like someone like Spot, but there I was falling helplessly in love and from what I could tell there was no end in site.

It didn't take us very long to make it to Manhattan. To my luck we didn't run into anybody that we knew. I was ready to handle what was coming. But as we walked up to the door of the Lodging House, my body froze. I couldn't do it.

I wasn't just the fear of being hollered at. It was the guilt that was building up inside me. I had lied to my friends. They took me in and I let them down. They had always been on my side to back me up but its different being on the receiving side of there anger.

Spot put his hand on my back and pushed me in the door. I turned around and he kissed me on the cheek. "Good luck, Doll. I will be waiting for you on your fire escape to see how it goes." He said and I smiled, happy that he was looking out for me.

I turned around and walked slowly up the stairs that led to the bunk room. I took a deep breath and then opened the door. The moment that I walked in, I was met by a furious looking Racetrack. "Where were you!" He yelled. I could tell he was trying to keep calm but his anger was overpowering him.

I started to panic because I had been so concerned about what was going to happen, that I didn't even think to come up with a convincing story. Although I knew that I didn't want to lie to him anymore and that was exactly what that would be. So I decided to be as honest as possible. I sighed and looked down at the ground. "I can't tell you." I whispered.

This seemed to make Race even more furious and he couldn't hold back his anger anymore. "What do ya mean, ya can't tell me!" I continued to star at the floor.

"You wouldn't understand," I replied feeling helpless to stop the explosion that was just beginning.

" We spent the entire night lookin for ya and the only answer you could give me is 'ya wouldn't understand,'!" Race yelled but I shrugged and tried to walk to my bedroom door. But I didn't get very far because he grabbed my arm and pulled me around.

I yanked my arm free from his grasp and step backwards. "Don't touch me!" I yelled. He looked sorry for a second before he became angry once more. He went to speak but I cut him off. " Look, I am extremely grateful that you guys went to look for me, I really am." I said to all of the boys in the room and then I turned back to Racetrack. " But you have to understand that I have my own life. I'm not a little girl, I can take care of myself." I yelled.

But he just smirked. "Yeah, ya say ya can take care of yourself. But I haven't seen any proof of dat," Racetrack said. I stared in shock at how mean he was being to me. Usually he was the first one that would back me up.

I looked up and glared at him. "Oh yeah and you say you're my friend. But I haven't seen any proof of that either!" I yelled and he looked unnerved. "All I've seen is you pulling me around like I'm some little baby. I'm old enough to make my own decisions."

Mush walked up and put a hand on my shoulder. "Calm down Doll, we are your friends." But I was to angry to care.

I had come in here excepting the fact that they would be angry. But Race didn't have any right to insult me like he did. "HA! Yeah some friends you are. That when I walk in the door the first thing you say to me is, 'where were you?'. Not 'how are you or are you alright!" Mush took his hand off my shoulder, probably afraid that I would lash out at him. Not that he really had anything to be afraid of, it wasn't like I could actually hurt him.

But Race acted as if he didn't even hear what I had said. "Well then if its so bad here, why don't ya just leave!" He yelled. But Jack who was watching the whole thing, stood up.

"Come on now Race…" But I cut him off.

"No Jack, its alright. Maybe I will leave." I said and turned around to walk in my room.

"You don't have anywhere else ta go, Dollface." Race said. I could tell by the look in his eyes that he didn't believe that I would leave.

But I was so angry at the moment that I didn't even care what they thought. "Yes I do." I yelled at him.

"Where?" Race stated doubtingly.

"Brooklyn!" I screamed and many of the boys looked shocked.

"Ha! You won't go to Brooklyn. You hate it there." Race said.

I glared at my former friend and lowered my voice slightly. "Oh yeah? Well just so you know…_Brooklyn_ is waiting for me right outside my bedroom window." I said and slammed the door hard in his face. I locked it behind me so Race couldn't open it again.

Tears streaked down my cheeks as I threw most of what I owned into a bag and then opened my window. Spot looked up at me concerned as I fell down into his arms crying. He didn't ask me any questions, he just rubbed my back comfortingly. Then I looked up at him and said sorrowfully "Lets go back to Brooklyn."

Thank you from chapters 15 & 16:

C.M. Higgins- Hey! Well here is another chapter. Are you doing any better with that writers block? I hope so. Sorry that I haven't read and of your other stories. I have been so busy lately that I barely even have time to write. I am so happy that you liked the last two chapters. But I have like the main part of the rest of the story planed out. I mean there is still a lot more to come. I just know where I am taking the story. I already have the last chapter written though. I always like to know how I am going to end it, so that I can work my way up to that point. Well I hope to hear from you soon and keep up the great work with your own stories.

NadaZimri- Hey, welcome back. Lol It's really alright that you didn't have time to review. I completely understand. I am just happy that you were still sticking with my story. I am glad you like chapter fifteen. I really enjoyed writing it. I love ice cream! It's my favorite snack. I hope you liked this chapter also and let me know what you think.

Splashey- HEY! Sorry for the cliffhanger. I didn't mean to leave you hanging there. Nope the ice cream man doesn't have anything against Hanna. He just felt bad for her because he knew that her parents just recently died. I do feel bad for people who can't eat dairy products, that would suck. Well keep reviewing, I always look forward to what you have to say.

Lena-Jade- Yes, once more I am so sorry for all of the mistakes. Once I finish with the story I am going to go over it and correct all of them more closely.

Estrellalily- Hey, I am happy that you like my story so far. I apologies for writing that Spot has black hair, that was a mistake and I have corrected it. I was writing my other Harry Potter story and both of the characters have black hair. So I got mixed up.

NaughteeLady- Well I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I know that it wasn't the happiest of chapters but it helps me move on to the next ones.

MorningDew- I glad to hear from you again. Yeah I know that I have a lot of problems in grammar, spelling and the past and present stuff. I am horrible at that stuff. I normally run a spell check, but it doesn't catch everything. I am actually not even near finished with my story. But I know what the ending is going to be and everything that is going to happen. So I apologies for the mistakes and I hope to hear from you soon.

Clover- I am so happy that I have a new reader! I really appreciate your compliments, they mean a lot to me. I hope that you keep reading and let me know what you think of this chapter.

Luv ya all,

BlackWiltedRose


	18. Breaking Point

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Here is chapter Seventeen. This is basically a chapter that I had to put in so that it would lead to some future events that are going to occur and give you an insight into Hanna's feelings. Sorry for all of the mistakes. But I hope you like it anyway.

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

Chapter Seventeen

I couldn't stop crying as Spot and I made our way back to Brooklyn. I knew he wanted to find out what had happened back at the Lodging House but I just wasn't ready to talk about it yet. I was still to upset even to speak. I felt like my heart was breaking in my chest as I began breathing heavy. I still wasn't completely healed from when I had pneumonia.

No matter how many times I went over it in my head. I just couldn't believe that Racetrack could be so cruel to me. Out of everyone in my life, he was the one person who I had actually considered a friend. Someone who I thought would help me, not hurt me more.

The words _"Why don't ya just leave," _ran throughout my mind. It was as if they had been coming from someone else's mouth when Racetrack screamed them at me. I had half expected something like that from Jack but not my friend. Even though I knew that Race didn't really expect me to listen, it still didn't hurt me any less.

My hands were shaking as once again the bitterness of defeat washed over me. I felt like everyone in my life had given up on me. How could they have the audacity to say that they were my friends when I make one mistake and they throw me to the wolves. I knew that I had lied to them, but it wasn't like I didn't feel guilty about it and I was going to tell them the truth as soon as possible. But they just didn't give me the chance.

I never wanted to leave Manhattan, but I wasn't about to stay somewhere where I wasn't welcome anymore. I should have been an actress because I had pretended to be so calm and arrogant when I left the Lodging House, but really I was scared to death. I was terrified of Brooklyn and the life that laid before me if I left. Don't get me wrong, I felt safe by Spots side but he wasn't going to be around all the time.

But there I was once again leaving everything behind. I was so upset because I had started to make a new life for myself in Manhattan. I had a place to live, new friends and a great job. Yet the cruel hands of fate had dealt me another card and I lost everything. I looked over at Spot who was walking quietly beside me and I sighed. Well maybe not everything.

It had taken us allot longer to make it to the bridge than normal that morning because I had to keep stopping to take a breath. But by the time we had made it across into Brooklyn I had managed to stop crying. Besides I felt like there wasn't any more tears left and it no longer gave me any satisfaction.

I knew I must have looked horrible when we walked into the Brooklyn Lodging House. But I didn't really care at the moment. I felt like I was in a daze or trapped in some hellish nightmare. My mind was a blank and my vision slightly blurred from the tears. Spot took my hand and led me up a flight of stairs and into his room. I could hear the distant sound of a few stray whistles and comments from the newsies. But when Spot turned around and glared at them, it went silent.

When we walked into the room I looked around curiously. It wasn't much bigger than my room had been back in Manhattan. But it was a lot darker because the location of the window didn't allow much sunlight. There was a large brown deck on the far right wall and there were a bunch of old newspapers stacked on top of it. To the right there was a single brass bed with red covers.

Spot took me over and sat me down on the bed. I was still trying my hardest not to cry. He pulled up a chair and sat down in front of me, taking my hands in his own. "What happened?"

I looked down at our hands that were gripped together and right then and there I thanked god for sending him to me. I didn't know what I would have done without Spot by my side to say stupid things to make me laugh and smirk even when nothing was funny.

Then a picture of Race appeared in my head an I sighed. I owed all of the Manhattan boys so much. They took me in when I had nothing and taught me how to survive. But out of all of them Race was like my brother, my best friend. I never in my right mind would have thought that I would have ever been forced to choose between them. Race was my pillar of strength. But Spot Conlon was my savior. I needed both of them to make me complete.

I looked up into Spot's eyes, then turned around and curled up on his bed. I laid there facing the wall and didn't speak. As Spot left his room and I heard the door shut quietly, silent tears ran down my face. I said two times before that I would never cry again, but sometimes tears are a way to cleanse the soul of pain that you are unable to express physically.

I listened to the sounds coming from downstairs and I heard Spot's voice above the others. He was lecturing them on how to act around me. "Ya treat her like you'd treat ya sista," Spot said sternly. I laughed as I pictured the intense look on his face. But then my smile faded as I heard Blade's voice.

"I don't see why we have ta change just cause Manhattan loves ta drop off all there trash on our doorstep!"

I heard a chair hit the floor and I knew that Spot must have jumped to his feet. "Shut up!" I could almost feel the venom in his voice. "I'm tired of ya actin like ya know everything, when ya don't know nuthin. But I will tell ya this Blade…" Spot's voice was low and dangerous. "If ya touch her in any way or make her upset. I will personally make sure you will never be able ta show ya face in Brooklyn again."

I prayed that there wouldn't be a fight as I heard Blade speak. "Is that a threat?"

"That's exactly what it is…" Spot said. "And if ya think I'm jokin…then go ahead and try me."

"Maybe I will!" Blade said temptingly.

At this I sat up in the bed and walked quickly over to the door. I opened it up slightly and looked out. Blade was standing in Spots face, while the rest of the newsies crowded around them. My heart clenched as I saw Spot take a step forward.

It wasn't that I didn't think he could handle this on his own. But Blade was a few inches taller than him and much larger in build. I knew that Spot was the leader of Brooklyn and that he must have been able to keep his title somehow. But I wouldn't have been so worried if his opponent wasn't so much larger than him.

But before anything serious could happen Booker came out and put a hand on Blades shoulder. " I think you should take a walk outside and cool off before you do something stupid." A bunch of the Brooklyn newsies stepped up and agreed.

Looking around, Blade knew that he was surrounded and if he laid a hand on there leader it would be a bad situation. So he shoved Booker out of the way and slammed open the door, walking out into the cool spring air.

That was when I realized just how Spot survived. Not only was he a good fighter but he had a powerful elegance with the boys he looked after. So that if anyone did have the guts to challenge his authority and he wasn't able to take them on himself, he had his friends to back him up. He wasn't a leader out of intimidation, he was the leader of Brooklyn because the newsies wanted him to be.

I looked down at the boy that I had grown so found of over the past few weeks and felt a pain in my chest at the look on his face. I knew that it must have really bothered Spot when one of his boys tried to take control. Which made me even more upset because it was my fault that they were fighting in the first place. If I had never come here then there never would have been an argument.

I shut the door quietly and walked over to his bed. The room had grown even darker as the sun began to set outside. I sat down and put my head in my hands. Suddenly I heard the door open and Spot walked in.

He stopped walking and looked at me startled when he saw that I was awake. "I thought you were sleepin!" He said urgently.

I didn't answer, I just shook my head no. Spot began pacing the room and I watched as he ran his hand through his hair every so often. "I'm sorry," I managed to say, as I looked at him sadly.

Spot stopped pacing and walked over to me. "You heard us fighting didn't ya?" He asked concerned.

I nodded my head as the tears came. "I'm so sorry! I never should have come." I stood up and went to walk to the door but Spot grabbed my good wrist.

"Where do ya think your goin?" He asked with a smirk as he wiped the tears from my cheeks with his thumbs. But when he saw that I was really upset, he sighed and looked at me sincerely. "You have nuthin ta be sorry about Dollface."

I just lowered my head as if ashamed. "I am the reason that you were fighting. Everywhere I go I cause problems. I should just go to the orphanage and stop being such a nuisance to everybody." I cried but Spot grabbed my shoulder and turned my face up to look at him.

"Now look at me! I'm not gunna let ya go ta some orphanage. I don't know what they said ta ya back in Manhattan but your not a nuisance." I smirked but then my face turned sorrowful again. There was a short pause and then I began to tell him everything.

"I was prepared for them to yell at me." I said as I started to tell him the story. He walked me over to the bed and sat down next to me. "But Racetrack…he was so angry. I couldn't take him yelling at me. He was my closest friend, like a brother to me. I don't know why I upset him so much." I said as I leaned my head on Spots shoulder. "I felt like I was being ganged up on. I couldn't take it so I got defensive and started yelling back. I told him that I could take care of myself and that he would just have to trust me. I didn't want to lie to them…. I was so upset that they just wouldn't listen to my side of the story. I was going to leave but then Race…" I started crying again and Spot rubbed my back. "He said that if it was so bad there then why didn't I just leave. So I said that I would and he taunted me. He said that I didn't have anywhere else to go. I could tell by the look in his eyes that he knew I wouldn't leave. So I said that I was coming here and I left."

To my surprise Spot just sat there for a few minutes and let me cry on his shoulder. I think he knew that I wasn't just crying because of what happened that morning but because of everything. A person can only take so much before they finally break. Somehow I knew that this was my breaking point.

Thank you:

C.M. Higgins- Hey, Aww I didn't mean to make you cry! But I guess that was a good thing because that means I did a good job with writing it. I always look forward to reviews that make me so happy. I wrote this chapter kind of quick. It's just kind of like a filler chapter that helps lead to something that is going to happen later on. I luv your stories a lot and I hope that you update soon.

NadaZimri- Yeah I did feel bad for having to make her fight with them. But that is how the story goes. I really didn't mean to make the last chapter as sad as it was. I can't wait to keep writing. things are going to get very interesting.

Splashey- Hey, yeah I was depressed when I had to make them fight. But it had to be a bad enough fight that she would leave. Yeah I decided to send her to Brooklyn so that Spot could be in it more. But a lot of stuff is going to be happening soon. I can't wait to get writing the next chapter.

Coin- Thanks, sorry I haven't emailed you in awhile. I have been so busy and not really able to talk much. I'm glad you liked that saying, it just popped up in my head while I was writing.

Clover- Yeah, I hate to see Race and Hanna fight also. But I had to make a sacrifice for the story line. Don't worry, things get better…and worse. So I hope you keep reading.

Luv ya all,

BlackWiltedRose


	19. Rose Returns

Hey, Here is chapter eighteen. I actually have the rest of the story planned out. But the chapters are not written yet. Don't worry we still have awhile to go. There are thirty chapters all together. Sorry for all of the mistakes in this chapter. But I hope you enjoy it anyway. Please review!

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

Chapter Eighteen

I woke up the next day wrapped in Spot's arms as we laid on top of the covers. I knew that I must have fallen asleep the night before without realizing it. I was laying in a rather uncomfortable position and my injured shoulder was cramping up. But when I went to move I accidentally knocked Spot off the bed. I covered my mouth as he landed with a loud thump on the hard wood floor.

I sat there while trying not to laugh as he dusted himself off and stood up. "What was dat for?"

"I am so sorry!" I exclaimed at the puzzled look on his face. I tried to act serious but I could not keep a straight expression as I looked upon Spots disgruntled figure and I broke out into a fit of laughter.

"Well I'm glad dat ya find dis amusing," He said groggily but eventually my giddiness got to him and he smiled at me. I treasured that moment because it was something that didn't came along quite so often anymore. I marveled at the way his blue eye's turned almost gray when he laughed.

"You have nice eyes," I blurted out before I could stop myself. Then I found my own face burning with embarrassment as I looked at the ground.

This time is was Spots turn to laugh as he walked over and looked out the window. " It's actually about time for us ta get up anyway. I can't skip anotha day of sellin papes." I nodded my head as he turned around to stare at me. For some strange reason I felt a little let down by this announcement but I couldn't expect him to just give up living because of me. "Why are you so happy dis mornin anyway? When last night ya were cryin on my shoulder." He asked curiously.

I just smiled and shook my head. "I don't know. I guess I just love morning's that's all." I replied and Spot shrugged his shoulders.

"Why?"

"Because in the morning everything is ok. Nothing bad has happened yet to ruin, so why shouldn't I be happy . But I don't exactly expect it to last much longer." I said truthfully.

Spot walked over and opened a drawer in a small dresser that he had in the left corner of the room. He pulled out two extra sheets and a small wool blanket. "I know dat tonight was an accident and I suspect that ya won't exactly feel comfortable sleepin in da same bed as me. So I will sleep on da floor from now on." He replied.

But I couldn't possibly live with that so I stopped him before he could continue. "I will not allow you to sleep on the floor. This is your room. You sleep in the bed and I will take the floor." Spot was about to argue with me when there was a knock on the bedroom door.

He walked over and opened it up quickly. Booker was standing there with a rather quizzical look on his face. "I'm not interrupting anything am I?"

We both shook our heads. "No we were just discussing something. It wasn't very important." I replied as I walked over to my clothes bag and began searching for something to wear. Spot watched me for a moment before he turned back to his friend.

" So what do ya wan't," He asked.

Booker just smirked casually. "I was just wonderin whether or no you were gunna sell today. Because ya mention yesterday about need some money."

I found a simple blue dress hidden in the bottom of the bag and pulled it out. I tried to pretend as if I didn't notice the slightly embarrassed look on Spots face. I could tell that he wasn't used to borrowing money off of anybody. I didn't care, of course but to him it had everything to do with pride.

I continued to look through my bag even though I already found my outfit just to hide the smile that had appeared on my face. Spot gave me a sideways glance and then huffed. "Yeah, I'll be sellin papes today." Booker nodded his head and then held out his hand. There were two silver coins in his palm.

Spot took the money quickly and then shoved it into the pocket of his trousers. Even though I was acting like I was busy I still felt a slight tension lingering in the air. That all to familiar feeling of guilt began to grow inside me because I knew that Booker liked me. I told him I would give him a chance but that was before anything with Spot really began. So in order not to stir up any suspicion I completely ignored the fact that he was even there. I knew it was a little bit cruel but there was nothing else I could do.

Soon Booker left and Spot turned to me. "So what's goin on?" He asked and the breath caught in my lungs. There was no way that he could have possibly known.

"Wh...what?" I stammered apprehensively. I decided it was best to act as if I had no idea what he was talking about.

But Spot just raised an eyebrow and tilted his head slightly to the side in a silent judgment of my precarious actions. "Are ya coming wit me to sell papes today? I don't exactly want ya hangin around here all alone, just yet." I let the breath out of my lungs and sighed. I didn't understand why I had become so defensive all of a sudden. I had nothing to worry about.

"Yes, well I guess I will. I mean there really isn't anything better for me to do." Spot just nodded his head in relief. I could tell that he really didn't want to leave me alone just yet.

There were to many dangers for me to get into around here, if I were to stay. A few of the boys began to warm up to me but most of them still had apprehensions. Plus with Blade slithering around I didn't exactly feel safe, even in the company of Spot.

It didn't take me long to get ready after I kicked Spot out of the room. I decided to leave out the whole corset because I wasn't as comfortable with Spot as I was with Race. I mean I knew that Race had a crush on me at first but now it was just a brother/sister type of relationship. With Spot it was a completely different story. So for me to ask him to buckle my corset would be rather odd for the both of us.

The moment I thought about Race, my mood started to change once more. But I quickly put that in the back of my mind as I walked out of Spots room and down to the main floor. A bunch of boys were sitting around doing basically nothing. I was happy to notice that few of them even acknowledged my existence. Soon I located Spot sitting at a table with two boys I had not met yet. I walked over and he stood up to greet me.

After he introduced me to the two twin boys named Brass and Bark, we left for the local distribution center. The day was slightly rainy but by the time we reached our destination the sun had come out.

It was strange to me that after all that has happened between Spot and I, we seemed to be so comfortable in each others presence. There was no awkward tension between us, just welcomed silence. To many people who strolling by we seemed just like good friends, walking down the street side by side. We did nothing special that would signify that we were a couple. I mean we would occasionally hold hands and once in awhile give each other soft smiles, secret smiles as if saying that only we know what was really going on.

I felt slightly awkward when Spot went up to get his newspapers. I could feel the hair on the back of my neck stand up when I got the sinister notion that I was being watched. When I looked up I saw a large group of female newsies staring at me from across the news yard. Obviously there were more girl newsies in Brooklyn than there had been in Manhattan. But these girls were much larger in build and acted more like men than whores. So from what Race had told me, Spot didn't lack his share of female admirers and by the looks they were giving me, I had become there new threat.

Besides the fact that I knew Rose spent a lot of time on this side of the bridge and I couldn't imagine what story's she had been feeding to any willing listener. But I really became fidgety when I started getting rather unnerving glances from some of the boys that hung around. A few of them even decided to approach me.

"Hey there sweetheart," a young man with light dusty blonde hair said to me as he took off his hat and bowed.

I was going to say some smart remark to get him to leave me alone but then I remembered Racetracks advice on keeping my mouth shut. So I smiled softly but cautiously and said "Hi."

"I haven't seen ya around here before," said the boy who decided to take a step closer. "Me names Picket and what, may I ask is your name."

I quickly took as step back and said staunchly. "It's Dollface." The boy just smirked at my nickname as he looked me up and down.

A few of his buddy's were standing by the fence grinning at there friend who was apparently picking up some beautiful girl. "Dat name suits ya real well," said Picket as he stepped forward once more and reached out a hand to brush my cheek. I backed up quickly and ran into large boy who had been standing behind me.

He turned around angrily, "Watch where ya goin goil," he said sternly and then moved over to the side.

I felt like I was being lead into a trap and quickly looked over my shoulder, Spot was up at the window now, paying for his papers. "Look just leave me alone," I said while trying to walk around him.

"Ya obviously don't know how thing go around here Dollface," Said Picket as he backed me up against the wall. I prayed that Spot would come soon. "But I wouldn't mind showin ya," he said as he ran his hand down my shoulder.

I became as stiff as a wooden plank as I felt his rough hand on my skin. But the next thing I knew Picket was being thrown back onto the ground. When I looked over I felt relief wash through me when I saw Spot standing there. His eyes were blazing and I hadn't seen him look so angry. "If ya touch er' again. I'll break your hand. GOT IT!" Spot yelled. The boy on the ground got up and looked at Spot in shock.

" Oh, come on! I was just havin a little fun wit er' dat's all," Said Picket with a cool smirk. But Spot wasn't at all amused with the kids response. I gasped when he turned around and punched the boy in the nose.

"Dat's what will happen ta any guy dat thinks dey can lay a hand on my goil." Spot yelled venomously so that everyone around him heard.

I was standing there staring down at Picket who had a broken nose, when Spot took my hand and lead me out of the crowd. At the time I didn't know whether to be happy or scared at his uncontrollable rage. But after the initial shock wore off I turned to him and I held his hand in my own.

He looked over at me and I smiled. "…my girl…" I said softly.

Spot grinned and put his arm around my shoulders, "Well dats what ya are."

I didn't take Spot long to sell his papers and soon we were heading back to the Lodging House. It was around noon when we arrived. Not many boys were done yet but I did see Booker sitting down playing cards with Brass. Then I noticed Blade who was talking to some kid that I had never seen before. Spot followed my gaze, then he turned to me and said. "Look Doll, I got sum things ta take care of. Would it be alright ta leave ya alone?" he asked.

I nodded my head and then watched as he walked over to join the two boys. But when Blade saw Spot walking over he quickly said goodbye and then left. I couldn't say that I wasn't curious at to what they were discussing as Spot and the visitor went upstairs into his bedroom, which turned into an office during the day. I decided that my best bet was just to go join Booker.

When I walked over he looked up at me curiously. Then I saw as he looked around for Spot. I knew that things were going to be strange between us now, considering the fact that I am dating Spot Conlon. But I still hoped that he would at least want to be friends. Even though at the moment, I looked at friendship as something that was easily breakable. I didn't want to lose him like I had lost so many others.

"Hi," I said as I walked up to the boys. They greeted me in much the same manor. Brass was a nice boy, around three years younger than myself. But he never seemed to take judgment on me at first site which was something that I was grateful for. "May I join you?" I asked.

"Sure," Booker said and I smiled gratefully at him. They were playing poker and dealt me in.

"Do ya know how ta play?" Brass asked. I knew because of my background, he thought that they would have to teach me. But they looked shocked when I nodded my head.

We played for a few hours and I had somehow managed to win more than half of the time. I began to wonder why Spot hadn't come out of his room yet. Especially when on occasion we would hear yelling from upstairs. After I had taken both of the boys money, Brass finally quit. "Where did ya learn ta play like dat?" He asked.

"Oh, Racetrack taught me." Booker noticed the sorrow flash in my eyes at the mention of my _old_ friend. But it was gone as quickly as it had come. Brass just nodded his head and then went to leave.

As I looked down at the pile of money in my hands I realized that there was no way that I could take this off of him. So I grabbed his arm before he could leave. "Take this Brass. I can't keep it." I said. At first the boy looked at me in shock.

"But ya won," He said and tried to hand it back to me but I refused to take it.

"I told you I don't wont it," I said.

"But…" Brass stuttered incoherently.

"TAKE IT!" I yelled forcefully as I pushed him away. "And I'm not going to tell you again." I said laughing at his bewildered expression. He just nodded, but as he turned around I could see the smile on his face. Yet when I turned around myself I was not so happy, because I didn't see Booker but my red headed nemesis. None other than Rose, herself. I cursed at her impeccable timing.

"Oh so now you're tryin ta be charitable." Rose spat out. "Givin money to da needy."

I glared at her. "Well, if that's what I'm doing. Then I should go get the money back and give it to you. Because you're the only needy person I see around here." I retorted and a few of the boys who had gathered around, laughed in response.

I wasn't normally as brave as I was now. I think my smart remarks were due to all of the pent up emotions inside me that she was tempting to let out. But it wouldn't be until her next comment that I snapped.

Rose stepped closer and got in my face. But I just smirked and turned around to walk away. I didn't want to give her the satisfaction of seeing me upset. Yet behind me I heard her voice. "Yeah…just like your mother was before she died."

I could hear what she said in my mind and I watched the boys as there mouth's dropped open in shock. I stopped walking and in an automatic reflex I reached up and pulled off the sling on my arm. Before she knew what I was doing, I whirled around and I felt my knuckles crack as my fist connected with the side of her face.

Rose flew sideways into a table and laid crumpled on the floor. "Don't you ever say anything about my parents!" I said dangerously as I took slow steps towards her.

She sprang up and knocked me down by wrapping her arms around my waist. I felt my back connect with a table leg as I hit the floor but I didn't even acknowledge the pain. At first Rose was on top of me and she slapped me hard across the face. "What are you gunna do ta stop me." She said as she laughed in my face.

This made me even more furious and I kicked her off of me. But she somehow managed to get on top of me again. This time Rose purposely pressed down on my right shoulder and I cried out in pain. Yet somehow I had managed to get my left arm free and I grabbed the object closest to me, which just happened to be Spots cane. I knew Rose was trying to break my should again, so I pulled it up with all my strength and smacked her hard across the head.

Rose rolled off me in pain and I seen blood dripping down the side of her face. But as I rubbed my forehead I had blood on my hands as well. Suddenly I felt two arms grip me up and pull me to my feet. I looked over and found myself staring at Spot. "What's going on!" He yelled. I could tell by the look in his eyes that the meeting he had with that boy didn't end very well.

Before either Rose or I could speak Booker stood up. "Rose insulted her parents and so Doll attacked her." He said honestly. Spot looked around and most of the boys agreed. Except the ones who Rose has wrapped around her finger.

"Is dat true?" Spot asked looking at her.

The red head quickly got to her feet and stumbled a little. I hope I gave her a concussion. "But I…she…" Rose began but he stopped her.

"I thought I told ya a hundred times before…I don't wan't ya comin around here if you're gunna start trouble." Spot said as stood at my side. I put a hand on his shoulder to calm him down. I didn't want to add to his frustrations. Rose saw me do this and suddenly realization hit her. She looked like a raging bull and I was waiting for her to try and attack me again. I had known for a long time that she still loved Spot even though she pretended to cover it up by hanging on every guy that walked in the room.

"Ya really don't want me ta leave, do ya Spot?" Rose asked with a soft flirty voice. But this seemed to aggravate him even more. I was happy to see that he wanted nothing to do with her anymore.

"Get out!" He said and my gripped tightened on his shoulder for comfort.

"But…" Rose began.

"I said GET OUT!" He screamed and I thought I saw a few people back up. Rose looked taken aback but then turned around and walked out the door.

I could see the mood that he was in and I let go of his shoulder. Spot was very dangerous to mess with when he was angry and I tended to upset him a lot. I didn't want to be his next target. So I thought it best if I just didn't say anything at all. I turned around and walked up the stairs to his room. I wasn't surprised when he didn't follow me. I knew that he had some things to get off his shoulders before he came back up. So I just pulled out the covers Spot had gotten out that morning and fell asleep on the floor at the bottom of his bed.

Thank you:

C.M. Higgins- Hey, I am sorry that I made you cry again. That sucks that you got braces, I had them two years ago and I know how they hurt at first. But it should get better over time. I am so happy that you liked the last chapter. As you can see there was another fight in this one. Hope you liked it!

NadaZimri- I am glad that you liked the last chapter. It was a lot of fun to write. So was this one. I hoped you liked it also.

Estrellalily- Hey, I'm just so happy that you like my story. I know that the whole love triangle is sort of confusing but you'll see what it has to do with later on. I absolutely love your story so much! But I am sorry that I haven't review recently. I have been really busy with some stuff.

Spunkz- I am so happy to know that I am another reader. Its alright that you didn't review. I am just glad to know that you have been reading it and you like it. Thanks so much!

Clover- Thank you so much! Your reviews always make me really happy. Yes, you were right and it does have something to do with Blade. I already have most of the next chapter written as well. But I always wait till the weekend to update. So next Friday you will have the next chapter. The next few chapters won't be as exciting (but I hope still good) because it will be leading up to the big stuff. I hope you liked this chapter. Let me know what you think.

Bess3- HEY! Welcome back! Lol I know how you feel about your computer breaking. Mine did the same thing last year. I am just happy to see that you are reading my story again. I am glad that you liked what I have done with it. I hope to hear from you soon!

Luv ya all,

BlackWiltedRose


	20. Clean Up

Hey everyone!!! Chapter Nineteen is up! I hope you like this as much as I enjoyed writing it. Please Please review and let me know what you think. I got a lot more new reviewers last chapter and I love you guys for reviewing. But I also lost some of my old one's. Where have you gone! Lol Well keep reading and let me know what you think!

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

Chapter Nineteen

I woke up the next day and found myself in a bed. At first I thought that everything had been a dream and that I really was back in Manhattan but then I opened my eyes. I was still in Spots room but I thought that I had fallen asleep on the floor. I sat up and looked over the edge of the bed. There was Spot sleeping on the floor. I growled at his persistence and then laid back down.

My head hurt from where Rose had smacked me the other night. She must have had a ring on because I had a small gash above my right eye. I could hear movement from downstairs and knew that it was probably around time to get up to go selling. So I leaned over once more and shook Spot awake.

"Whaa…" he grumbled as he pulled the covers back up over his head.

I smiled as I shook Spot again and he didn't move. So I took the pillow that I was sleeping on and whacked him in the head with it. I grinned as this time I got a sufficient, "Leave me alone…" Yet that would not do, so I pulled the pillow up again but before I got the chance to bring it down Spot sat up and wrapped his arms around my waist. I screamed out in surprise as he pulled me down onto the floor beside him.

I ended up in a rather awkward position as I laid half on and half off of Spot. I rolled over and laid beside him on the blanket, my head on his pillow. He laid on his side and propped his head up on one elbow to stare at me. "You are to much of a mornin person for me, Dollface." Spot said with a grin as he rubbed his eyes tiredly.

"And that is exactly why ya need someone like me," I said happily. "I mean I don't know what you would do if I wasn't here to wake you up." I said as he leaned forward slightly. I was becoming dazed by our closeness as I felt my skin heat up. I was going to say something else but the words completely slipped my mind when his hand grazed my cheek.

"I don't know what I would do eitha," Spot whispered as he leaned forward and kissed me gently. But the softness didn't last for long when I wrapped my hands around his back and pulled him in almost hungrily, to deepen the kiss. It had been a couple days since we had last been this close. We laid there kissing for a few moments, only breaking apart to breath but soon I felt the familiar warmth of his touch as his hand began to wonder down my body. At this I was brought back to reality and I think Spot noticed my frigidness because he casually brought his hand back up to where it had been previously. I was thankful that he understood that I didn't wish to go any further just yet. So he still remained leaning over me, with a wide grin on his face when he said, "Well when I think about it. I would be able ta get allot more sleep witout ya pesterin me da whole mornin." I laughed and shoved him off of me playfully, as I sat up.

Spot did the same and then got to his feet reluctantly. I stood up and then stretched out my arms. My right shoulder was sore and aching as I rolled it around to try and get some of the tension out. Rose had really done some damaged the other day. I groaned when I realized that I probably had some bruises in places I hadn't even seen yet.

I just stood there and watched Spot as he brushed his hair and put on his red suspenders. Even when he was doing casual things there still seemed to be a slight tension that lingered around him. For the past few days Spot had been extremely stressed out about something and his patience had been wearing thin. I hated seeing him like that so I got up the courage and decided to risk asking about it.

"Why were you so upset last night?" I asked curiously. He looked over at me and then shook his head.

"Nuttin Dollface." He said with a wave of his hand. But I wasn't going to let him get out of it that easily.

"Don't tell me it was nothing Spot. I may have only known you for a few weeks but I can see right through you when you lie. So you might as well tell me now so I don't have to waste my time asking again." He raised an eyebrow and stared at me the same way he always had when I challenged him. Then Spot sighed as he hooked his slingshot into his belt.

"There has just been some problems wit da newsies from Queen's. Dey think dat Brooklyn has to much sellin territory and it aint fair to da rest of da Newsies dat we make more money. When dat aint even true cuz Manhattan makes more dan we do. Wit all of those hoity toity rich folk walkin around all da time." I nodded my head.

"So was that who that boy was yesterday?" I asked curiously.

"Yeah, he was a messenger from Queens." Spot said as he sat down on the bed to tie his boots. Even though I had lived with the newsies for some time now I still didn't understand everything that goes on and preferred not to get in the middle of any confrontations between neighborhoods. So I decided to just leave the conversation behind.

I walked over in front of the mirror and then cringed at my own reflection. It had been a long time since I had really took a good look at myself. My long golden blonde hair was now down to the middle of my back. What used to be beautiful silky curls, was a frizzy mess. My skin was much darker than it used to be and I had a bruise running down my right cheek. I was extremely thin and my dress hung on me loosely where it used to be slightly snug. Tears brimmed my green eyes as I stared at myself. I wanted to cry or to run away and hide somewhere. I just couldn't understand how anyone could think of me as beautiful when I looked like this.

Spot saw my disgruntled expression as I stared at myself in the mirror and he walked over. He wrapped his arms tightly around my waist from behind and sat his head on my shoulder. "Ya look fine," Spot said reading my mind.

I just shook my head and pulled away from him. "How can you say I look fine? I look horrible!" I cried as I flopped down into the chair sitting in front of the desk.

Spot looked down at me exasperatedly. "Look Doll, nobody care's what ya look like aroun' here . I mean look at da rest of us."

"I care about what I look like." I said staunchly. "Ya don't understand, Spot. It feels like it's the only thing in my life that I have control over anymore. Even my vocabulary has been going down hill. Soon I will be looking and talking like…like you." I said with a fake expression of distaste on my face.

Spot found this funny and started laughing. "I have an idea, wait here a moment." I watched as he ran out the door and down the stairs. It didn't take long before he returned with a bucket of water and a wash cloth. "You can stay here while I go sellin today. There is a lock on me door so you can clean yourself up while da boys are away. Then put on a nice dress and fix ya hair. Maybe you will feel betta."

I couldn't help it, I ran up and gave him a big hug. "Thank you so much." He just smiled and kissed me on the cheek.

"But ya gotta promise me that ya won't leave the Lodging House for any reason, until I get back." I nodded my head and then kissed him again. Spot smiled at me and then left, locking the door behind him.

Even though I knew that nobody could get in the room, I waited until the entire building was silent before I removed my dress. I dipped the cloth in the water and shuddered at how cold it was when I placed it on my skin. But it felt wonderful just to remove all of the dirt that I had accumulated over a week of not washing. Yet I was no less horrified when I looked at how brown the water was after I finished cleaning up. It probably would have been clearer had I washed the floor instead.

When I was finished I found one of my favorite summer dresses. It was violet and cream, two color's that matched perfectly with my skin tone . The dress had a square neck line and quarter length sleeves with frill at the ends. It laced up the bodice and had a beautiful golden floral design on the skirt.

The few hours that Spot was out, I had only left the room once and that was when I decided to go refill the bucket of water. After I scrubbed my hair I ran my fingers through gently to separate the curls. Yet it still looked dull and waited down. So I made a decision and after some searching, I located a knife in one of Spots drawers. I would have been startled at the sight of the weapon had I not realized by now how dangerous living on the streets were.

I took the knife and cleaned it off first. Then I took a chunk of my hair and prayed as I sliced it off a little below my shoulders. But when I saw that it turned out ok, I preceded to cut the rest of it off. I made sure to keep it long enough to pull back with a ribbon. But I was shocked when I once again looked into the mirror. It made me happy to actually see a glimpse of my old self, if only in my appearance.

I still had some time left before Spot got back so I decided to clean up his room a bit. I even dared venture downstairs. I washed off many of the tables and picked up random garbage that had been laying around. The only room I didn't clean was the bunkroom because I had a feeling that the boys wouldn't want me touching there belongings. After I was finished, the Lodging House could hardly be considered spotless but it looked fairly decent.

When some of the boys got back I was welcomed with mild appraise. "Wow Dollface, maybe it won't be so bad havin ya around here after all." Booker said laughing and I shoved him in the shoulder.

"Well I had the time so I figured I might as well do something useful," I said as Spot walked up and put his arm around my shoulder.

"So I see ya took my advice," he laughed looking around. I nodded my head happily.

"Yeah and after I finished I decided to clean up around here a little bit also. No offense but I think it needed it. "

"Ya look beautiful." He whispered as he leaned in and kissed me on the cheek.

We walked over together and took a seat at a table in the far corner of the room. Spot told me about his day while we finished eating what was left of the loaf of bread that he had bought yesterday. Then in return he listened as I told him what I did for the few hours that he was gone. I was happy when Spot commented about my hair, saying that although it looked nice before the new change looked even better.

Soon we were playing a game of poker and Booker decided to join us. I was doing a fairly decent job but Spot was much better than myself and beat me most of the time. It didn't matter to me because I was using some of his money anyway. Spot lent it to me in the first place knowing that he would win it back.

After we had been playing for a few hours Spot began looking around curiously. "What's wrong?" I asked as I laid my cards out on the table.

"I was just wonderin why Blade neva came back last night." Spot said.

"Well, didn't you say that sometimes they find other places to stay?" I asked inquisitively.

"Yeah, but Blade has been livin here since he was five and never once has he not come back." Booker replied.

"I just been getting a strange feelin about him lately. He has been testin my patience a lot." Spot said as he clenched his fist together when he spoke.

"It's my fault isn't it?" I asked quietly. Both Booker and Spot looked over at me with wide eyes.

"Why would it be your fault, Doll?" Spot asked.

"Because every time you fight, its about me." I said softly. I hated being the cause of so many problems and conflicts. Ever since I had come into there lives I had been nothing but a nuisance to everyone.

"It aint your fault dat Blade has been actin like dis. He had been causin problems for weeks before ya even showed up." Spot said comfortingly as he gave me a reassuring smile.

I became quiet as Spot and Booker went into a long conversation about everything that was going on with Queens. It began to rain outside as the sun went down and I looked out the small window as the water ran down the glass. Ever since I was a little girl I had always loved to listen to the rain. It helped me to wash away everything bad that has happened in my life.

Suddenly the door to the Lodging House opened up and in walked Blade. He was soaking wet and water was dripping from his dark brown hair. I looked over at Spot and watched as he stood up to go talk to him. There was something intimidating about Blade as he stood there in the doorway with the storm raging behind him. I was tempted to grab onto Spot's arm and hold him back. But I knew that I was just being overprotective and that nothing would happen.

In order to stay calm I decided to talk to Booker. " So, how have you been?" I asked. It had been a long time since I had last had a normal conversation with him.

"Alright, I guess." He said and if I wasn't mistaken I could hear a slight change in his voice. I got the feeling that there was something missing when we talked to each other now and I knew it had to do with Spot.

"So…what book are you reading?" I asked trying to change the subject onto something we both enjoyed. For a little while we discussed different novels and what they meant to each of us. Booker preferred intensely stimulating books that teach life lessons in too many complicated verses. I on the other hand loved to read romance stories which he found to be a waste of time. This always created a very heated discussion which neither of us ever won.

Even though I was in the middle of a conversation with a friend I couldn't help sneaking multiple looks over at Spot who was still talking to Blade in the corner of what I would begin to call the congregation room. Eventually Booker started to notice and he smiled. "Somehow I don't think Spot is gunna drop down dead any second, Doll." Booker replied with a laugh. "So I think it would be alright for ya ta stop worryin."

"I know…its just that Blade really makes me nervous." I said cautiously while trying not to sound like a pathetic girl, which is exactly what I was.

"Spot knows how ta handle himself," Booker said and I nodded my head, trying to believe that he was right. But I couldn't help praying that Spot would keep his temper down and not do anything rash.

But to my relief Spot came stomping back over to the table a few minutes later. He sat down forcefully and propped his feet up on the empty chair beside him. For a little while, Spot just sat there with an intense glare on his face. I knew he was thinking about something and I decided not to bother him at first. But soon the silence was becoming unbearable and I turned to him. "Whats wrong?" I asked questioningly.

He looked over at me as if warning me not to get involved. But then Spot realized that I wasn't going to give up and he would be better off just telling me what was going on rather than causing another conflict. Besides Booker was still sitting beside me and he wanted to know just as much as I did. "Oh alright, I'll tell ya!" Spot said as he sat up in his chair and looked at the both of us. " I asked Blade where he was las' night and guess what he told me." Booker and I looked at each other while trying to guess but we eventually gave up. "Well our little friend over dar' stayed wit his buddy's in Queens."

At first I didn't understand what the big deal was but then I remembered what Spot had told me yesterday. How that messenger showed up and said that Brooklyn had to much selling territory or something. But if Brooklyn was fighting with them, then why would Blade be staying in Queens?

Booker was asking the same question when he turned to Spot. "I got's a bad feelin about dis'."

Spot nodded his head as he took out a cigar from his pocket and placed it in his mouth. I hated the offal smell of them and was happy when he didn't light it. It began to get late when I excused myself to go to the bathroom. Booker and Spot were discussing some irrelevant things and didn't even notice that I had left at first.

On the way down a hallway I passed by an open doorway where a few boys were talking and I stopped when I heard Spots name. When I listened closely I realized it was Blade who was speaking. There seemed to be two other boys in the room that I didn't recognize.

"So ya really gunna go through wit it?" asked a boy with a high pitched voice.

"Of course I am," Blade said menacingly. "Spot needs ta learns dat he aint as invincible as he tinks' he is."

"But he is da leada' around here," said the other boy.

"Well I tink' its about time dat Brooklyn got's a new leada'," Blade retorted. "Besides Spot doesn't care about anything now but dat new goil of his."

"She isn't dat bad," said the boy with the high pitched voice. But then the other kid cut in.

"I heard dat she's got's thousands a dollars in da bank." Blade began to laugh.

"Ya see, Spot only does what's best for em'. He doesn't care about da rest of da house. He's only goin out wit Doll cuz he knows he'd get da money."

"I'd sleep wit er' for dat much money," said the high pitched voice.

"Hell, I'd sleep wit her for nuthin." the other boy said. "She's da best lookin goil I'd eva' seen."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I was so angry that I wanted to bust into the room and start screaming at them. How dare they say such disgraceful things about Spot and myself. But no matter how hard I tried I couldn't help thinking that they may be right. It never even crossed my mind before that Spot would only be with me for my money. Then I remembered how interested he was in Manhattan when I first told them how much money I had in the bank.

Wait! I couldn't believe that I was actually even considering this. Spot cared about me, he wouldn't use me for my money. I shook my head and walked back into the congregation room. I guess Spot could see the unnerving look on my face because when I sat down he looked at me concerned. "Whats wrong Dollface?"

I contemplated on whether or not I should tell him about what I just overheard. But somehow I knew of what it would result in and I couldn't take another fight because of me. So I reluctantly decided to keep this to myself. "Nothing," I replied carelessly. Spot looked at me for a few seconds and then nodded his head. But I knew that he didn't believe me and he would ask me about it later. "I'm really tired, I think I'll go to bed." I said as I got to my feet.

Spot nodded his head, "Goodnight."

When I made it back up to his room I sat down on the bed and placed my head in my hands. What was I going to do? In my heart I knew that I should probably tell Spot what Blade had said. But then I knew that it would mean that I would have to explain what they said about me as well.

Finally I decided that I would just worry about it tomorrow as I got the blankets and fell asleep once more on the floor. Later on that night I woke up and smiled as I found that Spot had placed me back in the bed. I laughed once more at how stubborn he was. I knew that as long as I was here Spot would never give up and sleep in his own bed. So I stood up, grabbed my blankets and curled up next to him on the floor. I figured that if neither of us could win, then we both would lose together.

****

Thank you:

C.M. Higgins- You are one of the few people who review like every chapter. So thanks so much! I can't wait till you update Spots Milkshake. I love that story allot. Sorry I haven't had the chance to review Learning Magic. I have just been so busy working on my two stories. But I am going to read it today. I hope you liked this chapter of my story, it probably wasn't as good as the rest of them.

kikki- Thanks you so much for the compliment and I am so happy that you like my story.

Spunkz- I'm glad you liked the last chapter, I had a fun time writing it. Yeah I planned out what is going to happen in every chapter and it just turned out to be 30 chapters. I was surprised because I never thought it would end up that long. But I'm glad that I still have peoples attention.

clover- Your reviews always make me happy! Because you always say such nice things. Yeah I always loved writing Spot when he's angry, I don't know, its just fun. I'm glad you guessed that it will have something to do with Blade because it doesn't seem like many people had figured that out yet. I know that this chapter wasn't as interesting as the other ones but it was one of those filler chapters that leads to something else that is going to happen.

Vacant Skies- Hey! I am so happy that you like my story. Thanks for the compliment but I'm not that great of a writer. I mean look at all of the mistakes that I make in every chapter. But your welcome, I love your story and I was so happy that you updated.

Dimonah Tralon- Thank you so much! I am also very happy that you decided to read my story. I do apologize ahead of time for all of the spelling and grammar mistakes that I made. When I go back over it, I like cringe because there are so many things that I messed up on. So it makes me really happy that people still like my story anyway. Yeah I did take awhile to get Spot and Hanna together, but like you said I though that it would make it more realistic. I mean people don't just meet for a day and fall in love. Especially when there is that much stuff separating them.

swimade333- Thank you so much! I am so happy that you looked passed the spelling mistakes because I made a lot of them. My reviewers always comment on that and I feel bad, but I am horrible at checking my stuff. I have been re reading my story and I have some corrections that I need to make. But I won't be able to do that until I finish the story. I'm very happy that you liked the kiss. I did enjoy writing that and I hope you enjoyed this chapter as well. Don't forget to let me know what you think, review's mean a lot to me.

Shortstack- Well I am really happy to see that you got caught up once more. Lol I know what you mean about the morning breath thing, I have a strange obsession with brushing teeth as well. But I knew that back then they didn't really have that great of a sense of hygiene. As you can see, there was another morning kiss in this one to. I will have to see what I can do about that. Oh and just to clear up everything about the Manhattan newsies. Well it isn't that they don't want her to be with Spot. Most of them didn't even know that they liked each other. It was only Racetrack who didn't want her going out with him and that was because he knew how Spot used to treat girls. So since he was friends with Hanna and cared about her, he was worried about her liking Spot. Because he didn't want Spot to treat her like he did his other girlfriends.

Luv ya all,

BlackWiltedRose


	21. Dream's and Reality

Here it is everyone! Chapter Twenty…only Ten more chapters to go. I hope that you are enjoying reading this as much as I enjoy writing it. This chapter is a filler but don't worry, next chapter will be more exciting. That's when things start to get intense. Well keep reviewing and let me know what you think.

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

Chapter Twenty

I felt a hand brush my cheek and I opened my eyes to see Spot staring back at me. I yawned and smiled as he kissed me on the forehead. "Good morning beautiful," he whispered softly in my ear.

I looked back into Spot's intense blue eyes, highly amused at his loving behavior and began to wonder what his friends would think had they seen him now. He worked so hard on putting up a protective barrier around himself that I had once thought it impossible to start a relationship with him. Spot lived off of making others feel intimidated by his presence, that was how he kept control of situations. He did not wish to come off as someone weak or to soft to fear, so I no longer took offense to his lack of affection towards me in public.

Spot got up and walked over to pull a shirt out of his small wooden dresser. It was almost identical to the one he had on at the time but looked somewhat cleaner. I could not help but stare at his well toned stomach muscles when he removed his shirt and pulled the other one on over his head. When Spot was finished he walked out of the bedroom and went downstairs so I could get dressed. I decided to just put on my familiar blue skirt and white blouse. Because there was no need for anything special today.

It didn't take me long to do my hair and I left the room feeling rather exhausted. I didn't get much rest the night before because it was rather uncomfortable sleeping on the hard wood floor. I spent most of the night just thinking about everything and staring at Spot as he slept. I still couldn't understand how I could love him so much, when not so long ago we hated the sight of each other.

Wait! I didn't love him…I couldn't love him. But yet I found that my feelings for him were more intense than anything that I had ever felt before. If it wasn't love then what was it?

I shook my head and sighed as I opened the door and walked down into the congregation room. I caught a glimpse of the same sight that I had seen for the past few days. All of the boys sat around smoking and laughing as they joked about things that I would never understand. It had become like second nature to me as I made my way through the throng of young men and sat down at the table next to Spot.

The moment I took a seat I began to feel an unwelcome ache in my stomach when I looked at the boy sitting next to me as he ate an apple. I hadn't eaten since early yesterday morning and I was craving the taste of food. But I had no money and I couldn't expect Spot to pay for me again when he couldn't even pay for himself. So I sighed and tried to push the hunger into the back of my mind.

I crossed my arms on the table and laid my head down on them tiredly. I looked around and began to realize just how much gratitude the boys in this room deserved. They had to get up everyday at dawn just to go out and sell the newspapers. It didn't matter if they were starving to death or had an hour of sleep the night before. They got up anyway and did there job, because that's what it takes for them to survive.

Then there was me on the other hand. I had no job, no money and I slouched around everyday feeling sorry for myself. So you couldn't exactly say that what I was doing was surviving. It was more like just existing.

Before my parents died I was nothing but a useless pawn in the game of life. I couldn't move, eat or speak unless someone told me to and the whole purpose of my existence was to be the best. It didn't matter who or what I had to crush in my path to get there. But now when I look upon the tired, ruthless faces of the boys that sat before me, I realized guiltily that I had once played a part in the slow destruction of there lives. Maybe the things that I did never really had a direct effect on them but every time I thought that I was better than someone or the days when I would refuse to buy a newspaper for a single penny from a homeless boy on the street. That was how I contributed to the corruption of society.

I looked over at Spot and began to wonder what he really thought of me the first day that we met in Tibby's Restaurant. I wondered if he truly hated me and if so what made him change his mind. Spot saw me staring at him and he reached out to put his arm around me as I laid my head upon his shoulder.

It was hard for me as I came to realization that everything my parents had taught me was a lie. Because they are the two people who are suppose to love you unconditionally not matter what happens. Yet for so many years of my life they had only told me what they wanted me to hear instead of what really happens. I had asked my mother once, what love was and she told me that it was the feeling that two people have for one another. She said that when I married a decent young man and created a beautiful household for my future children, then I would understand. But I had always believed that there was something more to love than just creating a perfect life together, more feeling…more emotion. Besides how could my parents describe love to me when they hardly knew what it was themselves.

I was so exhausted that I began to fall asleep on Spots shoulder. It wasn't until I felt him move and heard the loud bang of the Lodging House door, that I snapped out of my slight stupor. I looked over and standing in the doorway was a tall dark haired boy. He had on brown trousers that were held up by a pair of black suspenders and he wore a tan collared shirt with the sleeves rolled to his elbows. He had on a black hat that shaded part of his face but I could still make out deep brown eyes that stared sternly over at Spot. I sat up straight as the kid made his way over towards our table.

A lot of the Brooklyn Boys gathered around as Spot said "What are ya doin here?" The new arrival just stood there smirking and I kind of got the hint that he was from Queens.

"Ya know why I'm here Spot," he said as he took out a cigarette and blew the smoke in my face. I crinkled my nose and turned my head away. "We need da talk."

"Well den talk," Spot said ruthlessly.

"Alone," the boy replied as he pointed up to Spots room. I could tell by the way that the newcomer was fidgeting with his hands that he was becoming nervous as the other boys gathered around.

"No, whateva ya gotta say. Ya say it not just ta me but ta the rest of me boys." Spot replied with a smirk on his face.

"Fine!" The boy said as he pulled up a chair beside me. I scooted over closer to Spot as the kid looked me up and down. "Ya, know what I'm gunna say Spot. Have ya reconsidered our offer about da territory situation?"

When the boy finished Spot laughed and slammed his hand down on the table as he got to his feet. "Oh yeah! Hear dis boys! Queens came ta me a couple days ago saying dat we have to much territory ta sell in. Dey wan't us ta give up some of our's ta dem."

"Ya do know dat if ya don't agree den there are gunna be some problems." The kid said and if I wasn't mistaken he seemed to be looking at me when he said this. I think Spot saw this also because he snatched the boy up by the shirt and yanked him across the table.

"Does it look like I'm scared?" Spot yelled and then threw the kid backwards. I watched as the chair toppled over and the boy rolled onto the floor. Then Spot addressed the rest of the newsies in the room. "Did ja' hear dat boys? He said der are gunna be some problems. Now what do ya tink' we otta do about dat?"

A coarse of voices that yelled 'Soak em' rang throughout the old Lodging House. I stepped back as Spot smiled maliciously and got to his feet. "Exactly," he replied as he walked over and pulled the boy up into a standing position. I could see then that the kid was about the same size as him or a little bit taller.

I watched as Spot pulled the boy outside into the sunlight and dragged him over to the edge of the dock. With great ease he lifted the boy up and threw him into the river. When the dark haired kid resurfaced Spot yelled down. "Now ya tell your boy's from Queen's dat we will be waitin and if ya step into Brooklyn again I'll really soak ya!"

The boy sputtered incoherently as he swam to the shore. I looked around at most of the Brooklyn newsies as they stood there laughing and pointing at him. I don't know what made me look over at Blade but he didn't seem at all amused. He wasn't even looking at the boy in the water, he was staring directly at Spot with a glare so intense that it made my insides freeze. Last time I checked Blade was a Brooklyn newsie…so why was he so angry about Spots behavior.

The boy from Queens climbed out of the water and then turned around to stare at all of us. "You'll regret dis Conlon!" he yelled.

Spot acted as if he didn't hear a word the boy had said as he turned around and walked back into the Lodging House. I followed him quickly but by the time I got back in he was already upstairs in his room with the door locked. I was worried about him but I decided that it was best just to let him have his thinking time alone.

It didn't take long before Spot came out of his room and joined us at the table. It was Booker, Brass, Spot and myself all sitting around talking. We decided not to play cards like we normally did because none of us had money. But soon they had to leave because it was time for them to go sell the morning edition.

Spot asked me to come with him to sell and I agreed. I would have stayed back in the Lodging House like I had yesterday but for some odd reason I was afraid to be alone. I think it was because of all the stuff that has been going on with Queens and the strange looks Blade has been giving me lately.

It was still a little bit cloudy outside when Spot and I left to go to the distribution center that day. The wind was blowing hard and the light blue ribbon in my hair blew into the river. I was began to shiver and wrapped my arms across my chest tightly. I think Spot saw me because he put his arm around my shoulders for warmth. When we arrived I decided that I would sell that day, so I handed him a few coins and asked Spot to buy me some. He came back and handed me twenty papers.

The headline was fairly decent that day so it didn't take us very long to sell most of them. I found a large group of young men from the upper class and after a little bit of charming had managed to sell my last five papers. When I met back up with Spot who was across the street we started to make our way back to the Lodging House.

The sky had cleared up and the sun was now shining brightly in the sky. Although you could still see the faint glimmer of black clouds as they lingered in the distance. I lifted my skirt up as I stepped onto the dock and had to wait while Spot moved a bunch of old crates that had toppled over during the night. Booker nodded his head towards us when we made it to the Lodging House door. He was sitting out with his feet hanging off the dock, smoking a cigarette casually.

"Just so ya know Spot, ya got some visitors," Booker said and I could hear Spot growl in annoyance. I knew he was already testy and not in the mood for another run in with Queens.

I pushed on the wooden door and it opened with great ease but when I walked inside I stopped quickly. Because I noticed a very familiar looking boy sitting at a table to the right, talking to Bark and Sixer.

"How ya doin Dollface?" The voice of Jack Kelly asked as Spot pushed me further into the room.

"Fine," I replied coolly.

He just nodded his head understandingly. Jack knew not to push the limit of my kindness at the moment and so he turned to talk to Spot. "Spec's was sellin in Brooklyn taday and he told me what is happenin wit Queen's. So I decided ta stop by."

"So I see," Spot said as he walked over to his fellow leader. "But what's dis got's ta do wit you."

Jack just smirked, he knew by now how to deal with Spot's lack of kindness when it came to certain situations. "Cuz were friends and when dey mess wit you dey mess wit us."

Spot tilted his head to the side and took what Jack said into consideration. On the streets it was a role that you trusted nobody but yourself. They had been raised that only the strongest survive and even the word of friendship was under scrutiny. But I could tell that the relationship between Jack and Spot had been built up over many years of tribulation. That even though they acted like they were just mere acquaintances, on the inside they were true brothers at heart.

Eventually Spot nodded his head and spit in his hand as they shook to signify the agreement. As I stood there and witnessed the unification of two rather large neighborhoods I began to wonder if Queen's realized just what they had gotten themselves into. But then I also had the strange feeling that they knew what was going to happen and that they had something secret planned that backed up there sudden unfailing confidence.

My instincts began to show there true color as the days went on and what I had guessed only became more apparent. The boy from Queen's was right as each day the situation became more and more dangerous. Brooklyn boys were getting jumped in local alley ways and on the street's while selling in broad daylight. I began spending most of my time tending to black eyes and bloody lips.

Each night Spot made sure that every newsie was back in the Lodging House by 8:00pm and the doors and windows were bolted shut. I began to become increasingly more nervous as the days went on. Wondering what was going to happen next and who the next victim would be. I prayed every night before I went to sleep that Spot would be alright and I found myself incapable of closing my eyes until he came in to go to bed.

While he was out taking care of _business_ I started to spend more time with Booker. I saw Spot every morning when I woke up and each night when I went to sleep. But most of the day he was out making plans, selling the papers and talking with boys from other neighborhoods.

Booker was all to willing to oblige when I asked him if I could spend my time with him while this whole situation got worked out. I was to scared to walk around alone and since Spot was busy I figured that Booker would be my next best option. He turned out to be a rather entertaining companion. We spent most days hanging around the Lodging House, talking and playing an occasional game of cards. The more we got to know each other the better friends we became.

Soon a week had passed by and Booker and I were walking along the dock outside. The day was cool and clean, with the pungent odor of fish lingering in the air as it always did when you were by the river. A slight breeze was blowing the curls back from my face and brushed my skirt gently against my legs. I walked over and sat down on a pile of old boxes while Booker jumped up onto a wooden post.

For a little while we remained quiet, just thinking about things and enjoying the peacefulness that came from such a beautiful summer day. I found myself thinking about the future and what laid ahead of me. I began to think about how much the newsies had changed me and what I would be doing in a few years.. Then I began to recall all of my past forgotten dreams. Things that I had wanted to do ever since I was a little girl. I looked over at Booker and he smiled at me.

" Did you ever think about what you wanted to do with your life?" I asked him thoughtfully.

He looked at me questioningly at first but then his face softened. It wasn't everyday that someone asked a newsie what they planned on doing with there life. " I have no idea. Neva really thought about it I guess. Besides I don't think there is much hope for me really. I'll probably just end up workin in a factory or on a steam boat somewhere. I mean I can't be a newsie forever, although sometimes I wish dat I could." I felt sadness rush through me when Booker finished speaking. I was to busy thinking about myself to even consider what would happen to my friends.

They didn't have a future as clear as my own. I knew that by the time I was twenty one I would have thousands of dollars at my disposal, more money than I knew what to do with. But Booker had nothing but false hopes and useless dreams. The same thing went for Spot, and Jack and Racetrack. What was going to happen to them when they grew to old to sell papers?

"What are ya gunna do when ya get your inheritance?" Booker asked me curiously. I turned to him and smiled softly as I sighed.

"I used to dream about the day when I would be on my own. The things I would do and the places I would go. But things change, I've changed and I don't know if its really what I want anymore." I replied. But Booker shook his head.

"Of course ya know what ya want, all ya gotta do is listen to what ya heart tell's ya." He replied, mimicking a line from one of our favorite novels.

"Alright then… The first thing I want to do is get out of this horrid city. I want to live in the country, or on top of a hill overlooking the ocean. I remember how my mother used to have a painting in her bedroom of a beautiful Victorian house. It was light blue with purple shutters and had a garden lining the pathway that led up to the wrap around porch. I used to dream that I lived in that house and could almost picture myself sitting on the swing, reading a book on a hot summer's day." I spun around with my arms out and my head tilted up at the sky. I laughed as looked at the expression on Bookers face. "I want to travel and see the world, I hate being tied down to a single peace of land. But I want one special place to call home. That no matter how far away I get, I know that its always there waiting for me to return."

"Dat sounds nice," Booker said smiling.

I stopped laughing and the jubilant expression on my face was washed away as reality once again showed its horrid face. "But it's only a dream," I said sternly. "Nothing more!"

Booker looked confused as I turned around and walked over to sit down on the boxes again. I had to stop living in a fantasy world. Because I had to learn to face reality and to except it for what it was. For every time that I started dreaming about the future something bad happens. Life was no fairy tale and if I started to lose myself in my dreams, I began to take for granted all that I had in the present.

Sitting there on the dock I began to realize just how truly alone I felt. It felt like I was drowning in the river again but this time nobody was there to help me. I knew deep down that I was slowly falling into oblivion and the only one who could save me was myself. Because I was fighting things inside my soul that only I knew existed.

I had spent my entire life just sitting around waiting for the day when I would finally just be satisfied with what I had. But there was only one thing that made me happy and he was out roaming the streets of Brooklyn. I didn't realize until just then how much I needed Spot Conlon. Because he loved me unconditionally and without expectations. I didn't feel like I needed to impress him or to be anything more than what I was. He listened to what I had to say and he did his best to make me happy. He was the one piece of the puzzle that I had been missing since the day I was born.

Thank you:

C.M. Higgins- Hey! I am so happy that you asked me to do a story with you. It will be so exciting. I am so happy that you like my story. This chapter wasn't the best…but next chapter will be fun. Yeah Blade is evil and he gets worse as the story goes on. I will try as best as I can to think of stuff for the story we are going to write. But until this is finished I wont be able to work to much on it. Just a few more weeks and it will be finished. Also keep it up with your stories! I love them a lot!

CuddleMonkey05- I am so glad you like my story. I really do love your story a lot! You are doing a great job with it. Thank you so much and I hope you liked this chapter as well.

Spunkz- I'm happy you enjoyed the last chapter. This one wasn't that interesting but it was just another filler chapter. I like the next chapter, things become more interesting. Yeah Blade is evil and he will have a major part in what's to come. No Spot isn't just using Hanna for her money, but she was just paranoid that he was. I am also very excited that you like how I developed my characters. I tried really hard on making them seem realistic. Well I hope that you like this chapter even though it wasn't very exciting.

Splashey- Your Back! I am so happy to see that you still like my story. I thought you stopped reading it. Yeah Rose definitely needs some help. Your correct about something's that you guessed and wrong about the others…but I don't want to tell you because it will ruin the suspense of the story. Lol I am just so happy that you are back and I hope you review when you get the chance.

Dimonah Tralon- Yeah Blade is up to no good…but you won't find out what it is until later. I hope you liked this chapter, it was just another filler chapter. The next one will be better, I promise.

Swimade333- I'm so, so happy that you like my story that much. Your compliment means the world to me. I could hardly say that my stories the best, but to know that someone thinks so is so wonderful. This chapter wasn't great but its just a filler chapter. The next one will be really interesting. I am also very happy that you got your sister to read it to. I don't know if I told you or not but I update this story every Friday. Well I hope to hear from you again.

Brooklyn-Bailey Conlon- Hi! I am so happy that you decided to read my story and that you actually liked it. Yes, I really did love your poems I think you are a very good writer. I would love to write a story with you. My other friend actually asked me to write a story with her also. This is going to be fun. But like I told her, I wont be able to work really hard on it until I finish this story which will be another couple of weeks. But think of idea's for stories and let me know if you come up with anything.

NadaZimri- Hey! Welcome back, its alright that it took you awhile to review. I understand, I have been so busy lately that I have had hardly any time to do anything. I am glad you liked those last two chapters. They are just sort of fillers for what is about to happen. Things start to get more intense as the story goes on. Well I hope to hear from you soon.

Joker is Poker with a J- Just so you know, I think your pen name is cute. But thank you so much! I am so glad that you like my story. Yes, I know its really long…I can never get the hang of writing short chapter stories. I still have ten more chapters to go. There are going to be 30 chapters all together. I hope you liked this chapter, it wasn't very interesting but its just a filler chapter. The next one is going to be fun to write. Well I hope to hear from you again.

Koodles4You- Thank you so much for all of the compliments on my first chapter. Did you end up continuing or did you get bored and stop. If you ever get to this chapter, let me know what you think. I hope you still liked it and that you continued reading.

Luv ya all,

BlackWiltedRose


	22. A Date, A Fight and other Things

Hey Everyone! I loved writing this chapter so much and I think you will really enjoy it. Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed (and to those who didn't) I really appreciate you taking the time to read my story. I would be really happy if you would take the time to read my songfic also. it's a one shot, Spot/OC romance story. Well keep reviewing and letting me know what you think.

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me and all those who you don't recognize.

Chapter Twenty-One

Spot refused to let me go selling with him the next morning because he said that it was to dangerous and he didn't want me to end up getting hurt. The attacks on the Brooklyn newsies had become more frequent as time went on and Spot was waiting for the day when they would come after him. I was slightly upset because I wanted to spend some time with him that day but I understood his request and agreed to stay back at the Lodging House.

The weather outside was rather pleasant, unlike my mood at the time. I stalked around the old fishing shack and tried to find something to do while the boys were out making money. Over the last week and a half the Brooklyn boys had actually grown to accept me among them and had been treating me rather kindly for the past few days. Ever since the attacks started and I began taking care of them like they were my brothers.

But I didn't have to wait for long because Spot had sold all of his papers rather quickly that day and ended up returning sooner than I had expected. I was sitting at a table, playing solitaire, when he walked in. I was startled to see that Spot actually looked rather pleasant, with a bright smile on his face. It was something that I rarely got to see but loved very dearly.

I watched amused as Spot walked over to the table and sat down next to me. "Why are you so happy?" I asked.

"Oh, nuttin," he said casually as he placed his feet up on the table and tilted his chair back on two legs.

"Hmm, ok," I said disbelievingly.

Spot and I loved playing these crazy mind games with each other. It was like a contest where we would both battle to try and see what the other one was thinking. Of course he won most of the time because I had little experience with hiding my emotions. But every so often I could catch him off guard and break through the barrier.

"So…how was selling today?" I asked trying to start onto a different conversation.

Instead of answering me Spot leaned over and kissed me on the lips. When he pulled away he looked into my eyes and said. "It was perfect."

"Oh, was it?" I said smiling at the jubilant expression on his face.

"Yes," he replied as he stood up and began pacing on the floor in front of me. Then Spot turned around quickly and took my hand. "Come wit me," he said.

Even though I must have been looking at him like he was insane I did what he asked. "Where are we going?"

"I finally saved up enough money ta take ya out on a real date," he said happily.

I opened my mouth to say something as Spot pulled me outside into the brisk summer sunshine, but then I closed it again. When I spoke, my voice was soft and thoughtful. "Spot, you really don't have to do this. I thought our last date was wonderful."

"Your not gettin out of it dat easy Dollface," Spot replied laughing as he wrapped his arm around my waist. "Ya know, I think I might actually like havin ya around all da time."

"Well that's good," I said sarcastically as I laid my head on his shoulder.

"Ya know what I mean," Spot said as I smiled at him and nodded my head.

We walked down the musty streets of Brooklyn, arm in arm, just taking in the wonderful feeling that we got from just being together. I wondered where he was taking me but I knew that it didn't matter. I had missed spending time with Spot, just the two of us. Back at the Lodging House you didn't really get the chance because there were always twenty other boys lingering around at all times. So this was a welcomed change from our normal routine.

"Where are ya taking me?" I asked him as I stepped over a stick that was laying on the sidewalk. He just looked at me and smiled.

"You'll see," Spot said and I gave him a questioning glance.

We continued walking for awhile and the muscles in my legs were starting to hurt. By now the sun was directly above us and tiny beads of sweat were trickling down my forehead. But eventually the sun began to go down and it became slightly cooler. I was thankful when Spot finally stopped me outside of a small Italian restaurant. It looked ancient but was well taken care of, with a deck on the back that overlooked the river. I turned to Spot and smiled.

"So what do ya think?" he asked.

"Its wonderful!" I exclaimed. Spot just smiled as he put his arm around my shoulders and we walked into the restaurant together.

An old man came out of the kitchen and raised up his hands as he walked over. "Spot Conlon, long time no see!" The old man said happily as he patted Spot on the back.

"Well ya know I got's things ta do." Spot said nonchalantly. The old man continued to smile and nodded his head.

"Yes, Yes…so who is this young lady?" He asked pleasantly.

"Oh yeah, dis is Hanna Grimmuald," Spot replied as he motioned towards me. I was waiting for the man to give me the same strange stare that everyone did when they mentioned my name, but it never came. He just smiled and shook my hand. "Hanna dis is Mr. Butler he owns da joint." Spot continued.

"Its very nice to meet you," I said and he smiled.

"Uhh yes…she's a nice one," Mr. Butler replied as he looked over at Spot who just nodded his head promptly. "I always new ya'd come to your senses."

I laughed as I watched Spot give him a threatening glare which happened to turn in my direction. I did my best to stop laughing but I still had a wide grin on my face when Mr. Butler led us out onto the deck out back. It was so beautiful as lamps were hung up all along the wooden beams and I could see roses at the center of every table. The moon was out now and it was reflecting calmly off the river below us.

Spot held out my chair as we sat down at one of the tables. A waitress who was in her early twenty's walked over and asked what we wanted for a beverage. I ordered sweet tea and Spot got the same thing. I looked over at him curiously. "I didn't know you liked tea?" I asked.

"Well ya don't know a lot of things about me," He answered slowly. I just nodded my head as I flicked through the menu.

"But I'm willing to learn," I replied softly and he looked over at me. I could just see the shimmer of blue in his eyes and the reflection of the flame from the candle that burned between us. I knew that it was hard for Spot to accept the fact that I wanted to be in his life. I wanted to know everything about his past, present and prayed that I would be in his future. But I knew that he thought that I was something that could leave him at any moment.

Even though I tend to hide it from myself, I knew deep down that I loved him. Yet it was up to Spot to decide whether he loved me back. But to him love was nothing more than something that caused him pain. He was strong and so he shielded himself from anything and everything that would harm him. He had been torn apart by love and I wondered dearly if he would ever look past the pain and see that love doesn't always hurt, it heals.

Some people would say that I am trying to change Spot. But that's not what I want to do at all. I am trying to fix what had been done to him and make him someone that he can truly be proud of. It's a horrible thing to see someone wear away until they can't even recognize themselves anymore. I don't want that to happen to him, like it happened to myself.

"I know," Spot said and then looked back down at his menu.

He was never an affectionate person and I knew he never would be. But all I cared about were the little things and so I was happy with the simple fact that I had finally gotten through to Spot. If even to just let him know that I cared about everything that he was and I would always be there.

The waitress returned and we ordered our meals. I got pasta with meat sauce and Spot got some kind of chicken and rice that had a strange name that I couldn't pronounce. We sat in a comfortable silence for awhile while we waited for our food to arrive.

I was startled when Spot finally spoke. "Did ya like being rich?" he asked me.

I looked over at him cautiously and wondered what he wanted my answer to be. I gave up eventually and decided that there was no use but to speak the truth. "In a way I did, but not entirely. I don't think that anybody is ever truly happy with what they have. Like any girl I loved having new dresses and jewelry to fawn over, large meals every day and a beautiful house. But I was trapped within the confinements of my life." I felt my face flush as I looked over at Spot expecting him to look at me like I was spoiled and selfish. But that was not what I saw, he was staring at me with compaction and understanding. Two things that completely contradicted everything that Spot Conlon was. "If you ever knew what suffocating felt like, that's how I felt every day of my life."

"So ya wouldn't give anything ya have, ta get your old life back?" Spot said. I wondered why he kept asking me these types of questions. But I put my curiosity to the side and answered him. It felt good to just talk and let all of my emotions out. I hated hiding things from him and that's what I would be doing if I didn't speak the truth.

"I would give anything in my life to have my parents back. But I do not wish to go back to living as I had." Spot looked into my eyes for a few moments and it was a good thing I was sitting because I could feel my knee's go weak. He was testing me, trying to figure out whether or not I was serious about what I spoke of. I knew I had passed when he smiled softly and then looked over the railing at the river.

Our food came a few minutes later and I was thankful for the interruption. We had small conversation while we were eating, about the newsies and things that had happened in the past. He mentioned the strike that went on last year and how they had beaten Pulitzer into lowering the price and giving them 100% refunds for papers that they don't sell. Spot also told me how he met Jack when he was four years old and they became quick friends after Jack's mother died and his father went to prison.

When we finished speaking there was a few quiet moments before soft music filled the air. It was coming from the tavern across the street. I looked up smiling, as a few old couples in the restaurant stood up and started to dance. I quickly got to my feet and turned to Spot. "Dance with me."

He looked surprised and shocked at the same time, as he shook his head vigorously. "I don't dance."

I made a pouting face and stared down at Spot hopefully, "Pleeease," I asked sweetly.

"Ya don't understand Doll," He said and then he lowered his voice as if embarrassed. "I don't know how ta dance."

My smile just got bigger as I took his hand in my own. "Here, I'll teach you." I pulled him up into a standing position and he followed reluctantly as I pulled him into the center where the other couples were. "Just follow me."

I placed his arms on my waist and I wrapped mine around his neck. After a few instructions and slightly sore feet, I had managed to make him into a pretty decent dancer. Soon I was laying my head in the crook of his neck and could smell the familiar sent of tobacco and aftershave. "Ya know, dis isn't dat bad." Spot said warmly.

"Hmm," was all I managed to say. The music floating through the air and the feeling of tranquility that I got when Spot held me in his arms, was nothing more than magical. I wanted to savior every second of this day so that I would never forget how wonderful I felt at that moment.

"Can I ask ya something," Spot said as he pulled his head away slightly to look in my eyes. I nodded to signify that he could continue. "Why do ya care so much?"

I just smiled like I always do and then placed my head on his shoulder once more. It took me a few seconds and then I finally got up enough strength. I tilted my head to the side and whispered in his ear, "Because I love you."

I could feel the muscles in his back tense up but I was thankful that he didn't stop dancing. I seemed to be shocked at myself for saying what I had just said and in a way wished I could take it back. But then there was the other part of me that didn't care what his response was as long as he knew how I really felt. That is until something happened that I never would have expected. He leaned closer to me and I heard his voice say, "I love you to."

I couldn't help myself as I pulled away and stared at his face trying to figure out whether this was some kind of joke. "Really?" I asked, my voice quivering.

This time it was his turn to smile as he nodded his head in conformation. I was so happy that tears brimmed my eyes. Spot just wiped them away with his thumbs and then leaned forward as he kissed me passionately on the lips. I smiled as we broke apart and Spot took my hand. "Now lets get outta here before the boys start ta get worried."

It was really dark outside as we finally started our journey back to the Lodging House. I was slightly cold when the wind would blow but other than that the temperature was comfortable. Spot and I walked through the streets, with him leading. I never understood how he could possibly find his way in the daytime let alone at night.

We were walking for about a half an hour and were only a few street's away from the Lodging House when we started to hear footsteps behind us. At first we ignored them but then they grew louder. Spot gripped my hand tightly as we turned around to look. To my horror it was four rather large boys carrying clubs in there hands. "Don't ya know better than ta be wonderin da streets at night?" The tallest boy said tauntingly.

"Get outta here, Peter, ya know better than ta come into Broolyn." Spot said as he let my hand go and stepped forward. But the boys didn't seem to take any heed of his threat.

The next thing I knew the boy named Peter punched Spot hard in the face. I screamed and jumped forward but without realizing it a boy had come out of a near by alley and grabbed me from behind. He pulled my arms behind my back and wouldn't let me go. I watched as Spot got to his feet and punched Peter in the stomach. When he doubled over from loss of air Spot kneed him in the face.

Just then the kid behind me started to kiss me on my neck. I found myself lashing out and ended up kicking my leg backwards into his knee. He let me go and then backhanded me hard across the face, sending me crashing into the brick wall. I cried out as I fell down into the mud of the alley way. I looked over and was happy to see that Spot was surprisingly holding his own in the fight. But I knew that there were to many of them and he wouldn't survive much longer on his own.

I looked around the alley frantically and came upon a wooden plank, sitting by a trash can off to the left of where I was sitting. I made sure that no one was watching me and then crawled over to it. I picked up the piece of wood and got to my feet, walking quietly up behind them. I watched as Peter, who's nose was broken, was holding Spot while another boy walked closer to him with a club. Without thinking I smacked Peter hard in the back of his head and watched him fall to the ground.

Spot who was better able to think in these sort of situations got to his feet quickly and grabbed my hand. He pulled me along as we ran as fast as we could down the alley way. There were six boys chasing after us now and I knew that if they caught us we were dead. But I was thankful that Spot knew this neighborhood like he knew the palm of his hand and he took the quickest way to the docks.

It seemed like an eternity before we finally made it to the Lodging House. A few of the boys were sitting around outside keeping a watch and stood up as they saw us coming. I ran up onto the dock and Booker who was standing there caught me as I collapsed into his arms from exhaustion. My nose wasn't broken but it was bleeding profusely and my shoulder was throbbing from where I smacked into the wall.

I looked over and the six boys from Queens came running out of a street and stopped short when they saw all of the Brooklyn Newsies standing around us. "You got away dis time Conlon, but next time ya wont be so lucky!" Peter yelled venomously. But then ran as a few Brooklyn boys jumped off the dock and went after them.

Booker bent down beside me, "Are you alright?"

I nodded my head, "Yes, I'm alright." I said to Booker, who looked morally worried about my well-being. But then I saw Spot who look down at me concerned. He walked over and lifted me to my feet.

"Are ya sure?" he asked seriously as he stared into my eyes with both hands on my shoulders. I knew that Spot could tell when I was lying and he nodded his head when he saw that I wasn't. "Come on then, let's get inside and clean you up."

I walked with Spot into the Lodging House and then I walked up the stairs into his room. I stumbled over and laid down on his bed as I tried to steady my breathing. A few minutes later Spot walked in with a bucket of water and a rag. I sat up as he knelt down in front of me. He dipped the rag in the water and gently began to clean the dirt and blood off my face. We didn't take our eyes off of each other until he was finished.

Spot placed the rag back into the bucket and then looked back at me. His expression turned to worry when he saw that I was crying. "What's wrong?" he asked urgently.

"I…I was so afraid that something was going to happen to you," I cried as Spot sat next to me on the bed and held me close to his chest. I sobbed into his shirt as I tried to get a hold of myself.

Once the tears slowed down Spot put his hand underneath my chin and lifted my face up to see his. "Nothing is gunna happen ta me." He said firmly and I wished I could have believed him.

I just nodded my head as he leaned in and kissed me on the lips. I wrapped my arms around his neck and ran my fingers through his hair. Spot pulled me closer to him, in order to deepen the kiss and I all to willingly obliged. Somehow I knew that this kiss was different than any one that we had ever shared. Because it was filled with love and passion.

I felt his hands begin to roam like they had the last time we had gone this far but this time I didn't make him stop. I was incredibly terrified of everything that had happened that day and he was the only one who could make the pain disappear. I wanted him more than I had wanted anything in my life.

Suddenly I felt him stop and he pulled away gently, looking deeply into my eyes as if asking for permission. I thought about it for a second and then nodded my head. I didn't know if I was ready and I think I didn't care. All I wanted was to be in his arms for the rest of my life. I watched him as he stood up and walked over to the door. He shut it quietly and I knew the moment I heard the lock click that when I woke up the next morning, everything would be different.

****

Thank you:

C.M. Higgins- Thank you so much! I am going to start working on the next part of our story today. I am so happy that you liked the last chapter. I can't tell you what is going to happen, although I may give you a few hints. I always love having your reviews and you are like the most constant reviewer that I have. Thank you so much! I will talk to you later.

Spunkz-Hey! I always love your reviews, they make me so happy! Yeah I love making Spot have like two different personalities, its fun. I also liked the part in the last chapter where he threw the queen's kid into the river. I just thought it was funny. I'm glad you like how I write a lot of stuff about what my character is thinking. It's because I also like to read stories where the character seems real and not so fake. Well this was a fun chapter to write and I hope you think its good. Please let me know what you think.

Splashey- Hey! I'm happy that you liked the last chapter. Just to give you a hint… you were correct about Booker and Hanna becoming closer. Because something happens in the next chapter that causes some problems. But that's all I can tell you, lol I don't want to ruin it. Anyway, I really liked writing this chapter, I hope you liked reading it. Let me know what you think.

Dimonah Tralon- I'm glad you liked the filler chapters also. They are a really important part of my story. But this has to be my favorite chapter that I wrote. I really enjoyed writing it, so I hoped you enjoyed reading it. Thanks for always reviewing.

Swimade333- Hey! I'm very happy that you liked the last chapter. To me, the filler chapters are just as important because they tend to give information into my character. To make her seem more like a real person. I hope that you enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think.

clover- Thank you so much! I am glad you liked the last chapter, I personally thought it was boring. But that's probably because I am the one writing it. Besides the readers are more important. Don't worry, Race appears in the next chapter. He will be coming back into the story. I just had to focus on Spot and Hanna's relationship first. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. It is my favorite one so far. Let me know what you think!

The Good Girl- Thank you so much! I am glad that you love my story. I hope you liked the rest of my story and continued reading. It always makes me happy when I get new readers. It makes me want to write more.

Koodles4You- Hey! I am so happy that you continued reading. Its alright that it took you a little to get finished reading, I mean it's a long story. Don't worry, I will be throwing in some big twists, actually next chapter is one of them. But I still only have thirty chapters, everything is already planned out. I wish I could make it more, but I can't. That would just be dragging my story line out. Anyway. I am so happy that you love my story, it means a lot to me. Well I hope you liked this chapter, tell me what you thought of it.

Luv ya all,

BlackWiltedRose


	23. Giving Up

Hey everyone!!! Here is chapter twenty-two. I am warning you this was very sad for me to write. You will find out why at the end of the chapter. Please don't hate me, its part of the story. I had to. Well thank you so much for all of your reviews. I really appreciate it. I know its not as good as the last chapter, but I still think I did an ok job. Thanks again.

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

Chapter Twenty-Two

I woke up early the next day as the sun shone brightly in my eyes. I groaned and rolled over, smiled at Spot as he slept quietly beside me. For a few minutes I just laid there, watching as his chest moved up and down when he breathed and the funny way his hair fell into his face because the front pieces were to long. I reached out and brushed it back as I let my hand linger on his cheek for a moment. I sighed when I rolled over in bed and pulled the covers off of me. I got to my feet and stretched out my arms. I yawned loudly as I walked over to the dresser and pulled out a white skirt and a deep blue blouse. When I looked in the mirror I was shocked at the shimmer in my eyes and the bright smile that graced my face.

I finished fixing my hair and turned around quickly when I heard movement from the bed behind me. Spot was no longer asleep and sat smirking at me with his back pressed up against the wall. I felt myself blush as I pushed a stray strand of hair behind my right ear. I felt an awkward feeling rising inside my stomach as we stared at each other. _What had I done…_

I knew that there was not a single ounce of regret inside me about what had happened the night before. But if so then why did I feel so guilty? I don't think either of us meant for anything like that to happen. We were both just intensely emotional last night and one thing lead to another.

I knew that Spot could tell that I was upset about something when I broke eye contact with him and went to look for a pair of earrings. I could hear him get up off the bed and pull on his trousers. When I turned back around he was almost fully dressed except for his shirt. He walked over and wrapped his arms around my waist. In return I rested my head on his shoulders and hugged him tightly. We stood there in each others arms for what seemed like hours before we finally pulled apart.

Spot pushed my hair back and then cradled my face in his hands. "What's wrong?" he asked.

I smiled weakly and shrugged my shoulders. "Nothings wrong…" I replied but Spot raised his eyebrows as if telling me not to lie. I pulled my face away from his and turned around. I began pacing the room for a few minutes before I looked back at him. "I don't know…I…I just have this strange feeling of guilt. Like I let somebody down, like I let myself down."

Spot smiled at me understandingly before holding my hands in his own. His intensely blue eyes bore holes into me as we made eye contact once more. Yet somehow I saw something different shining in his eyes today. They didn't look so cold anymore or so harsh, they were warm and there was a fire burning inside them. "It's alright," he said sincerely.

Just having him say that seemed to make every bad feeling that I had, wash away. Spot was right, everything would be ok. I just had to relax because there was nothing I could do to change the past. Things happen that you don't plan for but all you can do is except them and move on.

I kissed him softly on the lips. "I know," I said as he pulled on his shirt and we opened the bedroom door. I walked out onto the stairs but then stopped when I looked over the railing into the congregation room. Jack was standing there staring up at us, but beside him stood Racetrack. He looked at me strangely for a few moments before I turned away quickly. Spot knew what had happened between us and squeezed my hand reassuringly. It had been ten days since I had last saw Race and I wouldn't admit it, but I had missed him dearly. He was the closest friend that I ever had, except for Spot. Yet what I felt for the both of them was two completely different feelings.

I was about to turn around and walk back in the bedroom but Spot wouldn't let me. He took my hand and pulled me down the stairs behind him. When we reached the bottom he ushered me over and stood in front of the two Manhattan Newsies. Even though I was scared to face Racetrack, there was still an unusual glow radiating around me that day. Only two of us knew what it was from, but the rest were clueless to my abnormally cheerful misdemeanor.

Spot and Jack spit shook in greeting and I reminded myself how nasty of a ritual that was. Especially if I was the one holding Spots hand most of the time. Jack turned and to my surprise he pulled me into a hug. I patted him on the back awkwardly, wondering why he was in such a good mood. "Hey Doll," he said.

"Hi Jack," I replied more enthusiastically than I had expected.

"Well don't you look happy taday," He said. I blushed when I realized that I had been smiling brightly the entire time. Well that is, after I had gotten over the shock of seeing Racetrack.

"That's because I am," I replied enthusiastically, trying not to look at Race. Because he always seemed to have the same skill as Spot, to tell what I was thinking.

"And why exactly are ya so happy?" Jack asked with a smirk on his face.

I just shrugged my shoulder, "No reason."  
He raised an eyebrow questioningly at me and I just smiled. Eventually he gave up because he knew he wasn't going to get the real answer out of me any time soon. Then Jack turned to Spot, "Well we got's business ta take care of. Would ya two be alright alone togetha?" He asked turning to Racetrack and I. We looked at each other for a few moments and then nodded our heads.

I grinded my teeth together vigorously as I watched Jack depart. Knowing that he had probably planned it this way. I began to grow nervous as I saw Spot walk into his room and shut the door behind him. I wished he wouldn't have left my side. It would have been a lot easier for me to face Racetrack if I wasn't alone.

Finally I got up my strength and turned around to see my old friend staring at me. He didn't seem angry but he didn't seem pleased to be there either. After glaring at each other for a few moments his face finally softened when he saw how nervous I was. "Do ya actually wanna talk or do ya wan't me ta just leave ya alone?" Race asked.

I looked up at him a little surprised and then finally spoke. "Of course I don't want you to just leave," I said softly.

He nodded and then we walked over and sat down at a table against the far right wall. All of the Brooklyn boys had already left, long before Spot and I had even awoken that morning. So we would have some time to talk alone before anyone started returning. There was a few moments of uncomfortable silence before Racetrack finally spoke. "So you and Spot are…" He didn't even need to finish.

"Yes…" I replied softly.

Race just sighed and nodded his head. I knew that he probably didn't agree but he knew that there was nothing he could do to change it. "How long?"

"The day before you and I got into that fight," I replied cautiously, not wanting to bring up any unwanted memories.

Then Racetrack turned to look at me. "Why didn't ya just tell me in da first place?"

"I was going to but I never got the chance," Race's face changed when he remembered how he had acted back at the Lodging House.

"I never meant ta yell at you like dat," He said sincerely, "It's just dat ya never came home and we were all real worried dat something had happened to ya. Den when ya wouldn't tell me where ya had been."

"I couldn't Racetrack, not when you were so angry like that." I replied quickly defending myself.

He just nodded his head, "I know." Race took my hands. "Ya do realize dat we didn't actually want ya ta leave."

I smiled at him, just thankful that we were not fighting anymore. "Yes, I know. But I think that leaving was the best thing for me."

Race looked at me confused. "Why would leaving be what was best."

I looked down at my hands which were now sitting folded in my lap. "Because one bad thing after another just kept piling on top of me. I had to get away. I was destroying myself."

"And ya think dat da best thing for ya ta do was ta run away wit Spot Conlon?" Race asked his voice raising in volume.

This made me angry and I stood up quickly in my chair and glared at him. "Spot Conlon is the best thing that ever happened to me!"

Race looked at me disbelievingly as he got to his feet at well. "Ha! I don't tink were talkin about da same kid here!"

"Yes we are!" I yelled at him but then calmed down. "Can't you see Race? He makes me a better person and for the first time in my life I feel like there is actually something worth living for. I'm really happy with him Race…and I just wish that you would be happy for me." This seemed to get through to him or maybe it was the tears that were gleaming on my cheeks. But Race walked over and put his hand on my shoulder.

"I am happy for you," I could tell he was lying but it made me feel better just to hear him say it.

Race was like a brother to me. He had helped me through so many problems in my life and took me in when I had nowhere else to go. I looked up to him and respected him as a person. So his opinion meant the world to me. I missed having him around, keeping me sane and lecturing me when I did something stupid. I knew that he had good reasons to object to my relationship with Spot. He had saw how Spot treated his ex-girlfriends and he didn't want that to happen to me. But I also trusted my own judgment and I knew that Spot had changed for the better

"Ya really are happy aren't you?" Race asked as he looked at my face. I smiled weakly and nodded my head. " Then let's stop fighting then alright?"

"Alright," I said as I pulled him into a hug. I heard the upstairs door open and I looked up. Jack and Spot were standing there smirking.

"Well I'm glad ta see dat dis whole thing is over wit." Jack said laughing.

Race and I laughed also as we pulled apart. Jack and Spot came down the stairs and stood beside us. My face seemed to glow as Spot and I stared at each other. He reached over and wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to his side. Race gave him a stern glare and he laughed. "Don't worry Race. Jack already gave me da big brotha speech. I know…If I hurt er' you'll kill me." This made me turn and glare at Jack.

He just shrugged his shoulders and smirked. "Well its da truth."

We all walked over and sat down at a round table by the window. "So Doll, der's something dat we need ta discuss wit you." Jack said. I looked around at them curiously.

"What?"

Spot fidgeted in his seat and then turned t o me. "Ya know how dis whole thing wit Queens is goin on right? After da fight we got into yesterday, it got me thinkin."

I furrowed my brow and looked at him intently. "What are you talking about Spot?" The way he was avoiding eye contact made me realize that it was something important.

"It's becoming dangerous for you ta be here and we think it would be best if ya went back ta Manhattan for a little bit. Just until dis whole thing gets worked out. I can't have ya gettin hurt." Spot said and for the first time he looked up from the table.

"I'm not going," I said flatly.

"It's not under debate Doll, ya gotta go." He said as frustration flashed in his icy gaze. I shook my head vigorously.

"No," was all I said.

"Don't ya understand. Dey can use ya ta get ta me. They won't hesitate ta hurt you. Dey made it pretty clear of that yesterday." Spot said angrily. I knew his hostility wasn't aimed towards me but fighting with him wasn't helping.

I got to my feet promptly and scowled down at him. "Well if I'm willing ta take that sort of risk, then so should you. I'm not leaving, ya need me here whether ya wanna admit it or not."

"But Doll…" Jack went to speak but I put up a hand to stop him.

"I made my decision."

Spot threw his hands in the air and then sighed. "Fine, but your not to go wondering around alone anymore." I smiled and nodded my head as I flopped back down in my seat. He looked over at me, "Your infuriating do ya know dat?"

"Of course," I replied happily as I pulled out a deck of cards. "Now who wants ta lend me some money."

The boys and I played two rounds of poker before they finally had to leave in order to make it back to Manhattan before the sun set. The Brooklyn boys returned not long after and the congregation room was filled to capacity. I decided to sneak into a corner against the far wall and read 'A Tale of Two Cities,' which my mother had given to me on my 11th birthday.

Soon it was time to go sell the evening addition and the Lodging House was once again silent. Spot informed me that he would be gone for a little bit and not to worry.

"Your leaving?" I asked concerned.

"Don't worry, Booker didn't go selling tonight so ya won't be alone." Spot replied kissing me on the cheek. I smiled and kissed him on the lips one more time before he left.

I was on chapter eleven when Booker came into the room. I wasn't paying attention until he walked over and sat down beside me. I looked up into his hazel eyes and smiled. "Hi," I said happily.

"Hi," he replied smiling down at me. It was the same smile that he gave me every time we spoke. But today there was a different look in his eyes and a strange tone to his voice. Which gave me the feeling that he wanted to tell me something.

I brought my feet down which had been propped up onto a chair and sat my book down on the table. When I turned back to look at Booker he was still staring at me with an admiring look on his face. "What?" I asked becoming slightly bashful under his intense gaze.

"There is something I need to tell ya," Booker said hesitantly. I could hear a tiny bit of urgency in his voice. He seemed to be slightly closer to me than was comfortable, as our knees were touching and I could feel the heat radiating off of his body. I wanted to move away, to give us space but something in his voice made me stop.

"What is it," I said quietly as his stare started to make me nervous and I looked at the ground.

"I'm in love with you," Booker replied. I didn't realize what he said at first and before I could tell what was happening his lips were pressed up against my own.

My eyes were wide with shock as I put my hands up to his chest to get ready to push him away. But no more than seconds later I heard the familiar bang of the Lodging House door and without looking up I knew who it had been. But that didn't stop the shock when I pushed Booker away and looked at him standing in the doorway.

"I…I can't believe dis!" Spot yelled, with an expression of hurt and shock on his face.

I stood up quickly and my chair went crashing to the floor. "SPOT," I said reaching out for him but he shoved passed me. I stumbled backwards a little before I went chasing after him. But he was quicker and made it up the stairs and into his room, slamming the door hard in my face. I quickly turned the door knob before he had a chance to lock it and pushed my way inside.

Spot was standing across the room looking out the window, with his back turned in my direction. I watched as he clenched his fists together and I just stood there waiting for him to speak. "Spot…" I whispered quietly, afraid that any movement would cause everything to come crashing down around me.

It took a few minutes before he finally began to speak. "How could ya do this?" he asked. His voice cracked slightly and I could almost feel the pain that came from those words.

"I didn't…" I stuttered. It was all that I could say. I didn't know the words to use to show him that it wasn't my fault. I had no idea how Booker felt or at least how serious he was about the things that he said. I didn't ask him to love me or to kiss me like he had. All I wanted was his friendship and he wanted something more.

"Did last night mean nothing to you?" Spot asked as he turned around and stared at me. I didn't know what to say, I just stared at him speechless with tears running down my face. "DID IT MEAN NOTHING TO YOU!" He screamed and I cringed as he knocked a few things off his desk in aggravation.

"It meant everything to me," I whispered between sobs. But he was to infuriated to hear me.

"How could ya do this?" He asked again, shaking his head. I had never seen Spot so broken in my life. The pain and anger that I saw in his eyes shattered my heart into a thousand pieces. But it also frightened me very deeply. I loved him so much and it had taken me so long to make him love me in return. Now everything was ruined because of Booker.

"I love you," I said reaching for him but he shoved me away forcefully.

"I bet ya say dat ta every guy ya kiss, right?" The venom in his voice made me cry even harder.

"It wasn't my fault," I said defensively.

"Of course it wasn't," He yelled as he began pacing around the room.

"Would you just listen to me," I begged helplessly watching as our relationship fell apart before my eyes. If he would just stop and listen he would understand that it wasn't my fault.

"I'm tired of listenin to ya!" He yelled. "Ya know what, I don't even know what I saw in you in da foist place."

"Please…" I grabbed his hand but he shoved me back again and I fell to the floor. "You don't mean this." I sobbed.

"Yes I do! Your nothin but a pathetic, manipulative, whore and I don't want to ever see ya face aroun' here again!" Spot yelled as he threw my clothes at me.

I could never explain to you the pain that I felt at that moment. It was like a thousand daggers stabbing me in the chest. I knew that even if it wasn't my fault, I had lost Spots trust and that was something that you could never get back again.

I was blinded by my tears as I got to my feet and turned around. I didn't care about my belongings or anything else. I just opened the door and stumbled outside onto the stairs. I walked down them slowly and when I looked up, Booker was standing there staring at me. I couldn't bare to look at him and I turned around and walked down the hallway. At the far end of the hallway there was an empty room, much like a closet where most of the cleaning things were stored. It was the only other room besides Spot's that had a lock on it. Booker came after me but I slammed the door hard in his face as I collapsed onto the floor crying.

I think I was in more pain at that moment than I had been even when my parents died. I didn't feel like I knew my parents all that well so when they died it wasn't like I lost something really important to me. But when you lose someone you truly love…that's a pain so intense that I would have rather died than had to go through it again.

I don't remember when I fell asleep that night but I woke up really early the next morning. I had overheard Jack telling Spot the other day, that he would stop by in the morning. I knew he was someone who always kept his word and I caught Jack before he left to go back to Manhattan.

"Doll, what happened?" He asked surprised at my rugged and pathetic appearance.

"Please take me back to Manhattan." I begged him while trying to avoid the question.

"Why? Did Spot do something to you?" Jack asked angrily. I shook my head and looked down at the floor, then back up into his eyes.

"Something happened last night and we had a fight," Jack looked at me understandingly. He knew how bad Spot's temper could get. "I will tell you about it on the way." I said hopefully.

Jack stared at me for a few moments, deciding on whether or not it was a good idea and then sighed heavily. "Oh alright, lets go. I wanna get back before the circulation bell rings." He put his hand on my back and lead me out the door.

Before I stepped off the dock I looked back at the old Lodging House. I felt like the hole in my heart was just growing larger as I realized I wasn't just loosing someone I loved but I was losing my home. Because I not only cared about Spot, I cared about every single boy in that building, like they were my family. Sometimes they drove me insane and it took awhile to get them to trust me. But I had watched how they had changed over the past week and grown to accept me. It was the hardest thing I had ever done as I turned my back on the things I loved so dearly but I didn't have the strength to fight Spot anymore. He would be happier without me there to cause him pain. So I walked away with a heavy heart and never looked back again. Maybe I was giving up but hanging on was hurting me even more.

Thank you:

C.M. Higgins- Wow, I made you speechless with the last chapter. Thank you so much for all your encouragement and nice comments. That really makes me want to keep writing. I am so sorry that I haven't worked on our story for awhile. I will make sure to get that chapter done today if I can, so that its finished before I leave and you can work on it while I'm gone.

Iaintgotaname-Thank you so much for you review. You really made my day. I am so happy that you liked the last chapter. It was so much fun to write. I know this chapter was upsetting at the end. I hated writing it, but I had to. I hope you still like it and let me know what you think.

Spunkz- Hey, thanks so much. Yeah I always love making Spot have like two different characteristics. He is nice and then a second later he can be evil. Its so much fun! But sorry for the depressing ending to this chapter. I hope you still enjoyed it even though its sad. I know it will probably upset most of my reviewers. Oh and I am glad you are alright and the hurricane didn't hit you. Well I hope to hear from you again.

Splashey- Wow you're the second person I left speechless with the last chapter. I know you probably didn't like this chapter as much because it wasn't very happy. But its part of the story. I am really glad that you liked the last chapter, it was my favorite one to write. I am so happy that you are still reading my story after all this time. Thanks so much!

Dimonah Tralon- Thanks, I am glad you liked the last chapter, I really loved writing it. I know this chapter wasn't as good but I hoped you liked it, even though it was kinda depressing at the end. I didn't want to write it, but its part of the story.

Swimade333-That comment you made in your last review, about me putting so much love and passion into my story, was the nicest comment I ever got. I was so happy after I read that. Because I try to when I write, some people never notice that. I know this chapter was depressing. Please don't hate me for it. I hope to hear from you again.

Clover- Thanks so much! I am really happy that you liked the last chapter. I was happy because I got to bring Race back in this chapter. Although it was really hard for me to write the ending. But I had to. You will see a lot more of Race in the next few chapters. I hope you are not to upset with how I ended this. Well let me know what you think.

NadaZimri- Hey, yeah I really loved writing the last chapter. I didn't enjoy writing this one as much because of the ending. But its part of the plot. I hope you liked it and I always love getting your reviews they make my day. Thanks again.

Joker is Poker with a J- Hey, yeah I hate when the computer does that and it wont let you review. It always happens to me. Thank you so much, I am really glad that you liked the last chapters. I hope you liked this one, I know it wasn't as good as the last one.

Koodles4You- I know you probably hate me for this chapter…but I had to write it. I didn't want to I swear. Well your review was the nicest one I have got in a long time. You are always so nice. I really appreciate it a lot. You really make me love writing. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, even though you probably hate me for the end. I hope that you will still review.

The Good Girl- Thank you so much! I always love when I get reviews like yours. They make me want to continue writing. I am really happy that you loved the last chapter, I did too. Umm, to answer your question. Spot and Doll have only been going out for ten days. But they have known each other for exactly a month. I know it's a short time, but I figured it was ok. Lol I mean its just a story. Now I know this chapter probably upset you at the end. But like I told everyone else, It is part of the story line I had to write it. Well let me know what you think. Thanks for you review, again!

Luv ya all,

BlackWiltedRose


	24. Deteriorating

Hey!! Sorry this chapter took so long to put up. I was on vacation at the beach. I didn't get home till this morning. Anyway. This is once again another filler chapter. I hope that you like it. It's less depressing than the other ones. Please remember to read and review. Thanks.

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Jack was silent on our walk back to Manhattan, after I had finished pouring my heart out to him. The story had taken longer to tell than I had anticipated and by the time I had finished we were almost to the Lodging House. Jack and myself had never been close with one another, there had always been something standing between us. But I would have trusted him with my life and I knew he would do the same. So like a brother he walked beside me and listened as I explained my reason for leaving Brooklyn.

I could hardly speak between the sobs after I had finally finished talking and Jack grabbed my arm to stop me before we walked into the Lodging House. "Are you alright?" he asked.

I lifted my teary gaze up from the ground and stared at him. "No," I whispered sadly as I turned around and opened the door. I hated crying, but there was nothing else to do to make the pain go away.

I stepped over the threshold and Kloppman looked up at me from behind his desk. There were a few of the younger newsies sitting around and they stared at me curiously, wondering why I had decided to return. Jack went up to the front desk and sat some money down on the counter. "It's er' rent for dis week," he said and Kloppman nodded.

"You don't need to do that Jack," I said softly but he just smiled.

"Don' worry about it Doll, just go get some rest." Even though it was in the middle of the afternoon Jack could tell by my behavior that I hadn't gotten much sleep the night before, nor would I be able to that day. But I needed to be alone, to sort out everything in my mind.

I nodded to Jack and began my walk up that familiar wooden staircase, leading into the bunk room. I could hear the quiet thump of many feet and the joyous laughter coming through the floorboards from the room above. But the moment I opened the door everything got quiet.

I knew in my mind that I must have looked horrible but it was nothing compared to how I felt. I refused to stare into anybody's eyes, not wanting to see the looks that they were giving me. I felt Jack's hand on my back as he gently guided me into the room because I had temporarily stopped at the top of the stairs.

Racetrack was sitting on his bunk and looked at me worriedly as he got to his feet. "What's wrong?" he asked but I shook my head. I wasn't ready to talk about it. I knew that Jack would tell them the moment I was out of ear shot and I didn't care. My eyes were red and sore from crying and I felt like I was about to pass out. I just walked passed all of the boys and into my old room.

I didn't even care about closing the door, I just laid down on the bed and pulled the covers up over my head. I knew the boys were staring at me sympathetically but I didn't care. I laid there for hours and sobbed into my pillow. I just kept running everything that had happened over and over in my mind, crying harder each time Spot's face appeared in my head. Eventually Race walked over and shut the door quietly, giving me my privacy.

I did end up falling asleep that night but the coming morning would bring no solace to my agony. Days went by as I sunk deeper and deeper into a dark and dangerous depression. I refused to step foot out of my room, only to use the bathroom and when I did, I spoke not a single word to anyone. I got very little sleep and didn't eat for days. I could feel myself painfully deteriorating and I could do nothing to stop it.

One time I looked at my reflection by accident when I stood up off my bed and after that I turned the mirror in my bedroom to face the wall. I looked like I was barely alive. My skin was abnormally pale and it clung to my bones in a grotesque sort of way. My hair was frizzy and dry as it fell in scraggily curls around my thin face. My green eyes were red and puffy, surrounded by deep black circles of exhaustion. I stood there for a few minutes just staring at myself, wondering how my life had come to this. What had I done to deserve such a slow and pitiful existence?

I stayed locked in my room for ten days straight and only caught the glimpse of sunlight through the curtains of my window. But even getting up out of bed was becoming more difficult as time went on. My leg muscles would tense up from lack of water and crying every day didn't help much. I wasn't just crying for Spot, I was crying for my parents, for my life and for the friends I no longer had. I knew that the newsies got more and more worried about me, I could hear them talking about me through the floor boards at night. They left me alone because they knew that this was something I would have to deal with by myself. But they were not surprised by my actions one bit, for they had seen things like this happen before. Living with poor orphans and children who had past's far worse than my own, depression was something that they saw everyday.

But soon they realized that I wasn't getting any better, so they decided to take action because they refused to let me give up on living altogether. It was early in the morning on the eleventh day and I was laying on my bed, staring up at the ceiling. My room was a mess as my clothes laid sprawled around on the floor and dust sat on my dresser top. I sometimes woke up early these days to listen to the commotion coming from the bunk room. Thinking about what the boys would do that day and wondering how many papers they would sell. Sometimes I wanted to go out there, to see there faces again. Not just to hear there voices through a wooden door. But I was to weak to move and I had been getting horrible pains in my stomach.

Yet I heard a loud thumping noise coming from the right side of my room. It continued when I finally realized that someone was trying to get into my window. When the window finally opened I watched as a boy climbed through and toppled on the floor. He quickly stood up and dusted himself off. That was when I realized it was Racetrack.

I propped myself up onto my elbows and looked at him wearily. "Why did you climb through my window?" I asked, my voice scratchy from not being used in days.

His eyes were wide when he stared at me and I knew it was because of my appearance. I felt slightly embarrassed but was to tired to care. When he finally got over the shock of seeing me so broken, he walked over and pulled up a chair to sit beside my bed. "Because ya won't open da door."

I got a really horrible pain in my stomach and groaned as I laid back down on my pillow. It took a few minutes for the pain to go away before I turned to look at Race again. "Please, just leave." I asked softly.

"I'm not leaving until you leave," He said sternly and by the look in his eyes I knew that he meant it.

I sighed deeply, "Why are you doing this?"

"Because Spot isn't worth killing yourself!" Race practically yelled at me as he got to his feet and started pacing the room. I glared at him and sat up once more, propping my back against the brass headboard.

"Is that what you think? That I am doing all of this just because of him!" Race stared at me without an expressionless face. "Well its not just about Spot! Its about everything! I not only lost my parents a month ago Race, I lost my family, my friends…my life! Then Spot showed up and I lost you. He was the only thing I had…the only thing that made me happy. Then Booker appeared and now I lost everything." Surprisingly I didn't cry when I said this but the sincerity and pain was clear in my voice.  
Racetrack relaxed and sat down beside me once more. He took my hands in his own. "Ya never lost us Doll…ya lost yourself."

I looked at him clearly for a few moments, thinking about what he had said. Then I smiled for the first time in days and hugged him tightly. He was startled by how thin I was and didn't hug me tightly in return, afraid that I would break. When I pulled away I laughed a little. "How did you become so wise all of a sudden."

"I tink' dat ya startin to rub off on me." he said laughing. I smiled and then leaned back up against the headboard.

"I'm far from wise," I replied halfheartedly.

"Well your da smartest goil we eva knew," Race said seriously as he took out a cigar and placed it in his mouth. He knew not to smoke in front of me because I had yelled at him before about hating the smell.

"Ha!" I laughed, not taking one bit of it serious.

He just shook his head. "Its true. Ya know how ta read and ta write, den ya use all dos fancy words dat we aint neva heard of. Why do ya tink dat so many of da guys listen ta what ya gotta say?"

"They don't listen to me," I replied smirking. They never listened to me. They just thought that I was some annoying rich girl who likes to boss them around.

"Yes dey do," Race said seriously. "For example, Rememba dat day when ya yelled at Skittery because he kept loosing all his clothes and ya told him dat he might be able ta find dem if he didn't keep throwing dem aroun' everywhere. Well he's been doin what ya said and he hasn't lost his hat since. Oh an how ya told us dat we would start gettin sick from all da germs if we didn't start cleanin up da Lodgin' House a little. Well we did what ya said and you should see da bathroom now." Race said proudly informing me.

I smiled at him thankfully, "Really?" I asked laughing.

"Yeah, come on. Get up an come see it," He replied as he stood up and grabbed my hand. My eyes grew wide and I shook my head frantically.

"No, not right now Race," I said but he lifted me up out of the bed with ease. I was extremely weak and had no muscle to resist him.

I tried to stop him but he pulled me over to the door. Finally Race stopped when he noticed how frightened I was. "Don't worry Doll, nobody is out der. Dey are all out sellin." That relieved me slightly but I was still scared. I didn't know why I was still afraid to leave the room. Maybe because that meant that I was moving on and I didn't know if I was ready to leave my shelter. I knew that Racetrack was right and that I had to move on, to continue living. But I just couldn't understand how anything could go back to normal.

Yet I had to start somewhere. "Alright," I said softly.

Race smiled and unlocked my bedroom door. With a creak it opened and I shielded my eyes from the sunlight that was cascading through the many windows in the room. When my vision cleared I was shocked to see that he was right. The whole bunk area was cleaner than I had ever saw it before. There was still a little bit of clothes laying around but they were from the younger boys who didn't see the significance of cleaning up after themselves.

I had no socks on and my feet were freezing with each step I took on the hard wood floor. My legs were weak and I felt like an old woman as I walked slowly into the bathroom. Racetrack held me up and I smiled when I saw that all of the dirt was gone. The sinks were clean and everything was put away neatly. I was no longer afraid to touch the counters and Race walked me down to my sink at the end. I was shocked to see a bouquet of red roses sitting on the ledge under my mirror. I reached out gently and touched the roses with my fingers, Race just smiled brightly beside me.

"Der's thirty-two of dem, one from each of us." I looked up at him.

"What is it for?" I asked happily.

Race looked a little surprised but the smile never left his face. "It's ya birthday, rememba."

I looked from Racetrack to the Roses and back again, wide eyed. How could I have forgotten my own birthday? But the simple fact that the newsies had remembered was astonishing to me. I had treated them so horribly over the last month that I had known them and yet they still spent some of there own money on me. It was the nicest present I had ever received. Because I knew that every penny was significant to them and that one of those roses probably meant whether or not they had dinner that night. " I don't deserve these." I said sadly.

"Yes ya do," Race replied patting me on the back. "Now why don't ya clean up a little and den play me in a game of cards."

"I don't have any money," I replied.

Race just laughed as he handed me a clean wash cloth. "It doesn't have ta be for money. Just a normal game," I looked at him surprised. Racetrack was never one to just _play_ a normal game of cards. Something always had to be up for him to win.

"What's the catch?" I asked smirking at him.

He just smiled mischievously and walked out of the room. "You'll see," he said laughing.

It took me longer than usual to get myself cleaned up. Still refusing to use the metal bin that they called a bathtub, I decided to wash my hair in the sink. I ran my fingers through the tangle of wet curls and then tied it back with a blue ribbon. After I finished washing my face I walked back into the bedroom and changed into a simple white cotton dress with a matching blue ribbon around my waist. I decided to risk turning my mirror around and when I looked at my reflection I wasn't nearly satisfied with what I saw but it would have to do.

When I walked out of my room, Race was sitting on his bed, shuffling the cards in his hands as if it was second nature to him. He smiled brightly at me as I walked over and sat down beside him on the bed. Race dealt each of us our hand, but before we started I asked him, "So…what's the bet?"

He looked over the top of his cards at me with a smirk. "Well if ya win, ya can go back ta hiding in ya room and neva see da light of day again." I couldn't deny that it was something that I greatly wished to do. It was so much easier just to hide from all my fears instead of facing them. "But…if I win, ya have ta come ta Medda's party wit us next week."

I growled because I knew that he had me trapped. There was no way I could possibly get out. I was somewhat decent of a poker player and had beat many of the Brooklyn boys. But Racetrack was a different story. He was the one who taught me everything I know and never once had I succeeded in beating him. "That's not fair…" I yelled.

"Fine den, just quit." Race said.

"No," I replied. I had never quit anything in my life and he knew I was to stubborn to give up. The way he could guess my every move and action made me hate the fact that I was so open with my emotions all the time.

"Well den, lets play." I thought about it for a moment and then nodded my head as we preceded into the game.

An hour passed by and we were still playing. It was so quiet that I could hear a pin drop and I jumped when I heard the door open and Jack, Mush and Kid Blink walked in. It was the first time I had seen them in a week and a half. They stopped and stared at me like I was some kind of exotic animal. Finally Jack came to his senses. "Hey, look who finally decided to show er' face."

"Well I'd still be in there if Race hadn't drug me out," I said stubbornly.

"Wait a go Race," Mush said and I glared at him. But he just slouched up against the wall and laughed.

"Are ya feelin alright Dollface?" Blink asked staring at me closer. Noticing how pale and thin I was becoming.

"Yes…why?"

"Because ya look terrible," Blink said. I knew he didn't mean it as an insult but it still hurt me inside.

"She looks betta dan she did before." Race said as he picked up a card and put it in his hand.

"Alright! I get that I look horrible, now can we drop this conversation." I stated angrily and then cringed as a pain shot through my stomach. I saw the boys look at each other and then look back at me.

"Are ya sure you're alright?" Jack asked.

"I told you I'm fine," I said as my breathing returned to normal.

"Maybe ya should go see the doc," Mush suggested.

"Will you just stop it!" I yelled and then lowered my voice. I didn't want to yell at them, they were just trying to help me. "I'm alright, really. I have just been feeling a little sick lately, that's all. But I'm sure it's something I can handle."  
The boys didn't look so convinced. Mush walked closer to me and handed me a piece of bread. "Maybe ya should try eatin something."

I hadn't eaten in days and I felt my stomach growl when I looked at it. I felt guilty about taking his food but I couldn't resist. Yet the moment I took a bite out of it, I felt a wave of nausea wash over me. I laid my cards down quickly and ran to the bathroom. But there was nothing in my stomach so I didn't do anything but gag. My chest began to burn and another horrible pain shot up through my stomach. I knew I needed to eat something but how was I suppose to if I couldn't hold anything in.

I sat down on the bathroom floor in one of the stales until I finally felt better and made my way back into the bunk room. They looked up at me concerned and I put my hands up to stop them before they could ask any questions. "I'm fine!" I made my way over and took my seat on the bed next to Race once more, picking up my cards. "Now lets play." I wanted to get this finished before any more of the boys got back.

Of course I didn't have to wait very long because in a half an hour Racetrack beat me like I had expected him to. "Well it was a good game," He said and then laughed at the depressed look on my face.

After I helped clean up the cards, I informed them that I was going to go lay down. My head was killing me and I wasn't in the mood to deal with the rest of the newsies, not today. They understood and to my surprise they hugged me before I turned around and walked back into my room.

For weeks I had been dreading coming out of my room because I was afraid of what they would say. Of how the boys would judge me after knowing what had happened. Yet with the help of my friends, I was slowly coming back to reality. But I knew in my heart that it would be a long hard journey before there was finally an end to all my suffering.

Thank you:

C.M. Higgins- Hey! Finally I returned from vacation. I missed talking to you and going on I hate being away from the computer for that long. But I was at the beach so I didn't really care all that much. Thanks so much for all of the wonderful comments you say about my story. You have stuck with my story for so long. I am so happy that you liked the chapter and didn't hate me to much. Lol Well I will say something about the guess you made in you last review about Doll. Umm, it could be possible but I don't want to tell you anything just yet. Because I am not entirely sure about that at the moment. When I figure out anything else I will talk to you, of course. Thanks so much… again.

Spunkz- Yeah I did feel really bad for Spot when I wrote this chapter. It took me so long because I hated writing it. I am glad that you enjoyed it and I hope you enjoyed this one, even though it was a filler. I was on vacation the entire week and didn't have much time to write. But I didn't want to keep you guys waiting.

Splashey- Hey! Wow you're the first person ever to actually feel sorry for Booker in this whole thing. I mean you actually are suppose to. I didn't want people to hate his character. But I guess most people love Spot better, of course. I am so happy that you like the last chapter. I know I say that every time but its true. I actually think you are the longest lasting reviewer that I have. You and one other person. So thanks so much and I hope you continue reading.

Dimonah Tralon- Hey, thank you. I am happy that you think the chapter was well written. This one isn't the greatest because it's a filler chapter. But I was on vacation all week and didn't have time to write. I hope to hear from you soon. Thanks again.

Swimade333- Hey!!! Sorry I didn't update on Friday. I was actually on vacation at the Ocean. But I got it up today, its one day late. This chapter is a filler, but I have to have those in the story. I am so, so happy about your reviews. They always make me feel better because you say such nice things. Everyone says I'm a great writer, but I don't see it. So that's why I get so happy over your reviews. Because you are always so sweet. Thanks a bunch and I am glad you liked the last chapter.

Clover- Hey! Thanks! Your reviews are so nice! Yeah I was happy to make Doll and Race stop fighting since he is one of my favorite characters. That was exactly the reason I made them stop fighting. So that she would be able to go back to Manhattan after the whole Booker situation. Well I am so happy that you like the chapter. I hope you like this one also. Even though nothing super interesting happens.

Katherine- I am so happy that I have a new reviewer! I love when I find out more people are reading my story. Thank you so much for the compliment. I hope you keep reading.

Joker is Poker with a J- Thanks you so much! Your review was very nice. It made me so happy. Yeah that would be rather entertaining if Spot started singing. Lol That would be very funny to see. I love writing Angsty stuff. I don't know why. This story basically just writes itself. Lol its kinda funny actually. Well anyway. I am so happy that you liked the last chapter. I was afraid to many people would be upset about it. So, I hope you liked this chapter. It's another filler chapter, but I have to put these in to lead to the good stuff. Enjoy!

Koodles4You- Thank you so much! Like I said before your reviews always make me so happy. You never have anything bad to say about my story. Although I could hardly agree that my story is the best. But thank you so much for saying that! I really appreciate it. This chapter is just like a filler chapter. I have to have a lot of those. Lol I still hope you enjoy it.

The Good Girl- Hey! Of course I don't hate you and I know its not a flame. I understand what you mean about Doll seeming like she's a weak character. That's actually how I am trying to make it seem. I know its strange. But if you pay attention, in the beginning of the story she was strong, outgoing and arrogant. Then her parents died and everything fell apart. One bad thing after another keep's happening to her and she is like slowly deteriorating. She cries all the time because its becoming to much for her to handle. I mean her parents did just die a month ago. I would still be upset if I was her. It's like she is having a break down. She knew that fighting with Spot would only make things worse. That's why I didn't have her argue with him more. Hanna doesn't want to hurt him and that's what she feels like she is doing. So she thinks it would be best just to leave. That's why I have her cry all the time and stuff like that. Don't worry it won't last forever. Beut I just needed to show how much everything is effecting her. Well I hope you liked this chapter still. Its just a filler but I didn't have a lot of time to write it. I am glad you liked the twist in the last chapter. There are a lot of those in the story. I like to shake things up a bit. Well I hope to hear from you soon.

ocdchick- Hey! It's alright that you havn't reviewed before. I understand. I am just happy that you are reading it. Sorry I didn't mention you in the last chapter. I just was rushing when I answered my reviews. Anyway, yeah of course I had to make her forgive Race. He is one of my favorite characters in the story. I couldn't have her hating him for long. It just was to depressing. Well I hope I hear from you again and thanks so much!

eve maiden- Of course I don't think your some crazy reader. I am just happy to know that you like my story that much. I hate to say it, but I love when people cry. Because that means that I did a good job writing it. I am happy that you like it, sorry this chapter wasn't the best. It's just a filler chapter, I was on vacation all week. Let me know what you think.

Luv ya all,

BlackWiltedRose


	25. Reconciliation

Here is chapter Twenty-Four and the countdown to the end is beginning. We have Six chapters left to go. Which means six more weekends of updates. Thank you so much to all of my reviewers. I never would have continued this if it wasn't for you and your wonderful (and helpful) comments. Well keep reviewing and I hope to hear from you soon.

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

Chapter Twenty Four

Two days went by and I had begun casually coming out of my room every so often. Of course I knew that Racetrack wouldn't let me stay locked up forever, even if I wanted to. The boys had started to become more accustomed to having a girl around again and things had started to go back to how it used to be. I was happy to see that they didn't ignore me anymore and most of them would speak to me whenever we passed each other. I think it had to do with the conversation that Jack and Racetrack had with them one night, down in the room below me. When I listened closely, I could hear parts of it, but nothing came out clear.

As I sat alone in my room, I began to realize just how much I missed the company of my friends very dearly and that I was tired of secluding myself from the world. So with all my might, I tried to block out any thought of Spot Conlon and Brooklyn altogether. Sometimes it was harder than others and I would loose the cheerful misdemeanor that I had adopted over the last two days.

Today started out rather dull as I woke up with the commotion of the boys getting up to go selling. I tried to block it out because I had a late night talk with Race up on the roof and didn't get to sleep until a few hours before. We hadn't talked about anything important really, just small things. But he would always do his best to cheer me up when he felt like I was falling back into a depression. Somehow I always knew that no matter what happened I would always have Race there to help me and I would be forever grateful for his companionship over the short time that I had known them.

I stood up off the bed and yawned while stretching out my arms in the air. It didn't take me long to pull my curly blonde locks back with a ribbon and I slipped on a robe before walking out into the bunk room. Most of the boys were downstairs getting ready to leave but of course Racetrack was sitting on his bed waiting for me. Even with my door closed he knew that I always woke up at the same time as everyone else.

"Hey Race," I said walking over and sitting down on the bed. I propped my feet up on the one next to us and looked over at him with a smile.

"How ya feelin Dollface?" Race asked as he finished tying his boots and got to his feet.

"I'm feeling a little better," It wasn't entirely a lie because I was feeling better than I had been. But it wasn't completely the truth either. My stomach was hurting still and I got dizzy allot when I walked around but I was no longer nauseated and had begun eating every once in awhile.

"Dat's good, ya look allot better also." I smiled at him and stood up to go into the bathroom. "I gotta go sellin but don't go anywhere I gotta a surprise for you when I get back." Race said as he turned around and walked down the stairs.

I began wondering what this surprise could possibly be. The Newsies weren't exactly the best at keeping secrets. So if it was something big I would have heard about it by now. Since I didn't, it must have been something that was planned recently. Racetrack seemed rather excited about it, so I just smiled and went to clean up.

To my surprise Jack was still in the washroom wiping off his face. When I walked in, he looked up and grinned. "Glad ta see ya walkin around," he said as he washed the rag in the sink and then sat it down on the counter under his mirror.

"How come you are not out selling with everyone else. Your normally the first at the distribution center." I asked as I walked down to my sink.

"I decided ta take the day off and spend sum time wit Sara," I smiled, understanding how much his girlfriend meant to him.

I walked over and patted him on the shoulder. "You're a good guy Jack," I said, smiling weakly at him.

There was a small pause and then Jack made me look into his eyes. "Spot's a good guy too," he said and I looked away as hurt flashed in my expression.

"I know," I replied, sighing sorrowfully. Jack patted me on the back in return and then left the room. I stood there for a few seconds and then walked into the bunk room where I plopped down on Racetracks bed.

I liked the bunk room better than my own because there were more windows and the sun shown in brighter. My room felt like a prison to me now. I was still wore out and didn't realize I had fallen asleep until I felt someone shake my arm gently. I opened my eyes and saw Racetrack staring down at me with a grin on his face. "I wish I could come in everyday and find a beautiful goil in my bed." He said jokingly.

I sat up laughing. "I bet you do, Race." I threw his pillow at him playfully. "So how was selling today?"

"Da headline sucked! I only sold thirty papes." Race replied as he sat down at the foot of the bed. He just rested his back up against the headboard and smirked at me.

After a few minutes of a staring contest, I gave in. "What?" I asked.

"I gotta surpise for ya," Race said tauntingly.

"Oh really," I said, trying not to sound anxious. "What is is?"

Race just shook his head. "I'm not telling."

I got a pouting expression on my face. "Please?"

"Nope," he replied, propping his feet up on the bed beside me and crossing his arms across his chest.

I growled impatiently. "Just tell me."

"No…" He said laughing and I sighed. "I think I will just let er' tell ya herself."

I looked at Race confused and then I heard a few footsteps behind me. When I looked up, my mouth fell open. "OLIVIA!" I said shocked.

I couldn't believe she was there. After I stopped going to work for Medda, I was sure that I would never see her again. But here she was standing in front of me and I was completely speechless. "Hey, Hanna." Olivia said smiling. It was once again strange to me to hear someone calling me by my real name.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, still not completely over the shock of seeing her in the Lodging House.

"Racetrack came to the theater and he said that I could come and see you here." Olivia replied as she sat down on the bed facing the both of us. I looked down at Race and then back at her. She just laughed at my oblivious expression and then hugged me tightly. "Its so good to see you again."

When her arms were around me it finally snapped me out of my daze and I hugged her back. "I can't believe you are here. It's so good to see you again!"

Olivia pulled away from me and smiled. "I was so scared that something had happened to you, when you didn't show up to work that day. Then Race stopped by a little later and told us about what happened. I was so relieved." I looked over at Racetrack and he smiled cautiously, then shrugged his shoulders.

I was to excited to care about anything that had happened before, so I just ignored her last comment. "I'm alright," I replied happily.

"You have to tell me everything!" She said excitedly. I nodded my head and then looked over at Racetrack who just smiled.  
"Ok, but lets go up on the roof." I replied. "The rest of the boys should be returning soon."

Olivia nodded, her frizzy brown hair bobbing up and down. I smiled over at Racetrack and then led her into my bedroom. We climbed out the window and up the stairs onto the roof. It was around noon and the sun was shining brightly in the sky above. I could feel the heat radiating off of the black tar lining the building and rolled up the quarter length sleeves of my dress.

I walked over and sat down on the brick fireplace, remembering the last time I had been up here. It was around two weeks ago when Spot had first asked me out. I sighed deeply and then looked over at my friend. It was really strange to finally, once again, be in the company of a female. Especially since I had gotten so used to being completely surrounded by boys. "It's nice to talk to you again." I replied.

Olivia just smiled understandingly. "So…how come ya never told me about you and Spot? I don't know him personally but around here, everyone's heard his name."

I think she saw the hurt flash in my eyes as I quickly turned away to look at the ground. I really didn't really want to talk about it and the only person who truly knew my feelings was Jack…but that had been by mistake. Yet somehow I found myself wanting to confide in Olivia, to have somebody who isn't friends with Spot, comfort me. Don't get me wrong, I was sure that I could trust the newsies to listen when I talk. But boys are not the most sympathetic creatures on the planet. I know that they can see that I am hurting deeply, but in a way they just couldn't understand. "Well how much did Racetrack tell you?" I asked.

"Just dat ya ran off with Spot Conlon and would be stayin there for awhile." I just laughed. Leave it to Race to make it seem like Spot and I had eloped or something.

"It didn't exactly happen like that, you see…" and there I found myself delving into an intense recount of what had really happened.

I told Olivia everything, from the first day Spot and I met at Tibby's and how I thought he was an arrogant jerk. To how he showed up in my room and asked me out to dinner. The more I talked, the more I felt a huge weight being lifted off my shoulders. Olivia just sat there and listened intently, just smiling and nodded at the appropriate times. When I finally reached the end of my story, I knew that I was crying but I didn't stop until I was completely finished.

Olivia sat there in silence after the story came to and end. Then she reached over and pulled me into a hug. "I am so sorry!" She exclaimed.

I sniffed my nose and then nodded my head into her shoulder. Finally we pulled apart and she gave me a handkerchief to wipe the tears off my face. I took a deep breath and tried to get my composure back. "What am I going to do Olivia? I don't think I can take much more of this."

She just wrapped her arm around my shoulders and sighed. "There is nothing you can do. Ya just gotta wait and see how everything works out."

"I was afraid you were gunna say that." I replied.

We sat there for a few minutes without talking until we were distracted by the sound of someone climbing up the fire escape. I turned around and my mouth fell open. Standing at the edge of the roof, looking at me with deep brown eyes, was Booker.

"What are you doing here!" I practically yelled as I jumped to my feet.

"We need da talk," Booker replied.

My mouth opened a little bit more as Racetrack made his way up onto the roof. I looked over and glared at him. He put his hands up defensively. "Don' look at me! I didn' invite em'."

I turned back to Booker and glared at him. "I don't want to talk to you right now!"

He stepped forward urgently, "Please, just give me a chance."

I glared at him even more violently. "I said, I don't want to talk to you!"

I saw the hurt in Bookers eyes and I felt slightly guilty for the way I was treating him. But that still wasn't enough to take away the anger that was boiling up inside me. Racetrack sighed "Jus' give em' a chance ta talk."  
"Why should I!" I screamed.

Race raised an eyebrow. "Calm down Dollface, I'm not against ya here. But he did come all dis way and ya two need ta work dis out." I looked over at Olivia for recognition. She just nodded her head with a weak smile.

"Fine," I said shortly.

Racetrack motioned for Olivia and they both walked back down into the Lodging House and so I was once again left with Booker. We stood there in an uncomfortable silence for a few minutes before he finally spoke.

"How are you?" he asked politely. I just huffed and sat down on the fire escape.

"I have been better," I said staunchly. He nodded his head, knowing that he wasn't going to get any more of an answer out of me. I just couldn't understand how Booker could have done something so stupid. I sat there once more in silence before I finally broke.

"How could you have done that!" I yelled. "Why didn't you talk to me first? Why didn't you tell me how you felt?"

Booker lowered his head and shrugged his shoulders. Unlike Spot he was shy and more reserved when it came to confrontations. "I don't know. I guess I just wasn't thinking."

"Of course you weren't." I yelled, still venting my anger.

"I know what I did was stupid and I am extremely sorry for hurting Spot because he was a great friend." I cringed slightly at his name. "But I do not regret kissing you." Booker said sternly.

I looked up at him with harsh eyes. "Why?"

"Because I love you," Booker replied and I sighed.

"You don't even know what love is," I said sadly. "What I felt for my parents was love, what I felt for Spot was love…what you feel for me is just an attraction, nothing more."

Booker smiled weakly, "Maybe so, but I don't regret anything that I said to ya and I won't take it back."

"UGH! What is it that you see in me?" I asked exasperatedly. "I don't understand… how can think that I am worth loosing a friendship over?"

Booker just looked at me and smiled brightly for the first time since we had been together. "Because, your beautiful and smart. You always had a certain jubilant expression towards life that made everyone else around you feel joyful. I loved how you dreamed about your future and didn't need to fit in to feel excepted. You carried yourself differently than all the other girls I had ever know. You laugh when there's nothing funny and you don't just cry when your sad, you cry when your really happy as well. I love everything about you Doll and in my eyes, your worth the world."

When Booker finished speaking, I was at a loss for words. Never in my life had I ever heard anything so sweet. But the most amazing part about it was that he truly meant every word that he spoke. Just then the guilt came rushing back to me and I felt horrible for ever doubting how much he cared for me. Booker was the first person in my life to ever give me such immensely gratifying compliments. I was so use to being ridiculed about everything and told that I needed to improve, even when I was at my best. So to have Booker tell me that I was beautiful when I looked my worst was rather unnerving.

I looked up at him and smiled. "Thank you," I said softly. "That was the kindest thing that anyone has ever said to me."

"Really?" Booker asked surprised.

Suddenly I remembered dinner by the river and my heart sunk. "Yes, except for when Spo…" I stopped short, feeling rather awkward about the way the conversation was going.

We fell into a short silence and then Booker spoke. "You really love him, don't you?"

I looked up, startled at his sudden bluntness. But then I relaxed, knowing in my heart that I shouldn't lie and just to tell him the truth. "Yes, I love Spot very much." Saying this brought tears to my eyes.

Booker placed his hand on my shoulder comfortingly. "I really am sorry that I hurt you."

I nodded my head and wiped the tears away. "I know," I replied. After I finally got my composure back I looked up at him. "Now that we are on the topic of Spot. How is everything going back in Brooklyn?" I asked curiously. Hoping that it wouldn't be as bad as I thought.

"Things are a little rough. Spot hasn't spoke to me since. I don't know whether to be happy about that or worried. But he has been taking his anger out on the boys. It seems that he has no control over his temper anymore." I nodded my head as I gritted my teeth together.

I knew that I had hurt Spot more than anybody ever had and that his behavior was due partly to me. But I couldn't understand why he had to be so stubborn about it. I was worried because I knew how bad his temper could get. But I was also angry because he wasn't being rational and he wouldn't just stop for a second and listen to what I have to say. So the more I thought about it, the angrier I became.

If he wanted to be the same arrogant leader of Brooklyn, that everybody thought he was. Then so be it, but I wasn't going to sit around and wait for him to make up his mind. How dense could I possible get. There was a perfectly wonderful boy sitting in front of me who thought I was everything and I blew him off without even a second glance. If Spot wouldn't give me a chance, then why should I give him one?

I turned to look at Booker. "No, I'm sorry. I should have given you a chance to say how you felt. You're a wonderful kid and you mean a lot to me. So to make up for it, how would you like to go to Medda's Party with me?"

I laughed at the shocked expression on his face. There was a lot of things that I knew he was probably thinking that I could say and that was not one of them. He looked cautious at first but then began to speak. "But, umm what about Spot?" 9/3/04

I gritted my teeth together once more. "I'm a seventeen year old women. I think I can handle making decisions on my own. Spot had his chance. I care about him but that doesn't mean that I don't care about you also."

Booker thought about it for a moment and then nodded his head. "Alright then, I mean its just a party." I smiled and kissed him quickly on the cheek. Then he stood up, to leave. "Well I better get going."

I stood up also and followed him down the fire escape and into my room. "I really am glad that you stopped by." Booker smiled and then left.

With a sigh of relief I walked over and flopped down on my bed. I laid there for hours just staring at the ceiling. Even though my heart was telling me otherwise, I still couldn't help being angry at Spot. Why should I always be the one to make sacrifices in our relationship. Its about time that he realized that I am not going to be around forever and he better get his act straight or I'll be gone for good.

Thank you:

OcdChick- Thanks so much! I know the chapter was depressing. I hate when I have to write those but it is a depressing story. I don't know why I get sucked into writing those. Anyway keep reading and I hope you liked this chapter. Next chapter things get a little bit more interesting.

C.M. Higgins- I can't believe I haven't had the time to talk to you. With school and everything it is so busy. I sent you the chapter but you may just end up reading this first. Anyway, Thanks so much! I am really happy that you love my story. Of course I had to make Race win at poker, he has to! Well I will talk to you whenever I see you online. Lylas!

Splashey- Every review you give me is so nice! I know what you mean about liking Booker better right now, that was everything that I was trying to get at. You will like him even better after next chapter. Thank you so much for all of your nice comments. I can't believe it. Just six more chapters to go. I will be really sad when I have to end it. But thanks for being such a constant reviewer. I know this chapter wasn't very exciting but I had to bring in Booker again, somehow. This is where Hanna starts to hang around Booker just to make Spot angry. But things don't exactly go the way she plans. I can't tell you anymore but you will see once I post the next chapter.

Dimonah Tralon- Hey! I am glad that you understood about not having a lot of time to write. School just started so I didn't have a lot of time now either. But I will make sure to get everything done. I am so happy that you like my story and I hope to hear from you again. This chapter wasn't the best but next chapter will be really good.

Swimade333- Yeah I am sorry about not updating last Friday. If I was home I would have. This chapter is a little dull but there will be more exciting stuff happening next chapter. It's Medda's Party! I really appreciate you saying that my story is one of the best on I don't know if I could agree with you there, but it still means so much to me.

Spunkz- I am glad you liked the last chapter. I understand about the hurricane and I hope everything turns out ok. So if I don't hear from you I will know what happens. This chapter wasn't the best, but next chapter will be great!

NadaZimri- Thanks so much! Yeah I was happy when I got to make Race and Hanna make up. I hated having to write about when they were fighting. It seems like she can never win in this story and be friends with both of them. Anyway thanks for the compliments and I hope you liked these last two chapters.

Joker is Poker with a J- Thank you! I am really glad you liked the last chapter. I can't exactly confirm you guess. Because I don't wanna spoil the rest of the story. But I will say that you just have to wait and see…Well I hope to hear from you soon! The next chapter will be fun!

Koodles4You- Wow that was such a nice review! I was happy for days after I read it. I know I should think more highly of my story, but I see all of the imperfections. I am very happy that you think I did a good job of showing how Hanna is deteriorating basically. I was trying to make it slower just to make it seem more realistic. Yeah things are gunna get a lot worse starting with the next chapter. As I told many people who read my stuff, I don't know why but I just tend to write sad stories. But I can't say that it will be all horrible. There are still six more chapters to write. I hope you keep reading and let me know what you thought of this chapter.

The Good Girl- Hey, well I am so so glad that you like my character and its alright if you thought she cries allot, because its true. I have been trying as hard as I can not to make her a Mary Sue and I am so happy that I accomplished it. I really don't like it very much when people write stories where the main character is completely perfect. I mean sometimes you want to write them like that but I think its best if you don't. It makes the character seem more realistic. I am really glad that you think my story is Kick Ass, lol. I have been reading back over it and there are so, so many things that I need to fix in the beginning. So I in six more weeks when I am finished I will be going back and changing some things. I am so happy to always hear what you think of every chapter. So I hope to keep hearing from you. I can't believe I only have six more chapters left, that's crazy!

Crazer57- Hey! I am so happy to see that I have a new reviewer. I am glad that you chose my story as the first one to read in about a year. Actually I know exactly what you mean about just having to have newsies. I started reading Harry Potter for awhile but then I just had to come back to newsies. I am really happy that you find my story exciting and I hope to hear from you soon.

Luv ya all,

BlackWiltedRose


	26. Revenge

****

Hey everyone! Here is the next chapter, I am so sorry that It took me so long to post it. I have been so incredibly busy with school that I just haven't had the time. I hurried up and got this written because I have my high school football game to go to today! I hope you like this chapter. Let me know what you think!

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

****

Chapter Twenty-Five

The next two days went by rather quickly. Everything just seemed so natural as I got back into the familiar rhythm of how things worked. With the help of Racetrack I had begun eating more often and spent most of my time just worrying about getting my strength back up. Now that Olivia knew where I was staying she would come by every day to visit and we would talk up on the roof. Booker also began showing up every day and I welcomed his company. He would sell the morning addition in Brooklyn and then come to Manhattan to sell the evening papers.

Everything in the Lodging House seemed to be back to normal. Except the small fact that every other day, Jack would leave and make is annual trip to Brooklyn. I asked him how everything was going over there and he told me that there was nothing to worry about. Spot hadn't heard anything from Queens yet, it seems like they were just hanging low for a little. But Jack didn't believe for a second that they had backed down and he warned Spot to keep an eye open because they were planning something.

Everything was going by so fast that I completely forgot that Medda's party was today. I was really exhausted from a late poker game the night before, so I refused to get up when Race pounded on the door for me to wake up. But being as persistent as he was, he opened the door and jumped on my bed. "Get off me Race!" I grumbled.

"Ya gotta wake up!" He said laughing as he shook me some more.

"Why?" I asked irritated.

"Because Medda's party's today." When he said this, I moaned and sat up.

"I completely forgot about that," I replied, yawning. "But why are you waking me up so early? The party isn't till tonight."

"I wan't ya ta come sellin wit me today. It would be good ta get ya up an out of da Lodging House." I glared at him and then nodded my head.

Sometimes I couldn't figure out just why Racetrack cared so much about what I did or didn't do. But then other times I was so incredibly gratefully for his concern. Over the time that I had spent with the newsies, Race had become like my temporary older brother, even though he was the same age as me. It was strange to me to have someone who was concerned about my well being, because all my life I had been a loner. But even people who have spent there entire lives taking care of themselves, needs help every once in awhile. Just the satisfaction of knowing that someone out there would be there to help them, even if they didn't ask for it.

"Alright, I'll go." I said exasperatedly, as I stood up and walked over to my dresser. Racetrack lounged out on my bed with a triumphant expression on his face.

"I heard your goin wit Booker to da party tonight," He stated but I knew it was directed more as a question.

"Yeah, I am." I replied as I rummaged around in my dresser for a dress to wear. Recently I hadn't been as concerned about my looks and really didn't care to much about what I looked like. Everyone around here had seen me at my worst and even with a little effort I could look far better than that.

"Do you like him?" Race asked after a short pause. Even though I knew the question was coming I still didn't want to answer it.

"Yes," I replied calmly.

"Den dis isn't just sum plan ta make Spot angry," He asked curiously.

I took a deep breath and turned around. "No, it most certainly is not. Booker is a very good friend of mine and he cares about me very much. Why, all of a sudden, does everything I do or say have to be somehow connected with Spot Conlon! He doesn't control my life and the decisions that I make."

"But you still love him," He stated as he looked into my eyes. I felt very vulnerable, as if he could see right through me and tell exactly what was in my heart.

I realized then, that I had been holding my breath and I let it out deeply. Then looked back at my friend. "Spot made his decision Race and I've made mine. Its very hard to move on with my life when everyone I know is still stuck in the past."

"Why do ya always have ta give up without a fight?" Race asked me.

"I'm not giving up!" I said defensively. "You should know far better than I do that Spot is a very strong and solitary person, Race. He does what he wants and looks out for himself above anything. Most people say he's cold hearted, but he's not really. Spot believes that if he doesn't care about anything or anyone, then there is no chance of him getting hurt. He's invincible, the almighty Spot Conlon. But I hurt him Race, really badly and he will never forgive me for that. So I'm not giving up, I'm moving on. Because there is no chance of ever going back again."

"But it wasn't your fault," Race said.

"Spot doesn't know that, he only knows what he saw." I said sadly.

"Just get Booker to tell him that it wasn't your fault," Race suggested.

"He won't listen," I replied.

"Then make him listen!"

"And how exactly do you suggest I do that Race. Spot doesn't even want to see my face, let alone hear what I have to say." I explained as I walked over and sat down in the chair by the window.

"He loves you," Race said flatly. "Everyone who knows him can see it."

"No, he used to love me!" I replied quietly as I looked at the people walking by outside my bedroom window.

Race stood up and walked over to the door, "He still does and he'll realize it one of des' days. Now get dressed, we gots papes ta sell."

I sat there staring at the closed door for a few minutes after Race had left. Was he right? Did Spot still love me or was I just fooling myself? All I knew was that I didn't really have time to think about it and I stood up off the bed once more. I pulled on a simple white skirt and blouse. It had a thick yellow ribbon that was tied around my waist. I knew that I had more clothes than I needed, but they were the only possessions that I had left from my old life and I didn't have the heart to get rid of any of them.

After I left my room and cleaned up a bit, Racetrack and I left for the distribution center. We made it there just as the circulation bell rang. We were at the back of the line but Race didn't care. He asked me if I wanted to sell some myself and I refused.

"I have some money saved up still. You need it more than I do." He nodded his head in agreement.

So I walked beside him calmly as we made our way around the streets of Manhattan. The sound of the chatter and the noise of the newsies yelling out the headlines, whether they were correct or not, had become rather soothing to me. I don't know if it had anything to do with just the simple fact that I had become so accustomed to the way my life was that everything just seemed to blend together.

I no longer felt like I was living. I just felt like I was walking around in a body that no longer belong to me. It made me sad to think that I could look at moments such as this where nothing out of the ordinary happens and consider it one of the best days that I have had in weeks. I had grown to prepare myself for the worst, because even though things were going good. Somehow in the back of my mind I knew that it was just going to get worse.

"Ya wanna stop at Tibby's for lunch?" Race asked as we walked down the crowded sidewalk towards the old restaurant.

I nodded my head and agreed. "Alright," I said with a melancholy tone to my voice. Racetrack looked over at me and raised an eyebrow, wondering at my sudden change of attitude. But he didn't say anything, he just shrugged his shoulders and walked inside. I think he had become accustomed to my strange change in behavior.

I stepped over the threshold and looked around the room. There were many newsies sitting around talking and a few old men smoking cigars in the corner booth. Many of them yelled greetings to us as we walked over to a booth sitting below a long window. I smiled as I acknowledged each of them in turn but then my heart turned cold when I met a pair of icy blue eyes.

The bright smile faded off my face and I looked away. Spot Conlon was sitting with a few of his Brooklyn pals and he stopped drinking when I walked into the building. We stared at each other for a few moments and I could feel the hatred in his glare, penetrate through my skin.

I felt a cold sweat come over me and I had to fight to control my hands from shaking. With all the will that I had, I forced myself to look away. I held my head high as I walked passed Spot and joined Race at the table. I could see him glare at me out of the corner of my eye and I just tried as hard as I could to ignore it. I refused to give him the satisfaction of knowing how broken I was.

Racetrack looked up at me concerned, as he leaned over the table and said softly. "Are you alright?"

I looked up at him, took a deep breath and then sighed. "Yeah, I'm fine."

I don't think Race fully believed me when I said I was alright, but there was nothing else I could do. My mind kept wondering back to Spots face and the look he had given me when I walked in. His eyes were blazing with furry, but I was the only one who saw the hurt that lingered deep down within him. It smashed my heart into thousands of tiny peaces when I realize that I was the cause of it. Even though I somehow knew that it was just as much of his fault for not listening, as it was mine.

Yet in a way I think that I was just feeling angry at myself because I was tired of running away from my problems. I felt like a coward for hiding behind my friends rather than facing my fears. But I had run away from Brooklyn not because I was scared but because Spot intimidated me. Not only was he the first boy that I had ever truly loved, but he was the first person who had loved me in return and now because of one stupid accident that should never have happened, he hated me.

For a few moments I couldn't understand why he had come to Manhattan so early. I looked up at Race and sighed. "Do I really have to go to this party tonight?" I asked. He looked up at me over his glass of water and nodded.

"Yeah doll, a bets, a bet and der' aint no backin out now." I smiled weakly, trying to play off any of the emotion that boiled inside me.

"Fine, have it your way." I replied.

Race could tell by my change in behavior that I wasn't at all comfortable sitting in the diner with Spot Conlon only two booths down from us. So he finished his drink quickly and we stood up to leave. A few of the Brooklyn boys looked up at me and sneered. They probably knew everything that had happened by now and I don't know how much Spot was open enough to tell them. Although I still felt slightly guilty because I thought that I was having problems, I didn't even want to think of the hell that Booker was going through. But from the few times he had stopped by to visit me, he didn't seem to upset. He just mentioned casually one day that Spot had yet to talk to him and he was just waiting for the day that he would finally snap.

I stared firmly at Racetrack and held strong once more as I walked passed Spot's table and out the door. I had never been more thankful to feel the cool breeze blowing against my face. There was something about the fresh air that temporarily carried all of my problems away. It didn't take us long to make it back to the Lodging House and I decided to sit out and talk with Mush a little, while we were waiting for everyone to return.

Finally the sun started to set and it was time to get ready for the party. I had already picked out the dress that I was going to wear, a few days before and couldn't wait to see the looks on the boys faces when I showed them. It was one of my favorite _casual_ dresses that I used to wear around my house when there was a guest staying who I wanted to impress. It was made of burgundy silk and trimmed with velvet and white lace. All of my dresses had be tailored to fit me perfectly and the sleeves were long and draped delicately over my shoulders. I decided to pull my hair back into a rather intricate design and weave it with ribbon. I knew Booker would arrive for me in an hour, so I had to quicken my pace. I put on a bit of blush and my skin was so pale that I didn't need any powder. When I finally finished I stood back and looked at myself in the mirror. I couldn't help but smile appraisingly.

If I was being forced to go to this party, I wasn't going to just stand around and let the night go to waist. I would have a good time and for once, let my problems slip away. If Spot wanted to be stubborn and not listen to me, then I would show him what he's missing. Like I had said before, I refuse to just sit around and wait for him to make up his mind. I absolutely will not go crawling back to him like some kind of worthless dog.

I am going to go to this party with a very good friend, who cares about me very dearly. I will laugh and I will have fun, forgetting about everything and everyone that has ever hurt me. Tonight I will focus on me and nobody else.

I heard that familiar nock on the door and I took a deep breath before I told Race to come in. He opened the door and walked inside. When he saw me he stopped and his eyes grew wide. "Wow, ya look great!" Racetrack replied after a few minutes of gawking at me.

I think I had shocked him so much because it had been almost to two months since he had last seen me look this nice. I smiled slightly, feeling the heat rush to my face. "Thank you. Its not to…overdone, is it?" I asked. Knowing that I would be going to a party with a bunch of poor children. But Racetrack just shook his head and laughed.

"No, its good ta see ya back ta ya old ways again. It wasn't healthy, da way ya was living before." I nodded my head and walked over to him.

"I know," I said and then surprisingly I reached over and hugged him. Race fidgeted uncomfortably but hugged me in return.

"What was dat for?" He asked when I pulled away.

I just laughed and patted him on the shoulder. "For helping me."

"Ya deserve it. Now come on Booker's waitin." He took my hand and we walked out into the bunk room.

I was thankful that all of the boys were downstairs and I waited for Racetrack to grab his hat before we started walking down the steps. I could hear most of the boys jumping around and making noises. But I was shocked to hear everything go silent when I stepped down into the entryway.  
I smiled brilliantly, as I got the reaction that I had been looking for. The boys stood there staring at me, as if it was the first time that they had ever saw me. I knew it was because they had grown to consider me basically one of the guys. So to finally be reminded that I was a decent looking young women, startled them. Booker just smiled and walked over to me.

"Ya look beautiful!" He said as he kissed me on the cheek.

"Thank you," I said gratefully. I was happy that at least somebody in the room had the will to speak.

Finally most of the boys snapped out of it and walked over. "Hey Dollface, ya clean up real good." Blink said winking at me. I just shoved him playfully in the arm.

"Yeah, no wonda ya had so many guy's chasin afta ya. I woulda joined dem, if I didn't have a goil watin for me." A quarky dark haired boy replied from the far right corner of the room.

"I am shore ya would Fetch," I said laughing. "Now what are we standing around here for when there's a party to go to?"

The boys agreed and a few of them cheered loudly as we made our way out the door. It was getting dark as we walked the damp streets of Manhattan. We could easily maneuver our way to the theater because most of the people were in there houses eating dinner. We could hear our voices echoing against the brick buildings that towered above us. Finally we arrived at our destination.

Boys were crowding into the theater from every direction. Because when Medda threw a party, newsies from every neighborhood showed up. I looked around and caught a few stares aimed in my direction. But I wasn't afraid like I normally was, today I craved the attention. I was in such a daze that I didn't even notice that Booker had my hand. When we finally got inside we took a seat up by the stage, at a table with Mush, Blink and Skittery. I knew that Race wanted to sit with Jack, but that would also mean that we would have to sit with Spot as well. So I took a seat with Booker and let Race go with Jack. He looked rather cautious about the decision but I finally convinced him that I would be alright.

The boys and I sat and talked for a little before the lights went down and the music started. Medda looked wonderful, like she always did and the boys watched transfixed as she sang. I was surprised to hear myself singing along with a few of the songs that I had listened to for the short time that I had taken up working at the theater.

I felt very bad because of how nice it had been for Medda to give me a job like she had and how irresponsible it was for me to have run out. But I knew in the back of my head that I wouldn't be doing any more spontaneous adventures and I would finally get my act together, if fate allowed it.

When Medda finally finished singing, some of the more smaller acts came on. A bunch of the boys re-arranged some of the tables so that there was room to dance and the rest of them sat around playing poker like they always do. From talking to one of the waitresses that I used to work with, I found out that Olivia had the night off and that she should be showing up anytime. This made me even more ecstatic because I knew that I would have all of my closest friends with me.

Even though I was having the time of my life, I still couldn't control myself and found my eyes wondering over to Spots table. But never once did he look up at me in return. So I would just shrug it off and turn to talk to my friends

again.

Sometimes I felt like I was using Booker. Like the only reason I had asked to be his date was to get back at Spot. But now that Spot wasn't even paying attention, something felt like it was missing. Booker reached over and held my hand in his. I looked up at him in surprise but smiled softly. I knew I could have pulled my hand away just then. I could have told him that we were only friends and that was all we could ever be. But he looked so happy that I couldn't hurt him like that. I was already to far into the lie to go back on my word.

I was starting to get uncomfortable in my situation and was incredibly relieved when I saw Olivia walk through the door. She had on a lovely yellow and white dress. "Excuse me for a second." I said to the guys at my table. They didn't seem to really notice because they were in the middle of a heated debate.

I weaved my way through the throng of young men, who were eyeing me up rather distastefully. Finally I made it through and wrapped my arms around Olivia. "I'm so glad you came!"

Olivia just laughed and smiled at me. "Well ya didn't think that I was going to leave ya here by yourself, did ya?"

She knew how much I was dreading coming to this party and the trouble that I always ended up getting myself into. Olivia was one of the only people who knew _everything_ about what I was feeling and I was so grateful that she would take time out of her way to stay with me. "So, anything traumatizing happen yet?"

I laughed, "No, not yet." She smiled as we began walking back to my designated table. Booker looked up and smiled at us when we returned. Blink stood up and let Olivia sit, while he grabbed another chair from the table beside us.

We started talking about many random and unimportant topics, such as the Delancy brothers and what the headline was going to be like the next day. Soon the night was wearing away and I had found that I was enjoying myself rather tremendously. Race would appear every now and then to check on me, but then would leave when he knew that I was fine.

Even though I was having fun somehow I knew that nothing good lasts forever. We were in the middle of a card game when I heard a rather high pitched, familiar laugh, coming from behind me. Something in my head told me not to pay attention but my intuition took control. I turned around to look and immediately wished I hadn't.  
The laugh had come from none other than Rose, who had mysteriously showed up sometime during the night. She was sitting on Spots lap at the table and was laughing at something he had said. His arm was around her waste and I could tell by his behavior that he was drunk. Race and Jack just continued on with the game, trying not to pay attention to what was going on. But I felt like someone had smashed my head into a brick wall, when I watched Spot lean in and kiss her.

That was all I could watch as I turn my head around quickly. I looked down at the cards in my hand and didn't dare look up. I knew that the rest of my table had saw and I could feel there eyes on me. They were waiting to see how I would react to what we had just witnessed.

I just sat there for a few minutes doing nothing at all. I couldn't even remember who's turn it was in the game. All I could think of was how betrayed and hurt I felt. I didn't even notice that my hands were shaking slightly. Suddenly I couldn't take it any more, I sat my cards down on the table and got to my feet. "Excuse me." I said to the boys, without looking into there eyes and headed towards the bathroom. I heard another chair pull out and I knew that Olivia was following me.

A few people looked at me angrily as I shoved passed them. Finally I made it to the door on the opposite side of the room. When I walked inside, I was happy to see that it was empty. I walked over and sat down on a red bench that was up against the wall to my right. I leaned my head on the brick behind me and sighed.

I heard the bathroom door open and the soft footsteps of Olivia as she walked over and kneeled down in front of me. "Are you alright?" I heard her say softly.

I nodded my head in a silent reply, but never looked up. When I finally did, I hated the pity I saw in her eyes. "I'm fine, really. It just…It just hurts." I said while trying not to cry.

"I know," Olivia replied sadly. "But its not your fault."  
"It is my fault. I am getting what I deserve." I said staunchly.

"Nobody deserves this," Olivia said. "This wasn't your fault and don't let anybody convince ya otherwise."

I didn't answer her but I looked into her eyes and said. "Could we please leave?"

She nodded her head and helped me to my feet. I fixed myself up a bit in the mirror before we walked out the door and over to the boys. They were still staring at me questioningly. Olivia decided to speak, "Were done for da night. So were gunna head back to da lodging house. I'm gunna stay the night also, if ya don't mind."

"Nah, we don't mind." Blink said.

"Could ya tell Race that were leaving." They nodded there head in agreement.

I turned around quickly, wanting to get out of that place as fast as possible. I couldn't take seeing Spot or hearing the fake laugh of Rose any longer. Knowing that he was with another girl was killing me inside. I knew that I had done basically the same thing to him, by inviting Booker to come in the first place. But I never would have purposely kissed another boy or done anything that would hurt Spot like he had just hurt me. I knew that I half expected him to show up with another girl. Because he had to much pride to show up alone. But why did he have to go with _her_.

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Thank you to ALL of my reviewers! Since I am kinda behind I am not going to post responses to my reviews in this chapter. Thank you all so much for your support and to all of those new reviewers, I am so happy that you decided to read my story. It means a lot to me. Thanks!


	27. Bad Feelings

Wow! Chapter twenty six! I can't believe I have made it this far. I told myself at the very beginning that I would finish this story and I will. Only four more chapters to go. It makes me kinda sad. But I am also relived in a way. I can get on with my other stories. The one's that I have been slacking off on. I can't believe that I have 200 reviews. That's crazy. Thank you guys so much!

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Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

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Chapter Twenty-six

It wasn't exactly safe, walking around the streets of New York alone, at night. But Olivia and I made it back to the Lodging House without any problems. I couldn't stand being locked up in that theater any longer. It held to many memories of all of the mistakes that I had made over the last two months. I didn't know what to do anymore, it seemed like everywhere I turned there was another reminder of my past. I just wanted to move on, but there were so many regrets holding me back.

When we returned to my temporary home, I set up a bunch of blankets on the floor and Olivia slept in my room that night. We talked for a little while about random topics, things that I would soon forget by the next morning. But Olivia knew that I wasn't ready to pour my heart out and that I would talk to her when the time was right. So she just gave me my space and we fell asleep as the sun was rising.

Another three days went by without anything interesting happening. I spent most of the time wondering about the Lodging House. I was surprised that Racetrack hadn't came and spoke with me yet about what happened at the party. I think he was just happy that I was learning to take things a lot better than I used to. I didn't cry, I didn't stop eating or lock myself in my room. But even though I was able to fool the minds of those around me. I was still unable to fool myself.

Booker continued to stop by every day to visit me and he was gracious enough not to mention the party when we spoke. Every once in awhile I would ask him how things were going in Brooklyn and he would go into a story about something insignificant that one of the newsies did. But each time he refused to allow himself to mention Spot Conlon.

Even though I secretly blamed him for everything that had happened, I couldn't help saying that I didn't love his company. Race and Booker had become like my stepping stones, the rocks that held me up when I could no longer hold myself. I didn't know what I would do without either of them in my life. But I still couldn't help thinking about Spot. He had been the only thing that was worth living for.

I woke up to a foggy morning as I looked out my bedroom window. The glass was slightly frosted and I drew a sun on it with the tip of my finger. It was a habit that my mother had always scolded me for and yet I still had yet to concur it. I turned around and walked over to my dresser. I could tell that it was still early as I got dressed and tip toed out of the room. I needed to use the bathroom before the boys got up and I wanted to beat the morning rush.

I couldn't help but smile at how peaceful they looked when they slept. Sometimes when I was a little girl I used to sit and stare at my parents while they slept, wondering what they were dreaming about. I would spend all day just thinking about whether or not it was any better than there actual life. But that was when I was young and oblivious to the actual cruelty that people had to face everyday.

I finished washing my face in the sink and then returned to my room. I decided that there wasn't anything better to do until the boys woke up. So I rummaged through my dresser and found a light shawl that I threw over my shoulders. Then I opened the window and climbed up on the roof. By then the fog was clearing away and the sun was starting to rise, turning the sky a light shade of orange and purple. I didn't know why, but I had a uneasy feeling in my stomach that morning.

I knew that the reason I had awoke so early was because I had spent all night tossing and turning in my bed. I had a horrible feeling that something bad was going to happen. Maybe I was being paranoid. But maybe I had just grown so used to trouble that I could tell when it was coming before it even got there.

Yet I also knew in my head that I hadn't felt completely normal ever since I was sick. The small pains in my stomach would go away for hours at a time and then come back when I least expected it. It wasn't as bad as it used to be. But sometimes I would get lightheaded and nauseated in the middle of the night and wake up in a cold sweat. I didn't know exactly what was wrong with me. Bust as long as I was still able to function properly, I placed it in the back of my mind.

I loved sitting up on the roof because I loved being able to look out over the entire city. I think it was because it made me feel like, for just a second, that I was back on top of the world. These were the times when I missed being part of the upper class society. Only a few months ago I had hated everything about being rich. But I now hate being poor even more. I hate having people look down on me for no reason at all. I hate being dirty and starving when I go to bed at night. I hate watching my friends suffer and know that there is nothing I could do to help. But somehow these new feeling made me hate my old life even more. Because I realize now that I had contributed to this horrible corruption of society.

I started to get upset and decided to stop thinking about those things and just sat on the roof listening to the sounds of the city. The soft murmur of the crowd in the market place that was set up only a street away from the Lodging House. The soft chirping of the baby birds in the nest that was made in the corner of the roof and the thumping of many feet on a hard wood floor as the boys finally woke up downstairs.

After a few minutes passed by I heard Racetrack knock on my bedroom door. When I didn't answer he opened it up and walked in. I waited patiently as he climbed up the fire escape and smiled when his head appeared over the wall.

"Why are ya up so early?" he asked curiously as he walked over and joined me on the wall.

I just shrugged my shoulders and looked back over the city. "I didn't sleep very well." I was careful not to mention the fact that it was because I was scared that something was going to happen or that my stomach was still hurting. Because I knew that he would become worried and want me to go to the doctors. Even though we both knew that we didn't have enough money to pay for the bill. The doctor had been generous before when I had gotten sick the first time. But I had a feeling that he wouldn't be so nice the second time I showed up without any money. 

"Are ya gunna come selling wit me today?" Race asked. I thought about it for a moment. For the last few days I had been going with him to sell the morning edition. It made the day go by just a little bit faster. But I knew that today I wasn't feeling completely up to it. Besides the other day I almost had a close run in with Rose. Jack was smart enough and quickly dragged me away before anything could happen. I just pretended like I didn't see her there talking with her blonde haired friend about Spot.

"I think I will just stay in today, Race. If that's all right?" He nodded his head.

"Yeah its fine," Race said as he looked over at me and then a few minutes later he spoke again. "Are ya sure your alright?"

I looked over and met his eyes. I contemplated whether or not I should tell him how I was worried that something was going to happen today. But I knew he would just think that I was strange. Because I didn't know what was going to happen or who it was going to happen to. So I just nodded my head. "Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just tired that's all."

He seemed to find that as an antiquate excuse and got to his feet. "Ok, well I'll be back later. Is Booker stopping by again today?"

"He should be," I replied.

Race nodded his head. "Alright Doll, stay outta trouble."

"I will," I said as Race climbed back down the fire escape.

I didn't know what I was going to do while they were away. So I just sat up there for another half an hour. I watched the newsies from the roof as they left and headed for the distribution center. Once they were long gone from view, I stood up and went back downstairs. When I looked around my room, I realized just how dirty it actually was. So I decided that while they were away I would clean up a bit.

I grabbed a small bucket from a closet in the bunk room and filled it up with the cold water. I grabbed an old rag that nobody would use and went back into my dark bedroom. I decided to clean the window first because so much dirt had collected on it that the sun was barely able to shine through. But after two wipes the rag was filthy and I knew that this would take awhile.

Once I was finished cleaning the window it was amazing how much brighter my room looked. I cleaned the mirror on my dresser next and had to refill the water before I started on everything else. I wiped off the brass bars of my bed and the wooden legs of the chair that sat in the corner. After I was finished cleaning, I swept the floor and started picking up my clothes. I placed out the dresses that were the most filthy and removed the blanket and sheets from my bed. I threw them into a basket and took them into the bathroom. I had never done my own laundry before but did my best to clean them. My hands were raw from scrubbing as I threw them back into the basket and took them up onto the roof. I hung them on an old clothes line and tried my hardest to keep the wind from blowing them away.

I was so exhausted that I went back downstairs and fell asleep on Racetracks bed, since my own sheets were wet. I woke up with the sound of someone calling my name and shaking my shoulder gently. I expected to see Race but when my vision finally cleared I was staring into the hazel eyes of Olivia. "Sorry for wakin ya up." She said smiling.

"Oh, its alright. I was just taking a quick nap." I replied as I yawned and stretched out my arms. "What are you doing here?"

"I have off work today so I decided to come and visit." Olivia said as she sat down on the bed next to me. "Besides I need da talk ta ya."

"Alright, lets go back up on the roof. I need to make sure my clothes didn't blow away." I replied smiling.

I could now feel the summer sun beating down on me as I once again climbed back up the fire escape, this time with Olivia behind me. "So how have ya been?" she asked once were sitting down comfortably on the wall.

"Alright, I guess."

"That's good. I'm happy to see dat your takin things better than I thought." Olivia replied happily.

I just smiled at her and shook my head. "Why all of a sudden is everybody so concerned with my well being? I can take care of myself."

Even though my words came out a little harsh, Olivia didn't take it personally. She had been around me long enough now to know how I expressed things. She just ignored my comment and continued smiling. "Because your our friend, Hanna."

That was the first time in awhile that anybody had called me by my real name. It was so foreign to my ears that it felt like it didn't belong to me anymore. But Olivia was the only one who I allowed to call me that. Because it would have been rather strange for a girl to call me Dollface. "I know, it's just a little frustrating at times."

Olivia nodded in understanding and then we fell into an uncomfortable silence. I knew that she had something that she wanted to say to me. I could tell by her nervous movements, as she fidgeted beside me. So I just sat there until she finally cracked. It didn't take very long before she turned to me. "I have something I need to tell you." The worried look in her eyes made me slightly nervous.

"What is it?" I asked, trying to keep my voice steady.

"Well, here it goes…yesterday morning I got a letter from my aunt who lives in Boston. I had been keeping in touch with her ever since my mother died. She had just gotten married to a very wealthy business man and she was telling me how they were having a beautiful home built in Virginia. But there is still much work to be done before it finally becomes livable. Well you see, she has always wanted children but she found out when she was younger that she was unable to have any. So she wants me to come and live with her and help her get the house ready." For a few moments after Olivia finished the information didn't quit sink in. "But you see, I had spoke of you before in many of my letters and she wishes for you to come as well."

My eyes grew wide in shock as I tried to understand what she was saying. "You want me to go with you to live at your aunts house in Virginia?" I asked.

"Yes," Olivia said slowly. Knowing that this was a lot of information for me to take in.

"Would we ever be returning to New York?"

"Most likely, no." Olivia replied. "She said that as long as we help out around the house she will pay for us to go to school down there. That would be our new home, Hanna."

I sat there in a daze for what seemed like hours. Olivia was asking me if I wanted to leave. To go and live in a normal house with a normal family. To leave behind everything that I had ever known and ever loved. But she had also just given me a permanent escape from the pain of my life. It was a chance to start anew, to get back everything that I was missing. Was I ready for such a change?  
I looked up at her with a furrowed brow, "I will have to think about this." I said. "I can not just rush into a decision."

"Yes, I understand." Olivia replied with a smile.

"When would you be leaving?" I asked.

"We would be leaving in four days. I know its soon but it's a very long trip." Olivia replied as she got to her feet. "Well I have to get back home. I know it's a hard decision, but think about it. There's nothing left for you here."

I watched her leave as her words lingered in my mind. Was she right? Was there nothing left for me here. I got up and walked over to the clothes as I took them off the line and folded them up. I carried the basket down into my room and was putting the sheets back on my bed when I heard some of the boys return.

I looked up quickly when I heard the creaking of the door hinges as it was pushed open. Jack was standing there smirking at me from the doorway. "Hey Dollface," he said. I was curious as to what he wanted but I just kept my mouth shut.

"Hey Jack," I replied.

He looked around the room with amazement. "Wow, ya sure did a good job cleanin up around here." He said and then tilted his head to the side. "What's wrong?"

I stared up at him confused. "There's nothing wrong…why?"

"Because ya always clean when your upset." he replied. "And I finally got used ta having ya happy again. So whats wrong?" This made me laugh.

"There is nothing wrong, Jack. I didn't clean because I'm upset, I cleaned my room because I was bored and it gave me something to do." Jack raised his eyebrow like he didn't believe me. I sighed and glared at him. "Really…there's nothing wrong."

"Alright," Jack said. He turned around to leave but then he remembered something. "Hey, did Booker stop by today? I needed to talk to him."

I shook my head. "No, he was supposed to. Maybe he is running late. I'm sure he will show up later."

But the day went on and hours passed by, yet Booker still didn't show up. He had mentioned yesterday that he would definitely be here today and he wasn't one to break his word. By dinner time, I was becoming slightly nervous. What could have happened that would keep him in Brooklyn? I was sure that I was just overreacting and so I walked out to find Racetrack. "Hey Dollface," Race replied in his normal greeting.

"Hey Race," I said as I sat down on the bed beside his own. "How was your day?" I asked trying to start a conversation.

He just made a huffing noise and sat up in his bed. "Da headline sucks! I barely made fifty cents. I hope it gets betta or I'll be livin on da streets."

Even though they were all broke the boys decided to go to Tibby's for dinner. With a little bit of convincing from Racetrack I had been persuaded to come along. My stomach was starting to hurt a little bit but I just ignored it. It was a nice day out and I laughed most of the way as Mush told us about some girl he met.

We sat down in our normal booths in the restaurant and the waiter brought us out some water. Everyone who worked at Tibby's knew us and didn't mind if we stopped by as long as we didn't cause any problems. I sat at a booth with Race, Jack, Mush and Kid Blink. I told them that I still had some money left and that I would pay for them to eat. But they refused to let me spend my last bit of money on them, so we all just sat there and talked.

Everything was going great and I had almost completely forgot about Booker when we heard the bell above the door chime and he came walking in. He was panting heavily as if he had just run all the way from Brooklyn and he tried his hardest to catch his breath. Jack stood up quickly and went over to him. "Whats goin on?" He asked sternly.

"Its…Its Blade," Booker panted. All of the newsies sat quietly and listened.

"What about Blade?" Jack asked.

"I was walkin here when I saw Blade. I was wonderin what he was doin in Manhattan but I didn't think anything of it. Then I saw him meet up with Flasher." I remembered Flasher from the second day I arrived in Manhattan. He was the one newsie who didn't want me to stay. I listened intently as Booker continued. "Well when I was walkin by I heard dem mention Brooklyn. Der was somethin about da way that dey were actin that was makin me suspicious. So I hid behind a trash can ta listen to what dey were sayin." He stopped to breath for a second and then continued. "Its Queens, Jack! Blade and Flasher have been on der side all along. I heard Blade telling him how they were planning on takin Spot outta power and how he was gunna take over. He was saying dat der would be a union between Brooklyn and Queens. Flasher was spying on Manhattan all along, tryin to see if you were gunna do anything ta help Spot. But Blade doesn't just want ta take Spot outta power…der gunna kill em' Jack! At sunset tonight!"

"What! We don't got anytime ta get der!" Jack said as he swore to himself. I jerked my head sideways and looked out the window. My heart sunk as I saw the sky turning colors. There was probably only a half an hour before the sun was completely down. I jumped to my feet and everyone looked at me.

Before I knew what I was doing I ran towards the door, Jack tried to stop me but I slipped passed him and made it outside. I wasn't about to stand around and wait while Spot had no idea what was going on. There was no time to waste thinking of a plan. I ran as fast as I possibly could towards the Brooklyn Bridge. The sound of many pounding footsteps echoed behind me. "Wait!" I heard Racetrack yell.

"There isn't anytime to wait!" I screamed.

I continued running at full speed and I knew that I had to much of a head start for them to catch me. It was a long distance to Brooklyn and my lungs were burning as I took each breath. The muscles in my legs were throbbing and I felt like I was about to get sick. But no matter how horrible I felt, I could think of nothing but helping Spot.

Then sun had set completely by the time we made it halfway across the Brooklyn Bridge and suddenly something made me stop in my tracks. My heart froze as I saw bright orange flames rising from the docks. The boys caught up with me and stood there silently staring with wide eyes. _Please God, Don't let us be to late!_

****

Thank you:

C.M. Higgins- Lol of course I have to thank you once again! Your reviews are always so nice. You have helped me out with a lot of things and you're a great friend. I am glad I started talking to you. I hope you liked this chapter, although I know you will let me know as soon as you read it. Let me know what you think and you better update Spots Milkshake soon!

ocdchick- I'm happy you are back! I know how it feels when you comp freeze's. I hate when that happens! Mine does that all the time. I am happy you like the story. I haven't really had time to write. So this chapter was sort of rushed. But I still think I did an ok job. I hope you like it. The next chapter is the most important chapter of the story. Thanks again!

Spunkz- Hey! It would suck to keep getting hit by these hurricanes. I live in Pittsburgh and last week we got hit by like, the left over rain and it almost flooded like the entire city. If the three rivers would have gotten a little higher downtown would have been under water. Well, I am glad that you liked the last chapters. Even though I know you probably hate me because Spot and Hanna are not together. But I can't help it, the whole story is already planned out. So I can't change anything. Lol Well the next chapter is the most important one of the story. I hope you don't get hit to bad with the hurricane. I hope to hear from you.

Splashey- I can't believe you are still here after all this time. Lol I think you are the one reviewer that has stuck with me since almost like the beginning. Your reviews are always great and very motivating. Thanks so much! But you make me so happy because you always seem to get everything that I am trying to explain in the story. Some people miss things and then don't understand why I write what I do. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I know it leaves you hanging, but the next chapter is the best one of the whole story!

Swimade333- Your reviews are always so nice. I am very happy that you liked the last chapter. I know I am sorry that they are not together. I can't help it, the story is already planned out and I cant change it. Lol I wish I could. But I hope you like this chapter, it leads up to the next chapter, which is the best one of the entire story. I hope you like it! Well if you can, because its not a very happy chapter.

Clover- Hey! Yeah I know what you mean about Hanna not liking Race. But like you said. She looked up to him too much as a brother. So now it would just be weird for her to like him. Well in her opinion anyway. I am so happy that you are still reading my story and liking it. Lol I hope you liked this chapter. The next chapter is the most important one of the entire story! Let me know what you think!

Joker is Poker with a J- I am happy that you were not to upset about me not updating before. Don't worry, I know what you mean about getting to into stories. I do that all the time. I'm just happy that you can read mine like that. I hope you like this chapter. It leads into the next chapter which is the most important one of the story. Keep letting me know what you think!

Koodles4You- Hey! I am so happy that you were not angry that I made you wait. I didn't mean to I just didn't have anytime. I hate the ending of every chapter to. But I have to write it so that my readers cant wait to read the next chapter. I know you probably hate me for the way this chapters ends. The next chapter is the most important chapter of the story! I cant wait. Don't worry I will definitely have it up next weekend. Because I have most of it already written. I hope you liked this chapter, even though the ending leaves you hanging. I hope to hear from you soon.

The Good Girl- Your review made me laugh! I am glad you think my story kicks ass! Lol I really try. I only have four more chapters to write until the end. Once I am finished I am going back and fixing the things that I messed up on. Which is a lot of stuff! But reviews like yours make my day. Thanks so much!

Fait Aka Taps- Thanks so much! I am so happy that you started reading my story. I hope that you like these chapters! Thanks also for saying that I am a good writer, it means a lot to me.

truecalifornian- Well I'm glad to hear from you again. I know Spot is being an asshole, but I can't help it. The story is already planned out. I hope you liked this chapter…even though the end leaves ya hanging. The next chapter is the best chapter! I can't wait!

Smiley Cad- Your review like made my day. I am so happy that you finally caught up with my story. I know it is long and takes awhile to read. I am so glad that I help you with your stories. It means a lot to me. I know, I don't personally want Booker and Hanna together either. But the story is already planed out so I just have to go with it. Lol I hope you like this chapter. Then next one is the most important one of the entire story. Let me know what you think!

Morning Dew- YOUR BACK! Lol, well sort of. I am just happy that you are reading my story again. I hope you get caught up. I only have like four more chapters to go until the end. Its so crazy! Anyway, your review was so nice and It made my day. Keep reading and I hope to hear from you again.

Luv ya all,

****

BlackWiltedRose


	28. The Apocalypse

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SURPRISE!! I decided to update two days early. I just couldn't take the suspense any longer. I would have updated on Monday if I would have let myself. But I wanted to give people time to review the last chapter. This chapter was both hard and fun to write. I wont give anything away, so you will just have to read and find out what happens. Thank you so much to everyone who reads this story. Even the people who don't have the chance to review. It means the world to me and I never would have finished without you.

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

****

Chapter Twenty-Seven

I could feel the tension all around me as we stood on the bridge staring at the flame illuminating the sky before us. I looked over at Jack and he looked back at me. We both knew what we had to do. "Let's go!" he yelled and we all sprinted towards the Brooklyn Lodging House. By the time we made it to the docks I was thankful to see that the flames were just coming from a pile of old crates that had been lit on fire by accident. But the thick black smoke was chocking me as we ran up to were the noise was coming from. When the smoke cleared and I could see once more, I saw around forty boys fighting all around us.

There were kids laying sprawled out on the docks with broken bones and some where even knocked out completely. I was happy to see that they were only using there fists and not any weapons but all of the blood was making me nauseous. I had to duck out of the way because a boy threw a crate and it busted on the wall beside my head. Between all of the commotion and violence I could think of nothing but finding Spot.

Race was beside me and I watched as a kid punched him straight across the face. I knew he was alright because he retaliated with a hard kick to the kids stomach. When I turned around the other way Jack was pounding on a kid twice his size. Knowing that I had to get higher up to see Spot, I climbed up the fire escape on the side of the Brooklyn Lodging House and looked out over the mass of boys.

It was hard to tell what was going on but from up there it looked like Brooklyn was winning. At first it seemed impossible to me that I would ever locate Spot out of all these people but just then my eyes caught sight of a shimmer of gold. When I looked closer I realized that it was the tip of Spots cane.

Blade and Spot were fighting fiercely on the edge of the dock. I cringed every time Spot was hit but he seemed to be holding his own. I wanted to run down and help him but I knew that there wasn't much I could do. I decided to wait till things calmed down a bit before I would make a move.

I ducked down on my knees and peered through the bars as I watched everything going on around me. Boots was fighting a kid directly below me and he didn't look like he was doing so well. I looked around and located a small wooden box. Wanting to help my friend, I grabbed it quickly and hung it over the fire escape. I aimed carefully and dropped it directly on the kids head, knocking him to the floor. Boots was startled and looked up, when he saw it was me he smiled.

"Thanks Doll," He yelled and then jumped back into the fight.

Quickly I looked up at the docks once more and was terrified at what I saw. Spot was being cornered near the edge by not just Blade but two other newsies from Queens. One of the boys charged at him but he quickly jumped to the side and I was thankful as I watched the kid loose his balance and fall into the river. Everyone I knew had told me that Spot was a decent fighter but I could tell by his movements that he was becoming tired and he still had two other kids to face.

Blade stood back casually and watched as the other newsie from Queen's began to fight Spot. I stared closely and tried to size up his competition. The kid was significantly taller than Spot was and he had dark brown hair and tan skin. His blue shirt was stained with blood from a previous fight and his trousers had a hole in the knee. But he was extremely thin and dangly, which was no comparison to Spot who was somewhat stockier in build.

They were moving around quickly and I was thankful that there wasn't many other boys fighting on the dock, so that I could see Spot clearly. Blade was still leaning up against a post to there right, staring maliciously at the fight going on before him. Deep down I knew what he was doing and I hated him for it. He was waiting for Spot to wear himself out before he finally decided to jump in. So that there would be no chance that Blade would lose.

The scraggily boy from Queen's got a good hit to Spot's face and I was sure that his nose was broken, even if I wasn't close enough to tell for sure. But that didn't seem to slow Spot down in the slightest bit. On the contrary, it seemed to make him even more enraged as he caught the kid off guard and sent him into the river to join his friend.

I silently cheered at Spots small victory but couldn't shake the frightened feeling that the worst was yet to come. I clenched my fists as I watched Blade stand up straight and walk over to Spot. They stood there for a few minutes just staring at each other. I had never seen such a look of hatred towards another person in all my life as I watched Spot glare at his former friend.

Then the staring contest ended as Blade got a good hit to the side of his head. Spot stumbled backwards but then took the advantage and tackled him. They both toppled down hard onto the dock and rolled rather close to the edge. Blade pinned Spot down by his shoulders and punched him in the face. I was so worried about Spot that I didn't even notice that I was clenching my hands together so tightly that my nails were digging into the palm of my hands.

Blade stood up as Spot rolled over and wiped blood onto his sleeve from his nose. It almost looked like he was about to leave but then I saw Blade reach into the back of his pants and pull out a shiny object. I couldn't tell exactly what it was until I squinted my eyes and looked a little closer. When I did finally see what it was that Blade was holding, I froze. It was a knife and Spot had no idea, as he stumbled to his feet.

Without a second thought, I ran down the metal stairs of the fire escape and into the crowed of boys. One kid tried to grab my arm but I yanked it free and continued running towards the dock. It was almost completely dark and the light from the fire was dying down. I cried out as I smacked into the chest of a boy and fell to the ground.

I didn't have time to think as I got back to my feet. But the kid got a firm grip on my forearm. I turned around and breathed a sigh of relief when I saw that it was Booker. He had a black eye and a small cut on the top of his forehead, but he seemed to be fairing pretty well. "Doll you need to get outta here!" He yelled. But I didn't listen I just continued to try and rip my arm free.

"Let me go!" I yelled. But he shook his head.

"Your gunna get hurt," he hollered, as he tried to pull me off to the side. I was gratefully that he was worrying about my safety but there wasn't anytime.

"Its Spot, I have to help him." I cried.

"I'm sure Spot is fine, Doll." Booker said. But then he saw the tears that escaped from my eyes. I didn't know if I was crying because I was scared or because I was afraid that I would be to late.

"No, Please let me go!" I begged. "Blade, he has a knife! I have to stop him." Booker's eyes grew wide when he realized what I was saying.

Suddenly Race appeared out of the crowed. "Whats goin on," he asked as he put his hands on his knees to catch his breath.

But I didn't have the time to speak as I yanked my arm free from Booker and ran through a small space that was left open between two groups of fighting boys. But Race was close behind me and just as Spot was in view, he grabbed me around the waist and held me back. Blade was walking towards him with the knife still hidden behind his back. Spot was finally standing but was so dizzy from loss of blood that he was wobbling on his feet.

Booker finally caught up with us and was standing next to Race. He looked quickly down at the knife in Blades hand and then back up at me. Then the next few things seemed to happen in slow motion. Blade lifted the knife and Spots eyes grew wide as he realized what was going to happen. But suddenly Booker ran forward and shoved Spot out of the way. I watched in horror as the knife dug deep into his chest.

"NO!" my scream was so loud that it pierced the night air and everyone around us stopped and stared. Race was in such shock that he loosened his grip on me and I ran to Bookers side.

"Why would you do that? Why would you jump in front of him?" I asked hysterically crying as I looked down at the knife in his chest and then looked over at Spot who was as pale as the sheets on my bed.

Booker looked up at me with tears in his eyes. He clenched his teeth together from the pain. "Because I love you." Booker managed to choke out. I stared down at him confused. What did his love for me have to do with saving Spot.

"Just…just hold on," I said brushing the hair out of his face. He was cold and pale as he shivered slightly. I grabbed his hand tightly as he started shaking and his breathing became sharp and raspy.

"Besides, he has more to live for." Booker chocked out and a tiny drop of blood ran down from his mouth. I shook my head as the tears in my eyes practically blinded me. I looked up as Jack came through and stopped in horror as he stared down at Booker. Then he turned around and ran to get the doctor.

"Stop talking like that. You…you'll be fine. Jack went to get help. Just hold on." I knew he was dying…I could see it in his eyes.

"Don't worry. I'll be happier were I'm going." He said sadly. I just continued to shake my head as I pressed my hand hard against his wound trying to stop the bleeding. Every newsie that was there that night just stood there horrified, watching the scene unfold. Spot was in a state of shock as he stood there staring down at us. But I didn't dare look up at him. Not after this, not ever again. 

"Your not going anywhere. Come on John don't give up on me now. Just be strong, you can make it." Booker started chocking and tears formed in his eyes.

"Tell me Hanna, what's here that's worth living for?" he asked. I took his hand in my own, trying to think of something to tell him that would make him fight harder.

"Did you not once say that I was everything to you. If nothing else, live for me. Please, you can't leave me here alone. Not like this, not now. Please I…I " I knew that I would lie just once if it meant his happiness. For I at least owed him that much. "…I love you."

The words felt odd as they left my mouth, but the look on his face was worth everything. But his smiled softened as he looked at me. He struggled to lean forward and kissed me softly on the cheek. Then to my surprise he then turned to look at Spot who stopped moving as they stared at each other. Then Booker nodded his head in a silent understanding. He turned back to me. "You don't love me, you never did." I shook my head frantically and opened my mouth, ready to protest. But he put a finger up to my mouth before I could speak. "But thanks for saying you do." John smiled brightly at me like he had the first time we met. But I just lowered my head and continued crying. He gently put a finger under my chin and lifted my head up. He wiped the tears from my cheeks then he groaned in pain and leaned his head back against my leg.

"No, Please…don't go. I need you, I always did. You can't leave me here… Please, don't leave me here alone." I was sobbing with my arms around him. Then I laid down next to him on the dock and placed my head onto his shoulder and cried. "Just hold on."

He leaned over and whispered in my ear. "You'll never be alone." Then before I realized what happened he closed his eyes and I knew he was gone.

I laid there sobbing hysterically until I felt a cold hand gently touch my shoulder. It was Racetrack "Ya gotta let em' go, Doll." I nodded my head and released my grip on his hand.

I sat up with a mixture of tears and Bookers blood, running down my cheeks. When I turned my head and looked behind me I saw the knife that Blade had used lying next to me. The next thing I knew I grabbed the knife and jumped to my feet.

"I'll kill you!" I screamed as I ran up to Blade, who was now being held by two Brooklyn boys. "I'll kill you!" I yelled as I placed the knife against Blades throat. The newsies just stood around shocked. They were afraid of what I might do.

"Da boy shouldn't of got in da way!" Blade replied but his voice was wavering.

"So that gives you the right to kill him! You heartless bastard!" I found myself screaming, shocked at the coldness in my own voice. " Besides John was more of a man than you will ever be."

"Oh, why because he saved someone's life. I saved you from drowning earlier this month. Remember that Dollface, so you gunna give me a kiss too."

"I can't believe you! If I remember correctly you were the one who knocked me into the river in the first place and you only saved me because Spot would of soaked ya if you didn't." I was angry but the tears continued to flow.

" Well look what honors gotten your little friend now." I pressed the knife into his neck and a speck of blood dripped down his skin.

"I'll kill you," I whispered venomously.

"Then do it already," I pushed the blade harder against the skin. My hands were shaking and I continued crying horribly. Suddenly I came to my senses and realized what I was doing. I dropped the knife to the dock and fell down, crying into my hands. No one said anything. A few kids from Brooklyn come and took Blade away as I just sat there speechless. Spot finally came to his senses and walked over. I didn't realized it was him until he placed a hand on my shoulder. I smacked it away quickly and backed up.

"Don't you touch me!" I screamed. "It's your fault he's dead!" This hurt Spot but he knew he deserved it.

"I…I'm sorry," Spot said as he reached out a hand to me again. But I smacked that away to.

"It's too late now. You can say your sorry all you want, Spot Conlon. But sorry isn't going to bring him back." I started crying even harder, if it was even possible. "I'm sorry…I'm sorry. Your apologies don't mean anything anymore. Johns dead and its all because you couldn't suck up your dammed pride for one second and say _I'm sorry _in the first place."

"I know, sorry wont bring him back. I didn't mean for dis whole thing ta happen. I hadn't meant ta get Blade upset. I know its my fault that Bookers dead and I regret that more than ya know. But ya, ya just made me so angry." Spot shook his head and pounded his fist against the wood.

"I…I was the reason you were so angry?" I asked confused. Spot nods his head.

"After we had dat fight an all, ya just up en' left," but Spot stopped when he saw that I wasn't listening anymore. I was to busy thinking about everything that had happened. It was my fault.

"I was the reason…I was the reason." I said to myself as I looked over at Booker. "It's my fault he's dead. I killed him!"

"No," Spot shook his head and went to grab my arm once more but I jumped to my feet.

"He loved me and I killed him!"

" Listen Doll, Ya didn't kill nobody," Racetrack said who was standing beside me now.

But I didn't listen. I was in a state of shock and I suddenly became expressionless. I stopped crying and just looked at Booker. "I'm going to leave now."

"Where ya think ya goin?" Race asked confused.

" I'm going back to the Lodging House. I'm getting my stuff and then I'm leaving." I spoke like there was nothing left of my emotions. All the Manhattan boys standing around began to protest but I put up a hand to stop them. "I've done nothing but cause you more problems than you need. There is nothing left for me here."

"We aint gunna just let ya walk away from dis. We's all sad dat Booker got killed. But ya can't let dat ruin ya life." Spot practically yelled.

"What life?" I asked. "I had a life once, but it died just like everything else that I had ever cared about. Just let me go."

"No," Race said sternly.

"Why not?" I asked. I knew in my heart that there was not reason for me to stay and that it didn't matter what Race said. I no longer belonged here…and I don't think I ever did.

"Because we care about ya, dats why."

"Do you think I'm deaf or something. No, maybe just so stupid that I can't hear you guys talking. I know what ya say about me when I'm not around. You wouldn't believe the stuff that's made its way through the floor boards of my room at night when you think I'm sleeping or the stuff you say when your drunk. You don't care about me, you just care about what I can give you!" Race looked like I had just slapped him in the face with a hot iron. I started crying some more and ran away into the darkness. Hoping with all my heart that they would just let me go.

**Thank you:**

C.M. Higgins- Well I couldn't wait any longer and decided to update today. I am really sick and needed something to cheer me up. I am so glad I have you to read my chapters before I post them. Just because I like someone's opinion first. You were almost correct on what you guessed but not perfect. Lol Well thanks for all of your help and I will talk to ya later.

Katherine- Thank you so much, you are so sweet! I am really glad that you like my story. It means a lot to me and my reviews are what keeps me writing. I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Splashey- I always look forward to your reviews. You are always so encouraging. I know I normally update on Friday but I had to update today. I am really sick and my reviewer's always make me feel better. I can't wait to see what you think of this chapter. Yeah I know it was a shock to find out that Hanna might be leaving. But hey, I love putting twists in my story. I cant tell you what's gunna happen (no matter how much I want to) so just keep reading and let me know what you think.

Swimade333- Well don't worry, you don't have to make it till Friday. I decided to update two days early. I know its breaking my system but I couldn't keep you guys waiting any longer. You have been such wonder reviewers and you guys have helped me continue writing this. I never would have finished it if it wasn't for all of my reviewers. So I had to update. I can't wait to see what you think!

Clover- Well you don't have to worry about me not updating for awhile, because here is the next chapter. I had to update, I was so excited and I felt really bad about leaving you guys with a cliffhanger last time. I just couldn't post all of this into one chapter. I hope that you like this chapter, even though its really sad. Let me know what you think as soon as possible.

Joker is Poker with a J- Well Surprise! Here is an update, two day's earlier than expected. I am so sorry for leaving you a cliffhanger in the last chapter. It just makes more suspense for this one. Besides I was to excited about this chapter, to wait any longer. Please let me know what you think and be honest. Thanks so much!

Koodles4You- Hey, sorry for making you upset. Yeah I am getting a little sad to about the end of the story. Anyway here is the next chapter and its two days early. I had to update. I felt so guilty about leaving you guys hanging in the last chapter. I am so happy that you love my story that much. It really does mean a lot to me. I don't know how many times I would have stopped if it wasn't for my reviewer's. Well I hope you liked this chapter, even though its kinda sad. Let me know what you think as soon as possible!

The Good Girl- Well I guess your Update Dance, worked because I decided to update on Wednesday instead of Friday. I couldn't wait any longer to post. I have to see what you guys think of this chapter. I felt bad about leaving you guys hanging. Like I said before, your reviews always make me so happy! I love them! They are what keeps me writing.

truecalifornian- Well you didn't have to wait a week for me to update. I decided to be nice and update early, since all of my reviewer's have been so wonderful. This chapter was so hard to write but I managed to get through it. I was so excited that I couldn't wait till Friday. I hope you enjoyed it even though its kinda depressing.

Smiley Cad- Your reviews always make me happy! You always seem to have something nice to say. I am really glad that you liked the last chapter. I was so excited about this chapter that I couldn't wait any longer to post it. Normally it takes me a week to write a chapter, that's why I post on Fridays. But I wrote this one in a day and a half and so I had to update early. I hope you enjoy it.

Dimonah Tralon- Well, here is the next chapter! I felt so bad for leaving a cliffhanger that I decided to surprise people and update a couple of days early. Well this chapter was intense to write, so I hope you enjoyed it.

Luv ya all,

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BlackWiltedRose


	29. Final Goodbye

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Hey everyone! I am so so so sorry for not updating sooner. My computer broke for a week and a half. Then my teachers packed me with school work. I am not doing so good in school so I have to really concentrate. This is the longest chapter I have written so far. There are probably a lot of mistakes, but I wanted to get it up as soon as possible. There are only two more chapters left! Please don't be angry at me for making you wait so long, I didn't have a choice. Please still review and let me know what you think! Its your reviews that kept me writing.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

After running off into the darkness, I found myself wondering around the streets of Brooklyn with not a clue as to where I was going. I could hear the soft patter of footsteps behind me and I knew that someone was keeping track of my whereabouts. But as long as they didn't try and stop me, I was fine.

The wind began to blow and up until then I hadn't noticed the bitter temperature outside. I wrapped my arms around my chest to keep warm and shivered slightly. I was in such a terrible state of mind that I could hardly see through all my tears. Sometimes it completely blinded my vision and I would have to stop for a moment to regain my composure. But I would continue walking again and so would the footsteps behind me. I would question on whether or not to turn around and see who it was. But then I decided that I would be best at the moment to just pretend that whoever it was, didn't exist. I needed to be alone…well as alone as I could be.

I must have been walking around the streets for hours by the time that I made it to the Brooklyn bridge. I didn't want to go back to the Lodging House just then so I sat down on a bench outside of an old bakery once I made it into Manhattan. I didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't know how to think or to act. No matter what I did I couldn't get the sight of Booker out of my head. He was dead…and I couldn't help but blame myself. Even though in the back of my mind, I knew that it wasn't my fault at all. Nor was it anybody else's fault but Blades and I felt highly guilty about screaming at Spot on the docks. But I needed to scream…to yell….to cry and he was just there for me to take it out on.

I laid down with my back against the cold wood of the bench and stretched out. I pulled the cotton skirt of my dress beneath me and curled up. I don't know how long I just laid there sobbing but the next thing I knew I was waking up in my bed. It was early morning as yellow rays of sunlight began to shine through the window. But not enough to do anything but cast slight shadows off of the furniture. I was laying on my right side and rolled over onto my back. The dress I had been wearing the night before was still on and my face was damp from the many times I had woken up crying during the night. It didn't occur to me then that someone had carried me back to the Lodging House.

Staring at the ceiling, I sighed deeply. What happens now? How could somebody loose so many people that they love and still go on? Even though it seemed like much longer, I realized now that my parents had only been gone for close to two months and now Booker was dead. I felt guilty that while he was alive, I couldn't return his love… but he still meant the world to me. He had believed in me when everybody else had questioned my judgment. No matter how stupid I acted or vain I decided to be, he wouldn't criticize my antics but help me to understand why what I was doing was wrong.

Everybody needs someone to just sit down and talk to. I would have been able to say that Racetrack was just as good of a friend. But I looked to him for different reasons. Race was my older brother…my confidant. He was the one person who would keep me in line and tell me what was right and wrong. But Booker would just sit there and listen…without making comments and he would truly hear what I was saying. He wouldn't judge me by the small things that I did wrong, but he would rather look at the whole of who I was inside. So I guess you could say that there where three men in my life who I cared more about than anything. Racetrack was my brother, Booker was my friend and Spot was…

Spot, I had been so caught up with myself that I hadn't even considered what was happening with him. The harder I tried, the more vivid the picture of Spots face appeared in my head. I had never seen such horror in his eyes when Booker shoved him out of the way and Spot watched as the knife dug deep into his friends chest. I can't even imagine what it would feel like to have someone die for you. To know in your mind that it should have been you that was being buried in the ground. But instead you have to watch as someone else takes your fate.

In a way I hoped that it was all a dream. That I would walk out the bedroom door and nothing would have ever happened. But it was useless to even think such a thing. I no longer believed in fairy tales and the miracles that my mother had taught me when I was a little girl. I wasn't a child any longer and the moment my parents died, I had realized this. Living in a dream world only caused me more pain than I needed. Building my hopes up, only to smash them down again. In my life…happily ever after, just wasn't an option.

I closed my eyes for a second and them opened them up once more, but nothing had changed. I was still staring at the wood ceiling in my room. The same one that I had looked at for weeks. I groaned and rolled onto my opposite side. But when my eyes cleared I saw a bundle, laying in my chair. At first I didn't realize what I was looking at. But then it came to me. It wasn't a bundle but a person. I couldn't tell who it was at first but when the mysterious figure opened its eyes, I knew.

There was no doubt in my mind that the boy in my room, was Spot Conlon. I could have recognized those eyes anywhere. But for some odd reason, I wasn't startled at the fact that he was here. In a way, I felt kind of relieved. Because I was nowhere ready to face anybody else. I don't think I would ever be able to look those boys in the eyes again. In my opinion the eyes were the window to the soul and I was scared to death to see what they thought of me now.

Most people say that they don't care what others think. But deep down, social acceptance is what everybody longs for. There is always somebody that you want to fit in with or to impress. Even if its just one person…nobody likes to be hated. Now don't get me wrong, there are those people out there who love to be independent and alone. But even they have there weaknesses. Because living among the lower class of society has shown me in the worst way that nobody's invincible.

Spot and I just sat there staring at each other for close to five minutes. I didn't know what to say to him. All of my anger and built up frustration disappeared when I saw the look of pain in his eyes. He always did have a way of stealing the words out of my mouth.

"Hey," I said softly. Looking up at him, with my face laying flat on the pillow.

"Hi," he replied. His voice was low and raspy from sleep. I knew that Spot didn't know what to say either. It was a hard and uncomfortable situation to be in. Even with somebody that I felt so calm with. There was another short pause and then he spoke once more. "Are you alright?"

I was slightly surprised at his concern, but I nodded my head. "Yes," I said slowly. I didn't want to say anything more than I had to, incase I would break down into tears again. Then I stared firmly into his eyes once more. "Are you?"

He nodded his head in reply, as I had done. But just by looking at him I knew that he was lying. Yet it wasn't in his character, even when he was so weak, to admit that he was hurting. So I refused to push the subject any longer and sat up in my bed. My appearance must have looked atrocious. But Spot had seen me far worse that this and I was sure that he didn't care.

All I wanted was to break down whatever was holding us back and pour my heart out to Spot. To explain how sorry I was for hurting him and to tell him that no matter what I did I had never stopped loving him. But I couldn't…because I let fear get in the way. Yet as I sat there staring at Spot, I realized that this is what Booker wanted. He had died so that we could be together. But could it ever be the same, or would I even want to go back to how it was before. All I knew was that to get answers I would have to ask Spot…I needed to know.

Yet before I could open my mouth, Spot spoke. "I'm sorry," he said.

I stared at him bewildered…it was only the second time in my life that I had ever heard Spot Conlon apologize. "What?" I couldn't even understand what he was apologizing for.

"I'm sorry for screaming at ya and not listening ta what ya had ta say. I knew dat ya didn't kiss Booker but I was just so angry dat I wasn't thinking properly. I was gunna apologize to ya in da morning but ya left before I had da chance. I knew dat I messed up big time but I couldn't bring myself ta go and see ya in Manhattan." Spot spoke so fast that it took me a few minutes to comprehend everything. Then I looked up at him sternly.

"It wasn't your fault. I should have made it clear to Booker earlier that I didn't like him as anything more than a friend. I shouldn't have left, I should have talked to you. But you scare me when your angry, Spot. Besides I was to upset to face you."

"I tink' dat it was both of our faults." Spot replied.

I nodded my head and then looked at the ground. Spot stood up off the chair and walked over to sit down next to me. I looked up and stared into his eyes. It had been so long since he had looked at me with anything but anger in his eyes. That I had forgotten what it had felt like to see him stare at me so longingly. I knew that he needed me as much as I needed him and that somehow gave me comfort.

" I never stopped loving you Spot," I replied softly as I leaned my head against his chest. He placed his one hand on my back and ran the other one through my hair.

"I know," he said and that's all I needed. I didn't expect him to say that he loved me back. I didn't need him too because I knew by his actions, just how he felt about me. I always did.

"What happens now?" I asked him. I needed answers, I needed someone to tell me what to do. I was tired of being on my own. I couldn't take making any more decisions by myself. Because everyone that I made, somehow turned out wrong. I wanted Spot to tell me that everything was alright. That all that mattered was that we were together. But life wasn't as simple as that.

"I don't know, Dollface." he said softly. But I knew what would happen. Spot would leave and go back to Brooklyn. Everybody would be sad about Booker for awhile but then things would just go back to how they had always been. The next day the distribution bell would ring and all of the newsies would line the streets to get there papers. It was the way that things worked. When you live on the streets, people die and get locked up all the time. You just go on with life like nothing happened. But I don't think I could do that. Maybe that was my problem…that I cared to deeply about things.

I wanted to be with Spot more than anything, but no matter how hard we tried it never turned out ok…and I don't think it ever would. There was just to many things standing in the way. So I finally made my decision. I looked up into Spot eyes and I knew that he understood. "Your leaving aren't ya?"

I sat up straight and got to my feet. Walking over to the old wooden dresser I placed my hands upon the top and stared at my reflection. If I hadn't been forced to watch the slow progression, I wouldn't have been able to recognize myself. Was this what I was destined to become. I sighed and turned to Spot. "I think its for the best."

He looked down at the ground and I knew he couldn't debate with me. "But…we could make it work. I'm sure of it."

I turned around and looked at him. "This city's killing me Spot. I'm nothing here. I have no future if I stay. You…I know you will go somewhere in life, your to stubborn not to. But its not the same for me, I don't have a chance."

"What about da money you have in da bank?" he asked hopefully. As if that was enough reason to convince me.

"If I stay here, I highly doubt that I will even make it to my twenty-first birthday." I replied sorrowfully. "I only have one good reason why I shouldn't go…and that's you."

I knew that this hit him hard. Because if he truly cared about me, he wouldn't want to be the reason that I decided not to go. But I could see Spot battling with himself on what he was going to say. I knew in my heart that if he would have asked me to stay…I would have thrown all my hopes of a better life, out the window. But he didn't speak, he just lowered his eyes to the ground. "I understand," he said sadly.

I walked over to him and kneeled down on the floor, taking his hands in my own. Once again, my green eyes met with his blue one's. "If I had any choice, I would be with you forever. I love you so much and I will never forget everything that you have given me."

"I didn't give ya nothin," He replied.

"You gave me everything," I said sternly. "You saved me from falling apart and you were always there when I needed you the most. You helped me figure out how to care about people again. You showed me how to be companionate and caring towards others when I had given up hope. You helped me live."

"I didn't do all dat," Spot said as he got to his feet. I stood up also so that we were facing each other.

To his surprise, I leaned forward and kissed him softly. When I pulled away I whispered. "You did more…"

We were so in love at that moment that you never would have guessed that we had been fighting the day before. But that was the way that we had always been. I don't think I would know what to do if we didn't have our arguments. I truly believe that if we were completely the same we would get bored with each other. When I'm with Spot I never know what could happen. The main reason why I was attracted to him in the first place was because he was something new and exciting.

"So when ya leavin?" He asked sitting back down in the chair.

"In two days," I said softly. Spots eyes grew wide.

"Why so soon!" I walked over and pulled the suitcase out from beside the dresser and opened it up on the bed.

"Because I am going to live with Olivia at her aunts house in Virginia. It's a two day ride and she wants us to arrive a few weeks before the next school year starts in order to help her get the house together." I replied as I began piling some of my dresses into the suitcase.

I refused to look up at Spots face because I already knew the look that he was giving me. But he just sighed in understanding and relaxed in the chair. I think he understood that he had no choice but to let me go. No matter how hard it was going to be, it was the only hope I had left of living a normal life. If any of the other boys had the same opportunity they would take it without question, so why didn't I have the same right.

For a few minutes Spot sat there in silence and I continued scurrying around the room trying to pack my stuff. We heard the noise of the boys moving around outside my bedroom door and if it wasn't just my imagination, they were no where near as rambunctious as they normally are…today was different. I pulled out my dresser drawer and moved some stuff around. Looking for any small objects that I might of missed. When suddenly I came upon the shattered picture of my mother and the folded up note that my _brother_ had sent me.

I hadn't seen that note since a couple of weeks ago when it was first given to me. I put it away and never looked at it since. There was so much going on that the thought of visiting my old house and meeting this man, had completely slipped my mind. I had told myself many times before that I should at least consider going to visit my brother. So I sat down on the bed and re-read the note.

I could still feel Spot staring at me from the chair but I ignored him. It didn't take me very long to finally come up with a decision. I would for once, put my aggressions aside and go to see my house for the last time before I leave. I needed some kind of closure in my life and somehow I realized that this would be the beginning. Knowing that I didn't have much time, I folded up the note and placed it into my suitcase. Turning around Spot stood up in concern.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"I have somewhere I need to go," I replied quickly.

"Where?" Spot asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Home," That was all I said. "Now could you please step outside while I get changed."

I knew that it was an odd question to ask, considering our past relationship. But I didn't feel comfortable with him at the moment, at least not enough to change in front of him. Spot wasn't in the mood to argue so he nodded his head in agreement and walked out of the room.

I rummaged through my bag and pulled out one of the last decent clean dresses that I had. With some difficulty I finally managed to snap the corset and pull the dress up. It hung loosely on my body because of all the weight I lost. But I found a matching ribbon that I tied around my waist, making it look tighter than it was.

I walked over to the mirror and fixed my hair as best as I could, considering the fact that I hadn't brushed it properly, in a few days. Once I was finished, I held my breath and opened the door. I immediately looked at the ground and walked very fast towards the door. I made no eye contact with anybody as I made my way downstairs. They were probably wondering where I was going, but I really didn't care. For some odd reason, I could no longer look them in the face. I could hear Spot follow me down the stairs and out onto the street. He didn't say anything for a few blocks until he could hold it in no longer.

"Where exactly are ya going?" he asked curiously.

"To my old house," I replied but did not stop walking.

"Why are ya going there?"

"To meet my brother," I said staunchly. Even though I was telling the truth, it was only half of the reason. I needed to say goodbye. Because ever since the day my parents died, I had started running and I haven't stopped since. I didn't know exactly what I was running from, but I was finally slowing down and realizing that if I didn't do something to change my direction I would eventually run out of places to go.

My house was not far from my old school and it didn't take long before Spot and I reached what had used to be my home. I remembered the black iron fence that lined the yard where the grass was always green, unless glittering white with snow. I remembered how my father would demand that there be no vines upon this fence and hired extra gardeners just incase.

I walked forward and pressed upon the gate, watching as it opened with a loud creak. I put a note in my head, reminding myself to speak to my brother about oiling the hinges, it had been something that my mother always used to yell at my father about fixing. There were so many memories that I had shared with this house and it almost felt like I had traveled back in time, even for just a moment.

We walked up the stone pathway that was lined with yellow and pink rose bushes. I had planted one every year since my sixteenth birthday. I stared around closely, trying to point out anything that had changed. But there was nothing drastic that caught my eye.

I began wondering what my brother would be like and if he would have any resemblance to my father. We did not share the same mother, yet I still felt somehow connected to this stranger. There remained a slight bit of resentment in my heart, that he should have this house and I should not. But I decided that for only a day, I would put this behind me. I knew that it would have made my father proud.

Spot and I made it up onto the porch and I could tell that he was becoming uncomfortable. It was the same look that Racetrack had given me when he had taken me back to the school before. I was waiting for Spot to ask to leave, but it never came. My hand was shaking as I reached up and knocked on the door. It took a few minutes before a young dark haired maid opened it. I recognized her immediately and wondered if she did the same. It took her a few minutes before her eyes grew wide, I knew my appearance had changed drastically. "Young Miss. Grimmuald!" She exclaimed.

"How are you Clarice, it feels like ages since I saw you last." I replied as I reached in and hugged her tightly.

I knew she was uncomfortable because I had never been permitted to hug the hired help before. But I was so incredible happy to see a familiar face that I could hardly contain myself. Yet I think she understood and embraced me all the same. When we finally broke apart I smiled at her brightly. "I am sorry Miss but Mr. Grimmuald isn't here at the moment. If you would like to see him I suggest coming back at another time." Clarice replied. I was slightly disappointed that he wasn't there, but it didn't really faze me a bit.

"Actually I am here to see the house. I will be leaving for Virginia in two days and I just wanted to say goodbye." I replied. I blushed slightly, feeling rather odd for admitting my secret.

"Oh yes, I am sure that would be alright. They will not be home for many hours." In a way it felt like breaking an entering, considering I didn't have the approval of those that now owned the house. But as far as I was concerned, this would always and forever be my parents home.

Clarice moved to the side and at once I was bombarded by the familiar faces of all of the other maids. They told me there sympathies and how everything was going since my parents were gone. The cook, an old man named Gerald made me a glass of hot coco and I told them how I had been. They looked Spot over and greeted him with warm smiles. I think this made him feel slightly more comfortable.

I decided to leave him in the kitchen to listen to horrifying stories of when I was a child. Spot was finding them rather entertaining so I figured it was a good time to go off on my own. I walked from room to room and my brother had been correct at the notion that they hadn't changed a thing. There were a few trinkets that were out of place or had been brought in. But other than that, they had kept it relatively the same. Even all of the bedrooms were the same and I went into everyone but my own. I sat for a few minutes on my parents old bed, staring at the painting of the purple house that overlooked the sea. I longed for nothing more than to be in that painting, rather than here in a house haunted by the memory of my past.

Finally I made it downstairs and Spot walked with me out into the back yard. I was thrilled to see that the garden my father had built me, remained just had beautiful as it had always been. I walked over and sat down on the fountain of an angel that was placed in the middle. Spot sat down next to me and for once I was thankful for the company. I didn't know if I could handle being alone.

"Are you alright?" he asked.

I didn't speak, but just looked at my reflection in the water. How had things become so difficult. Why couldn't I go back to when I was four? When nothing else mattered but what dress I was going to wear the next day. I watched as a tear slid from my cheek and created a flow of ripples in the water. I stared up at the sky and then turned my attention to the weeping willow tree that my mother loved so dearly, that was casting shade upon us.

Spot watched me as I stood up off the cement fountain and walked over to the bottom of the tree. I knelt down on my hands and knee's and looked around. Before long I found an old branch that had just recently fallen off. Furiously I began to dig a deep hole in the earth. When I was finished I reached into a small hand bag that I had been carrying and pulled out the picture of my mother.

I stared at her beautiful face and for the first time in days, I smiled. It suddenly became clear to me that this is what she would want. She wouldn't be able to stand, living my life the way I have. My mother always told me that the most important thing in life was being happy. She wouldn't want me holding on to things in the past that would hurt me and bring me pain. So with great care I placed the picture in the hole and covered it up with fresh dirt. This was my mothers house and now a part of her would forever be here beneath the earth she loved so much. This was my final goodbye.


	30. Looking Back

Hey!!! Here is the next chapter. I am sorry that it has been taking me so long to update. But like I told you guys before, school is killing me. I never have time to do anything during the week and on the weekends I have been really busy. But I finally got the chapter done and I hope you enjoy it. I am sorry that I haven't been responding to my reviews, its just that I wanted to get my chapters up as soon as possible. I will have the last chapter of this story up very soon. Half of it is already written. Please please, continue reviewing…they are what keeps me writing. You guys are wonderful! Thank you so much!

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from the Newsies movie. I wish I did, but I sadly don't. So I will just have to stick with my character, Hanna. Who belongs entirely to me.

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Chapter Twenty-Nine

Spot and I, sat in the beautiful backyard of my old house for another hour before I finally decided that it was time to go. My brother had yet to return and I didn't feel the need to wait any longer. There was something in my heart telling me that there are some things that should just be left behind. I had never known my brother before and hence, there was no need to know him now.

Yet I could not hide the disappointment, as we began to walk back to the Lodging House. Most of the time that we had spent at my house, neither Spot nor I had spoken but a few words to each other. I think it was because Spot knew that I would have preferred to be alone, so he stayed as quiet as possible. But now the silence was becoming uncomfortable and we both knew it.

"So dat' was your house?" he asked.

"Yeah, I grew up there. But that was actually only our summer home. Our real house was a half an ride from here. It was a lot bigger, because we spent most of the winter there." I replied casually.

"Ya had a good life, Doll." He said and it almost felt like he was saying it to himself.

"Yeah, I guess I did." I responded as we continued walking down the street. The sun had risen completely in the sky and I could tell that it was noon. The temperature would have been comfortable if the wind wasn't blowing so hard. But it was just the normal sign that summer was going to be coming to an end very shortly.

Just then we passed Tibby's Restaurant and I pulled on Spot's sleeve to get his attention. "Let's stop and get something to eat. I have a little bit of money left, so I will pay for you." He looked hesitant at first but he followed me anyway. Everybody knew that Spot didn't like to take charity from anybody. But he knew that I wasn't giving him charity, I was just doing it because I wanted to.

When we walked in, I noticed a small group of newsies sitting in the far back corner, they looked up at us but then went back to eating. It was just a bunch of the younger kids who had never paid attention to much of anything really. The older boys always thought it best to keep the younger kids out of all the problems. It helped them to have a civil mind when they got older. Because when you were raised with violence and hardships you turned out like Spot. We walked over and sat in a booth by the opposite wall. There wasn't many customers today, so a waitress came over immediately and took our orders. When she left, I turned to him.

"How come you never talk about your life?" I asked. "You know everything about me, yet I barely know anything about you." Spot looked up from the table and shrugged his shoulders.

"Because I don't like ta talk about myself. Besides I don't tink' its anybody's business but mine." I nodded my head. I knew not to push Spot into doing something that he didn't want to do, so I asked no more questions about his past.

Spot looked back down to the table and I continued to stare at him. I had been too busy thinking about my own problems that I wasn't really focusing on his. When I looked closer at his face I could just see the hint of a bruise forming on his cheek. That somehow made me remember everything that had happened the night before and I was slowly beginning to see how all of this had changed Spot.

I could see that he was hurting and it killed me to know that there was nothing I could do to stop it. But I also believed that this was the reason that the rest of the newsies had decided to give us some space. They knew that we would either deal with our grief alone, or deal with it together but we didn't have the strength to be around anybody else.

Spot could feel me starring at him and he looked up to meet my eyes. "Are you sure your alright?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine Doll," he replied coolly. I don't know why I even asked in the first place. I knew what his answer would be. I guess had I just hoped that he would decide to open up and tell me what he was thinking.

The waitress came back with our food soon after that. I had ordered a bagel with blueberry jam and Spot got some toast. We ate our food in silence, until I could take it no longer. I knew that he was blaming himself for Booker's death and I just couldn't let him continue.

"It wasn't your fault," I finally said. He looked up startled as I disrupted the silence. Then his eyes narrowed in anger.

"I don't wanna talk about it." Spot replied as he took a bite of his toast.

"But you need to realize that it wasn't your fault." I said again. I had to make sure that he understood.

"I said dat I don't wanna talk about it!" He yelled.

I stood up in anger and slammed my hands down on the table. A few of the other people in the restaurant looked over at us startled. But I didn't even notice as I glared at Spot Conlon. "Well it doesn't matter what you want anymore! Because its what you need! You can't keep blaming yourself for something that you had no control over."

To my surprise Spot didn't yell, he just sat there. "I could have stopped it."

I sat back down in my seat. " Tell me how you could have stopped him?"

Spot shrugged his shoulders. "I dunno, I just could have."

I sighed in disbelief. "Why do you always have to be so stubborn? There was no way to stop him, Spot. Booker made up his own mind. You have to realize that your not the only one who's hurting. Don't you think that I spend every waking moment thinking about how I could have stopped him, or try and find some way to blame myself for what he did? But you can't live like that! I found out first hand, when my parents died. I thought that maybe if I had been home and not at that stupid school, I would have found someway to prevent the fire, to save them. Even though I knew in mind that even if I had been there, I probably would have died myself. For the longest time, I couldn't let go of the fact that it wasn't my fault. Don't do that to yourself Spot, your smarter than that."

Spot looked up at me and I could once again see the pain in his eyes. "What makes ya think dat I'm smarter dan dat?"

"Because you made it this far without breaking." I reached my arm across the table and took his hand in my own. He continued to stare at me, without blinking. "Be the strong person that I know you are, Spot. Believe me when I tell say that you had no control over what Booker did…it wasn't your fault."

His gaze left my own and he starred down at the wooden table. Then he nodded his head and let go of my hand, as he leaned back against the bench. "I know."

I smiled softly at the fact that I had finally gotten through to him. "Alright, well lets get back to the Lodging House. We have been gone for hours and I don't want the boys to worry."

Spot laughed and I was happy to see him smile again. "Yeah, dey probably tink' we killed each other or somethin." I paid the bill and we left Tibby's.

We walked beside each other in silence, but somewhere along the way Spot had taken my hand in his own. It felt so perfect and I wished that I could have spent every second of my life doing just that. It was such a simple moment, yet I would stand to cherish it for the rest of my life. I dreamed that I could stay there forever, just walking down the street with the boy that I cared so deeply for, in a city that I both loved and hated with all my heart.

When we made it back to the Lodging House, I was startled to see that most of the boys were back so soon from selling. Actually I had the feeling that they didn't go at all. I knew that my hand must have tensed up because Spot looked over at me concerned. "What's wrong, Dollface?" Spot asked.

"Nothing," I replied as I started making my way up the stairs, that led into the bunkroom. Spot was behind me and I knew that I couldn't stop. But I just wasn't ready to face any of them. I could barely deal with my own pain, let alone see what the death of a friend could do to the rest of the newsies. Even the boys who never knew Booker, couldn't have came out of something so intense, without being somehow effected.

I had told Spot so many times before, not to blame himself for Bookers death and yet I could not stop blaming myself. I just figured that if I had said it out loud enough, somehow I would come to believe it. But one thought kept repeating over and over in my mind. I was the reason that Booker stopped Spot from being stabbed. If I hadn't loved him so much then Booker may have still been alive. But there was no good outcome to this situation because no matter what choice I made somebody would die. I just couldn't understand how love could kill something so wonderful.

I opened the door to the bunk room and I felt Spot's hand gently press on my back. This gave me some comfort as I walked into the room. For the first time since what happened, I stopped and starred my friends in the eyes. Spot walked into the room behind me and shut the door. We stood there for a few moments and nobody said a word. Deciding that I could not longer take the pressure, I turned around and walked towards the door to my room. But I stopped when Race spoke. "Hey, Doll. Dere is dis fair goin on tonight in da park and we were all wonderin if ya might wanna come?"

I didn't look at them as I continued towards my room. "Maybe, if I finish packing." That was when I realized that I hadn't told them that I was leaving yet.

I reached out to grab the doorknob but Jack quickly pulled it shut again. "What do ya mean, packing?" He asked and the rest of the boys crowded around.

I got the horrible feeling that I was being backed up into a corner and I looked over as Spot for an escape. I needed for him to find someway to get me out of the terrifying situation that I had so clumsily gotten myself into to. But I knew that there was no way to get away from it, so I stood strong and starred Jack in the eyes. "I'm leaving," I replied staunchly.

"Where are ya goin?" Racetrack jumped in. He looked both confused and hurt.

"I'm going to live with Olivia and her aunt in Virginia." The boys eyes grew wide in disbelief.

"But ya can't leave," Race practically yelled.

I turned and looked at him sadly. Ever since the first day we met in Tibby's, he had been nothing but a loyal friend to me. Race had been more like family than my own parents had. He kept me out of trouble and had shown me how to survive on my own. Even when I made him angry or disappointed him, he had always forgiven me. I knew that I had taken his friendship for granted and the guilt was more than I could bare. "I have to," I replied sadly. Then I turned around and walked into my room.

The suitcase was still on my bed from when I had started packing that morning, and I continued with where I had left off. My back was to the open door and I could feel there stares boring into my back. I got the uneasy feeling that they could see right through me. That no matter how good I was at hiding my pain, they knew that I was only pretending. The same way that I could see into Spot's eyes and tell that he was hurting.

Suddenly I realized that tears were once again falling from my eyes and that I was no longer folding the clothes nicely, I was shoving them into the bag. That just goes to show you how hardship and suffering can change even the most strong willed people of the world. For I had once been so happy and ignorant to the problems of society, that I would have annoyed people with my joyfulness just by standing there. I had never cried for any other reason than a clumsy scrap on the knee. Now I could do nothing but cry tears of death and sorrow.

I continued shoving the clothes into my bag until Spot reached over and grabbed my wrist. I was thankful to see that he had shut the door behind me. I didn't want an audience at the moment, watching me have another break down. To my surprise, he wrapped his arms around me and I cried into his shoulder. I know that sometimes it's hard to see it, but I was only sixteen years old. Even though I was halfway to being considered an adult, I was still a child in many ways. But I knew now, that I had lost my childhood and if I didn't take care of myself, nobody would.

I pulled away from Spot and looked into his eyes. "Thank you," I said softly. Then I leaned forward and kissed him softly.

He just smiled and put his hand on my back. "Well dat's what I'm here for." Spot ushered me over and sat me down in the chair. "Now, I know dat ya don't want ta spend the last day that you are here…sittin around in ya room."

I glared at him, but after a few minutes I shook my head. "No."

"Then get dressed, because its startin ta get dark and you are comin to da fair wit us." Spot said this more like a command and I was about to protest but he left the room before I had the chance.

Growling to myself, I got to my feet and walked over to the bag that I had so forcefully packed and pulled out a light blue dress. It didn't take me very long to get it on and I fixed my hair quickly in the mirror. After tying my shoes, I stood up and walked over to the door. I took a quick breath and walked out into the bunk room.

All of the boys were rushing around, clothes laid sprawled all over the floor and to my surprise, Racetrack walked over and put his arm around my shoulders. " I'm glad ya decided ta come, Dollface. It wouldn't be da same wit'outcha."

"No problem, Race." I said calmly.

Soon all of the boys were finished getting ready and we headed out the door. But I made sure to pay Kloppman before we left. It was a beautiful night and the sky was filled with stars. Well at least with as many as you can see from a big city such as New York. The park wasn't very far from the Lodging House and we made it there in close to fifteen minutes.

I could hear the music from the live band, playing more than two blocks away. Lamps were lining the streets, giving us light to see and tables were set up all over the place. There were stands filled with food and games set up, where you could win small prizes. I smiled, as I watched a group of little kids pull on there mothers dress, begging her to let them play some more games.

Spot led us over to an empty table and I sat down next to him. Most of the boys ran off on there own and all that was left were Spot, Crutchy, Race and I. None of us really had that much money to spend, but we were having fun just sitting there. Mush decided to return a little later and to my surprise, he had Olivia with him. We hugged in greeting and Spot decided to stand and let her sit beside me.

"How are you, Hanna?" she asked politely.

"I'm just fine," I replied as I began to join in a game of poker that Race started.

For some reason, the whole atmosphere of the situation seemed to make all of my problems disappear and I felt happy for the first time in weeks. I looked around at all of my friends and smiled. This made me remember all of the good times that we shared over the past two months. Like all of the times when Racetrack and I would stay up late and play poker in the bunk room. Sometimes the sun would start to rise and Jack would wake up and yell at us to get some sleep.

I remember when Mush took me on a tour of the city and showed me everything that I had never seen before. It was such a wonderful thing for me to watch other people go on with there lives. Because I had never known anything beyond the confinements of my structured life. When I felt like I was alone in the world, the newsies had been there to show me that nobody is alone. But they not only helped me to learn more about other people, they helped me to learn more about myself.

It almost felt like yesterday, when I was standing on the docks in Brooklyn, talking to Booker about everything that I wanted to do in my life. About the house that I wanted to buy. The one that overlooks the ocean and how I wanted to paint it blue and purple because that was what the house looked like in the painting that my mother loved so much. I never would have been able to tell anybody else about my dreams because they were something so deep and personal. But Booker was a friend and he understood everything that I said.

Sometimes I got the strange feeling that I was a stranger in my own mind. When I was younger, my parents had never let me be my own person. I had always been forced to be the person that they wanted me to be. I couldn't tell them what I wanted my life to be like. Because they already had it planned out for me. I loved my parents with all my heart and I still do. But they had made me so dependent on other people, that it almost destroyed me.

I had spent all of the time that I had lived with the newsies, thinking about how horrible my life was. But there were certain times that made me question whether my life was really that bad. Times like the night that Racetrack and I sat on the roof of the Lodging House and he told me about his past. I wasn't the only one who had been thrown into this sort of situation. It was just the fact that I had been raised in such a different manner, that it was a shock when I first saw the way that some people actually had to live.

I was startled out of my daydream, when I felt someone's hand on my shoulder. I looked up quickly and saw that it was just Spot. "Come wit me," he said causally and I wondered where he wanted to go. But I didn't ask, I just followed him in silence.


	31. THE END!

****

IT'S FINALLY FINISHED! And I think I feel like crying. I can't believe this is the first story that I have ever actually finished. I don't know what I would have done without all of my wonderful reviewers pushing me along. Sometime soon I will be going over it and revising everything that I messed up on…and there's a lot. Lol But I just want to thank everyone who every read this story! I luv you all!

Chapter Thirty

The wind was blowing the curls gently out of my face as I starred solemnly up ahead at Spot. We were walking in the direction away from the fair but the soft sound of the music could still be heard. My torn, and tattered boots kicked small rocks on the pathway as I starred down at my feet, waiting for him to speak. It didn't take very long before he took my hand and led me up onto a small bridge. One that passes over a tiny stream that was running swiftly below us.

I could still see the lights from the fair glowing beyond the trees and I wondered why Spot had taken me to such a secluded area. If it had been any other newsie I think I would have been slightly nervous. But I knew that Spot had no wrong intentions, so it didn't frighten me in the slightest bit. I leaned over the thick cobblestone edge and starred at the water below. My hideous fear of heights had been diminished over time. I didn't fear much of anything anymore, because I no longer feared death.

Ever since I was a little girl I had always loved the sound of running water. It was so calm and tranquil, as if it somehow had the power to wash away all my pain. I knew that it was foolish to think such a thing, but I did not care. I think that sometimes it's helpful to hold on to childish memories, because it saves you from becoming to serious about life. It gives you hope and makes you believe that somewhere out there, there's something that can come and take all your pain and misery away. If even just for a second in your mind.

"It's amazing isn't it…this bridge?" Spot asked as I turned and looked at him. It was strange to hear him talking so intently about something so deep and meaningful.

"Yes…I do not understand how something so grand and elaborate could be built by the hands of man, but there can't be one simple solution for the two of us." Warm tears flowed down my cheeks, as they had so many times in the past few months. Spot just sighed.

"Everything has it's own time," he replied. As he walked over and leaned up against the edge of the bridge.

"I know," I replied sadly. "But I still must leave." Spot fidgeted uncomfortably and then looked down at the water.

It took a few minutes and then he spoke. "I think dat it would be for da best. At least for you and for da rest of us." I nodded my head and chocked back a sob. There remained a few moments of silence and we both just thought about the days that laid ahead.

"I think I will be alright," I said softly. "I heard that Virginia is beautiful and I will be able to go to school once more. So I can finally have something to do with my life." I tried to sound enthusiastic but it wasn't working.

Spot just nodded his head as he looked up into my eyes. For the first time in many weeks, the wall that he had placed up had been torn away and I could see into his soul. He was trying to act strong for me and I would remain eternally grateful. For if Spot broke down just then, I knew in my heart that I would not have had the strength to leave. Suddenly the music coming from the fair changed, it turned both soft and sorrowful. A song filled with too many unspoken emotions. Spot turned to me and held out his hand.

"Would ya care for a dance?" he asked as he gazed longingly into my tearful green eyes.

"But you do not like to dance," I said, remembering the night at the restaurant. The night when he had first told me that he loved me. I sniffed my nose ungratefully, for I did not have a handkerchief with me at the moment. But Spot didn't seem to notice.

"Yes, well I have danced with a lady such as yourself, once before." I smiled weakly as I placed my hand in his own. I laid my head softly upon his chest and he wrapped his arms around my waist.

I could smell the lingering sent of tobacco on Spot's clothes and it made me smile. Yet I felt a slight bit of sadness as I was reminded of the fact that it would be the last time I would ever see any of my friends again. I knew that going to Virginia would be for the best and that it was something that I had to do. But I had grown to depend on Spot for so many things, that I couldn't imagine living a life without him.

Yet I had to get out of the hole that I had mistakenly fallen into and start making a life of my own. It scared me to think that I would actually be able to make decisions and be free to do anything that I wished. It was something that I had craved for so long and now that it was right before me, I didn't know if I was ready to face such a thing.

I knew that even though I would be back among the higher class of society, I would never forget the lessons that I learned. Because I had felt what it was like for both sides of society and it had opened my eyes to many new realizations. I had learned first hand, that life isn't always greener on the other side. That no matter where you are, you should never take for granted anything that you have. Because one day you may wake up and realize that its all gone.

If things hadn't turned out the way that they had, I would have stayed with Spot forever. But sometimes things don't work out the way that you want them to. But I believe that everything happens for a reason and that no matter how much hardships I will face in the future, its all leading up to something. When things happen that you that you have no control over, I think its best just to leave them be. Because its not good to dwell on the past, all you can do is work for a better tomorrow.

I would be leaving with Olivia the next morning and I wondered what it would be like at my new home. I tried to picture a house just like the one that I lived in when I was younger. With a women in charge who was both strong and beautiful, just like my mother had been. I wondered if Olivia's aunt would keep it just as neat and perfect, or if things would be entirely different. But no matter what happens I would never forget everything that my friends had taught me. I wish somehow that I could have erased the line that separated the rich from the poor. But this was a battle that would never be won. Yet I would be dammed if I would join in for the ride.

So as I stood there upon the bridge, holding the boy I loved for the last time. I realized just how short life really was and how so much time is wasted searching for a love so perfect. When most of the time its stands right in front of your eyes, but you are somehow to blind to notice. It just lays hidden behind a vial, waiting for the proper time to reveal itself to our hearts. But sometimes it comes to late and time has already moved on, making it impossible for the two hearts to be together. But just the few moments that they spend in each others arms, will leave an impact so great that they will forever be left with the memories. But also with the satisfaction of knowing that one day they may have the chance to be together once more. So as Spot and I, starred into each others eyes, I thanked god for this dance. Because I knew that Spot Conlon was my savior in every way and I was the flame that burned in his eyes.

Now, many years later…on my 21st birthday. I sit upon the porch of my purple house and listen to ocean that lay just beyond the cliff. I have written down the story of my life in hopes that it has somehow helped you to see the world in a different point of view. But as I left Spot on the bridge that day and walked alone into the darkness. I knew not what laid before me. All I knew was that I would never forget the summer of 1899 and the small group of boys that forever changed my life and hopefully, yours as well.

__

I would have closed my eyes forever

Just to hide from all my pain…

But forever wasn't long enough

To save me from the rain.

With every breath I took,

It felt like daggers in my heart…

I was desperately defeated

and my world was torn apart.

**__**

Chorus:

****

The winds of fate had carried us

through trial and through fear.

I know that destiny had its reasons,

But sometimes its not so clear.

Our many differences divided us,

But in our hearts we still remained.

You were the one who saved me,

And I was your secret flame.

Your eyes were cold and dreary,

Like the mist upon the sea…

If you didn't love yourself,

Then how could you possibly love me.

It was a long and gruesome battle,

To ignite the fire within your soul…

Then it took our broken pieces,

and made us something whole.

****

Chorus:

…you were the one who saved me and I was the Heat of the Flame.

****

Thank you:

C.M. Higgins- You are the most important person, I have to thank. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you talking me through things all the time. You are a wonderful friend and I am so glad that I met you(online) lol. You always give me such great advice and you kept me writing, when I was about to stop. Thanks so much, for always saying such wonderful things about my writing and never putting me down. I will ttyl,lylas.

Long and Winding Road- I love getting new reviewer's! Thank you so much! Yeah I am really really sad that this story is over. But I am happy that people are still reading it. Don't worry, I will be writing other newsies story's with Spot in it. Actually at the moment, my friend and I are planning a story together. I think you will enjoy it. Anyway, I hope to hear from you again!

Splashey- YAY! Your back! Its alright that you didn't review the last chapter. I understand. I am just happy that you are still here and reading this story. You have to be one of the most long and dedicated readers that I have. I don't know what I would do without you guys. I just can't believe that this story is finished. It's the first one I have finished…ever! I hope you liked the ending. I was afraid that it would suck. Lol But I hope to hear from you soon! Thanks again

Dimonah Tralon- Thank you so much for reading my story this long. You have been one of my most constant reviewers and I really appreciate it. You really did keep me writing through the story. If I didn't get such wonderful review's, I don't know if I would have finished. Please let me know what you thought of the ending. I can't believe this was the last chapter! Thanks again!

truecalifornian- Thanks, thanks, thanks. Its reviewers like you, that make me really hate to end this story. You are so sweet and I really appreciate how encouraging you have been. I hope that you liked the ending to this story. I know that it isn't very long, but I feel that any more, would have been to much. Please let me know what you think!

Hopscotch and Link- Thank you so much!!!! You are such a sweet person and I really appreciate everything the fact that you love my story so much. It really means a lot to me. I really hate having to end the story like this. But I can't keep it going on forever. I can't say thanks enough and I hope you like this chapter as much as you liked the other ones.

Koodles4You- Awww, you make me want to cry! I am so sorry that I have to end the story. But I can't keep it going on forever, even though I want it to. I know that this chapter wasn't the longest but I hope that you enjoyed it as much as you did the rest of my story. You are so sweet and I really thank you for all of the nice things you said to me. You really kept me writing for as long as I did. Without you I don't know if I would have finished it. Please, please, let me know what you think!

The Good Girl- Thank you! I really hope that you liked this chapter. Please review and let me know what you think of the ending chapter. It makes me want to cry, to think that there wont be any more.

Eva young- Thank you very much! I am so happy that you like my story. I always love to hear from people. Especially when they say such nice things. I hope that you liked this chapter. It makes me sad to think that there wont be any more. But thanks so much for your compliments. I really appreciate it so much.

Luv ya all,

BlackWiltedRose


	32. Thank You's

Well I decided to post up one new chapter with just thank-you's to everyone who finished my story. Here they are…

long and winding road- Hey! I can't say enough how happy you make me when I read your reviews. No matter what, you have always been so kind and said such wonderful things. I know I said it all the time, but reviewers like you are the ones that make me really love writing. I am so happy that you finished my story and wasn't to disappointed with the ending. I know it wasn't exactly a happy one, but who knows what I have planned for the future… I hope that you keep reading my stories (when I get a new one posted) and enjoy them as much as you liked this one. Lol And I am glad you decided to read it again. Although now that I read over it myself, I see SO many mistakes that I will have to correct in the future. But I will get around to that later. Thank you again!

Swimade333- Aww, I am sorry that I made you cry with the ending to this story. I know that its supposedly a good thing, but I hate to make people cry. That's why I don't understand why I tend to write sad stories. Oh well! Anyway, thank you so much for continuing to read my story. You have stuck with me for awhile and I cant tell you how happy that made me. You gave me good advice when I needed it and helped me to write a better story. I hope that you will enjoy my future stories, but I don't know if I can compete with this one. I hope that I will only get better. I just wanted to say thanks again, your kind comments have helped me to finally finish this story!

Elyse- HI! I am so happy when I get new reviewers. You are so nice and I really appreciate all of your compliments. I am so happy that you liked my story. To tell you the truth I am extremely shocked that so many people loved it as much as they did. Because now that I read over it, I have found so many stupid mistakes, mainly in the beginning chapters, that I don't know how so many people actually wanted to continue reading it. But I have always been really critical of my work. So I will just try and listen to other peoples opinions. Well, I am really happy that you liked the ending. I know it was sad but if you read any of my other newsie things. I tend to write sad stories for some reason. I don't know why because I am a really happy person. But I guess that's just what I'm good at. Yeah I did enjoy the relationship that Racetrack and Doll shared and I debating a lot on whether or not I should make them get together. But I decided that it would be more interesting and dramatic with Spot. Actually I have always been thinking about whether I would be making a sequel or not. Yet if I do, it wont be for a little. I was kind of relieved when this story was over because I could finally work on other things. Well thanks again for all of your wonderful compliments.

splashey- Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. I can't seem to say it enough. Not matter how horrible I though a chapter was, you would always be there to say something nice and make me feel less sad about how bad I had been slacking off. You have been one of my oldest reviewers and never once have you said anything bad. I don't know what I would do without you guys there to keep me motivated. When I first started this story I really doubted that I would actually finish it. Because I had started a few other stories before that and they didn't turn out the best. I hope that now, this will give me motivation to actually start and finish another story. I have been writing short stories in my spare time and people seem to enjoy them a lot. So that helps me to. I don't know when I will be coming out with another chapter, newsie fic. But I have a good idea in my head and I will probably start writing it soon. I remember back when I only had one chapter posted and only a few reviews. I never thought that I would actually make it of to 260 reviews. That is crazy to me. Thank you so much your reviews meant a lot!

CandyMoon- Hey, I am so happy that you decided to read my story. I know if was a sad ending but I tend to write sad stories. Not every tale has a happy ending even though we want them to. Don't worry though, I may actually write a sequel but I don't know when it will come out. I have been thinking about it ever since I started getting towards the end of my story. Well thank you for taking the time to read it and I hope that you will enjoy my future stories to come.

Hopscotch and Link- Hey! Thank you so much! Your wonderful comments and compliments mean the world to me. You have helped me continue writing through a lot of tough times when I thought that I would stop. Don't worry, I don't care that you asked me to read your story. I love it and think you are wonderful writers. I know that I don't give great advice on how to improve things. I never was giving good help, I think I am better at taking advice, than giving it. I really do enjoy you story so much and I know that I haven't reviewed but that was because my computer was being stupid for awhile. I have continued reading it though and I really enjoy it a lot. I can't seem to understand why you don't get any reviews. I promise that I will try harder to think of ways to get more people to read you story and I will let you know soon. Thanks again, you guys are great!

koodles4you- You are such a sweet person and no matter what you have always said such nice things. I am very good at taking constructive criticism, but just like anyone, nice comments like yours really helped me to want to continue writing. There were a few people who just stuck by me and you guys were the reasons that I updated every week that I could. Because I hated to make you wait and I was afraid that if I took a break that I would loose faith and stop writing. I tended to do that with my other stores. I am extremely pleased that my readers didn't take the sad ending as bad as I thought you guys would. Actually a lot of people have told me that it was a good ending. I am one of those people that don't believe every story should end with a 'Happily Ever After' not matter how much I want it to. But I will give you some good news, I am debating on whether or not to write a sequel. If I do, it wont be for a little while. Because I want to get a few more things finished before I start another story. Thank you again for being such a wonderful reviewer and sticking with my story.

trucalifornian- I love how you are always so positive and enthusiastic. I wish everybody would be more like you when they review. I am so glad that you like the ending. I say this to everyone, but I was really, really worried that my readers wouldn't like it and get made at me. Because I always do tend to write sad stories. I will try and not make the next story I write, depressing. But I think the reason that I made Doll leave at the end was because I like to do things that people don't expect and with most fan fictions, they always end happy. So I decided to have her leave at the end. Because that's just how real life is, not everything ends happy. But I am so glad that you like it and I just had to make another page dedicated to saying that you to everyone who has stuck by me. I hope that you will continue reading my stories.

The Good Girl- Thank you, your last review meant a lot to me. I love writing and I have always been so hard on myself when it came to complimenting my own work. Everyone tells me that I am such a good writer but I never seem to see it, until someone points it out. Even then its really difficult. Because I see all of the mistakes that I make. But I am also an extreme perfectionist, so unless it truly perfect, I will think there's something wrong. But I think that it is something that I need to get over, I mean I am only in 11th grade in high school. Nothing that I write will be perfect. I am horrible at spelling and I tend to write what's going on in my head, whether it makes sense or not. But you are so nice and I am really, really happy that you liked the ending to my story. I hope that you will continue to read my stories in the future and give me advice on how to improve my work. Your wonderful comments meant so much to me and I am happy that I finished the story. I think I did it more for my readers, than for myself.

Dimonah Tralon- No matter what, you have stuck by my story for so long. I loved knowing that I had such wonderful readers who not matter what would read my story every week. Your opinions are what kept me writing. I don't think this story ever would have gotten finished if it wasn't for reviewers like you. I am so incredibly happy that you liked the ending and thanks for all of the advice that you gave me during the beginning. I really do hope that you continue reading my work and please let me know what you think. Thanks again!

C.M. Higgins- I put you last on purpose. Because I knew that yours would be the longest. Out of all my reviewers you have been the one person who really kept me writing this story. I am so happy when we finally became friends and I am truly grateful for your help. You sit there all the time and help me out with so many things that are going on in my life and not matter what, you never say anything bad. I really do cherish your help and I don't know what I would do without you. You are always there to talk when nobody else is. I know that we don't know each other personally (we live like a state apart) but I really consider you one of my really great friends. I thought it was funny how I would always have you read my chapters first and tell me what you thought. Just getting your reaction was worth writing it. No matter what, you were always one of the first people to review every chapter and give me confidence that other people would like it as well. I also think that you are such a wonderful writer yourself and I can't wait to see what you have in store. No matter what I know that it will be great! Well I will talk to you soon! I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate everything!


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